I need somebody to lean on... ...Because one of my legs was amputated after I was blown up on a mine field in afganistan.

What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A pizza doesn't scream in the oven. Ha ha ha ha

WHY DID THE KID RID HIS BRICK HE WAS BLIND

what's black, white and doesn't float? the titanic

Justin Beiber

Roses are red Violets are Blue Little Timmy died yesterday

What do you call a black person driving a plane? A pilot, because you dont want to call him anything racist i mean he is driving you up 25,000 ft in the air and the last thing you want is for him to get mad and decide to do something rational, God, you racists.

Roses are Razzmatazz Violets are Arsenic These colors are weird Cancer.

Why is bobsledding the coolest sport? Because this is my subjective opinion.

Two girls were taken away mysteriously in the night. The next day, no one cared because they were orphans.

How do you make Lady Gaga cry? Make hurtful and upsetting remarks about her person.

Boy: Hey girl if I had hand-cuffs, I’d lock myself to you right now! Girl: I would find that extremely creepy.

Waht do chinease people and gambling machines have in common? They both say chink chink chink chink chink chinck

Hurricane sandy should have been named hurricane snooki because it ruined the jersey shore

Why was the girl crying? DEEZ NUTS!

What's black, white, and red all over? White on black homicide.

A man walks into a bar and orders four shots. Before the bartender asks "If it really is that bad of a day". The man says "Yea I need this shit". The next day the bar is overwhelmed with police and investigators. The bartender had emptied a revolver in the tired business man's face and vanished.

Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven was convicted of murder and rape

What do you call a black guy doing community service? Someone who wanted to give back. Stop being racist.

Q: How do you get a one armed blond of of a tree? A: You grab a ladder and help her down safely.

What did little Timmy get for Christmas after he was diagnosed with leukemia? A gift card to Bed Bath and Beyond because he was interested in redecorating.

Me: You know what's funnier than 24. Friend: 25? Me: No, 9/11

Her doctor told her that if she didn't start watching her cholesterol she might suffer from heart related illness in the near future.

A baby walks into a bar and the bartender says.... Where is your mom?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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