Why was the black man in Jail? He works there as a correctional officer.

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The time and place do not matter because I'm a lesbian.

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Why was the 45 year old man crying? He shit his pants.

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What's brown and sticky? A stick.

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A little boy starts to be followed by a man in a large white van. They come across an intersection, the boy turns left, and the man turns right.

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A Muslim boards a plane with his three sons. Everything goes well, because most on the plane are racially tolerant.

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What is Bigfoots favorite food? Biscuits and Gravy.

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A horse walked into a bar. Animal control was immediately called and the horse was returned to it's original owner.

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What did the gay man say to the other gay man? “How was your day?“

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Does that doctor take insurance? No, the receptionist takes the insurance, the doctor takes your blood... Well actually, the nurse does that.

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Did you hear about the 2 car crash in a walmart parking lot? 50 mexicans died

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If Jonny has 300 pies and eats 299 pies what is left for Jonny? DIABETES

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Are you the only 10 I see? Because I'm blind.

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What is green and sticky and oozes up a kid's upper lip? A homesick booger.

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Have you ever seen Helen Keller's house? No. Neither did she.

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Patient: Doctor, I was cleaning my glass eye and accidentally swallowed it. Doctor: OK. Lean over and spread your legs. Patient: (Leans over and spreads his legs). Doctor: My God! This is the first time, in all my years of practice, that I've ever seen an asshole looking back at me!

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So a man walks into a bar and gets a drink, then a man walks up to him and tries to start a fight, the first man says, "No thanks" and walks home.

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what do you call a guy that looks exactly like Mario. Frank because thats his name.

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What's blue and can't sing? Blue.

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Yo momma's so fat she is now a sponsor for Jenny Craig after joining the program and loosing almost a 100 pounds. So I suppose she isn't too fat anymore.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Im tired Cheese on toast

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If April showers bring May flowers, what do May flowers bring? -Allergies.

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So a baby seal walks into a club.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he had legs.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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