What do you do if a blond throw a grenade at you? Take the pin out and throw it back

Why did the chicken cross the road? Suicide.

Whats the difference between a black man and a pizza? A pizza is an inanimate object, while a black man is a person. racist F.u.c.k.

How do you fit 100 babies in a bucket? put them in a blender. How do you get them out? potato chips.

When life gives you skittles, throw them at random people and say "taste the freaking rainbow!"

Why did they bury the fireman on the east side of the green grassy hill, to the left of the old well, underneath the huge apple tree? Because he was dead.

What do you call a black man who gets in the car with a drunk woman? An unsafe, yet easily avoidable situation.

what did obama say when he lost his dog ? where the hell is my presidential dog !

How many kids does it take to fix a light bulb 5 1 to fix the light bulb and the others to get in the van

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: So it could get hit by a car, to prove that chickens have free will, and have every right to cross a road without any particualar reason.

What did the rednecks say when they saw the bat? Ma, I'm afraid this is the Myotis Sodalis, or Indian Bat. It is an endangered species. Thus, we cannot shoot it.

this is not a joke. jks

What's worse than shoveling dead babies??? Using a pitchfork...

What is worse than finding a dead baby in a dumpster? F*cking midgets

what do you call 10 dead babys lunch

A couple picks up a hitch-hiker with an ax on the side of the road. The hitch-hiker says "Thank you for the ride."

What wears a white robe and shines? A special boar.

Q. What do you call the person that graduated at the bottom of his medical department? A. Doctor

so your paddling up stream in a cement canoe, one wheel falls off. how many pancakes does it take to shingle a dog house? 46 cause bears dont like eggs.

Q:whats the difference between grass and a car? A:They all have wheels, except the grass

wheres binladin? at the bottom of the sea wanking over amy winehouse

These two guys walk into a bar. You'd think the second guy would've noticed it was there.

Why are Asians so good at math? because of their work ethic and determination to become the best at everything.rice.

Q: How much dirt is in a hole 3 by 6 by 2 feet? A: There's no dirt, it's a hole.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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