Dogta I don got da aids yeah? Well Sigh... Man I am so sorry, I got the positive, and the uh.. Good news... Whats the good news? I hate you! Whats the positive news? You dont have teh aids.

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Three black guys walked into a bar. They all behaved very nicely, payed their bills and left when they where done.

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Why did Anakin tell Luke he was his father? Because honest people never lie

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Yo' Momma is so fat she weighs a lot!

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A man walks into a bar gets hurt and falls over

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Obama

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What's red and looks like blue paper? Red paper

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Your mother is so fat that she is highly likely to get heart disease and/or diabetes.

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how long is a chinese name. how long. yup.

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why did phil ruin the patio furniture? because he wasnt familiar with the grammar technique used

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Why can't Stephen Hawking run a marathon? Because it takes years of hard training to accomplish such a remarkable feat.

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Guess what? Chicken butt

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What does an elephant and a plum have in common? They are both purple... except for the elephant

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What do you call a bloody Jewish guy nailed to a piece of wood. Jesus

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9/11/01 walks into a bar

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weiner? balls

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Women's rights

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25

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Why did the Latino feel uncomfortable during anal, vaginal, and oral sex simultaneously? Because she was being raped by three men.

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Last Christmas, I gave you my heart, but the very next day, your body rejected the transplant and you died.

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A blonde walks into a salon and says "I would like to get my golden locks trimmed." The haircutter replies "surely, just sit yourself down in that chair over there and I'll be with you momentarily." The blonde walks to the chair and sits down. When the haircutter comes over he asks her, "would you please remove your headset, I can't cut your hair while they're on." She laughs at her forgetfulness and removes them obligingly.

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How to apply total justice 1: Kill all humans! Moral: "Why do I have to die while he gets to live? Nobody gets to live? Sounds fair and just to me!"

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What do Kim Kardashian, Paris Hilton, and Pamela Anderson all have in common? All of their last names end with an "n"

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A man sees another man sitting on a bench with a pickle in his ear. He asks the man "Why do you have a pickle in your ear?" The other man replies "What? I couldn't hear you because I have a pickle in my ear."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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