What's the difference between a screwdriver and DJ Pauly D? One's a tool and one is an inanimate object.

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how many dead babys can fit in a bathtub 17

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How do you know when a bag of chips is stale? It is past the expiration date.

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Hello, I want likes. Press the up arrow.

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I have a crush on my dad.

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whats the difference between a pile of dead babies and a red corvette? i don't have a red corvette in my garage

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Why didn't little Jimmy eat his dinner? Jimmy didn't eat his dinner because there was no food. Jimmy is a poor street urchin who died of starvation.

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A duck walks into a bar. Animal control is notified, and the duck is released into a nearby park.

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there were two cyclists cycling at a steady pace down a main road in china, one irish and the other chinese. now they happened to be cycling at exactly the same time and exactly the same pace. why did the irish cyclist get pulled over and the chinese not? because the irish cyclist had in fact brutally raped and murdered a young child in his home town and then fled the country to china.

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It's raining, its pouring, the old man is snoring. He bumps his head, and is quickly rushed to the ER for serious head trauma

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I wanted to burn some calories, so i lit a fat kid on fire

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Roses are red Violets are blue I am not using commas That is improper punctuation.

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Q: The girl fell for the guy, but the guy was sad about it, why? A: Because she fell off a cliff.

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Two men walk into a bar and begin ordering drinks. Both men engage in polite conversation with each other. At the end of the night they each take taxi's home because they realize the potential risk they pose to others if they drive intoxicated.

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Is Yered a dumbass? YA

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A black car pulls up early in the morning and slows down by your house You see him pull a mysterious object out of his car and point it at you, The paper boy tosses a newspaper at you

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Knock Knock Whos there? Me. I am a psycopathic heroin addict, and i came to your house to violently rape you and kill your whole family. I dont have a family. Oh.

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*ahem* what? what. oh I thought you said something

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A man walks into an insane asylum and says hello-The inmates assault him with mindless babble. A man walks into an insane asylum and says argblthenthrozaphowea-The inmates say hello.

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A black man, a Jewish man, and a gay man walk into a bar. They are all good friends who want to enjoy drinks together.

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Whats 2 Plus 2? God Just Solve It.

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I would very much love to meet you again Erron, call me sometime I do not care how you get my number.

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A:how many notzies dose it change a light bulb B:none they made the jewish do it. :(

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Why did Jimmy pass out Cause he drank a full tallboy

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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