What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Frost bite.

You wanna hear a funny joke? Sorry, but I'm really not a funny guy. Not a comedian, you know.

What's hard when you eat a vegetable? The wheelchair.

KNOCK! KNOCK! who knocks like that? all my friends break the door down...oh alright then ill answer i guess WHO IS IT? THE REAPER oh s*** dude! [panic face] NO ONES HOME? "In other news tonight, 2 local men found murdered in their living rooms, after looking up common joke style called antee joke. Police say the door was smashed in an obvious sign of forced entry. They seem to have just mysteriously had sudden heart attacks and fainted. heh heh...hey nancy....why did the chicken cross the road? [=< heh heh" "y" "because he thouroughly enjoyed darting out into traffic" "HAHAHAHAHAHAHA *GASP!* X.x dead face "NANCY! NANCY!.....well in other OTHER news ive just murdered nancy, and thats no joke." *runs*

Why didn't the little asian kid go to his friends party? Because he wasnt invited.

An Asian Man Has His Eyes Wide Open

A black woman and a white woman are in a bar. They don't talk to each other though because they don't know each other. THE END.

Wood is brown...... Grass is green...... Now what color are roses?

what do you do when mrs curaba gets heated through a fridge at her so she can cool down

You're*

tea with milk?

What do you get when you eat all potatoes Their all gone

whats the diffference between pizza and a jew? burning a pizza makes me sad, burning a jew is worthy of a party!

It's a bird! No it's a plane! No you idiots, it's only a cloud.

Roses are red Violets are blue I love you so much That is a an example of the 2nd person and the identification of plants and their colors

A priest, a rabbi, and a buddhist monk walk into a bar. The bartender says " What are you drinking?"

Nothing if you heard a loud sound or something that was me dropping the phone, by accident, its busted, I will call you when and if all of your "facts" turn out to be true, Hey, had no idea my doppelganger would be so down to earth by the way, so I am sleepy, what about you?

What's the difference between Stevie Wonder and Kevin Bacon? There's none. Neither of them is a taxi driver.

A man walks into a bar and asks the bartender for 4 beers. The bartender replies, "One at a time, mate, will that work for you?" To which the man replies, "No", leaves, and drives his 1994 Toyota Corolla off of the road into the pit of a volcano.

Why did Martha Stewart's skin hurt? My friend has a skin condition :( and is dying, skin cancer is not something to make fun of.

What did the little girl get for christmas? her first period

What happened to the woman who walked down a dark alley way? She found a lolly.

You know what they say about people with big feet.......... They wear big shoes.

What's small and harmless, but deadly when thrown at high speeds? A baby.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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