Why did the man drink the milk? Because he was a baby.

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Whats the hardest part of eating a vegetable? The wheelchair.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread

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What did the rich white student to the poor arabian teacher? good morning Mr.Stevenson.

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whats black, white, and red all over? your mum

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The only silverware Frank Lampard will be lifting this year is his mums urn.

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A man walks into a bar. It resulted in a concussion and 17 stitches.

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what do a pizza and a jew have in common? they both burn in an oven

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Yo mamas so fat that she slowly had developed obstructive sleep apnea syndrome and had died due to an obstruction of her upper airway while she was sleeping.

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Why was the lemon wearing a blue shirt? Because its red shirt was dirty.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Knock, Knock Who's there? Knock, Knock Knock, Knock who? Knock, Knock

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What do you call a blonde at the beach? A dipthong.

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What's big, red, and eats rocks? A big, red, rock eater.

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What's the different between a blond and a brunette? Blondes taste better when cut into small pieces and fried in a skillet.

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What's black and hangs from trees in my backyard? Nothing. Blackberries grow on bushes and I do not condone hate crimes.

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Why did the faggot cross the road? Because he was a faggot.

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No your aunties a joke

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you need 2 pple for this. Ask me if im a tree? Are you a tree? no

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HOLY SHIT BITCH!!!

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Whats worse than getting in a 30 MPH car accident? Getting in a 40 MPH car accident.

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? You shove her off the bed

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seven guys rob a bank, they share it in this ratio 2:2:2:4:2:5:2 who got the most money? you don't know

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Hey, Max!!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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