Knock Knock, Who's There? Come in. Come in who? Your mom

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What do 9 out of 10 people like? Gang rape.

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Knock Knock! Who's there? Your landlord. I'm here to collect rent

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What's the difference between a Mexican and a T-Rex? There are certainly innumerable differences, but, in general, humans are vertebrates belonging to the Mammalia class, chiefly a member of the species Homo sapiens; dinosaurs are chiefly terrestrial, herbivorous or carnivorous reptiles from the extinct orders Saurischia and Ornithischia.

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A horse walks into the bar and says "why the long face?" The bartender replies "hey! I was supposed to say that!"

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People talk about how there grandparents was in the holocaust well my grandpa was to he died. How he fell off the guard tower.

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What is the difference between Harry Potter and a Jew? Harry Potter escapes the chamber.

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Whats worse than bitting into a apple and finding a worm? Being the worm who just lost nearly half his whole house because some jerk decided to eat an apple on the ground, whom after eating the apple destroyed the worms self-esteem by making the comparison to the worse thing possible. Or being raped by Zeus in the form of a worm.

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A man and woman walk into a funeral home. They are both very sad about the loss of their father who they loved dearly.

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Who won the race through the underpass, the black man or the polish man? The black man as he crossed the finish line several seconds earlier.

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Knock Knock Who is there? The IRS coming to take your house

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A man walks into a bar. The ceiling was ringed with dozens of TV’s, much like your average sports bar. Unlike your average sports bar however, the TV’s were not featuring athletic competition. That is unless you consider vigorous and explicit gay sex between men hung like Tijuana mules to be a sport.

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Two men are talking at a bar. They both order the same drink but are charged different prices. Angered, one of them men confronts the bartender. A fight breaks out and the bartender is seriously injured.

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why couldn't three people walk? they were a part of the human centipede.

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Why could the kid not finish his homework? Because it flew out the window on the way to his parents funeral

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Why was Osama Bin Laden so hard to find? His hiding place was difficult to come across.

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How many jews does it take to stop hitler. no one knows they didn't

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One time, I saw this guy on stilts and thought it would be hilarious if someone pushed him over. Then some guy pushed him over and broke his neck.

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What do you call a fish with no eyes? Amblyopsidae, or blindfish, commonly found in caves where they are well adapted to life in the dark.

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What do you call a black man with a Ph.D? Doctor.

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Paige

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Why did the boy give the girl flowers? Because her parents died in a car crash and he felt bad.

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Why couldn't Jenna play double dutch? Because she had no friends.

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An owl and a squirrel are sitting in a tree, watching a farmer go by. The owl turns to the squirrel and says nothing, because owls can't talk. The owl then eats the squirrel because it's a bird of prey.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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