What happens when you throw a green rock into the Red Sea? It gets Wet.

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knock knock Who's there? Someone who wants to save you from the shitty dinner your lazy wife made.

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WELCOME TO THE SECRET BEYOND THE SIXTH SENSE! 1, Sound 2. sight 3.touch 4.Smell 5.Taste. 6.Balance? :(

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What happens when you walk by two black men? You walk by two black men.

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Why the kid can't get off the water? Because your feet is on his head

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Why is Bruce Wayne named Batman and Tim Drake named Robin? They wanted to hunt bats and robins whenever someone does something bad.

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My mother forgot to make me a sandwich today.

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How do you know when a bag of chips is stale? It is past the expiration date.

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How many women does it take to screw in a lightbulb? ...get back in the kitchen, I'm hungry

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What do you call a Mexican that sails a ship? A sailor

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Roses are black, Violets are black, and I'm blind .

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How much does a polar bear weigh? It depends, but most weigh around 775 to 1,200 pounds.

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What do you call a fucking idiotic douchebag with ebola? An ebloa paitent

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What do retards say when someone knocks on the door... NOBY HOME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!.....................and that concludes our moment of silence

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Why did the Jew run across the road? To get to the other side.

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A man walks into the doctor's office and says "Doc my leg really hurts when I poke it like this." The doctor replies, "Yes, that is a knife."

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Whats worse than 10 dead babies in the street? 11 babies in the street.

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What do you call an 8 year-old with no friends? A Sandy Hook survivor

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You can pick your ur nose u can pick ur friends u just can't pick ur friends nose.

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Pineapple.

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Two men walk into a bar The first man says to the bartender: 'Can I have a glass of H2O?' The second man says: 'Can I have a glass of H2O too?' The Bartender gives them both glasses of water because he is not irresponsible to serve hydrogen peroxide in his bar.

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Whats worse than spilling ketchup on your shirt? Getting hit by a bus

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are u black unlucky

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What if your name was Mr. David and the office called you down and you were wearing a dress?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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