Knock Knock? Who's there? Dr. Fishbourne Dr. Fishbourne? Yea, I've come to inform you that your son has committed suicide due to lack of parental care and love.

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How did the blind man know when to open his parachute when he went skydiving? The leash went slack.

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Is your refrigerator running? Yes. Okay

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my hand is a DOLPHIN!

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Teacher: Why did you fail this test? Student: Because the hamster that gives energy to my brain just died.

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Get off my porch.

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What's funnier than the Holocaust? Most things, as the Holocaust was a terrible tragedy.

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A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks what he'd like to drink. The man pulls out his gun, shoots the surprised bartender, and proceeds to execute all the patrons of the bar and finally commit suicide. A post-mortem identification of the man identifies him as a victim of childhood sexual abuse and a diagnosed schizophrenic. There is a nice funeral for all the victims and the media respectfully minimizes exposure of the event.

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A husband said to his wife, "If you want to have sex, stroke my penis one time. If you don't want to have sex, just say so and I will respect your decision, though I may be disappointed."

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Why didn't the scientist discover a cure for apathy? He simply lost interest in it.

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Why did the black guy get kicked out of the bar? He was riding a jack hammer

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How many babies does it take to paint a barn? It depends on how hard you throw them

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How do you stop a bus? Throw small children in front of it.

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Knock Knock Who's There? Bad-mannered Bad-mannered who? F*ck Off

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You are joking right?

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What do you call a man with no legs? A leg-less man.

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Knock, Knock Who's there? Joseph. Joseph who? Joseph Brown. Oh, hello Joseph! Why don't you come in? No thank you.

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A Quadriplegic walked into a bar,

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven brutally raped and murder six's parents whilst six hid in the closet and watched.

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There is a mom a dad and a son, they walk into the museum and the dad is in the bathroom.

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what do you call a martial arts instructor with a medical degree who's name is Richard? Craig... just kidding, Richard

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Once upon a time there was a man that was exercising and he pulled a muscle and had to have his arm removed. The end.

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A man walks into a bar and says "Ouch."

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Why can't Michael J. Fox draw a perfect circle? Because he's human.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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