What's brown and smells like poop? A monkey.

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What did the dying boy get for Christmas? Presents

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Knock knock. Who's there? 9/11. 9/11 who? Oh my god, I thought you said you'd never forget.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? I threw a refrigerator at it

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A British man walks into a dental office.

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You smell just like a black person. With your nose.

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Why did the girl fall off of the swing? Because she didn't have any arms.

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knock knock. who's there? interrupting cow. interrupting cow wh... You mom's a whore.

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What do you call 1,000 lawyers at the bottom of the ocean? A horrible boating accident.

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Q: How much does it cost to have 50cent and Nickleback perform together? A: 45 cents, because its 50 cents, and you get a nickle back

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if a dinosaurs could talk, what would they say nothing their all dead

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What's worse than tripping over a tree root? The destruction of the ancient city of Pompeii in A.D. 79. Though tripping over a tree root may hurt and result in the victim bleeding profusely, we live in the 21st century and at any time can call a doctor using a cellular device called a phone. In A.D. 79, no technology in this category existed. People were overpowered by the rage of a mountain that they believed was a sign of the wrath of the heavens. People had to flee the city and a majority of them we killed by either inhaling to much smoke or other causes. This continued for over 18 hours. Therefore, the destruction of Pompeii is far worse than tripping over a tree root.

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Knock Knock! Who's there? Banana. Go away.

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Why shouldn't you hit a black guy on a bike? Because you would get charged with vehicular manslaughter and have the NAACP all up in your ass.

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Potassium? K.

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Fox News.

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whats the difference between a pizza and a Jew?... Nevermind, that was a stupid question.

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Poop

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Teacher: Billy what do you want to be when you grow up? Billy: A fireman! Teacher: Tommy what do you want to be when you grow up? Tommy: 9/11

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Question: Whats worse then getting hit by a bus? Answer: Getting hit by a train.

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What is the difference between a pumpkin and a dead baby? There are thousands of differences between a dead human and the fruit of a pumpkin plant. One of them is that I didn't choke my wife to death with a pumpkin. Another is that pumpkins have a stem.

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My dad

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What the small boy with no arms or legs get fro christmas???? cancer

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If life hands you lemons your probably hallucinating.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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