Timmy eats 32 cookies and eats 30 of them. What does he have? Type 2 Diabetes.

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On a scale of 1 to Kevin James, how much do you exercise?

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Once upon a time there was a young teenager who was bullied a lot. She died 100 years ago.

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Your Mama is so old, that she is probrably going to die pretty soon.

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What do you call a fat cat? Nothing if you are a good person

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Nothing if you heard a loud sound or something that was me dropping the phone, by accident, its busted, I will call you when and if all of your "facts" turn out to be true, Hey, had no idea my doppelganger would be so down to earth by the way, so I am sleepy, what about you?

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Poker Face

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What did the father give to his daughter? AIDS.

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Why did the submarine crash? Someone opened the window

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What is the difference between a seal and an armadillo? They are both aquatic animals, except for the armadillo.

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A husband and wife just had a baby, and he came out black.

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Why didn't the chef serve the black guy his food? Because he wasn't a waitor.

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

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What happened to the orphan? Who cares?

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, the holocaust didn't actually happen, besides I hate jews

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why did the jockey lose the horse race? he mistook his horse for Sara Jessica Parker

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Why did the chicken cross the street? K

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Why would the chicken cross a road

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My friend thought that an onion was the only food that could make you cry, so I threw a watermelon at his face.

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What did the fly say to the spider? Please, I have a wife and daughter.

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What do iPhones and Nokias have in common The nokia is indestructible. I lied about the iPhone

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What do you call a skeleton in a closet? The hide-and-seek champion.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have ADHD, Oh look a butterfly...

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The Holocaust.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops