What's the same about a clown and a knife? They are both fun, except for the clown. I hate clowns.

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Why did Teddy eat dirt? Because he was hungry.

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Why was the woman out of the kitchen? She was at her mother's funeral.

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Haikus are lovely But sometimes do not make sense Refrigerator

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What's funnier than British people ? Their tea in the Harbor

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Why was Six afraid of Seven? Seven was in a horrible car accident recently and became very disfigured. He didn't tell Six, so the initial shock of seeing him for the first time was quite jarring for Six. Seven has had multiple surgeries since and, once the swelling recedes, he should look much better. It will still hurt for him to chew though.

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What do you call a person with cancer A hospital patient, what did you expect? Oh. Of course you expected Chewbacca.

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Patriarchy.

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What's the difference between a bench and a mexican? A bench is an inatimate object that people sit on and a mexican is a person of mexican descent

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What did the fat confused man say? I am confused.

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Has anyone told you, you look fat today?" "Because you don't.

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While on a business trip, a Jim got a call on his cell phone. It was his best friend. He was informing Jim of his wife's death in a terrible train crash. She didn't die on impact, but her legs were cut off by metal debris from the train car in front of her. She fought against the pain and used a shirt she found from a dead body to stop the bleeding. She managed to drag herself to the nearest road crossing, where someone drove her to the hospital. Despite her efforts to survive and the surgeons efforts to save her, she died that night as a result of excessive blood loss. After he hung up, Jim turned up the ringer volume on his phone because he couldn't hear it very well when it rang.

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A baby seal walks into a club. I happens to be that the club is having their bi-annual PETA meeting, and the baby seal is chosen as the organization's new mascot. After touring the nation and meeting important world leaders, the baby seal still wonders why there was a club at the North Pole.

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Q) What did the Hobo get for Xmas? A) Nothing

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Q. What's short and black A. A little black kid

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What do you call 2 midgets and a pencil rolling down a hill? Satan

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My mother-in-law fell down a wishing well, I was amazed, I never knew they worked

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What did the parents say to their kid? You're adopted and we don't love you.

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a woman came back from a long vacation, one of her male employes noticed that her breast were much larger, "wow, did you get a boob job?" he asked. she replied "no i have breast cancer"

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When Michael Jackson was in a dark tunnel, it didn't work when he turned his flashlight. How come? A: Because it was out of battery

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Two men walk into a bar, the third man ducks.

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Why did the girl talk to her computer? Because she was Skyping with some faraway friends. Why were her friends far away? She was sent to the moon. Why was she sent to the moon? Because she tried to create eternal night.

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What do black people and tornadoes have in common? - It only takes one to destroy a neighborhood.

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Dad: i hate you. dads son:(kills him self)

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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