A man goes to the pound to adopt a dog and sees a very shaggy dog and says "WOW! Thats a shaggy dog I'll take it!" So the man takes home his new dog and decides to enter the dog in the towns anual shaggy dog contest. and wins. After winning the town shaggy dog contest he moves up to the county shaggy dog contest. theres no competition. Now the man and his dog enter into the state shaggy dog contest, the states shaggiest dogs are all competing. the man wins. Finally the man and his dog are in the prestigious national shaggy dog contest. The judge walks up to the man and says "your dog isn't very shaggy"

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Two gay guys go into a bedroom, in different houses at different times.

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Chuck Norris can watch TV.

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Question: why did the pilot crash the plane? Answer: because the pilot was a loaf of bread

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Why did the tortoise beat the hare. The tortoise had carcinoma thyroid cancer in the renal pelvis uterur.

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Is there any non dirty numbers these days, 69, just kidding

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What did Timmothy get when he got back from his vacation in a tropical destination? Malaria.

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What do you call a man with a convex isogonal nonprismatic head? Rhombicosidodecahedron head.

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Penis. (Note: if you get this you have a dirty ass)

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yo mamma's so fat, when she jumped into the ocean, everyone yelled "tsunami!".

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How do you torture Helen Keller? Give her a cheese-grater and tell her it's a book.

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why was the boy crying? ... because he had a frog stapled yo his face.

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A horse walked into a bar. The bartender asked: "Why the long face?" The horse said: "My wife just died."

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What does AIDS smell like? AIDS has no smell. AIDS is a diease contracted though sexual contact with another being with the diease. It greatly increases the risk of infections and malignancy. Although AIDS has no smell, in the final stages large sores develope on the surface of the skin. This means you are going to die. Thus, HIV/AIDS has no smell.

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Q: What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in the water? A: Shark bait.

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What do you say to an over weight Jewish mother? "Work on those crunches" He was her coach.

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Why did the black man win the race Because he was faster than all the other contestants

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epic win?

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What is funnier than an uncontrolled explosions? Most things, because explosions damage property, and cause deaths.

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Get a life besides thumbing down statements telling you advice.........

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Q. How do you make an oil lamp turn off? A. Break it.

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What did the man with cancer say to the Holocaust survivor? "I have cancer."

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What's the difference between a murcielago and a dead baby ? I don't have a dead baby in my garage. 8-)

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What do you call a fat man in a tiny pipe? Stuck.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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