What's the difference between Rick Perry and a toaster? One is a republican presidential candidate, while the other is an electrical appliance.

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What did the scientist have to say about religion when he was asked by a local reporter? He said that it is a cultural system that creates powerful and long-lasting meaning, by establishing symbols that relate humanity to truths and values.

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Avery has crabs.

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A horse walks into a bar and the bartender asks "why the long face?". The horse replies "My wife is dying of terminal cancer."

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What did one wardrobe say to another wardrobe? Clothes.

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What do you call the white woman who bought kool-aid for a black man. a good friend.

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There is a tiger in front of you a lion behind you and a bear beside you what do you do? Get of the marry go round

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Roses are red Violets are blue You're a whore

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Why was the fat guy so sad? Because he knew he would die sooner or later, just like every other human being

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What's worse than getting AIDS? Nothing.

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why did the chicken cross the road? dunno. i wasnt there.

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A man walks into a bar and sees a depressed looking giraffe. The man says, “Why the long neck?” The giraffe responds, “That’s not the expression.”

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Where's Waldo? It is impractical to search for him because he's just going to get lost on another page once you find him. You assume he was murdered and get on with your life.

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Nathan Gooderson.

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What do you call a limbless woman on a beach? Sandy

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If a vegetarian only eats vegetables, then what does a humanitarian eat?

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There's a donut on a cruise ship and he goes up to the captain and he's like "hey captain can I drive the cruise ship" and the captain goes "nope, come back tomorrow" so the next day the donut goes up to the captain and says "hey captain can I drive the cruise ship" and the captain replies "nope, come back tomorrow" so the next day the donut goes up to the captain and he's like "hey captain can I drive the cruise ship" and the captain says "NO!" and throws him over board Theres a couple on the cruise ship and the man was going to have a romantic dinner with his girlfriend and propose. So he was showing his bestfriend (who was also on the cruise ship) the ring. But was he pulled it out the wind picked up and the ring fell over board. So the man was forced to have a romantic dinner with his girlfriend and couldn't propose. So they go to dinner and the both get crab. And when they open up the crab and guess what's in the crab?! Not the ring the donut!!!

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A man walks into a bar. Except it was a metal bar, like a pole. So he got hurt.

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Ain't idn't a word.

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Why did the boy yawn? Because he was tired.

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A black man walks into a bar. The bartender shoots him.

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What did the monkey say to the receptionist? Eiiiiijajajaajaja EIIIIJAAAA

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What does an elephant and a plum have in common? They are both purple... except for the elephant

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What did the white man do when he got a black eye? He thanked the gracious african-descented donor, and with a little luck he just might see his beautiful wife and kids again

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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