Why did the teenager write a joke on here? Because after hours of surfing this website and casually laughing at herself she realized she had no life and the only way to feel happy with her self would be submitting her own to here.

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A ninja walks into a bar the bartender asks "what would you like?" The ninja says "i'll have two green eyes" the bartender says "we dont have green eyes this is america" so the ninja is so mad that he goes home and brutally beats his wife with a spatula.

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Why did the old man fall down the stairs? Because he was on his wheelchair.

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How many Chinese men people does it take to screw in a light bulb? None. Anyone can screw in a light bulb, regardless of race or gender.

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How did the chef bake 20 muffins for the king? My name is Bob.

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What do you call a black man on a bike? Environmentally friendly.

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Doctor: Knock, Knock Patient: Who's there? Doctor: The interupting doctor Patient: The interruptin.... Doctor: You have aids.

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Freedom of Speech

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Why did the sloth cross the road To fuck your gay cousin

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Faith, Family, Friends, those are three words.

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Q: Who followed E.T.A Hoffman? A: ASAP Rocky. (ETA and ASAP are both time-based abbreviations, ETA meaning 'estimated time of arrival' and ASAP meaning 'as soon as possible'. Thus, ASAP can form a response to a requested ETA. Additional humour comes from the dissonant occupations of the two individuals: E.T.A Hoffman being a nineteenth century gothic author, and ASAP Rocky being a modern rapper.)

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a black man jumps in a pool.

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How scoops of ice cream does a n*gger get? 0.

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Why was the young black boy kicked out of his classroom? Because the manner of his actions were inexcusable.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven was a known serial killer.

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What's big and white and will kill you if it falls from a tree? Your mom.

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What was the first thing the mother did when her baby was born? Weep. The baby was a was a stillborn.

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What do 9 out of 10 people enjoy? gang rape

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What did the whale do when he was angry? He beached himself, causing a major ecological disaster and costing the beach community thousands of dollars to return him to the water.

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Fool me once, shame on you Fool me twice, shame on me Fool me 3 times, oh now you're just being a jerk

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Why did the car slow down? Becuase the driver pressed the break

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Yo momma stank so bad, she might have a serious vaginal infection. You should take her to the hospital.

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I have a really funny joke.

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a priest and a rabbi walk into a bar they are good friends and enjoy alcoholic beverages.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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