How can you avoid being hit by a car? Don't get in the way.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Knock knock... Whos there? The IRS, we are taking your house.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Yo mama's so ugly that the majority of people find her physically unattractive, but I hear her personality if great.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

GRAAAAAAAR.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd probably put all the labials, coronals and dorsals in separate places sorted into plosives, nasals and fricatives, with the vowels at the beginning to make it more logical and easily attainable to foreigners unfamiliar with the Latin alphabet.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

a horse walks in to a bar and the bar tender asks, "why the long face?" The horse doesn't respond because it is a horse and is confused by its surroundings and then gallops out of the bar knocking over a few tables as it makes its escape.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Two tomatoes where crossing the road, when one of them barely avoided being run over. The other said, come on tomato!

thumb_up thumb_down -27

So two muffins are in an oven. They get baked.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

What do you call a black man who works in a ice-cream truck? A Ice-Creem Man

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Bert: Hey, what you got there? Sal: Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Intercom:ALERT! THERES AND EXTREIMEST IS THE SCHOOL! Little kid: Sir, can I borrow that towel on your head? BOOOOOOM!

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What makes George Michael gay? The fact he engages in sexual intercourse with other men.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Voldemort's nose is so flat, that it looks like he doesn't have a nose.

thumb_up thumb_down -46

Whose your daddy? Not me

thumb_up thumb_down -10

a man was cooking a tortilla. what did he say when he dropped it while flipping the tortilla? oops i dropped my tortilla

thumb_up thumb_down +3

So a man and his wife were in a horrible car accident. The man died, so why isn't the wife mourning his death? Because she is also dead. But, do you know who did mourn and cry over this horrible tragedy? Their children, other family members, and friends.

thumb_up thumb_down

Why do black people have nightmares? Because we killed the only one with a dream.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

-my friend Cassie is coming over - oh is she cute? -yea but she's not my type -oh that's understandable then

thumb_up thumb_down -20

A man walks into a bar. I don't know what happened next because I was waiting outside for my friend.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

Whats big and red and eats rocks? A big red rockeater.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

What's black and white and red all over? A mime that got hit by a train

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Who's the cutest girl in the world? Claire Seiter.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why is it when birds fly in a "V" shape one side is longer? There's more birds on that side.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

A guy walks into a bar. He meets a girl and they have a great time. He calls her the next day and their relationship continues for many months. Eventually they get married and have children.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops