Why is the baby not crying? Because it died of herpes. JUST KIDDING! Babies can't get herpes.

What do you call a black man with a knife in his hand? A surgeon.

Billy Idol walks into a New York City Bar. He snorts lines of coke with his comrades in the bathroom and continues his night by having sex with attractive underage females

What do a carrot and a kangaroo have in common? Nothing...

Why is Six afraid of Seven? Because Seven is a psychopath, that's why.

I would write a joke, but it wouldn't be funny

Did you hear the one about the kid that farted in class? Cool.

What's red and bad for youur teeth? A brick.

What did the Spanish immigrant say? Olah.

Why did the cat eat his food? Because he was hungry.

I got into an argument with my friend the other day. He contested that the onion was the only food that could make you cry, so I beat his wife to death with a coconut,

Why did the little girlbnot wake up? Because her mother smothered her in her sleep.

STOP BULLYING FAT PEOPLE. They have enough on their plate

Whats the difference between a ghost and a dolphin? Ghosts aren't dolphins.

Why did the girl drop her ice cream her cone broke

A child walked into the bar. He was promptly asked to leave because he was too young.

Knock Knock Who's There ........................ ........................................... I hate doorbell ditchers

Q: What's worse than losing your job? A: Seeing your entire family die in a car accident

What happened to the adventurer ? He took an arrow to the knee and became a guard.

Okay okay, its not like I wanted a serious answer anyway, bye!

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

You're such a baby, that you are still in diapers! Ew! How would you know creep!

Why did the chicken cross the road? It was being chased by a wolf that eventually killed and ate it.

Q:where does baby oil come from? A:Only the finest of babies

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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