Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she has no arms.

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Three women, a blonde a brunette and a readhead, jump out of an airplane without wearing parachutes. And this is why women should stay in the kitchen.

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whats worse than ur granny dying? uhhh...actually theres nothing is worse

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If at first you don't succeed, go kill yourself

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6

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What's worse than breaking your leg and not being able to walk? Breaking your neck because you will most likely not be able to walk from the high probability of being paralyzed for the rest of your life.

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What did andy say when he went down on burger nips? Welcome to the jungle

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What do you call a man wearing a hockey mask and holding a chainsaw? A Lumberjack, I lied about the hockey mask

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A man dies on the operating table and finds himself in front of the Pearly Gates. St Peter looks at him and says " You are having a hallucination due to all the drugs they have given you and because your brain releases chemicals when you die. I am not real and there is not heaven or a god." Upon resuscitation the man contemplates his hallucination and becomes an Atheist.

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Why did Dave stop going to the laundromat? Because he was a suicide bomber.

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ARE YOU OKAY? Well thanks for asking actually I could be doing a bit better bu... BUSTER WOLF! Moral: No Im adding moral here, I mean why ask people if they are feeling okay before you break then in half?

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Why did the chicken cross the road?

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What do you think when you see an asian woman behind the wheel of a car? She's very attractive.

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What do you call a Jew on a rollercoaster? A Jew on a rollercoaster.

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Two blonds are driving to Disneyland. While there driving they see a sign "Disneyland: left" So they started crying and headed back home.

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What did the girl with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Raped

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I saw mommy kissing Santa Claus, the divorce papers were filed soon thereafter.

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conrad profit

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I used to think skyrim jokes were funny. Then I took an arrow to the knee.

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Yo momma is so average, she has to maintain her own facebook account...

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Why doesn't Helen Keller drive a car? Because she's dead

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Why didn't Lucas want to go down the slide? He was scared.

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Why did the all black baseball team beat the all white baseball team? Because the black team scored more runs than the white team.

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A baby seal walks into a club.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops