ur left leg is cristmas nd ur right leg is thanks giving can i vist

What did the Pornstar say to his wife? He concluded that a divorce was the way forward for both of them as, seeming as he was a pornstar, he was almost certainly having extra-maritial sexual intercourse, unhealthy for any working relationship.

How do you get a clown off a swing Hit it with an axe.

A man walks into a bar and orders a water. He then drinks his water and leaves. The following day he returns to the bar and again orders a water. He repeats this for many days until finally one day the bartender asks him why he comes every day to just drink water. The man replies, "Water is free. I got laid off from my job last week. Rough economy, you know." The bartender starts charging him for water, and the man becomes homeless.

Why did the chicken cross the road To get to the gay guys house Knock knock Who is there The chicken!!!!!!

what is black and white and read all over? A penguin in a blender

Q:Why did the chicken cross the road A:He didn't he was tortured then killed and turned into a sandwich that you can buy for the price of $1.00

Roses are red, Violets are blue, My farts stink, And so do you.

Why are black people so good at sports? They practice.

Whats faster that a Mexican with your TV? A speeding bullet.

Q: Why couldn't the man get laid? A: Women were afraid of his 7 testes and 4 penises.

Why did the audience leave disappointed? Low budget and poor directing.

So a man walks into a bar carrying a giant clock. One of his friends asks, "Hey, whats up with the clock?" His friend then responds, "A goddamned genie gave it to me, i can't take it anymore. Here take his lamp." The man decided to rub the lamp and thinks to himself, "Gee, I'm gonna wish for 1 million dollars." The genie comes out and asks the man, "What wish could i grant you today?" The man says, "I wish i could have 1 million dollars!!" The genie replies, "As you please." All of a sudden, a studded dog collar appears. Then another, and another. Soon there were 1 million dog collars in the bar. The man yells, "WHAT IS THIS?!?! I DIDNT WISH FOR 1 MILLION COLLARS!!!" His friend then replies, "I didn't wish for a giant clock either...."

What is a dog's favorite color? None,dogs have colorblindness.

Two men walk into a bar The first man says to the bartender: 'Can I have a glass of H2O?' The second man says: 'Can I have a glass of H2O too?' The Bartender gives them both glasses of water because he is not irresponsible to serve hydrogen peroxide in his bar.

Why did george washington not make it to the prom? because george washington is dead

What has a fiery tail and is mentally handicapped? Charetard.

Why did the dog die? He was old

-Is your refrigerator running? -Yes. -Just wondering.

Why didn't Timmy have a girlfriend ??? Because he's a Fruit bowl !

60+8.99999999=68.99999999 soo close

Rose are red, I dont give a shit. When I think of you, I play with my clit. :)

Sir, your wife is dead

Why did Jack got late to his date? Because he was playing Call of Duty and forgot about the time.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...