What did the guy say to the other guy? LOOK AT MY EYEBROWS!!!!!!!

Why did the man order fried chcken? I have twelve dead babies in my trunk.

whats the best way to burn calories? Set a fat kid on fire.

wats worse than gettin bitched at by ur mom? gettin raped by a giant scorpian n getting SUPER ULTRA MEGA AIDS

Whatever tomorrow brings, I'll be there. Just kidding because today brought terminal cancer.

A man walks into a bar. It resulted in a concussion and 17 stitches.

You're tall.

Q. Why couldn't the blind black guy read. A. He's Dead

Women are like fish. It's hard to tell when they are crying underwater.

Q: When is a door not a door? A: Before it has been asembled or after it has been taken down and no longer maintains the physical form of that which a door typically has.

Why can't Amy Winehouse sing? She's dead.

A priest, a rabbi, and a monk are standing near a cliff. They say that they are of the best religion. The priest jumps off the cliff and says "God save me", he dies. The rabbi says "Allah save me", he dies. The monk says "Buddha save me" he is saved, in relief he says "Oh thank God" he dies

Friend: Dude are you going to see the hunger games? Me: But i alreay seen it Friend: Dafuq? its not even out yet. Me: African children invented the hunger games. Friend: -.-

yo Dawg I heard you like dogs... So I sent yo ass to prison and got an NFL contract

A gorilla walks into a bar and order a banana martini. The bartender thinks this is a little peculiar and then becomes aware he is actually dreaming. He wakes up from his dream and begins to tell his wife about the ridiculous dream he had. His wife just ignores him, the man rolls over and begins to sob because he realizes his marriage is in shambles.

why did the monkey fall out of the tree? because it was dead.

Kid- "Where do babies come from?" Mom- (commits suicide)

TOYS TOYS TOYS IN THE ATTIC

my name is piare (peeair) because my balder is empty

Q: why are kittens so cute? A: because god created them that way. go fourth and enjoy kittens.

How can you tell that your friend just had sex with a blonde? The girl he just had sex with has blonde hair.

why did the chicken cross the road? i have no idea, i dont know what goes on in a chicken's brain. the better question would be why was a chicken loose in a city

why did the duck fall in the water? It got shot

Why did the airplane crash? The pilot had a stroke.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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