My zombie busting team: Tank: The Terminator Mechanic: Tony Stark Demolitions: Superman Medic: Gandalf Bait: Justin Bieber

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Why are hurricanes named after women? I don't know I was asking you

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whats something naked and nailed to a cross? jesus, idiot.

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If 1+1=2, then you must have passed first grade arithmetic.

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A Jew, a Russian, and a Turk walk into a bar. The Jew asks, "Can I get a glass of Manischewitz?" The bartender serves him. The Russian asks, "Can I get a shot of vodka?" The bartender serves him. The Turk then asks, "Can I get a Turkish coffee?" The bartender looks at him, confused, and says, "Sorry, but this is a bar. Unfortunately we don't serve coffee."

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Why did the blonde girl drink lots of water? Because the fat comments got to her and she changed her diet to nothing but water

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What is worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding Barney the purple dildo!

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What's better than winning a medal in the Special Olympics? Not being retarded.

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There's a Christian preist, Jesus, and a Jewish rabi on a boat. They want to go fishing, but they forgot the sunscreen, the bait, and the fishing line. The Christian preist walks across the water and goes and gets the Sunscreen. Jesus walks across the water and gets the bait. The Jewish rabi steps out of the boat and drowns. Jesus turns to the Priest and says, "Do you suppose we should have told about the underwater bridge?"

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whats worse than walking in to the doctors office and he says you got aids heaps of stuff can be worse but haha you got aids

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What happen when the man preposed to his girlfriend? He regretted for the rest or his life.

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Q:what did a keppy kid with a big nose say A:hi im josh Roberts

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Roses are red My name is Dave This poem makes no? sense Microwave

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why couldn't the girl watch t.v? Because her house burned down

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how does hitler drink soup ? with a spoon

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Why'd the girl drop her lollipop? She got hit by a bus.

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What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. Why should we know what he does, that is both weird and illegal. Stalking is a serious crime and should not be used. We do not know what he does on normal days, thus we cannot come to a conclusion to this question.

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Why did the parrot fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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why did the man have a hole in his face? because syphillis had eaten a hole in it

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A bear walks into a bar..... The bartender asks " what do you want?" , he gets killed by the bear because he started talking to it Made by eli

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whats worse than speaking with your mouth full? pooing with your mouth full

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A man is walking down the street and sees a women sat on the pavement crying, he walks over to her and asks "what's wrong?" to which the women replies "it doesn't matter" the women then walks away as she did not want to share private information with a stranger.

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why didn't the bully beat up the nerds? His mom got arrested for molestation and his dad got sent to Afganistan so he was too depressed to beat them up.

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Why was the multi-millionaire entreprenuer sad? He went bankrupt.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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