I bought a pound of gold for my new gold ring, later that day I lost it

How long does it take jimmy hoffa to screw in a light bulb? A: Jimmy Hoffa is dead and incapable of screwing in a light bulb, however if you change the tense of the question to "how long WOULD Jimmy Hoffa HAVE TAKEN to screw in a light bulb" then the approximate answer would be around 1 1/2 minutes if Mr Hoffa had proper dexterity an motor control that was comparable to the average human.

Why does Shelby Like Pandora? Because she prefers rap and hip hop music and Pandora helps select songs for her to listen to according to her interests.

whats funner than nailing a baby to a wall, ripping it off

Why can't Helen Keller drive? She's dead.

What did the little boy with cancer get for Christmas? Death

Q: How do you drown a black guy? A: Hold his head underwater and sit on his back.

Q-How do you kill an elephant? A- An elephant gun Q- How do you kill a blue elephant? A- A blue elephant gun Q- How do you kill a red elephant? A- Strangle it until it turns blue then use a blue elephant gune Q- How do you kill a purple elephant? A- Don't be ridiculous purple elephants don't exist

What do you call 100 dead lawyers at the bottom of the ocean? A weird kind of genocide.

When life gives you lemons, Life isn't actually a person so saying that would be irrelevant

A blind man walks into a bar and orders a beer. He has gotten used to being blind all his life.

Nock nock Who's there K K who? You forgot the K

Yo momma so old some said act ur age and she dies

What is brown and sticky? Syrup.

why should not women able to vote? because their stupid and should not vote at all

Whats green and smells like bacon................. Green bacon

Why did the black man cross the road? To get to the chicken!

What do you get when you cross a Poodle with a cupcake? Stop looking at these anti-jokes and get back to work.

roses are gay s is justin beber s are u justen beber eats crap

What do you get if you mix a Bulldog and a Shih Tzu? A new breed of dog.

When life gives you lemons.... Don't eat them, because you're probable hallucinating, and you don't know where they came from.

whats worst then geting a used condom put in your mouth geting wraped by mario then lugi

Why didn't the girl put on her mascara? Because she was too poor to buy any.

Q: What kind of bees make milk? A: None. Bees make honey, not milk.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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