whats brown and falls out poop :) - haha

thumb_up thumb_down -18

why did the man sell the car and bought worse one? it' s his hoby to restore cars

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What is green, ugly and can't empty his bowels without exerting a tremendous amount of energy? A constipated, ugly, green thing.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Q: How do you kill a blonde? A: Put M&M's on the bottom of a pool, and tell her to arrange them in alphabetical order. By the time she starts to question this, the poison should be kicking in.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

How did the Pollack die? Cardiac arrest.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

What's the hardest part of eating a vegetable? The wheelchair.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

The

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Most poems rhyme, But this one doesn't.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Boy: "But I don't wanna visit Grandma!" Mother: "Shut up and keep digging."

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Whats black and can run fast? a panther.... racist

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Why did the baby start crying? Its mom slapped it in the face, causing permanent brain damage that would haunt it throughout its life.

thumb_up thumb_down

What's the different between jelly and jam? I can't jelly my penis up your butthole

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why didn't Johnny walk to school this week? He was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

A Russian man walks out of a bar looking very sober because he walked out of the bar sober.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Hello.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

why did helen keller fall down the stairs A; i pushed her

thumb_up thumb_down +23

how do you make the president cry ?? shoot his family !!

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What did the cow say to the other cow? Moo.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

How do you fit 100 dead babies in a box? A blender. How do you get them out? Tortilla Chips. hehehehehehe

thumb_up thumb_down +7

yo mamas so ugly.... everyone died. the end.

thumb_up thumb_down

whats long, black, and smells like shit? a big turd

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why does Billy Mays yell? He doesn't, he's dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What did the adverb say to the noun? Hopefully whale.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What do you call a dog with two tails? ...Depends what its name is.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops