Have you heard of the lawnmower joke? (NO) Neither have I!

Q:What happened after the snake tricked Adam and Eve into eating fruit from the tree of wisdom? A: Nothing, but the three of knowledge was a whole other story though. Moral Man.

why was 7 afraid of 8, cause 8,9,10

A 8 year old kid and his dad are having quality time at the park,and relax at a nearby picnic bench after a thrilling game of tag."I love you." says the son. The father about to respond,promptly gets shot by 3 stray military issue assault rifle bullets that came from a heated dispute about a stolen car that got way out of hand. He dies,and the kid ran crying a long distance away. After he gets himself in a dark alley with nobody else around he laughs,and mutters "The plan went perfectly!" He pulls out a detonator and presses it. The White House,Washington Monument,and several nuclear power plants across the continental United States blow up,killing millions of people.The child,also in possession of nuclear bombs, holds the entire world hostage and becomes ruler of the entire planet Earth. Fin.

How many Jews does it take to change a light bulb? Three. One to change the light bulb and two to file a lawsuit.

Knock Knock? whos there? The man at the door then finds himself thinking what his last name is as he lately got amnesia

LET

no pen = no studying no studying = bad grades bad grades = no job no job = no money no money = no food no food = death DON'T LOSE YOUR PEN

why did hannibal lector butter up the teacher? he wanted to get a good grade. he also wanted to eat her

wanna hear a good joke? neither do I

whats worse than find a worm in your apple? finding the holocaust in your apple.

Why did Sarah fall off the swing? She had no arms or legs. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Sarah.

Where was I born? Pakistan. You?

What's the funniest part about this site? You're alone and reading this joke instead of getting a date.

A seal walks into a club.

Q. how do you get 50 babies into a bowl? A. blender Q. how do you get them out of the bowl? A. Doritos

There was a man who entered a local paper's pun contest. He sent in ten different puns. He won.

Wanna hear a "Friday" parody? No, that would be copyright infringement.

what is Justin Bieber+ One Less Lonely girl.... A BABY

Lance Armstrong gets on a bike

Wanna know what my grandma said before she kicked the bucket? Hey grandson, how far do you think I can kick this bucket?

Why did the cat bite its owner's? Because the owner had been dead for several days and the cat was locked in the house with nothing else to eat.

How many dead babies can you fit in a bath tub? 17

Damn, I was gonna do my laundry but Amanda Todd drank all my bleach

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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