What did the homicidal maniac say to his 13th victim? Nothing, she was dead at the time.

How can you tell if someone is a global warming alarmist? Their IQ on average is 10 points below normal

How many Mexicans does it take to cross the border? Don't answer, just think and laugh.

why did the monkey fall out of the tree? cause it was dead...

How do you stop a clown from smiling? Hit it with an axe!

What did one muffin say to the other muffin... Nothing they are muffins.

Knock, knock. Who's there? Warenth Gibson. Warenth Gibson who? Warenth Gibson. What part of that don't you get?

Anti-Joke.com Best thing since something better that preceded it.

Do you know what's fun about having sex with twenty-seven year-olds? There are twenty of them.

Why was the deaf boy crying at Christmas? He got an iPod.

Bob: "Knock knock." Gerald: "who's there?" Bob: "your worst nightmare." Gerald: "your worst nightmare who?" Bob kicks open the door, kills Gerald, ties up his wife, sells his kids to slavery, and burns his house down.

Why did Quinn yell at his group project partner? Because he hated him.

I wanted to burn alot of calories so i found a fat kid and set him on fire. :3

How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family

Why did the black man steal purple kool-aid, chicken and watermelon? Because it was the birthday of his 8 year old daughter with autism and she loves purple kool-aid, chicken and watermelon and he was very poor and wanted to make his little girl happy for once.

A homeless guy was walking along the beach when all of a sudden he see's what looked like to be magic genie's lamp so he pick the lamp up whipes it off then sells it for black tar herion.

What's 9+10 20+1-1-1+2-1-1+1-2+1

Thomas the Tank Engine could see Express up ahead on the tracks! His driver shut off steam and applied his brakes. Ahead of him Gordon groaned "Ohhhhh stop your train! Stop your train! His driver and fireman jumped out quickly. Thomas tried his very hardest and eventually found himself slowing down. But there wasn't enough time and Thomas smashed right into the express. Seven people were killed and Thomas himself was smashed to pieces.

what black and white and read all over? a woman who has just been beaten and raped covered in semen.

Hamsters are a lot like cigarettes. They're completely harmless until you put one in your mouth and light it on fire.

A man walked into a bar. That must have really hurt him.

Q: What Would You Call Someone Who is 6 Foot and hairy. Answer: By His Or Her Name.

What did the girl with no eyes say? I can not see.

Why did the black guy have a bunch of marihuana? He was the owner of a shop that sold it for medical purposes.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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