In the attic lights Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Lights, voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Forget about them, do not compare yourself to those beneath you, you always wanted to help as many as possible, in a world where everyone fights for themselves only.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Knock knock. The door was not answered because, rather than rapping upon the door with his knuckles twice consecutively, Joseph simply said the onomatopoeia verbs vocally. He intended to wish his neighbor and dear friend of twenty years the best of luck with his current situation, as his neighbor had been recently divorced from a marriage of forty-eight years. Joseph then walked home, because intruding upon his friend's privacy would have befuddled him even further.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

have you ever heard of the mexican that went to college...no...oh me neither

thumb_up thumb_down -8

'knock knock' 'Who's there?" "the mailman, Ive got mail for you"

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Why was the boy sad? He had a frog stapled to his face.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

A Nazi walks into a bar. No one really knows he's a Nazi and he doesn't talk about it that much in public, so he chats to some people then leaves after a few beers...

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Whats the differnce between love and herpies Herpies last forever

thumb_up thumb_down +18

A: Knock Knock B: Who's there? A: The Police. We have a warrant for your arrest.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

One day three men died. Heaven had almost been full, and he wanted to see who could get in and who would burn. So the first man starts and says "well I just got home from my girlfriends house, she just dumped me. I was crazy mad, and as I was about to eat the pain away, I saw a man hanging off of my porch. I ran to the man pulled out a sledge hammer, and then smashed his hands off the balcony. And without thinking I picked up my refrigerator and threw it down at him. But sadly I fell with the refridgerator." the second man steps up and says.. "I was doing my dance routine on my porch, and I slipped on an ice cube and flipped off the rail. I took ahold of a railing on which I could puulmupmtomsaftey on, but as I was about to save my own life some psychotic man comes out with a sledge hammer and bashes my hands off the railing. After he threw his refridgerator down at me." and then the third guy says..."well I was in this refridgerator........."

thumb_up thumb_down +12

roses are read, violets are blue. i have alzheimers and Jill came tumbling down.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Is Barack Obama a dentist, a teacher, or the president of the United States? A dentist. He just happens to have the same name as the president.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What did the paper say to the pen? Nothing, they are inanimate objects!

thumb_up thumb_down -25

a burglar walks in a house the alarm goes off and the police come

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What happened when the turtle rolled over on his back? It proceeded to die because it couldnt find a way to roll over. An African tribe then decided to make the recently decised turtle into a delicious soup that lasted him and his family three days.

thumb_up thumb_down +62

How did the boy escape the burning building? He didn't. He burned and when to hell like everyone else.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why did the blonde flunk out of school? Because she was a fucking idiot.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

what does nike and the kkk have in common? Nothing as one is a brand of clothing ie;shoes, hoodies, etc. while the other is a racist cult formed in the 19th century which persecuted african americans.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Your dad is so gay, he does not have a girlfriend.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why was the unemployed dolphin trainer so sad? His life has no purpoise. In an unrelated topic, how is he unemployed id he is a dolphin trainer?

thumb_up thumb_down -10

How do you tell if your sister is on her period? Cause your dads dick tastes funny...

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why did the chicken cross the road? Cause he felt like it.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

roses are red, violets are blue.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What if your name was Mr. David and the office called you down and you were wearing a dress?

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops