this site is funny.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing set? Because she had no arms or legs. Knock knock. Whose there? Not Sally.

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Why can't Stevie Wonder read? Because he's black...

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Roses r Red Violets r Blue I'm schizophrenic So am i too!

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roses are green violets are red im shooting heroine into my head

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Yo mama so fat, she most likely wont live to 40

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Roses Are Red Violets Are Blue These are your Results You have Cancer

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A talent agency is giving auditions and is just about to rap it up when a family shows up. They reluctantly agree to their "brief" audition given that they had found no suitable talent that day. The routine starts with the father starting 6 chainsaws at once while simultaneously starting a juggling/lumberjacking routine. His beautiful wife proceeds to toss him additional chainsaws (as he continually throws them for dramatic effect) while also maintaining a hypnotizing dance which seems to drain your desire to leave from your very soul. The children take turns jumping in between the chainsaws while doing a silent replay of the movie, "Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon." After it plays out the father tosses the final chainsaw up in the air which lands standing straight, quivering in the dust of the studio. The studio manager says, "Why that's an AMAZING act!! I'll sign you right now! What do you call your act?" In response to which, the father ****s on his desk.

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Your momma is so fat that she decided to begin an exercise program and eat healthy and she lost weight.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Does this rag smell Like chloroform to you?

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What got stolen from the poor boys house... Nothing, he was so poor that he couldn't even afford any thing

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What's black and has been free since the 1700's? What? I don't know, i was asking you.

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Why did the monk shave his head? So he's more aerodynamic.

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What do you call a group of Mexicans crossing the U.S. border? A travel soccer team.

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a

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Why didn't the girl's ring fit? She had no fingers.

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I have your mom in bed just kidding, i killed her Then barried her

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A

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What's the difference between a baby and a watermelon? One splatters and makes a big red mark on the ground when dropped from a building. The other is a fruit.

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A blonde, brunette, and redhead find a cliff that is supposed to turn you into something which you exclaim upon leaping from the cliff. The brunette jumps off and exclaims: BIRD! She thus falls to her death on a ton of pointy rocks. The other two loot her corpse and walk away.

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Your best friend is different from a dead person. The best friend will die if you shoot him in the head but the dead person won't die, he's already dead.

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Q: what did 7 say to 11? A: weres every one else?

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why did the boy drop his ice cream cone? he got hit by a bus why was the little girl happy? because she found an icecream cone

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What did the kid with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Nothing, he died.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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