A Priest, a Rabbi, and Santa Claus are on a plane. This is impossible because Santa Claus does not exist.

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Roses Are Red Violets Are Blue If Beauty Exits ... The Heck Are You?

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Why was Martin Luther King assassinated? Because he had a mustache.

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Those that want what is best for me, shall listen to me and do only whatever I want. Those that want ONLY what is best for me, underestimate me greatly. You who stand in the way if my will, claiming you want what is best for me, better move aside.

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A blonde, a redhead, and a brunette were driving on a highway. The redhead asked the brunette, who had the map, which was the next exit. The blonde was better with maps so she took it and announced where to go. They made the exit and enjoyed a nice lunch.

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whats purple and not a rapist barney, I lied about the rapist part

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Why didn't the policeman stop the bank robbery? He wasn't there

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Mark Twain, Jesus, and Bill Gates are sitting at a bar. Someone messed with the space time continuum again.

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Q: What do you call a Polish astronomer? A: Copernicus.

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Q: Why does Billy get bullied at school? A: Because he has Down's Syndrome

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A blind man walks into a book store. He asks if they have any books in Braille. The employee says "Yes! Many you haven't even seen before!"

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Chuck Norris shaves with his fists. That's why he still has a beard.

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How do you get a clown off a swing? You kill him with an axe

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Q: whats white and if it falls out of a tree it will kill you A:a fridge

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A Japanese man, a Canadian man and a French woman walk into a bar. They do not converse because they don't speak the same language.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. Chickens live on farms.

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Knock knock Who's there? Isabelle Isabelle who? Isabelle Williams Oh hi Isabelle come in

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what did the bull say when it got shot? nothing... its a bull

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Why'd Katie fall off the swing? She had no arms

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what do eagles and chetos have in common....... they both can fly except for the chetos

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How did the girl cross the road? --she didn't, she died trying because she was blind and didn't see the sign that said "Don't Walk"

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Knock Knock Who's There? Im Black Im Black Who Open The Door Now Pancakes Granted

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Q: Why did the Asian boy pass the math test? A: By studying with dedication to the field.

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How did Richard the lion heart get his name? From his parents.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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