Whats worse than swinging a dead baby by a rope? Stopping it with a shovel.

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What has one head, three eyes and seven legs? A cow with a tri-pod rammed up it's arse. The third eye is a result of a birth defect.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Being hit by a plane.

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What do you call a black man running faster than a white man? Usain Bolt

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What's big long, harry, and has glowing eyes? I dont know. Its under my bed. PLEASE SEND HELP!!!

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"Doctor do i have aids?" asked the worried 13-year old.

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What do a Siamese cat and a birch tree have in common? Both exist.

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1-"What's the worst thing about a joke?" 2-"The stupid punchlines at the end" 1-"No-- when someone dies and can't live to tell it..." (laughter) 3-"What joke you guys laughing at." 2-"None of you're business" 3-"Damn I really wanted to know" 1-"Didn't we all."

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What did the young child with no arms and legs get for christmas? A bike.

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What did the robot do when a person was shot? Nothing, it wasn't programmed for that situation.

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Why are women bad drivers? -There are no roads in between the bedroom and the kitchen.

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Women's rights

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Take sebastian deep into the woods and put him down quickly

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3 guys were caught trespassing in a field and were sent to jail. The cop asked the first guy, "What were you doing in the field? He replied, "I was blowing bubbles" The cop asked the second guy, "What were you doing in the field?" He replied, "I was blowing bubbles" The cop then asked the third guy, "Lemme guess, you were blowing bubbles too? The guy replied, "No silly, I am Bubbles!"

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anti jokes are like dogs They both rhyme with Maths

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what do all 21 year olds have in common? there all 21

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have Ebola, You're going to die.

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What is purple and flies? A purple plane.

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Your mothers so dumb that when she had to take a math test, she received a significantly lower grade than the rest of her classmates.

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Why is Michael Jackson a bad chess player? Because he's dead.

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Why does mcguigan get made fun of ? Because he is gay with Jack Walsh

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A Black man, and Jewish man, and a Asian man walk into a bar. They then proceed to buy a drink, leave the bar, and move on with their day.

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What do you call a woman not in the kitchen? Her name.

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I have sex daily, I mean dyslexia.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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