How do you get a clown off a swing? You kill him with an axe

watch me nae nae

how do you make a baby float? you take your foot off its head

What has two legs? Half a cat

Whats worse than a suicide bomber? Hubcaps

Why are leprechauns so happy? The grass tickles their balls

A man and a prostitute walk into a bar. they have a few drinks then proceed to a hotel room where the man has sexual intercourse with the woman in exchange for money. The man then leaves while the woman stays in the hotel room and cries cause she hadn't achieved any of her dreams or life ambitions.

What did the college student say after he failed his test? He didn't say anything, he was a mute.

Yo Dawg, I heard You Like Kittens and Volcanoes... So, I threw Your Kitten In A Volcano.

Why are the British so uptight? I don't think they are.

Ron Paul for President!

What did the Priest say to the Rabbi? Nothing. The Priest was mute and the Rabbi was deaf.

Whats do Hispanics and Blacks have in common? They are both stereo-typically defined and thus the subject of many popular jokes.

Why was the Muslim crying? Because his brother got hit by a bus.

Why did the girl fall off her bike? Someone threw a piano at her.

How old am I? If you guessed correctly, you are psychic. If you guessed incorrectly, I will send flying gnomes to capture and torture you. Unless, of course, you are of a racial minority in which case nothing will happen to you because I am not racist. :P

Do you know whats funny? No do you know i was asking a question

25

baby loves lalma

What did the homeless man without legs and arms, get for Christmas? ... Cancer

What do u call a man who is smart. A lawyer/ genius/ smart man

Why do people like the number 69? Because some people have favorite numbers, and 69 is a number.

Q: How much does a hipster weigh? A: It varies largely by hipster, the same way it does with any other person.

Q: How do you make three atheists cry? A: Kill their families.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...