An Englishman, Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar. They enjoy a few quiet drinks while watching a rugby match between Italy and France on the big screen, which is why they came into this particular bar. The Englishman hopes Italy will win, the Irishman is also supporting Italy while the Scotsman is up for France. France wins the match and the Scotsman says "Good game lads eh?" The others agree.

Knock Knock Who's there? Jehovah's Witnesses, can we have a moment of your time?

Q. You are driving a car. In front of you there is a camion driving at your same speed. Behind you there is a helicopter flying at your same speed at the ground level. On your left there is an ambulance driving at your same speed and on your right there is a ravine. How do you get out from this horrible situation? A. Get off the carousel.

If you don't get this joke, you're gay.

What did Sarah Palin say as she gazed to the West? "I really wish my daughter hadn't gotten pregnant."

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was hit by a fridge. Why did Sally fall off her bike? She was hit by a falling monkey and fridge.

Laura Pratz..

what happened when 3 had sex with 4? nothing numbers are not capable of sexual intercourse

Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have Ebola, You're going to die.

A duck walks into a bar. Animal control is promptly called and the duck is released into a nearby park.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I suck at poems, wanna f***.

Who won the race between the turtle and the hare? Well, odds are the two creatures wouldn't race given that animals do not speak. However, if they were, the hare would most likely win a land race because of its powerful legs and agility. However, if the turtle happened to be a seaturtle and the race took place underwater, our dear little beloved turtle would win, having the advantage over the rabbit.

a priest and a rabbi walk into a bar... they sit down, have a deep and meaningful conversation about theism, and don't really drink anything.

What happened to the peanut who went to New York City? He got a-salted

What kind of Juice do White supremacists Hate the most? Minute Maid.

How does a guy with no arms kill himself? It's called murder.

2 guys walk into a bar but the third one has known about what happens to the third guy but since he is reading this in a newspaper and his unaware of his surroundings he walks into the bar anyway and feels very foolish.

What do a Jew and a Vegan have in common? They both won't eat pork products.

What's the difference between a truckload of dead babies and a truckload of bowling balls? You can't unload the bowling balls with a pitchfork.

And the winner of Miss America 2050 is... Britney Spears!

GONNA

what do you call a rich, gay guy from Florida? Iron man

you know whats funny the letter Q

What's a dead baby look like? I don't know, I don't fap with my eyes open.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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