Knock Knock Whose there. Mike Mike seriously I told you to stop coming here or ill call the police But I just wanted to talk to you Ok thats it im calling the police

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a man walked into a bar "ouch"

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What was a hard time for people? the great depression

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how long does it take a meth-head to rob your flat? not long at all, and they'll take everything. they need to, it's an addiction

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ure mama's so fat

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How do you make money? Kill babies and sell them.

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The man goes to the doctor after just losing his job because his company went under because of the econmic crisis. His house is being foreclosed because without the money from his job he can't afford to pay for his house. His girlfriend also just left him because of recent conflicts about money and she was looking forward to having a family and with him jobless it was just out of the question. Man:"Doctor I could really use some good news" Doctor:"You have aids"

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my egg roll

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Q:What did the furry say to the other? A: Probably nothing, cant be easy speaking with a dick in your mouth...

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Why did the boy fall out of his high chair? I'm not sure.

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"Honey im home!" but his honey was dead on the floor along with his 3 kids.

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I used to be an adventurer like you...but then I was diagnosed with cancer.

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How many dollies does little Suzie have? Enough to kill 15 men

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a guy takes viatamins thinking they would help him be healthy he choked and then he died from choking on a jolly rancher

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There was once a family of termites. There was a Papa termite, a Mama termite, and a baby termite, called Motor. One day they reached a big fat log, and they decided they'd bore through. So first went Papa. Bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore...then out came Papa! Next came Mama. Bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore...then out came Mama! Last came Motor. Bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore...then out bored Motor!

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Hey I'm a poet and I didn't even realize that I was a poet

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A horse walks into a bar and the bartender says, "How'd you open the door?"

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I don't want to hear another joke about female hygiene, PERIOD! -Lets go Mets

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Stephen Hawking walks into a bar. Just kidding! Stephen Hawking doesn't drink.

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do you know cadbury choclate buttons? yeah, you know the white ones come out now, do you why? so the black kids can get there face dirty too

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who likes gay porn and has dirty littlesweeneys thathesticks up his hole? Jahn Willems

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What do you call a saxaphone playing unicorn, that's flying away to a distant planet on a penguin? a dream

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What rhymes with turtle? RAPE

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Why did the boy get teased? Because his name was spelt wrong (k)urtis

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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