You in love with me? Like platonic? Fine, we will move operations elsewhere, you really got to tell me who you are working for someday.

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Pick a number between 2 and 8. Now multiply that number by 9. Now add the 2 digits of that answer together. (example 18 is 1+8) Now subtract that answer number by 5. Now choose the letter below that corresponds to that answer. 1 = A 2 = B 3 = C 4 = D 5 = E 6 = F Now pick a country that starts with that letter. Now pick an animal where the first letter of the animals name is the last letter of the country's name. Now think of a color where the first letter of the colors name is the last letter of the animals name. - - - - - - - - - - - - - - Are you thinking of an orange kangaroo from Denmark?

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If Santa and a Blonde woman jump off a building who hits the ground 1st? They both do due to Galileo's discovery of two objects with different masses but similar densities hit the ground at the same time.

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Whats gets stiff when you have sex with it? A dead body.

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What's funny? Women's rights.

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Why is 6 afraid of 7? 8, 9, 10

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What is big and wet and smells like mushrooms? A big wet mushroom.

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Roses are red violets are blue next thing you know my D*** is in you

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Stevie Wonder valentine: Roses are black, Violets are black, everything is black, I cant see shit!

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Knock knock. Get out!!

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two mexicans are in a car, who's driving one of the mexicans!!!

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How do Chinese people name their kids? They could look up a baby-names book, consult their family history, or make one up

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Why did you visit antijoke.com? Because you don't find real jokes funny.

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Shane Murchan is GAY ..... :L

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Roses are dead Violets are dead Im a bad gardener

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What did the pineapple say to the orange? Nothing; Neither a pineapple nor an orange contains the necessary muscles to produce speech.

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Set a firework off on her face.

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What did Chuck Norris say when he stubbed his toe? "Oh shit I stubbed my toe."

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you just lost the game

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How's a raven like a writing desk. you really are alice.

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What do you call a discrase of a living enviorment? African huts there so muddy

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what has small feet? a human being with a tiny proximity of feet matter.

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why is a squirrel called a squirrel? that's its name.

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What's worse then finding a worm in your apple? - Getting raped by an giant scorpion.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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