Whats worse then walking into a door? getting shot in the head by a 10ft squirrel holding 44.magnum and a slice of cheese in the other

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Why did the Mexican guy run to the hospital? Because it was faster than walking.

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Q:What is your maturity on a scale of 1 to 100? A:69

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Why can't the T-rex clap? Because it's extinct

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That awkward moment were your giving your girlfriend a blowjob then you realize your giving your girlfriend a blowjob.

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whats better then 10 babies nailed to 1 tree... 1 baby nailed to 10 trees!

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What should you give your Italian plumber for a refreshment? Water, because he's probably working so hard that he's thirsty.

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Jack and Jill went up the hill, to fetch a pail of water. Jack fell down and broke his crown, and Jill came tumbling after. Up Jack got, and home did trot, as fast as he could caper, to old Dame Dob, who proceeded to get Jill convicted of attempted murder, as well as several millions of dollars for pain and suffering.

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How do you get a clown to stop smiling? Hit him with an ax.

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Three bitches walk into a bar, and die

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A chicken crosses the road... Gets fined for jaywalking.

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di you hear about the man that got his whole left side cut off? no well he died

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yo mama's so fat, we are all extremely concerned about her health

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Why was a group of children being driven away by a black man? Michael was the students bus driver, he was taking them to the zoo.

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You know what they say about people with big feet? Big shoes.

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Why did Batman brush his teeth? So he wouldn't get bat breath

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jimmy walked into a bar, then walked out crying and all desperate seeing his wife cheating on him with another guy sitting in the bar. he jumped in front of a bus and was taken to the hospital. He died due serious injuries. Turns out that it wasn't his wife but her twin sister that neither jimmy nor his wife was aware of her existence.

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What happens when a llama falls off a cliff? It dies.

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why did Max cry??? chicken

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What weights more than a 300 pound man? A 400 pound man.

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Hail Heetluh

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What mouse walks on 2 legs, Micky mouse. What duck walks on 2 legs, All ducks you dip shit.

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What do you do when someone tries to rob you at gunpoint Well first thing you have to do is think why am I in this situation? Then what can I do to avoid this again Finally think about how you're going to pay your medical bill. You were to busy thinking, to notice you just got shot and robbed.

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What's worse than 100 dead babies stapled to a wall? 100 live babies stapled to the wall!!!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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