Simon Cowell's hair is real.

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Whats worse than a mother of 3 children, jumping off a bridge, smashing into the metal roof of a large car and dieing on impact? A mother of 3 children jumping off a bridge, smashes into the metal roof of a large car, survives,, becomes paralyzed, and has to explain to her children, why she is in a wheel chair for the rest of her life.

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Your friend is so gay that he isn't attracted to hot women

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Q: What do you call a black person living in the United States? A: An African American.

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yo mamma so fat that when she goes out in high heels she comes back in flip flops

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What do you call a bay that got run over by a train? Thomas

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How do you kill a jew? In a variety of destructive manners that are illegal and I would hope you would decide against.

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How many Jews does it take to screw in a light bulb? 1

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Why did the squirrel across the river upside down? So it could keep its nuts dry.

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I'm growing tired of all those ADD jokes. I have ADD, and I... ... what time is it?

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There are two eggs sitting in a carton in the refrigerator. The first egg says, "Sure is cold in here, eh?" The second egg replies, "Holy crap! A talking egg!"

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Why doesn't Michael Jackson play with my brother anymore? Because he's dead.

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YO momma is so fat she suffers from cardiovascular illnesses.

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why are you adopted? cause no one loved you.

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roses are red violets are blue count my five damn finger , and the third one is for you!!!!!!!!

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i tell you whats funny......... what? a fat sudanese man

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How do you kill a priest? Shoot him in the forehead.

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a horse walks into a barn

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When do you call 911? When you need help with do something that you either can't do alone or can't control

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What did the kid with turrets CHEESE! say to his mom.

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A man walks into a bar stark naked with a duck on his head. The bartender said "Dave, what's wrong?" The duck replies "Don't ask."

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A duck walks into a bar. The bartender asks the duck "What'll it be?" The duck doesn't respond because it's a duck and it can't talk.

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Why did the squirl eat the accorn? Because he enjoys it.

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Roses Are Potato, Violets Are Booze, Im Irish and i hate Jews.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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