When life gives you lemons, That's physically impossible. Life cannot physically hand you lemons.

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What do you do with a dog that has no legs? Take him to the vet and have him put to sleep, it's the only humane thing to do.

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Who has fair skin, blonde hair and is African? Stefan.

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Where does a king keep his armies? In his sleevies

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Why didn't the skeleton cross the road? He lacked the required muscular, integumentary, and nervous systems required to do so (among other essential bodily systems).

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your momma's so stupid she shot herself

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Why did the man scream? He got his dick caught. In the zipper.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, my name is cartman, kyle you're a jew

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Why did seven eat nine? Because six was afraid of him.

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Every circle of friends has a "crazy one". If you can't figure out who the "crazy one" in your group is... Try harder. Either that or you are a terrible judge of character.

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The Christian prayed every night to God for a new bike. He kept it up for a year. Finally, he got a bike for his birthday.

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sweating like antoni with a girl

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Why did the man poop his pants. becuase he had to poop.

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This is a swimmer Joke. Chuck Norris once lapped a kid in the 50 free... LONG COURSE.

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What did the man on the moon say? ...Im on the moon.

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What do you call someone trying to be funny? An anti-comedian.

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Justin Bieber paid a donation to the anti-homosexual orginization.

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So this drunk guy pokes this girl. 4 months later she has a misscarrage

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Why did the girl fall off the swings? -because she had no arms

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Q: Why do blondes wear hoop earrings? A: Those that wear them think that said earrings positively accentuate their physical appearance.

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What did one rock say to the other rock? Nothing, rocks are inanimate objects, therefore rendering them unable to participate in the activity of speech.

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Why did Hellen Keller masturbate with her left hand? Because her right hand was tired.

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I Couldn't afford a hair cut... so i purpposely contracted HIV

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a black man is flying a plane what is his name Joe and the plane crashed and he died because I distracted him with this question

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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