What got stolen from the poor boys house... Nothing, he was so poor that he couldn't even afford any thing

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Why did the child die? Natural causes.

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What did the mom tell her son who she caught masticating loudly? "Do it with your mouth closed!"

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What's worse than being killed? Reading these jokes.

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How did the blind man know when to open his parachute when he went skydiving? The leash went slack.

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why is 6 afraid of 7 ? because 7 is black.

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What's red and invisible? No tomatoes.

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Why is 6 scared of 9? Selena Gomez

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What's white and flies around ? A seagull. What's black and flies around ? A seagull in the darkness.

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There was a guy and a girl naked in bed, sleeping together. When they woke up they didn't remember the last 72 hours and wanted some questions answered, including Where am I? Who are you? What year is it? What's my name?

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Man walks into a gun store, buys a gun. The same man goes home and lives happily till he dies of cancer. His son takes the gun shots himself, survives then later dies of cancer.

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how do you put a giraffe in a fridge? open the door, put the giraffe in and close the door. how do you put an elephant in a fridge? open the door, take out the giraffe, put the elephant in and close the door. the lion king is holding a conference in the jungle and all the animals turn up except for one, which animal is missing? the elephant, it's in the fridge. you come across a river you need to cross, but it is infested with man-eating crocodiles, how to you cross the river without dying? just swim across, all the crocodiles are at the conference.

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I was raped the other day... I still did more work than the bitch

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What did the guy do with the tv remote? Turn on the tv

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Now I have been typing without even thinking about that, and you have been following me.

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Your MUM has aids :D LOL

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Q: What's blue and thrashes about on the floor? A: A blue plastic bag in the wind.

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What look likes a rocket, uses Mc Donalds wifi and takes off from Fairlawns Avenue Kevins House not instigating it was all Taggart

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Roses are red. Voilets are blue I'm Morgan Freeman and I CAN SMELL YOU...

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doctor: hey u ready to get home person: yea doctor: that sucks cause u have cancer

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Roses are grey Violets are grey I'm a dog

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How many pairs of underwear do I own? Seventy-nine.

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How come Jimmy didn't take his math test? Dead babies can't take math tests!

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Dude, you're playing call of duty by yourself and in last place...HOW IS THAT POSSIBLE!!??

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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