A Grape Soda inside a Chicken inside a Watermelon. Blackception.

A shark walks into a bar. The bartender asks someone to call animal control to remove the nearly-dead sea creature from his bar.

A: you have a strong arm. B: yea i work ou- A: you can master bate a whale.

What did the chicken say when it crossed the road? Nothing. Chickens can't talk.

If life throws you melons, either catch them or get out of he way to avoid injury.

What happened when the man was about to hug the sexiest person he ever saw in his life? He hit the mirror.

What is worse than 10 babies nailed to 1 tree? 1 baby nailed to 10 trees.

Why was timmy in the well? He had autism.

How did the dead baby cross the road? It was stapled to the leg of a chicken.

Whats the difference between a black man and a white man? Their skin color

What's worse than getting a jigsaw puzzle for your birthday? Slavery

Roses are red Violets are blue I suck at poems, nice tits

A duck walks into a bar and the bartender asks "What'll you have?" and the duck says "Quack". The bartender is then promptly fired and committed to the nearest mental institution for thinking that ducks can talk and order beer.

theres a fat guy

eloise dey.

Knock knock Who's there? Batman Batman who? Because he was

WTF THINKING: "If you are going trough hell go back to where the path to hell began just get the fuck out of there you stupid dumbass muddaf0cker" "If you feel life is pushing you five steps back for each one you go forward, just turn your fucking back to your goal and you will get there in no time" "Never ever ever ever ever give up" -Fucking inspiring when you just give up after a certain number of "evers" "IT IS BETTER TO REIGN IN HEAVEN THAN TO SERVE IN HEAVEN!" "I forgot the rest" Nero the ONLY moralman (Fuck Neronism and they copying my shit, I am the only psychopath animal theRAPIST in town! (Female animals only, you think I am a pervert or something? Be ashamed you perverted deviant!)

Have you seen the newest starwars? What movie? I mean that episode where stars fight... Will Smith vs Keanu Reeves? I am talking about the stars in the sky firing at each other! You know, those star pilots on planes... Flown by Will Smith and Keanu Reeves? BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM! (You heard that one in your head)

How can you tell if someones gay? You ask them.

What's red, black, and green all over? A dead black bear. Just no green.

Two cows are in a field one cow says moo the other cow say shit thats what i was gonna say

A teenage boy tells his family that he is gay. His mother says she had always known, and they accept him for who he is.

Your mamma's so fat she has diabetes and may die because she may not be able to loose enough weight to keep her blood sugar at a regulated number.

Once upon a time there was a man exercising, he pulled a muscle and had to have his heart removed. In other words, don't exercise. The end.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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