How do you scare a little boy? You tell him everyone he loves was shot to death by you and then kick his guardian .

Hellen Keller

why did the chicken cross the road? To prove to the possum it can be done.

Do you know what a deaf guy says to a blind guy? God told me you'll see your path.

why cant sophie lifeguard safely because she cant swim that good

Why couldn't the blonde count to 70? because 69 was a mouth full:)

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead..

How many Norwegians does it take to change a light bulb? Only one. But all the replacements are high-tolerance, long-life and non-dimmable.

I SWEAR TO GOD I'M NOT GAY! But my boyfriend is. Love you, Jeff.

roses are red, violets are purple, sugar is sweet, and so are... hmmm...

So a priest and a rabbi walk into a bar. They order some wine and have an enjoyable evening.

knock, knock whos there? steve steve who? steve johnson hi steve

Roses are red Violets are blue If i gave a rats ass I'd worry about you

"Docter, docter, I think I have cancer!" "I don't really care."

Roses are black Violets are black Everything is black Because I'm blind

Knock knock, ... Little Timmy bursts into tears, Because his parents don't love him.

Why did the girl eat a sandwich? because she was thirsty

What do you call a german soldier? A Nazi

How Do You Solve A Impossible Math Question? You Dont. cause its impossible.

Adam is gay tom is here that's nice

What do you get when you cross a canary and a lawnmower? Nothing. A canary is a small bird, and a lawnmower is an inanimate object. Any procreation of this sort would likely produce no offspring.

What did the helicopter say? Aluminum-minum-minum-minum-minum-mum-mum-mum-mum-um-um-um-um

a dog jumping up and catching a frisbi

Why was bobby late for school? Because he drove off a bridge.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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