The king has three daughters. One day, one of the daughters comes into his room and asks, "Father, why is my name Rose?" King replies,"well, a rose petal fell on your head when you were a baby." The next day, the second daughter comes into his room and asks,"Father, why is my name Tulip?" the king replies,"A tulip fell on your head when you were a bay." On the next day, the final daughter comes in and says, "BLAJSFUAGHASRAKKKKKK." The king says,"Shut up, Cinderblock."

What starts with an N and ends with R, that you wouldn't want to call a black person? Neighbor

what's big fat and hairy yo mamma

There's a skunk and a lawyer standing on the side of the road, what's the difference? There are tire marks infront of the skunk.

What's worse than being fat? Being gay

How did the blind man cross the road? With the use of a cane and a registered seeing eye dog

Brian: farts RJ: Who farted? Brian: Idk Why? Rj: Smells like sweet ass back here

Why did the man not go to church? He was an atheist.

Why was six afraid of seven? Seven looked angry and had a gun.

Two gay men in a hottub. They relaxed for about half an hour before getting out and going to the bed, where they fell asleep.

Why did little Sally fall off the swing? Because Sally has no arms. Knock knock! Who's there? Not Sally.

what is the difference between a dead baby and a trampoline? you take your shoes off before you jump on the trampoline.

Roses Are Red Violets Are Blue If I Had A Brick I Would Throw It At You

What do you call a gorilla with a banana in each ear? A gorilla with with a banana in each ear? Unless it has a name, then refer to it by it's name. be polite.

What is a life without options.... an optionless life

How many lemurs does it take to paint a wall? It depends on how hard you throw them.

What did the giraffe say to the other giraffe. Nothing, giraffes are animals and thus cannot speak

what is more funny than watching a baby fly in a circle at 100 mph stopping it with a shovel

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What do you call an asian man driving a plane? Nothing, you cannot drive a plane you can only fly it

Every sixty seconds in Africa... a minute passes - plz like to save Africa!

Why was the deaf boy crying at Christmas? He got an iPod.

teacher: who's going to pass english? students: us teacher: not you, i lied about the passing

Which is longer? A rope...

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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