What is big, white, and will kill you if it falls out of a tree? Donald Trump

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A deer looks at the ground and sees something strange. He wonders what it could be. A rabbit comes along and thinks the same. A badger promptly arrives after the rabbit and thinks the exact same. 4 seconds later they all get hit by a train.

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An impolite guy walks into a bar... and doesn't apologize to the bar.

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How does Batman's mother call him to dinner? She doesn't, she's dead.

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When's the worst time to use skin moisturizer? When you're a burn victim.

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What did the blind man say to his teacher? Nothing, blind people can't talk.

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What happened to the man who worshiped Satan when he died? He died.

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Yo momma's so poor, that when she went to the soup kitchen, she got food.

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Why was Jeremy slow? He wasnt fast.

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What's invisible and smells like a carrot? A rabbit's fart.

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What happened when the high school student had intercourse with his history teacher? orgasmic noises.

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why did Bernard have a bold because I ripped his Mohawk

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Why didn't the boy have any toes? - Because he did not have any legs.

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Titanic with will smith. Girl: I wont ever let go of you. Leo: Drowns. Smith: Move your fat ass over girl, there is like room for me and fifthy kids there yo! Me: Bitch if you need to float on a piece of wood where six of us could fit, im gonna drown you.

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If you share rice between 30 Africans what do they each have? Aids.

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why cant the porcupine marry the balloon? ...neither one can talk.. obviously.

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What did the carrot say when it was thrown out of an airplane? Nothing. It's a carrot.

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How do two porcupines make love? Well actually it's doubtful that porcupines feel higher emotions like love - they pretty much just mate for reproductive purposes.

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You're as useful as Baby P's dummy.

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Mary had a little lamb, But it couldn't stop her from being raped.

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What do you call a man with no arms, no legs, and only one eye? Dave.

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roses are red violets are blue i need a pee and so do u

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Why did God create Ebola? Because he hates us all.

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An Iraqi, an American and an Irishman get on a plane. They all enjoy the in-flight amenities, agree that the food was sub-standard and arrive at their destinations safely.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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