So a priest, a rabbi, a blonde and a black person walk into a bar. The Bar Tender says, "Is this some kind of joke"

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Why was the chubby bird that you were staring at you angry. Because you were looking at him.

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Knock Knock Whos there? The police, we've been getting reports of many ironically named metaphors knocking on your door to which you reply witty utterances, can you explain this frankly quite disturbing behaviour? The police, we've been getting reports of many ironically named metaphors knocking on your door to which you reply witty utterances, can you explain this frankly quite disturbing behaviour who? Wait aren't you the one who's supposed to supposed tell the punchline? Oh Yeah

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Three men walk into a bar. They order drinks. This joke isn't funny.

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SQUID DOMINATION!!! Squids WILL Take Over the World!!!

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what do you get if you eat cream cake, coffee cake, strawberry cake, chocolate cake, fruit cake, and sponge cake? a very large stomach-cake.

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How much coke can Charlie Sheen do? Enough to kill two and a half men.

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what do you call a duck with no legs? a sitting duck

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How do you know if you have athlete's foot? You ask your doctor, and he will tell you.

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How do you get a small girl of a swing ? Throw a fridge at her

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Why did the koala fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the baby fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the koala.

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Did you see Helen Keller at the movie theater? I didn't either, she's dead.

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Why is a blonde girl crying in the bathroom? Because she has been bullied and someone broke her nose.

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Hey, is that your corvette? No, I thought it was yours.

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Why do vampires drink blood? Maybe if they existed you could ask one.

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Why did the car crash? The driver was female.

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Q: What do you get when an angry black man walks past you. A: You get a promotion, the black guy was your friend Bob and he had just been suspended for failing to follow police protocol when apprehending a suspect.

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Fuzzy Wuzzy was a bear, Fuzzy Wuzzy had no hair. Fuzzy Wuzzy had stage 4 skin cancer.

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A black person tans and starts to peel, what do you get? A white person.

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I once saw my grandparents making love.. that's why I dont eat raisens

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A man says to a woman, "hey, bitch, shut your fucking mouth you goddamn hooker." Most hookers are used to it.

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The man goes to the doctor after just losing his job because his company went under because of the econmic crisis. His house is being foreclosed because without the money from his job he can't afford to pay for his house. His girlfriend also just left him because of recent conflicts about money and she was looking forward to having a family and with him jobless it was just out of the question. Man:"Doctor I could really use some good news" Doctor:"You have aids"

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What did one wall say to the other? Nothing. Walls can't talk.

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I hate it when sentences don't end the way you expect them potato.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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