- Anti Joke

a black man and a squirrel get hit on two different roads what's the difference? well for starters theyre two different species. a squirrel is much smaller than a human and has his own mark on society. the man will be missed dearly by his family and if the impact with the car wasnt bad, he may have a chance to make it out alive at the hospital. the squirrel however is not so lucky. it will be left to die on the street or would have died on impact already with sadly no squirrel hospital to tend to it.

Little Timmy walked up to the teacher and asked her "Can i go to the restroom?" The teacher said " I don't know, CAN you ?" Little Timmy said "When I was using "can" I was using its secondary model form as a verbal modifier asking for permission, as opposed to expressing an ability. I thought since you were a teacher you'd know that. My bad. MAY I use the restroom?"

A black guy walks out of a house with a t.v. He proceeds to put it into a moving van and moves into his new house.

Roses are red violets are blue I have altimers cheese on toast Srry bout the spelling. I couldn't REMEMBER!

What's flying and eats rocks? A flying rock eater

hi

Q: What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? A: "There goes my income. I dont know how I'll support my family now, or keep my crops alive."

What did the duck say when it walked into the house? This isn't where I live.

3 Blondes walk into a bar. One ducks, the other two are hospitalized with mild concussions

A: Ask me if I'm a tree. B: Are you a tree? A: psh, no! gives offended look and walks away

hi

What do you call an horse? A horse, because horse does not start with a vowel and that would be grammatically incorrect.

Why did Billy cry? He had Pubic Lice

What smells like marjuana and is black? A black man smoking weed

knock knock your gay

What did a boy dying from cancer get for Christmas? The news that his cancer progressed and he would soon die. He underwent a surgery that got rid of the cancer and he was cured. He ran out of the hospital in excitement and got hit by a bus. He recovered slowly, but lived. By this time it was June and his birthday, he returned to school later that year. He got called fat and committed suicide.

Alcoholic walks into a bar and then walks out because he promised his children and wife that he would straight out his life.

Last night I had the strangest dream. I was eating a big marshmallow and when I woke up this morning I had appendicitus

Whats 9 + 10? 19.

Knock knock! Who's there? Wristwatch! Wristwatch who? Orange ya glad I didn't say banana

Q: What do you call a dog with no arms or legs? A: A dog

A man walks into a bar so how many Jews were there when a man called Wellard ate a pizza. Balloons

A 65 year old man is tired with his life. He begins to realize that it is meaningless to him. He wants no part in the world anymore so he decided to commit suicide. On his way to commit suicide, he comes across a magical man that has an extraordinary offer. This magical man has offered to grant the 65 year old man the power to fly. The 65 year old man, accepts the offer in great interest, but the magical man wants something in return for his deed. The 65 year old man, offers all the money in his wallet to the magical man. The magical man accepts his offer of all the money and continues. With a flick of the wrist, the magical man says, "fly, fly, high as the sky, i grant this man the ability to fly". The 65 year old man is greatly excited now that he has the ability to fly. He cant wait to try out his new power. He runs to the nearest cliff and jumps. Too bad the "magical man" was really a male prostitute that was broke and homeless. The 65 year old man died on impact and the male prostitue walked away with a wallet full of cash.

What object do bananas look like? Bananas.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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