How do you keep an extraordinary magician from performing his show? Replace his shampoo with battery acid

knock knock whos there guy with a gun guy with a gun who guy with a gun who just shot you dammit

What do you call a black cop? Officer.

whats worse then biting into an apple and finding a worm? A naked chinese man jumping out of your trunk to beat you with a crowbar.

Once upon a time There was an ugly barnacle He was so ugly That everyone died The end!

I have a sandwich and chips for lunch! But instead of a sandwich I have macaroni, and instead of chips I have no friends.

What would we do with out women? Die and then become extinct

haw are alligators and turtles simaler? They are both reptiles and carnavores and their speaces goes all the way back to the dinosoar ages

Mitt Romney for president.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding two worms in your apple.

A feminist walked into a bar and had her period

Q. How do you know when an asian has robbed your house?? A. Like any other thief, most of your expensive belongings will be gone it depends on duration of robbing and their morality

What is next?

I used to take arrows to the knee but then I didn't, for no particular reason.

A blond walks into McDonalds. She orders and leaves.

If you give a mouse a cookie... ...you're destroying its natural diet. It might die.

why did the football coach go to the bank? to make a deposit into his account

What do you call it when a blonde jumps off the Empire State Building without a parachute? Suicide.

What's the best part about having sex with twenty four year olds? There's twenty of them.

Why did robin get in the batmobile? Batman told him to

Nigel Farrage and the concept of UKIP.

Dani barton from bob chuckles

You have such a big heart (Girlfriend) The doctor's think dangerously so (Guy)

Why doed Dorris suffer from incontinence? A weiner dog punctured her bladder.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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