What do you call a mix between a mexican and a octopus? Actually, at this moment in time it is physically and morrally impossible to do such a thing. Scientists have yet to find a way to split the genes and create a cross species. lol jk its called a moctapus.

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what did the palatiespussy say to the asain how many cocaines did i say was a black pankakkkke MMMFUUCCK NORDSTRUM(CUM)

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A man from timbuktu slept on a bed of nails. It was very uncomforable

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What do you do if you have a worm in your apple you throw it away

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A Priest, A Pedofile, and a Rapist walk into a bar. He Orders A Drink

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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Want to hear a joke? I'm sorry.

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How many black people does it take to change a light bulb? one.

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why did the man shoot himself in the foot? because he didnt have the safety on and he had no gun handling skills.

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yo mamma so fat when she seen a stop sigh she ate it

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why can't Hellen Keller hear? she is deaf.

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Why did the Polish man cross the road? Because the doctors was across the road, and he had a doctor appointment in five minutes time.

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I scream, you scream, we all scream for shit

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Why did the black man buy watermlons? Because a new local super market just opened and they were on sale.

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Two black people passed me in an alley at night...... They said hi

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Why do people hate Jews? Because there is nothing to like about them

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Sometimes I sit in the bath and pretend im a bubble

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Q: what did one guy say to another guy? A: I don't know!

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What has 4 legs and cant walk? A paralyzed dog

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Sometimes I wonder; why is that frisbee getting closer? Then it hits me. Someone just threw a frisbee at me.

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Relax, it simply would not be working out for you if your mother was nearby, you see, the subconcious is limited by the concious mind, so if your subconcious can detect your mother (or anyone but me nearby) your conscious mind goes "uh oh" and it stops. Oh, right, and considering you can still type, how about we increase the effect into... I dunno, six billion? Yeah six billion. Anyway, the next time you want to experience it, just poke your nose, and since we do not want you to poke your nose off, you only do it once and you can yourself decide when it ends, at this level you should not be able to type, but if you want to type you can of course turn it off.

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whats red white and blue? i dont know

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WELL YOU ARE ALL A ROOF. So pie, my dearest Adam. Like a butthole.

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How much cocaine did Charlie Sheen do? Enough to compromise his health and career

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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