Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he can't fly

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Your mom is so fat, She should go to a doctor because her cholesterol is abnormally high.

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What does a person and a tree have in common? You can knock them down if you hit them repeatedly with an axe.

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The other day, I broke my snare drum.... I still haven't fixed it and am planning on doing so soon.

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Two muffins are sitting in an oven. They then proceed to bake into tasty pastries which are then eaten for snacks or maybe a light breakfast.

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You know what turns me on ....? TABLES!! You know what turns me on even more...? TABLES WITH CHAIRS!!!

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She has no arms. Knock Knock "Who's there?" Not Sally!

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what do a fish and wood have in common? when they're dead, they float

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Knock Knock, Who's There? Come in. Come in who? Your mom

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What do 9 out of 10 people like? Gang rape.

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Knock Knock! Who's there? Your landlord. I'm here to collect rent

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What's the difference between a Mexican and a T-Rex? There are certainly innumerable differences, but, in general, humans are vertebrates belonging to the Mammalia class, chiefly a member of the species Homo sapiens; dinosaurs are chiefly terrestrial, herbivorous or carnivorous reptiles from the extinct orders Saurischia and Ornithischia.

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A horse walks into the bar and says "why the long face?" The bartender replies "hey! I was supposed to say that!"

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People talk about how there grandparents was in the holocaust well my grandpa was to he died. How he fell off the guard tower.

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What is the difference between Harry Potter and a Jew? Harry Potter escapes the chamber.

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Whats worse than bitting into a apple and finding a worm? Being the worm who just lost nearly half his whole house because some jerk decided to eat an apple on the ground, whom after eating the apple destroyed the worms self-esteem by making the comparison to the worse thing possible. Or being raped by Zeus in the form of a worm.

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Knock Knock Who is there? The IRS coming to take your house

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A man walks into a bar. The ceiling was ringed with dozens of TV’s, much like your average sports bar. Unlike your average sports bar however, the TV’s were not featuring athletic competition. That is unless you consider vigorous and explicit gay sex between men hung like Tijuana mules to be a sport.

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Two men are talking at a bar. They both order the same drink but are charged different prices. Angered, one of them men confronts the bartender. A fight breaks out and the bartender is seriously injured.

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why couldn't three people walk? they were a part of the human centipede.

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Why could the kid not finish his homework? Because it flew out the window on the way to his parents funeral

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Why was Osama Bin Laden so hard to find? His hiding place was difficult to come across.

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How many jews does it take to stop hitler. no one knows they didn't

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One time, I saw this guy on stilts and thought it would be hilarious if someone pushed him over. Then some guy pushed him over and broke his neck.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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