How do you make a blonde go 'ewwwww'? Hand her a moose placenta.

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What's got two legs and bleeds a lot? Half a dog.

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Q: What's green, red, and covered in cookie crumbs? A: A dead girl scout.

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A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear, The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf." (props- Marty Smith)

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why did jim die? he had cancer why did jim have no hair? it started to fall out when he was 20 and now he is bald at 30 years old

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If a chicken and a taco cross a highway how many cats does it take to milk a turkey? Cactus cause the dog had two black eyes

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what do you call a black person who hated fried chicken? a vegetarian.

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A person from Singapore eats

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Q:What did a young Arnold Schwarzenegger say when his friends wanted to play a game pretending to be 18th century composers? A: "I'll be Mozart!"

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What do you call an anti joke that's not funny? Non-existent.

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What do you call a black man flying an airplane? A Pilot

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roses ar red violets ar blue i have aids

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If your falling up a ladder and your canoe runs out of gas, how many pancakes does it take to cover a dog houes? A. George Washington B. India C. Blue Answer: False

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what's blue and looks like a shirt? a blue shirt

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Wanna hear a joke? 9-11

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A man tells the bartender," A bar walks into a man..." The bartender says," What the hell? I think you've had enough"

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How did th-A fridge.

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Why did the koala fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second koala fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first koala. Why did the third koala fall out of the tree? He thought it was a game.

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Q:What did the robot say to the boy? A:Nothing the robot malfunctioned and started choking the boy, despite the towns best efforts they could not release the death grip on the boys throat, after the robot was done choking the boy it exploded killing 99% of the population in a 5 mile radius.

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Why'd the chicken cross the road? Dead Babies

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What do men and women have in common? no really what do they have in common

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. Blonds are cute and so are u.

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Why did the pedophile cross the road? To molest a child.

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Why did the chicken cross the road. Because the grocery store only sold pork

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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