What did one Platypus say to the other Platypus? Nothing, Platypuses can't talk. However, they are the only mammal to lay eggs.

A bear walks into a bar. Everyone evacuates as animal control safely asses the situation.

John Travolta goes to the supermarket..

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I suck at poems, Show me your tits.

Whats massive, long, hard, cold, and is blue? A penis in an ice cube.

Why does Mario wear coveralls? Because it makes practical sense for his full time job as a plumber.

Whats the difference between a corvette and a pile of dead babies? One is a specific type of sports car, and the other is a sad destruction of many young lives

what did the dog eat for dinner? food.

Yo momma is so ugly that shes been taking self acceptance classes for her very low self esteem which is only one of many side affects shes had from years of bad relationships and being told she was and infact still is horrifically ugly its a truly sad thing and being the child of her you should be ashamed that you have not worked to help raise her self esteem

Dead babies.

roses are red violets are blue i'm allergic to pollen achoo

I am Asian, I've seen the color blue, but God made a mistake, Asians are taller than you.

What do you call a flying Jew? Smoke

What's big, black and long? The line in KFC

why is liam baldy because his dad is too

What do you call a deer with no eyes? Anything you like, he's blind.

Knock Knock. Who's there? Paris. Paris who? Paris, France.

"You know what my motto in life is?" "No" "Oh, that's a shame."

-I thought the lesson had started? -It has

A man attempts to sign in to PlayStation Network... And succeeds, proceeding to enjoy the console's numerous award winning exclusive titles such as LittleBigPlanet and Uncharted 2, along with utilizing the system's Blu Ray capabilities and playing with his friends online in an abosolutely free network, on what many consider to be the superior console to the Xbox 360.

A man ordered tomato and basil, but received tomato with a man. the man's name is Basil!

An American almost walks into a store when he sees a Jew. The Jew was also about to walk into the store, So the american opens the door for him and says"Jew first."

Why did Susie fall off of the swing? She was hit by an asteroid.

Knock knock Who's there? *silence* WHO'S THERE? *silence* -Looks out window- Slenderman

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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