What did Kermit the frog say at Jim Henson's funeral? Nothing.

What would you do for a Klondike bar? I'd go all the way to the store and buy one.

Your mom is so fat because she eats too much and is most likely incapable of controlling when to stop.

Q. What did the gay kid say to his group of straights? A. 10 dollars to the first one to tip over that little asian boy on the bike.

Why did Jonny commit suicide? Airplanes dont have feet.

What's worse than dropping an ice-cream cone? A dead baby. What's worse than a dead baby? Two dead babies. What's worse than two dead babies? The holocaust. What's worse than the holocaust? Dropping two ice-cream cones.

how do you find will smith in the snow? with rescue dogs

why did little johnny start choking? because somebody shoved a bag down his throat

whats black and yellow and screams? A bus full of black kids going over a cliff.

What's red, orange, yellow, green, blue, and purple? The Color Wheel.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Just kidding, it got hit by a car on the way to the other side.

Why did Steve Jobs die? Because he had cancer

Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 was a serial-rapist with links to the Black Dragon triad. Yee.

Prostate exam > Some of these Anti Jokes

What do you call a man named Mark? Mark

What do you call a white guy in a joke? The first joke to specify one of the people in the joke as one with Caucasian origin.

Q: What do you say to a person in a wheelchair who fall downs the stairs? A: Nothing because most likely they would take an elevator.

What do you call a bear. Rob.

Roses are red, Violets are glorious, Don't try to surprise Oscar Pistorius!

Roses are red, Violets are blue Poems don't have to rhyme

Why did grandma drop the dish? She had a heart attack and died, falling to the ground and thus bringing the plate with her to the floor.

How many Alzheimer's patients does it take to change a light bulb? To get to the other side -Tag

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What goes about 36 miles per hour and screams? A baby attached to a ceiling fan.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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