I went to Nebraska and saw a dead squirrel

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Q: What happened when Bob the Super-mega-ultra man, in his hurry to return an item that was objectively proven to be hazardous to physically normal people, banged his head very hard against a wall of a random building that was located on his route of travel? A: He recieved a concussion and had to coalesce in bed for a long time in order to return back to his regular style of living. Bob was merely a nominal 'Super-mega-ultra' man. He gets hurt practically as easily as anyone else.

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the real mccoy

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Fat people.

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What do you call a kid with cancer? screwed

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A labrador, a chihuahua, and a great dane walk onto a bar. They are strays and were brought to the pound where they were more than likely put down or adopted.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't.

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What's black and white and red all over? A bleeding penguin.

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How many Jews can you fit in a Volkswagon? 2 in the front seat, 3 in the back.... and that's it because the holocaust never happened.

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Yo Mama so slow She can't run very fast.

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Q: What's gray and comes in gallons? A: Gray paint.

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"Hey Jeff, how are you?" "Yes."

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What's worse than being raped? Finding out it was your uncle.

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THIS IS an anti-joke.

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Q: Whats Red And Has Socks? A: An Apple, I Lied About The Socks..

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What's black and gets in trouble a lot? A dog with black fur that has not been well trained.

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? At age two, she contracted an illness that left her blind, deaf, unable to speak, and was considered backwards of intelligence. She lived in a dark and hopeless world of her own, rendering her unable to do anything, let alone drive.

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a person who will soon die of beeties

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We are lawyers

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Q: what do you call a bunch of dead accountants? A: the holacost.

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MRCANN YOUR A FUCKIN' CARROT LERN 2 FOCKIN SIT IN YER HOLE YA FUCKIN PLANT

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Why is 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 raped 9.

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you

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A seal walks into a club.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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