Knock, knock. Who's there? A black Russian.

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A bar walks into a man

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Bob: "Knock knock." Gerald: "who's there?" Bob: "your worst nightmare." Gerald: "your worst nightmare who?" Bob kicks open the door, kills Gerald, ties up his wife, sells his kids to slavery, and burns his house down.

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why was the boy sad? because his penis was stapled to a coffee table

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A black man and a white woman walk into a bar and celebrate their interracial marriage anniversary over a couple of drinks and then call a cab to avoid driving while intoxicated

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A bloke runs into the bank, says to the girl "Stick 'em up!" She says "Righty-o, matey" and sellotapes his bollocks to the ceiling.

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whats gayer than 2 homosexuals? 3 homosexuals.

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how do you make a mailman mad? you sleep with his wife

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What's the opposite of fly? To not fly

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why did jimmy win the lottery? WAFFLE

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? Because she has no arms. Knock knock! Who's there? Not Suzie

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What did the guy say to the girl when she was on her knees? Stop playing with it put it in your mouth

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know, go ask the chicken.

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I'm not racist. Racism is a crime, and crime is for black people.

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Two muffins are sitting in an oven. One says to the other, "Boy, it's hot in here." The other muffin doesn't say anything because it is a muffin.

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a black man kills a family member of a mexican guy. the mexican guy goes to the police, what happens? The mexican guy gets deported back to his country after they realize that he was illegal

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A plane carrying an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman is destined to crash unless some weight is lost. First they drop the spare engine, but there is still too much weight. Then they drop the luggage, but still there is too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

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Why is it okay to have four cats? Because I said so.

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A local police officer pulls up to tell you something. Listen carefully: Three zebras have been spotted crossing the Mexican border. He goes into his truck, pulls out a can of marbles, peanut butter, seven velcro straps and a rhino horn covered in glitter. Your mission is simple: Kill the zebras using your equipment. You will be rewarded if you have enough peanut butter to make a sandwich after. Go now... Get it done.

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What is purple after you stroke it a lot? An eggplant

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What is the difference between a person of Mexican heritage and a park bench? One is a bench, the other is a human being.

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what is the best invention ever created ? ............ PORN !!!!

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Whats long hard and has seaman? A submarine!

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot lost control of the plane.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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