What did the Catholic Priest do to the 9-year-old boy? He ate him. The priest was actually Jeffery Dahmer.

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What did the blind man get for Christmas? Poison.

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What's worse than getting sockson your birthday? Getting cancer on your birthday.

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what did the homeless man get for Christmas? RAPED.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. Most poems rhyme, But his one doesn't.

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rose's are red violets are blue bernard is mine and yours too if you hurt him in any way i'll punch you in your face and make you gay Krissc

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What's funny about a blond, a brunette, and a red-head, drunk in a Cadillac? Everyone knows integration is a myth.

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* Why is this dog barking? * Because he's a dog, if he were a cat it would meow.

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How does Hitler tie his shoes? With little Nazis.

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why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't it tried but was hit by a truck at the halfway point.

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Q: What do a dead cat and a flower have in common. A: Nothing, just go away.

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There's two muffins in an oven, the first muffin says "Woah, it's really hot in here!". The second muffin says "Oh my God! A talking muffin!"

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Fuck her

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How did Justin Bieber die? He didn't. And we all need to stop making fun of that poor boy.

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Hold on, please hold on! I will explain, it is my name, but I don't know whats so wrong with it at all... Please give me five minutes, I need to use the bathroom, please don't go just yet, don't be mad at me, what have I done wrong now? I mean if you are gonna go to sleep or something please do not be upset with me.

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What's a golfer's favorite sandwich? Well, it depends on the golfer

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

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Sally bought a shakeweight. She is an alcoholic and is ruining her family.

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civil rights

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Q: What is the proper name for a female dog? A: Well there could be several names it could be a name on the collar in which case please look for the number so it can be returned to its owner. Another possibility is that it is a stray which you should either run for it could have a disease and you should just forget about the name then or take it in as your own and name it.

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what do you call a cat that looks like a lion 7

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What is brown and sticky? A lot of things are brown and sticky

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What's worse than a fake bomb? Do I really have to answer that?

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Why was the chimp late for his flight? Because chimps arent allowed through airport security.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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