Did you know that if you stacked enough elephants to reach from the earth to the moon, all those elephants would die?

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Why did the chicken cross the road? His whole family attempted to cross the road approximately 30 seconds earlier and were immediately struck by a moving vehicle traveling at 45 miles per hour. He crossed the road to try to comfort his family while they took their final breathes of life. The chicken was also not really a chicken but a man that had recently been laid off from his union job and came down with a disease that is considered uncurable by modern science.

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A woman is on an escalator, which stops, then she cries. Why? The escalator is in a hospital and stops because the power has failed. She was going to visit her husband who is on life support, which has now but out.

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Have you heartd about the blond that confused winow putty for KY jelly? Her windows fell out.

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What's brown and sticky? A stick. What's brown, sticky and crawls up your leg? A homesick poo.

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why wouldn't the printer print? because it had no ink.

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rose's are red, bananas are yellow, yo mama's so fat she jiggles like jello

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My friend said that onions are the only food that could make you cry. That was before I hit him with a watermelon.

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What did the tourist in Africa get? A souvenior.

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1.Knock Knock 2.Who's there? 1.Boo 2.Boo Wh- The second person realized that the first person was about to make him cry so he stabbed the first person. 2.Who's cryin now Son!

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How do you put 4 elephants inside a Volkswagen? You'd have to the change the interior design of the car and probably cut most of the roof. How do you put a Giraffe inside a Volkswagen? You ask her nicely to squeeze in between the four elephants...

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My zombie busting team: Tank: The Terminator Mechanic: Tony Stark Demolitions: Superman Medic: Gandalf Bait: Justin Bieber

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what type of cat has green feathers? a green-feathered cat.

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wanna here a dirty joke? Suree A white horse fell in a mud puddle dum dumdum dum duuuuuuummmm

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What do you call a drunk irishman? A cab.

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Got no dick? Then you're probably a girl.

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How do you leave a gay guy in suspense? How? ......................

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A pirate walks out of a bar. He drowns in a puddle.

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Your mam is so fat.

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What did the astronaut say to his girlfriend? I have AIDS.

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whats worse then finding a worm in your apple? this overused joke

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What's brown and rhymes with snoop? Dr.dre

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how did the little girl die cancer

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Knock, Knock. Who's there? Your family is dead. Your family is dead, who? Your family is dead.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops