A man asks his doctor if you can die from drinking to much water. The doctor replies 'Yes you can'

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Why did the girl take a shower? Because she was dirty

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How much moss must a Moschops chop if a Moschops must chop moss?

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You know who can't stand to put up with my shit? Polio victims.

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roses are red violets are blue i fucked your mom so did you

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why is ginger kid so sad? Because his all family was killed

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Knock Knock Who's There No-one your not very popular

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What happens when you put Michael Jackson in a room full of little boys? The 3 year-old rotting corpse of Michael Jackson and a room full of traumatized little boys.

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if you are reading this your wasting your time

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How do you keep an elephant from charging? Ask nicely.

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Q: What was Steve Jobs' last words before he died? A: I Think i might die.

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why were the negros at whitney houstons funeral smiling? because there were free sandwiches!

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Who are you if you can rub 2 ice cubes to make fire? Chuck Norris

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Yo mama's so fat, she died of a mixture of obesity and type 1 diabetes.

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you wanna hear a joke? no

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Doctor, doctor, I just swallowed a roll of film! That was an incredibly foolish and dangerous thing for you to do. I would be surprised if you survived another day before the chemicals corrode your stomach lining and release hydrofluoric acid throughout your body causing sepsis.

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a mexican guy and a black guy are in a car, who is driving? the mexican, the black guy is in the passenger seat

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a dyslexic man walks into a bra and realizes he is quite lucky as another man walks into a large steel pole

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Knock Knock. Who's there? The Police. She told me she was nineteen.

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If a fish eats fish bait, and a dog eats dog bait, what does a master eat? Anything he feels like eating at the given moment provided it is in accordance to his diet and beliefs.

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A pony goes to the doctor saying his throat hurts, the doctor sais "oh I know, your a little hoarse". The pony replies, no I'm not ass-hole I have strep throat.

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Confucius says... The superior man, when resting in safety, does not forget that danger may come. When in a state of security he does not forget the possibility of ruin. When all is orderly, he does not forget that disorder may come. Thus his person is not endangered, and his States and all their clans are preserved.

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What did Freddie Mercurys father say at Freddies funeral. "Thats the cleanest hole our Freddies ever been in".

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Why did you laugh at this joke. Because it was funny.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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