What do you call a fat guy? A fata*s mothaf*cka

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "Why the long face"? The horse does not respond, because it is a horse and lacks any cognitive ability to speak or understand English. Instead, it becomes confused by its surroundings, takes a dump on the floor, and gallops out of the bar knocking a few tables over in the process.

Yo momma is so fat, when she wears a bathing suit, people are like, wow, that woman is fat.

What do you get if you cross a sheep with a kangaroo? Don't be ridiculous. First of all, scientifically this is near impossible and secondly, what use would a kangaroo with wool be? Sheepdogs would become obsolete and they would be a nightmare to shear. Imbecile.

Why did Paul Walker cross the road? He wasn't wearing his seatbelt.

Red are roses Blue are violets Dyslexic am I.

Where did Suzy go during the bombing? Everywhere

whats worse than a leaf in your bed? World hunger, global warming, the economy......

two hippo's were in the lake. The water was up to their eyes. What did one hippo say to the other? I don't know why but i keep thinking it's tuesday.

How do you drown a dumb blonde? Hold her underwater.

What is Hellen Keller's favorite movie? Around the block in 80 days.

What is purple, covered in pus, and squeals? A purple hippo with an infected scab yelling at the pain

roses are red violets are blue pornhub is down ya mums facebook will do

Whats the hardest thing to have sex with? a goldfish.

knock knock come in

What's orange and rhymes with parrot? Carrot

Whats worse than stubbing your toe? The Holocaust.

Hey! did you know Helen Keller had a dog? Neither did she...

Why was the dog barking... Because billy fell down the well

When is a Jew the sleepiest? Depends on the time really... some people sleep and wake up on different biological calendars.

Q: why did suzy fall off the swing? A: she had no arms. Knock knock. Q: who's there? A: not suzy!

Why did Gina laugh? Because something was funny.

What do you call a man with no arm or legs lying in front of a door? Idk, but how did he get there, and where is his aid to help him get out of this situation?

why'd the Chinese kid die how the hell should i now

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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