Whats the difference between a dead baby and a corvette? I didn't get 20 years for owning a corvette.

All the kids at school we're playing soccer on a sunny day except Jenny, because she had a headache and didn't come to school that day

Do you have to make frequent trips to the bathroom? Do you have a weak or broken stream? Do you leave the bathroom feeling satisfied? Do your frequent trips to the bathroom interrupt everyday activities? Well you should take Lunesta and just sleep. Then you wouldn't have this problem.

What did the sleepy man say to his wife? I'm sleepy.

did you know helen keller had a dog? neither did she....

Don't worry about giving me your phone number, I'll just follow you home later.

What's brown and sticky? Anal

Yo mamma's so stupid, she dropped out of college.

69

What did the man say when he realized that he was late for work? "Shit, I'm late for work."

my friend died in a car crash, now i have no friends.

If my wife has got 6 oranges in one hand and 6 apples in the other hand, what has she got? No chance of stopping an uppercut.

What do you get when you fall in love? A guy with a pin to burst your bubble.

so a man goes to jurrasic park and sees two dinosaurs fighting. he shits himself.

what did the penguin say to the dodo bird. nothing because dodo birds have bin extinct for thousands of years and it is highly unlikely for a dodo bird to be saying anything to a penguin do to the fact they wouldn't be anywhere near each other and neither species can speak.

What did Super man say when the bullets didn't hurt him? That didn't hurt.

A person affected by Alzheimer's is asked a knock knock question- Knock Knock Who's there? Boo Wait what are we doing again?

Why did the black guy cross the road? His car was parked across the street.

Why did the Chicken cross the road? He didn't, the farm this chicken was on had fences bordering it to avoid this very situation.

What's green, yellow, and red? A traffic light

. . I am a whale

What do u call a beaner when he stands up 4 foot nothing

What did the iceberg say when Titanic crashed on it? "Yeah!"

im gonna sue mcdonalds i asked for a hamburger and it was a beef burger -_-

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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