Why did the chicken go to KFC? Because it was suicidal.

Whats worse than being out in the cold? Having cancer.

A father of 4 commits suicide. his kids celebrate shortly after.

whats the difference between a grape and an elephant? the grape is purple

Why are all teachers stupid? They´re not. Why would you say that?

Why did the homeless man kill his dog? Because a drunk rich guy said he'd pay him a hundred dollars if he did.

hey i just met you and this is crazy i just had bath salts your face looks tasty!

Hey, what’s your problem? I’m a Catholic whore currently enjoying congress out of wedlock with my black, Jewish boyfriend who works in a military abortion clinic. So, hail Satan, and have a lovely afternoon, madam. a.w. j.p.

How do you make a chicken fly? Throw it

Steering Wheel Face.

How do you kill a blonde? Repeatedly stab a knife into her jugular vein

What did the alcoholic do when he finished his beer? Opened another one.

A man walks into a bar. End of story.

knock knock whos there? a rapiest get in my van. ok, let me just get my purse

a man walks into a bar and dies

-How do you befriend Tom Hanks? -Kidnap his son

When life gives you melons, your probably dyslexic.

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Two men are waiting for the traffic light to cross the road. One looks at the other and says 'Hello!' The other replies 'Hello!'

How do you drown a blonde. Put a Scratch N Sniff at the bottom of a pool and tell her to sniff it.

Knock Knock. Erm, sorry to be weird, but can you perhaps use the doorbell, because it's new and has a novelty chime. I'm proud of it and get a little chuckle everytime it rings in the vain hope that, perhaps you, the visitor, may also find it entertaining. Who's there anyway?'

A man and a six year old boy are walking along a path through the woods on a moonless night. "Gee mister, I'm scared!" says the boy. "You're scared?" says the man. "I have to walk back alone!"

how do you own a ginger? you don't nobody wants them.

Why did the bunny give you a funny look? It has epilepsy.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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