How do you kill a dumb blonde? Personally, I love stabbing them.

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How do you get a baby out of the blender? Pour it

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How do women learn to drive? Drivers ED.

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There are 4 people in a crashing plane, but there are only 3 parachutes. But, the teenage girl says she is depressed and cannot go on. The older woman breaks down into tears because she is reminded of her rough child hood. The two 21 year old twins start crying, too, because they were corrupted by their alcoholic father who would come home and abuse their family. As they were all crying, the two pilots and the flight attendant took the parachutes and jumped. The older woman realized she went to flight school when she was young so she took control. They were are happy and drank a little bit too much alcohol and got drunk. The pilot also drunk and crashed into a huge skyscraper. This catastrophe was later named 9/11.

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why wont chin ever take his hat off because his head will be cold

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How do you survive a snow storm? Kill yourself

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? She is both blind and deaf, and doing so would put others in danger.

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Q. Why did Sally fall off the swing? A. Because she had no arms Q. What smells like red paint and is blue? A. Blue Paint Knock Knock? Who's There NOT SALLY

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What did the homeless man get for christmas? NOTHING, he died.

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What did the caveman say to the dinosaurs, nothing dinosaurs are from the Triassic period 25 million years ago, while the origin of man came around 230000 years ago, so there would be a massive time difference and and would never seen each other.

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What do you call 12 black doctors in a dark room? 12 black doctors in a dark room.

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What's so funny about a heart attack? It's not kidney failure..

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A white guy, a mexican, and a terrorist each throw something out of airplane Then they realized it was a bad idea and karma gave them cancer because they may have hurt someone

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What's worse than being in the Holocaust? Dying in the Holocaust.

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So I said to the man "That's no banana, thats my wife!"

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Q: WHY DID GOD MAKE ASIANS? A: NO FREIKEN IDEA

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

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How do you drop a raw egg on to the floor without cracking it? Any way you want, it is very hard to crack concrete.

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Why did the penis cross the road? Because a man was humping the chicken

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What's Mackaulay Culkin's favorite salad dressing? Neverland Ranch.

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Three black men walk into a store at 2:00 in the morning, what happens next? They buy some snacks and leave.

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Why did the boy throw the clock out the window? He was tired of working for the man.

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What is Megan Fox's middle name? Denise

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What happens when you mix a platinum blond with a black kid? A young african-american child with un-naturally died hair.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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