How do you get 2000 people to go to heaven? Blow up a school.

Knock Knock Who's there? I eat mop I eat mop who? That's strange, most American's don't eat poo I'm Asian

A women walks into a bar which is means she is pretty rich to be able to have a bar in her kitchen

"Knock knock." "Come in."

Why didn't peyton manning's grand mom call him after his game? She died of throat cancer 5 years ago

man 1 walks by man 2 man 1 says hey buddy whats up man 2 responds do i know you man 1 says no but i saw you seeing a movie on friday man 2 says oh cool but wasn't that movie great man 1 responds ya and man 1 and man 2 become best friends plus man 1 only liked man 2 because he was rich!!!

My friend Edward found a worm in his apple. Edward happened to be a lemur. Lemurs eat both plants and worms, so he ate them both.

Hey, I just met you... No, I'm your brother. You've known me for 30 years. You must have memory loss.

How do you fit four gays on a barstool? You turn it upside down

united we sit, cause we're fat

Wanna know how to confuse a black guy? Give him a friend chicken sandwich with mayo on it.

a person cries in the corner you go over to them and rape them

Eiiiiijajajaajaja EIIIIJAAAA

What's worse than a trash can of dead babies? The one at the bottom that has to eat it's way out.

There are 3 guys named:Poop, Shut up and Manners. They all were speeding down the street, they took a sharp turn and Poop fell out of the back. A cop pulled them over while Manners got out to go get Poop. The cop says, "whats your name." "Shut up." "No seriously whats your name." "Shut up" he says a little bit harsher. "Wheres your manners?" the cop says. "Back there picking up Poop."

Joe: Hey, why are your counters all red and your blender looks broken? Me: The same reason why Mrs. Johnson's baby is missing. ajl

What did the pickle say to the banana? Nothing both of thiese particular things are sentiment and incapable of producing words and or thoughts. Along with a diverse enough personality to be creative enough to even think about asking a question. If you thought otherwise,GO SEE A DOCTER. Having sentiment objects talk to you is not normal.

How many Jews does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Well, one must question: 1. How much the electrician knows when it comes to screwing in lightbulbs. 2. The amount of electricians present at the scene. 3. The type of equipment being used in the process. 4. The physical and mental stability of the electrician. The situation is solely dependent on the above factors.

Q: I have a bed, but never sleep, I have a mouth, but never speak. What am I? A: Stephen Hawking

So, I walked into my friends house and MAH DEDDEHS DECK was outside bruh

Roses are purple violets are green I am color blind shut up

Why did the chicken cross the road? If i knew, I'd tell you.

Two black men go inside a movie theater. They sit down and watch the movie.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To see his brother im dying of leukemia.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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