Why didn't the busy San Francisco business man hear his alarm clock ring this morning? A nuclear bomb blast occurred 700 meters from his front door. The estimated blast radius was approximately 100 square miles. Naturally, his alarm clock didn't make it.

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What did the taxi driver say when the black man got in to his taxi? Where to sir?

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roses are red and violets are blue and i was going to write something that rimes but that is not funny here.

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My new Muslim friend is the BOMB

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Did you hear about the couple that met in a revolving door? They died.

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On a scale of 1 to drunk how ten are you?

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Two guys walk into a bar; A Mexican and a Canadian. The Mexican guy says "Bartender, give me a 2 shots of Tequila, por favor". The Canadian guy says "Bartender, give me a shot of Club and a Molson, eh". They continue to drink until neither can feel the crippling pain of their mundane lives - then they each leave the bar, walk home and sleep alone.

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What is the best joke ever? 1D

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How do you find out a chinese's name? Ask him/her

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what do you call a kid with no arms and legs under a bus an ambulance, he's obviously in pain

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A kid with no arms or legs is stuck in the desert. Sucks to be him.

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Did you hear about the man who didn't get a burger with his meal?! Yes he is doing quite well on his diet don't you agree?

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An alien, a midget, and a Jew walk into a bar... I forget the rest but your mom's a whore

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so a black,Hispanic,chines,white and Asian man walk into a bar and they sat down had a couple drinks and had a good conversation and left as happy as could be

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Where can you find the best black man soup? I don't know. Cannibilism is no longer socially acceptable.

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Why did the Mexican cross the road? Because he needed to go to work to help pay for his dying daughter's cancer treatment

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A father had three children Rose Daisy and Cinderblock. Rose comes up to her father and asks"daddy why am i named Rose?' the father answered"well when you were a baby a rose petal fell on your head"Rose Reply's "oh thats nice" and walk's away. the Daisy comes up and ask's "Daddy! why am i named Daisy!" the Dad answered "well. when you were a baby a rose petal fell on your head" Daisy Replied" oh ok i guess" and walked away. Then Cinderblock came up and asked "duuuhhhd" and the father simply replied" Shut up Cinderblock".

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What happened when the man rubbed the magical lamp? Nothing.

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A horse walks into a bar, the bar tender says: why the long face? Horse: I have cancer

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What did the douche bag get for Christmas? Your girlfriend.

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What do you call a black person who has fallen? an ambulance

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whats long and black on a black guy slavery

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Why did a little kid's mom let go of his hand? John Wilks Booth shot her

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What's the biggest difference between white and black people? the melanin levels in their skin.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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