What d u tell Simba when he's moving to slow? Muvasa

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What did the man say to the bartender when he wanted a beer? Get me a beer.

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3 Chinese brothers (chu, bu, and fu) come to America and want to change there names. Chu becomes Chuck, Bu becomes Buck, and Fu becomes Tom because obscenities do not make acceptable names.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't it got run over on the way there.

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what does gum eat ? gum you idiot!

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whats gay and american? a gay american

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Knock knock Who's there? The Gestapo. Get in the van.

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Q-How do you kill an elephant? A- An elephant gun Q- How do you kill a blue elephant? A- A blue elephant gun Q- How do you kill a red elephant? A- Strangle it until it turns blue then use a blue elephant gune Q- How do you kill a purple elephant? A- Don't be ridiculous purple elephants don't exist

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what looks, smells, and sounds like red paint? blue paint, I lied about it being red

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why did the blond cross the road? she doesnt know either

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Why did the clam not like to share? The deep sea is a competitive environment, where survival of the fittest is prominent.

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What happened to the orphan when it walked to the park? He found his birth parents........but then they were killed by a crazy hobo and he was taken away and molested

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Knock Knock Who's there? The mailman The mailman who? How dumb are you?

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What did the dog say to the cat? Nothing.

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What did the Golden Retriever say when asked about the meaning of life? woof.

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What did the black boy get for Christmas? A bike his parents bought him.

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What did the fruit say when it was about to be sliced in half? Nothing, fruits cannot talk, duh.

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Siri, what is your definition of love? "Let me check on that...Here's what I've found." Google.com search = definition of love

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What is underneath Chuck Norris' Beard? His Chin

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A van drives into a car.

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A snake walks into a bar

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What did the bartender say to the black guy? hi there

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ask me if im poop are you poop? no that is impoible

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What's Brown and sticky? A stick!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops