What did the turtle say to the hare? Nothing. Animals can't speak.

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Why did the Mexican wait outside Home Depot all day? He was hoping to be hired as day-labor to provide for his family.

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A woman fell victim to nasty car accident. Her injuries were very grave. The doctors warned her family that she had two hours to live. She died two hours later.

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what is a vampires favorite dessert? a used tampon

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How do you kill a blonde? Kick her off a cliff.

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i wonder who made this website? a human

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How does a black man get a job? Through an interview.

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How do you get free money? Hire a black man to rob a bank.

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what will hit the ground first an apple or Obama The apple, obama was stopped by a rope

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Why did I call 87 yr old Jamie McMeanBully a douche bag? Because he's sterile

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why did the chicken cross the road? who cares?

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What's worse than finding mold on your cheese? Getting Raped

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69

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Why does the party start when Kesha walks in? Well, it's Kesha's party and it would be rude to be in her house having a party when she wasn't there.

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Jet fuel doesn't melt steel beams,heat does.

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Womens Sports

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Why does the cool aid man make it look so easy to break through? -To Get to The Other Side!!!!!!

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What has two thumbs and is very pale? A dead baby.

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Hey, I want to because you are really sweet and deserve it, and damn you are hot, but thats secondary in your case, in every case actually, otherwise I would just be doing it with meat whose soul and thoughts I hate/dislike/detest/etc, and that is not who I am. Once huh? I mean I said night/day/shower/breakfast table... Not so sure I can last for that long with a girl as hot and sweet as you for that long. Kidding, hey, best friend huh? Wow, I mean that`s really sweet, and you are really a special friend to me, but uh, to be honest, best friend? I barely know you... I hate this part of myself, I am blunt with that honesty thing, I may just have insulted you, but you know, I also need to be able to live with myself If I am going to enjoy life.

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A man walks in to a wooden door. He's blind.

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Q: What's the difference between sheetrock and drywall? A: nothing. It's just two names for the same thing.

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What is dark, funny looking, black, and rhymes with osama? A black lama.

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I wonder what happen to John? Oh John I know what happen to him. What happened to him then? He was playing on the bridge and fell off on accident. Is he okay? Damn women of coarse he is not okay!!!

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What is the difference between a horse? All the legs are of same length, especially the back ones.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops