What did the 5 year old girl ask Santa for Christmas? A pony.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

Why did billy go to the beach? To spread his moms ashes on the sand.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

what did batman say to robin? get in the car

thumb_up thumb_down -2

what do you say when you wake up in the middle of the night and see your tv floating thats odd.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What do you call a man who eats another man? An man eater.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Why can't Stephen Hawking run a marathon? Because it takes years of hard training to accomplish such a remarkable feat.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

i know leaves are green because of chlorophyll but i don't know how to get a mortgage this is the kind if shit your parents pay for

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Two men drove their car of a cliff. They died.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Whats red and hairy ? A carpet !

thumb_up thumb_down +68

Q:what do you call a black man in a wheel chair? A: a war veteran who accidentally stepped on a land mine while trying to protect his country.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Q:What is usually pink, brown or black, usually big and comes out smaller, which goes in and out of your mothers mouth? A: Could be lots of things really... Moral: But we all know what you imagined you sick bastard!

thumb_up thumb_down -19

If olive oil is made from olives and vegetable oil from vegetables, what is baby oil made of? Mineral Oil, Aloe Vera Extract, Vitamin E, Acetate, Fragrance.

thumb_up thumb_down +659

Write your own pointless joke on http://pointless-jokes.tk

thumb_up thumb_down -20

A duck walks into a bar and asks for a beer. The bartender realizing this is an odd situation, seeing that ducks cannot articulate the English language, realizes he must be dreaming. He wakes up and turns to tell his wife about the dream, but she won't respond. He then realizes how his marriage is in shambles...

thumb_up thumb_down -4

How do you make lady gaga angry? punch her in the face and throw her off a cliff

thumb_up thumb_down -10

WHITE POWER WHITE POWER WHITE POWER WHITE POWER WHITE POWER WHITE POWER WHITE POWER WHITE POWER WHITE POWER WHITE POWER WHITE POWER WHITE POWER WHITE POWER WHITE POWER WHITE POWER WHITE POWER WHITE POWER WHITE POWER WHITE POWERWHITE POWER WHITE POWER WHITE POWER WHITE POWER WHITE POWERWHITE POWER WHITE POWER WHITE POWER WHITE POWER WHITE POWER WHITE POWER WHITE POWER WHITE POWER WHITE POWER WHITE POWER WHITE POWER WHITE POWER WHITE POWER WHITE POWER WHITE POWER WHITE POWER WHITE POWER WHITE POWER WHITE POWER WHITE POWER WHITE POWER WHITE POWER WHITE POWER WHITE POWER WHITE POWER WHITE POWER WHITE POWER WHITE POWER WHITE POWER WHITE POWER WHITE POWER WHITE POWER WHITE POWER WHITE POWER WHITE POWER WHITE POWER WHITE POWER WHITE POWER WHITE POWER WHITE POWER WHITE POWER WHITE POWER WHITE POWER WHITE POWER WHITE POWER WHITE POWER WHITE POWER WHITE POWER

thumb_up thumb_down -26

How many elephants can you fit in a car? Five. Two in the front, two in the back, and one in the glove compartment.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

yo momma is so tall shes tall

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What do you get when you cross a parrot and a beach ball? A beach ball with a parrot design on it.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

How many lemons does it take to fix a lightbulb Lemons can't fix lightbulbs as the don't have a mind,heart or any limbs.Think about that crap.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Oh, no! There is a ginger jew within 2 meters of me!

thumb_up thumb_down -27

why did the chicken cross the road? who cares its a chicken.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Joke below was made by Daniel Textor, he's a d i c k.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Frostbite.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops