Roses are gray Violets are gray I'm colorblind.

thumb_up thumb_down +34

knock, knock... no one replies and it becomes obvious that no one is in the house.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why did Doris fall down the stairs? Because she was a stupid, uncoordinated old hag with no control over her bladder.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

why did the chicken cross the road? why do you care?

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Q: What do you call an elephant between two buildings? A: An elephant between two buildings, and the question of how the elephant got there

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Q: Why was the math book sad? A: Because he recently found out that his parents died in a tragic car accident.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What's red and looks like a bucket? A red bucket. What's blue and looks like a bucket? A red bucket in disguise.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

What does a black person use to chop a tree down? An Ask.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

a little girl is playing outside of her house when i man in a van approaches her and stops to ask if the girl will help him find his puppy and that he has some gandy. seeing as the girl has a great love for animals she gets in the van. the man and the little girl drive around until they find the puppy. the man is so overjoyed her rewards the girl with candy. he then drives her back to her house and she feels wonderful having helped the man find his puppy. the end.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

roses are grey, violets are grey, i'm colourblind and shit at poetry

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Why didn't the black man pay for his child support bills? He made some unwise financial decisions in the past and is working three part time jobs just to stay afloat.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

How many blondes does it take to change a light bulb? Well it depends how many of them can figure out the staircase.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust. What's worse than the Holocaust? Finding two worms in your apple.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why was the mohel touching the little boy's penis? Because that's his job!

thumb_up thumb_down -18

why did the cow say baaaaa ? it was a stupid cow

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Where's my tractor?

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Sarah Jessica Parker walks into a bar. Bartender asks her, "why the long face?". She tells him it's from her parent's genes.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Your momma is so fat, she should be concerned about her increased risk if a heart attack because of her poor eating habits.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

A cannibal wearing a sport coat, grey slacks, and a pink tie walks into a bar holding a duck in one hand, a chicken in the other, and chewing on a human arm. He is subsequently shot by one of the patrons. There's a concealed weapons law here.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What's green and has wheels? Grass. I lied about the wheels.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Roses are red, Violets are blue, when the bass droped, my balls did too.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Roses are red. Violets are blue. I'm chuck norris. And I approve of this message.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Yo mom is so stinky that when she gets in a room every one leaves the room

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Why was 6 afraid of seven? seven commited statitory rape on a younger 5, gang banged 8, murdered nine, was sent to jail for life, let out early for community service, and told 6 he was coming forhim 6 months later.... 6 commited suicide by jumping off a cliff his body was never found his family didnt get to say good bye thats why 6 is afraid of 7

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops