How many black people does it take to screw in a light bulb? I don't know, that's why I was asking.

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Why does your mom not love you.... Because she is not your real mom.

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What do you get a kid with no arms for Christmas? Hungry, Hungry Hippos.

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What's the worst way to die? Alone.

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What is big, grey, has 8 wheels, can fly, swim and walk. I dunno. Thats why I'm asking

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What does the young boy say to the gay man Hello Jacob, because he was raised to respect and treat gays equally

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whats funnier than a joke? A: a funnier joke

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Why is 6 scared of 7? Because last year, when 6 was going to the gas station, 7 approached him and said "gimme all your money or else I'll shoot you". 6 was so scared he ran away crying. About a few days later 6 spots 7 again and this time he was with 9. He said "yo 6! If you don't give me your money, im gonna do this to you!" and then 7 started biting and chewing 9 as if he was some kind of cannibal. 6 ran away and called the police. He told him that 7 ate 9.

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Were can you find a bag of meth?

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A cow went into a meadow and ate some grass. Some time later he wandered off.

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Roses are Red Violets are dog I'm Senile Flower tastes like frog.

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Q: Why does it take three Polacks to change a light bulb? A: Because they're so damn stupid.

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"So can we take the rest of the schoolday off?" the students asked. The teacher then asked: "Why?" The students explained: "Because some of us live far away and it's impossible to get through the masses of snow, especially if the snowfall continues like this." "Well, I can't give you time off, because the principal haven't said it has snowed enough just yet." he responded.

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why did the slytherin cross the road twice? ... because they are double-crossers.

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what's worse than dropping half your sandwich? Getting hit in the face with a sledgehammer

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That was slightly painful. I would appreciate it if you would stop such actions in the future

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Why did the dog kill the fish? He had no reason, he just wanted fish. What, you thought he had like, a vendetta? pssh your crazy

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Whats worse than finding a worm in an apple? Getting shot in the gut What's worse than that? Getting raped in the hole made by the bullet

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moonshine most none americans think its just when the moon shines we have another story

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What name do you call a woman who is pregnant? Her first name.

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What do you get when you cross isopropil alcohol,ammonia; dish detergent fluid, water, vinegar, and lemon oil? Window Cleaner.

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A horse walks into a bar, the barman says why the long face, the horse says, my dad died this morning.

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Why did Jake have a bad spring break? Because he got hit by a car and died

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Q: If a Hungarian boy grows up to be a very successful payroll manager and learns to love and hate, show compassion while firing someone, and how to re-image the entire white house's security system, how many pickles are in the doghouse? A: 17

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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