Why did the baby die? Because you had sex with it when it was only 1 years old.

A platypus walks into a bar, and was the only mammal in the building capable of laying an egg.

What's the difference between a ferrari and a sack of babies? I don't have a ferrari in my garage.

Roses are red. Violets are red. Your garden's on fire.

what is the difference between a Ferrari and a bucket of dead babies......... I dont have a Ferrari in my garage

What's blue, white and red all over? Not a duck.

What's pink and fluffy? Pink fluff.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Well it's goal was to get to the other side however unfortunately a giant gorilla picked up a car; threw it at a nearby building causing it to collapse; setting off a massive explosion causing all of the buildings on that side of the street to collapse. As the whole other side of the street was covered in rubble making it impossible for the chicken to get to the other side, so the chicken decided to turn around and go home.

A man with a ski mask on enters a bank, he just came back from the slopes.

your momma's an antijoke

How's the weather? Good.

What did the blonde say to the brunette? I just ate a chicken panini.

why did suzie fall off the swing? because she had no arms.. knock, knock who's there? not suzie

What is a Mexican's favorite restaurant? While the term "Mexican" encompasses a wide range of individuals and individual predilections, the most common cibarious preference would likely be a food that is reminiscent of his or her homeland; that is, what we refer to as Mexican food. An authentic nearby joint sporting such provisions would likely be the most common preference, but, as this description can only be traced on the local scale, a specific restaurant that covers a wider range of locations would be a more appropriate answer. Among the top choices are Taco Time and Taco Del Mar.

Why is the apple mushy? Because a car ran over it.

your mom is so fat jesus couldnt even lift her spirits

Q: Why did the Westboro Baptist Church picket the gay marine’s funeral? A: Homosexuals are a plague sent by Satan to destroy the fabric of America.

You know whats funny? Things that aren't listed here.

I HATE EVERYTHING OMG PEOPLE SUCK BOYS SUCK IM TAKING MY RAGE OUT ON THE INTERNET FDJKNDLKXC

Knock, knock Who's there? The electrician And about bloody time too, you'd better come in.

What happened when the white man went to Nigiria? He turned gray.

2 guys shot up a morgue..... 13 bodies remain dead.

Man who wrote "The Hokey Pokey" died. Hard part was getting him into the coffin. They put his left leg in and then the trouble started..

What do you call a diving-board factory worker threatening to jump off the roof? Names.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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