Q: What did Helen Keller say to the bartender? A: "I would like a bud lite please" it was a different Helen Kellar

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Q: What did Robin Williams say to the young boy? A: Nothing, He is dead

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What did the guy say when he came out of the closet? Where's my green shirt?

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A woman goes into a butchers with her baby. She says "I live a few doors down and my scales are broken, do you mind weighing my son?" The butcher takes the boy away and a short while later returns holding a dripping bag. "He's 17lbs two ounces" he informs her, as his colleague brings the boy to the counter safe and well.

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A van drives into a car. An hour earlier, the man who was driving the van walked into a bar.

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How do you fit 1000 Jews into a car? You can't. You'd need a much larger vehicle.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know, It's none of my business.

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So a clown walks up to you and asks, "What'll always STICK with you? The violent disposition of humanity."

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why did my BFF hate me?i called her an idiot on all the holidays including her birthday

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Two muffins are sitting on a counter. One muffin says to the other "hello." The other muffin says "Oh my god a talking muffin!"

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Roses are red,nuts are brown,skirts go up,pants go down,body to body, skin to skin, when its stiff, stick it in,the longer its in, the stronger it gets,it goes in dry, comes out wet, its comes out dripping and starts to sag Its not what you think its a...Teabag

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What happens when a fat guy falls ? Ohio has another earthquake.

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Justin Bieber.

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What is 6 plus 9? 15

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u are so............................................................................................................................................................................................gay

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Knock knock Who's there? No-one who??? *Silence*

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What did the commentor say when he saw the "waht's worse than finding a worm in your apple...the holocaust." joke? I am offended to your cruel referance to worms.

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Dick Cheney That's the joke

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A padawan walks into a bar. He is promptly ridiculed by his master for not minding his surroundings.

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Why did the Chinese man cross the road? To get to the Chinese restaurant.

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Why did Susie fall off the swing? She had no arms or legs. A.Knock knock B. Who's there? A.Not Susie

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Knock Knock. Ow! Why you hit me!?

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Why did Jay-Z rob a bank? Wait, nevermind. Jay-Z didn't rob a bank.

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The Tiarajudens is a Permian land-walrus.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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