A little boy walks into a bar its fine, he's over 21, he just looks younger.

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Q. Why did the Muslim go to hell? A. Because his name was Osama Bin laden.

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Q. Why didn't the Hero rescue the princess? A. Because he crunched some numbers, realized the incredible odds against him, and decided against it.

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what did jacob say to coach a joke

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Three bars walk into a Jew.

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Did you hear about that man who ate 17 cheeseburgers?! I didn't.

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Psychic wanted. You know where to apply.

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The chicken crossed the road.

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Why did the Wife cheat on her Husband? Because she was a f***ing BITCH.

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Q: Why did Sally not like her trip to Hawaii? A: A volcano erupted and killed her whole family.

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Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, your wife and kids die.

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Knock knock whose there? i have a warrant, i excpect you to come out peacefully with you hands behind you back

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Why did the elephant cross the river? CAUSE YOLO (even though he died)

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Your mom is so black, i shot a bullet at her. It came back and said i need a flashlight.

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What is a vampires favorite desert? Vampires aren't real.

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Why did the black man cross the road? Because he lived an worked on opposite sides of the road, and so consequently needed to cross the road to work, and provide an income for his family, so they could have fresh food, clean water, and have money to pay the bills such as the mortgage so they didnt become poor and homeless, which would inevitably lead to illness and an early death for them all.

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Why did the Sara fall off the swing, Because she had no arms. Knock, knock Who's there not sara.

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What do you call cheese that's not yours? Stolen Property.

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A: If a quiz is quizzical, what is a test? B: A test can be many things: 1. A procedure for critical evaluation; a means of determining the presence, quality, or truth of something; a trial: a test of one's eyesight; subjecting a hypothesis to a test; a test of an athlete's endurance. 2. A series of questions, problems, or physical responses designed to determine knowledge, intelligence, or ability. 3. A basis for evaluation or judgment: "A test of democratic government is how Congress and the president work together" (Haynes Johnson). 4. Chemistry a. A physical or chemical change by which a substance may be detected or its properties ascertained. b. A reagent used to cause or promote such a change. c. A positive result obtained. 5. A cupel. A: Oh.

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A man walks into a bar... But, it's not funny because he's an alcoholic and it's destroying his family.

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A goose walks into a bar. Maybe he should have ducked.

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What happens when you put an embryo in a blender? I don't know, I was too busy jerking off.

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What happenes if you put an elephant in the fridge? Nothing, it wouldnt fit.

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What kind of animal eats and pisses on everything? Your mother. -Avery Vartanian

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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