What should you do if a stranger picks you up? Politely request that he put you down.

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Who created Apple? Steve jobs.

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what do you call a cow with no legs? ground BEEF!!!!

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Fenestrade De Riguerto sat aloft his might horse Bentereuse and called for his brigadiers. At home his wife was opening a package. 2 minutes later a sound could be heard reverberating across the countryside. It was the invasion fleet from Denarus V wiping out humanity

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EVOLUTION OF MODERN SAYINGS 1 The Samurai: If at first you don't succeed, kill yourself. The British: If at first you don't succeed, give up The Americans: If at first you don't succeed, sue someone, then try again in hopes of a larger payout next time

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What do you call a guy sleeping with little boys? Michael Jackson

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Why don`t women need watches? Because in our modern society, there are many clocks in most locations.

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Q.What did the muffin say when the other muffin said, "How ya doin'?" A."HOLY CRAP A TALKING MUFFIN!"

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I have tuberculosis because Ebola is too mainstream.

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whats the difference between a can and a fish?they can both swim. exept for the can.

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A guy wanted to write a joke. He didn't.

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What's the difference between a joke and an anti joke Bananas

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What did one narwhal say to another Hi ;)

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What do you call an arab with a beard? How cares what his name is just shoot him!

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whats brown and rhymes with snoop? Dr. Dre

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What did the blue man say to the red lady? Do you want to make purple? -A.M.M

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Two muffins are put in an oven. One muffin turns to the other and says, "is it just me or is it getting hot in here?". The other muffin says,"HOLY CRAP!!!!! A TALKING MUFFIN!!!!".

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I love you. You love me. I killed you're family. No you're an orphan.

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What's the worst part about eating a vegetable? Putting her back in the wheel chair.

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Why wasn't the girl asked to the prom? Because she had cerebral palsy.

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What do you call a deer with no eyes? extremely unfortunate...

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Q:Why did the boy drop his ice cream? A: A terrorist threw a refrigerator at him then slapped the ice cream out of his hand

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How do you put an elephant in a fridge? Open the fridge door and place the elephant inside. How do you put a giraffe in a fridge? Open the fridge door, remove the elephant, and place the giraffe inside. There is a party at the zoo. All of the zoo animals attend, except one. Which one? The giraffe, because he is in the fridge.

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What type of food was the black guy eating? fruit, he is on a diet

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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