How do you stop a run-away bus? You sit down in the driver's seat and gently place your foot on the brake pedular and proceed to press it down. The brake pads, located in the calipers, will squeeze the brake discs and slow the bus eventually to stop at the crosswalk for the old lady accompanied by a young boy scout to cross the street and continue their wonderful lives.

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Who was the dinosaurs favorite NBA player? He didnt have one. Dinosaurs became extinct far before the NBA was established.

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Why did Captain Hook die? He wiped.

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roses are red violet are blu--- blue? violets are violet! weird, isn't it?

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Whats long,hard, and has c.u.m in ig? Cucumber....also my wiener

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Why'd the littler girl fall of the swing? because a drunk driver ran through the swing, the little girl was killed. he was later charged with manslaughter.

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A man and a woman have drunk, unprotected sex, and 9 months later, they have a beautiful baby girl. What did they call her? An accident.

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A duck walks up to a lemonade stand and he said to the man running the stand, "Hey! Got any grapes?" The man then realized he was hallucinating because ducks are unable to speak proper english.

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what did the home less man get for chrismas? cancer.

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Who's better than badboy? The holocaust.

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What looks like a rainbow but isn't seen in the sky? A drawing of a rainbow

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What is striped black and white? A prisoner in jail arrested for the murder and rape of a 7 year old child.

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The Chicken was crossing the road one afternoon, he was fined by a police officer for J walking He made it to the other side.

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What would be funny? Seeing justin beiber 's penis.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm not good at poems Nice tits

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What do you call someone who copies a previously posted anti-joke without doing any research to see if it has been posted before? a lazy good for nothing rectum licking testicle sucking gonad gobbling arse bandit with narcissism issues

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What separates man from animal? Divorce.

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A horse walks into a bar You have been reading so many anti jokes that you can actually anticipate the anti-joke punchline to this joke, because it is one of maybe 3 or 4.

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rabbits running in my bathroom!

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How do you know when there's a terrorist in an airport? There's a camel in the parking lot.

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why did the girl fall down someone threw four monkeys and a refrigerator at her

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My friend and I were telling jokes the other day. Ha said " I've run out of dead baby jokes!" to which I replied " I've run out of dead babies."

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What's the difference between a BMW and pile of dead babies? I don't have a BMW in my garage.

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yo momma is soo stupid when anyone says anything she say i don't understand .

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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