what do you call a man with no arms or legs? handicapt

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Knock Knock Who's There? Hi, I'm just going through the neighborhood to let everyone know that women secretly enjoy being raped.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

What did the astronaut say to his girlfriend?

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What's white and can't climb a tree? A refridgerator What's white heavy and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you? A polar bear

thumb_up thumb_down +5

A man walks into his local store, he gets a basket and get a tin of beans, an apple, some kitchen rolls a bag of potatoes and an 8 pack of sausages. He walks to the checkout and the lady working asks him ''Are you single?'' He replies ''Yes, i am actually, how did you know?'' The lady then says ''Because your Ugly as Sin''

thumb_up thumb_down -17

vitamin c

thumb_up thumb_down +2

A women gets a call saying her only daughter is trapped inside a burning building. She runs as fast as she can too her car before she realizes... women can't drive due to their role in society, so she returned to the kitchen and continued to make her master's sandwhich.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Knock, Knock. Come in.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Your momma so fat.... She's at risk of cardiovascular disease. You should take her to a nutritionist.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

whats short and has spots? A mouse with the chicken pocks.

thumb_up thumb_down

I've got a great new 'Knock Knock Jock

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What happened to the blonde who walked up to the vending machine? She got a snack and went on with her day.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

A Christian asks god why there is so much pain and grief in the world. God does not exist.

thumb_up thumb_down -45

What did the coat say to the dog? Nothing, the coat was inanimate

thumb_up thumb_down -15

roses are red, violets are red, ive been shot in the eye with a pelet gun, please ,please help

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Whats black and white and red all over? My wife, i constantly beat her and I should probably be arrested for it if she didnt love me so much

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Knock, knock. Who's there? Kevin. Which? Kevin Smith or Kevin Johnson? Kevin Johnson. Oh ok, come in please.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Q: How do you make Helen Keller cry? A: Casually remind her that she is both blind and deaf.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

who was the alien over LA? adalia rose

thumb_up thumb_down

Nate has 32 candy bars. he eats 28 of them. What is he left with? 4 candy bars

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What happens when you mix breed a cat and a human?? .. you get arrested and get raped by your fellow prisoners DONT do it!

thumb_up thumb_down

Why did the black man steal purple kool-aid, chicken and watermelon? Because it was the birthday of his 8 year old daughter with autism and she loves purple kool-aid, chicken and watermelon and he was very poor and wanted to make his little girl happy for once.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why couldn't little Tiffany play kickball with the rest of the kids during recess? Tiffany is a pencil.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

"knock, knock" "who is there?" Gestapo

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops