Sugar is sweet. Plums are too. Prison rape isn't funny either.

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What happen to the boy who poured water on his head? He got wet.

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The Aristocrats

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Why did the old lady talk to a tree? She had Alzheimer's and was going to die.

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Kid: Mom I'm gonna dig a hole all the way to China! Mom: That's sweet but it's impossible dear. You'll get to tired after awhile to go any farther. Also, by any chance you did dig really deep, you would melt and die if you got the the center because the magma will kill you when you get to it. Alright son? Kid: What?

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womens rights

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YOU WONT GIVE THIS A THUMBS UP!!!! YOU WONT DO ITTTT

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because you touch yourself.

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A blonde is rowing a boat in a cornfield. While driving by, another blonde notices and pulls over and steps out of her car. She looks out and yells "You know, it's blondes like you that are giving us a bad name. If you weren't so far out, I would swim out there and beat the shit outta you!"

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A man walked into a bar. Ouch! He tripped over the little step at the entrance. But don't worry, he's not hurt, it just startled him for a second there. They should put a caution sign out front, somebody might get a serious injury. You can never be too safe, after all.

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so theres a plane, inside the plane are 500 solid bricks one falls out, how many are left? 499 What are the three steps to putting an elephant into a refrigirator? Open the fridge, put in the elephant, close the fridge. What are the four steps to putting a dear in the fridge? Open the fridge, take out the elephant, put in the deer and then shut the fridge. It's Simba's birthday, what animal isn't there? The deer. its still in the fridge. a lady is walking across a street, she suddenly falls to the ground why? Because the brick hit her in the face. (:

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A boy in Bible class was poking a girl in front of him with a pencil. Atfer, maybe ten minutes of this, she was asked "Sarah, what did Eve say to Adam after they had had twenty-seven children" The boy poked her with the pencil again. She stood up, and said "I think we have enough kids Adam."

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what kind of person screaws in a light blub........ a electrician

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A dyslexic man walks into a bra drinks a bear and leafs .....

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Knock knock! Who's there? ... There was no reply because the person who knocked was the mailman delivering a package, and he had a tight schedule so he couldn't stay around to chat.

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What is a slave fighting in a pit of Rome? Just a slave. Who cares?

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what did the boy say to the girl? make me a sandwich.

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What do you call a person that is green, wearing plaid, and standing next to you in the elevator? What ever their name is

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Chuck Norris' balls were so big that he went to the doctor to get them checked on and it was discovered that he had testicular cancer.

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What do you tell a woman with two black eyes? Nothing. She's already been told twice.

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What's poor and lives in Newry city council dump? Smelly mcD

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When is a door not a door? When it is thrown away. Then, it will likely decompose in a landfill or be recycled into another product. In either case, it will no longer be a door.

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Man who wrote "The Hokey Pokey" died. Hard part was getting him into the coffin. They put his left leg in and then the trouble started..

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A guy walks into a bar. The bartender says "Why the long face?" The guy didn't respond because he was deaf.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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