A man dies on the operating table and finds himself in front of the Pearly Gates. St Peter looks at him and says " You are having a hallucination due to all the drugs they have given you and because your brain releases chemicals when you die. I am not real and there is not heaven or a god." Upon resuscitation the man contemplates his hallucination and becomes an Atheist.

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Why did Dave stop going to the laundromat? Because he was a suicide bomber.

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ARE YOU OKAY? Well thanks for asking actually I could be doing a bit better bu... BUSTER WOLF! Moral: No Im adding moral here, I mean why ask people if they are feeling okay before you break then in half?

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Why did the chicken cross the road?

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What do you think when you see an asian woman behind the wheel of a car? She's very attractive.

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What do you call a Jew on a rollercoaster? A Jew on a rollercoaster.

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Two blonds are driving to Disneyland. While there driving they see a sign "Disneyland: left" So they started crying and headed back home.

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What did the girl with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Raped

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I saw mommy kissing Santa Claus, the divorce papers were filed soon thereafter.

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conrad profit

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I used to think skyrim jokes were funny. Then I took an arrow to the knee.

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Yo momma is so average, she has to maintain her own facebook account...

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Why doesn't Helen Keller drive a car? Because she's dead

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Why didn't Lucas want to go down the slide? He was scared.

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Why did the all black baseball team beat the all white baseball team? Because the black team scored more runs than the white team.

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A baby seal walks into a club.

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guys ive got a TANK under my house a septic tank

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Why do black people eat at KFC? Because KFC serves good food at reasonable prices.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a Muslim? -You can research and find several similarities and differences, but I will not go into detail about them.

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You are on a street. there are 4 houses, a red one, a blue one, a green one, and a white one. The red man lives in the red house, the blue man lives in the blue house. the green man lives in the green house. Who lives in the white house? The president

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Yo mama is so skinny, when she sits around the house, she sits comfortably in every chair. - Stephen Colbert

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what do you call a mexican baptism? a bean dip

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This is the worst anti-joke on the entire site. Just look at all the thumbs down!

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What is the difference between an Australian and an Ethiopian? One is from Australia the other is from Ethiopa

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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