A man walks into a bar, and says "ow."

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Me and a pig had sex, beastieality.

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Womens rights !

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We are unhappy, unfilled because we cannot complete our dream, it is always about us, then again, is wanting the best for others being selfish?

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Why was Joey bad at playing the trumpet? He had no fingers.

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....ZZzzzzz.....ZZzzzzz.....

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Yo mamma's so fat she attracts other matter with a force proportional to the product of their masses divided by the square of the distance.

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why did the girl smear penut butter on the road. To go with the trafic jam

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What's better than winning a gold medal at the Special Olympics? Not being retarded.

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Q. Why is the road black? A. One hundred million dollars!

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Q. On a scale of 1-100, how immature are you? A. 69.

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Never again, I have all the intel I need on you, you cost me a fucking eye, you think I would let go of that so easily? It hurts day and night, I have not slept in days, my fucking eyelid is torn right off, and while I use a fucking excuse for an eyepatch, I still have not gotten used to sleep without being able to shut both my eyes, I have a constant fever, you miss me, you are directly responsible for scaring my wife and fucking over my face. Deal with it, cry harder asshole. Moral: You step on my foot, I break off yours, you cost me an eye, you do not know whats waiting in line for you, I am going to make you beg me to let you die! Did you think I would warm up as quickly to something as irresponsible as you? And we do not know yet if you did this on purpose, we do not even live in the same fucking country, and I get assholes assaulting me again! What the hell have you done? If my wife had been here I would have been dead! Moral: I hope you got pets, I will skin them alive in front of your face!

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Why was the homeless man homeless? He lost his house in a terrible house fire, stretching throughout his apartment building, losing his much beloved wife and kids in the horrific accident.

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No, I don't have ADH...- Oh look, a butterfly!!

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don't take life to seriously nobody gets out alive

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What happens to a fish with no fin on the right side? It repeatedly swims in circle.

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What's black and white and red all over? Nothing.

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So I was flirting with a girl at a bar the other day when this huge black guy walks up and says "Hey honey". I realized that I still had some un-addressed prejudices in me as he shook my hand, pointed out that it was a mistake anyone could make, and introduced me to a girl he had met at the college he works at.

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What's the difference between a dead baby and my dinner??? Nothing...

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A blonde dies Lololol

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what do you get when you cross an ant with toni? ANTONI

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A black guy and a Mexican are in a car, who's driving? The taxi driver.

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Roses are black Violets are black Everything is black. I am blind.

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Q.If I have four apples and billy has 4 oranges, how many pancakes will fit on the roof. A. 3 because aliens like purple hats.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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