Why did the fish fly It didn't

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A grasshopper walks into a bar. The bartender says "Hey, we named a drink after you!". The grasshopper says "What, Dave?"

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Your mamma so fat she bungie jumped straight to hell

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Why DIDN'T the skeleton cross the road? ..He didn't have any private parts

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A homeless guy walked up to me and said "Any change?", to which I replied, "Nope, your still homeless". We laughed and laughed. The he stabbed me.

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What's a Gingers favorite drink? Coke!

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A man is in a bar with a drink A lorry driver comes into the bar and gulps down the guys drink and the guy starts crying the lorry driver says "dont cry ill buy you another" thee guy sas "it's not that today i woke up late for work and when i got there i got fired and then when i went to go home feeling depressed my car doesnt startand so i walk home and i find my wife in bed with the gardener and so i came here to die but you drank my poison"

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Why was the man weird... Stevie Wonder

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A black guy walks into a bar. Suddenly, the bar goes quite, the music turns off and everybody stares. It was a gay bar and the man was very good looking.

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Why did 12 people die when they went to see The Dark Knight Rises movie premiere? Because they were shot and bled profusely resulting in quick, painful death.

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Yo mammals so stupid, she's got AIDS!

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What's worse than HIV? AIDS -Bob Bobby

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A Japanese man walks into a bar, it collapses and then is demolished by a tsunami.

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whats stupid and gay all of my friends

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A squirrel walks up to a tree and says, " I forgot to store nuts for winter and now I am dead." Its funny because the squirrel gets dead.

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What is the difference between a pile of dead baby's and a Lamborghini I don't have a Lamborghini in my garage

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Whats invisable and smells like a apple? An invisable apple

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What's worse than a worm in your apple? A Holocaust in your apple.

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What did the little asian boy get for his birthday? To work for minimun wage making high quality shoes for greedy white people in North America who dont care about anybody but themselves.

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whats funnier than 24? your grammar, its more funny thank you.

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-What did the duck say to Federico Costa nearby the phonebox in a rainy day? -Quack

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Would you believe me if i said... ^^^^ You read that line wrong?

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Are you from Jamaica? 'Cause you're making me crazy! Are you from Haiti? I'm really sorry about all the disaster that's been happening there.

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What did the fat gypsy say to the attractive young woman aged twenty-five? I know you are probably not remotely interested in having sex with me, but I'm afraid that you have no choice due to the fact that I've locked all of the doors.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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