Jesse likes to jack off and lick the white stuff off of his balls and digest it

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Q. What do you call the person that graduated at the bottom of his medical department? A. Doctor

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What do you feel when you kill a terrorist? Recoil -USMC

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anti jokes aren't always funny on here

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If video games were peaceful. Man! You are so strait! That was so good man! GG.

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Two men walk into a bar.........ouch.

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what happend to the kid standing on a railway, he got hit by a train

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black people - basketball rednecks- nascar mexicans- soccer asians- uuuuuh I don't know can i get a hint

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Two Poles are walking down the street. One says "Look out, I think that's dog shit." The other man thanks him and avoids the excrement.

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have u been drinking cannabel soup because you........ahhhhh!!!!! why are you trying to eat me!

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What did Buzz say to Woody? A lot. There were 3 movies.

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A Jew walks into a bar........... he buys it.

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On her day off, a fully clothed stripper walks into a bar she's never been to before. The regulars turn their heads to see who has just walked in, then turn back to their own conversations.

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Q:what does jgjdhter hjldhgukrh mean A: it means something it is a real word

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Why couldn’t the bicycle stand up on its own? The kickstand was broken and the child whom of which owned the bicycle no longer had the need for training wheels.

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Why is Michael J Fox so good at using shake weights? Because he is motivated to stay in good physical shape.

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Where does Charlie Sheen Shop? Winners

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Knock knock Who's there? The police. Your husband has been killed in an accident.

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A man walks into a bar with a pack of Marlboros and promptly starts to light a cigarette. The bartender rushes over to stop him. "Hey! We don't allow smoking in here chump! Take it outside." The man replies with a big grin on his face. "Oh no sir. These ain't no ordinary cigarettes. My granddad gave me this pack a decade ago on his death bed." He pulls it out and shows the bartender 19 stale smokes. "He told me that any who took a single drag off any of them would have their biggest wish come true." the man recalled. The bartender had a perplexed look on his face and yelled "What the f*** are you talking about? Get out of here before I curb check your a**!" The man was then hastily escorted out by security. He then died 4 days later from autoerotic asphyxiation.

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What did the coconut say to the lizard? Nothing, the coconut fell off the tree and killed the lizard.

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Why was the boy in hospital? He fell off the bus and was run over by many cars.

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How many babies can you fit in a bottle? None, a bottle is too small

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If I was a backstabber, you would have been dead already, without me having anything to do with it in the first place, listen, we cannot change the world, those that control the media, control the world. And our role was the opposite, we wanted people to find their individual selves and put their talents for use for themselves and us, today the media tells people who they are, what they like, and what to eat and wear. None of us can do this, point zero is gone, its simply a matter of time, but if you want to try, I can do what I can, in hopes of delaying the inevitable.

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Why did the beach ball pop? Because it stepped on a sharp chocolate chip cookie!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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