What do you call a kid on crutches? Crippled

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No it isn't.

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The 80's called. They need their couch back.

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What is the difference between an anti-joke and a joke? The word anti before anti-joke.

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What do you call a mexican working at Taco Bell? An intelligent young man who recently graduated from high school, but due to his family's lack of money, he cannot pay for college, which is one of the reason's why he is working. He also needs money becuase he has a child on the way, due to his poor choice of not using protection while having intoxicated relations with his girlfriend. I wish him the best of luck!

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women's rights

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how do you remove a black man from a car? Wash the bumper

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Ryan Chang is funny.

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What's big? Jupiter.

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What do you call Madeline McCann at the bottom of the sea? Drowned Madeline McCann.

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A nun with shoes on walks into a bar with her husband.

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Why did Timmy stop running? He got hit by a bus

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What is brown and sticky? A stick

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Roses are red Violets are blue Your whole family is dead And now it's time for you!

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Why did the Mexican cross the border? To get into the USA for a better lifestyle.

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Man: Hey honey! you look mighty fine today! Want to go play some lax? Woman: I'd love to! Thanks babe! Man: Just kidding you are a woman.

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Roses are green. Violets are purple. Charlie Sheen. Looks a turtle.

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A man walks into a bar a bartender says, 'why the long face'? the man says 'I just walked into a bar'!!!

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One terrible stormy night, the citizens of Ristoville were hiding from the monsterous lightning cloud approaching them. Little Jonny Harrison, however, was not afraid. This boy had been bullied from the ripe young age of about 14 months by his closest friend, Uncle Oliver, who happens to be a Catholic Priest. Jonny wanted to face the storm, with 6 years behind him, he thought it bizzare that anything worse than Uncle Oliver's magical basement could be brought unto him. He grabbed his supply of Cheese and Onion Quavers, a couple cartons of Apple and Blackcurrant Flavoured Ribena, his pretend mobile, a 10ft long metal conductor and his pet grape, "Christopher", and set out for the journey of his life. He told his terminally ill mother that he is going for the adventure of a lifetime, his dad that he wishes him well, and finally, his Grandmother, Rosie Harrison, who has had a severe addiction to meth for almost 25 years now, who has had over 13 interventions and countless attempts at suicide, that he loves her with all of his strong, brave heart, and to hang in there. Little Jonny Harrison takes his first step outside, facing the eye of storm with a little bit of pee in his pants, squeezes his Ribena, slightly squirting it and throwing it heroicly to the drooping wet grass, and screams to the cloud, at the top of his lungs, the words, "I am unstoppable!". Jonny died of HIV induced AIDS and his Uncle was given three to five years, depending on behavior, in a high security prison for child molestation and consistent domestic abuse and paedophillia. His Grandmother, Rosie, also died later that day.

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why did the irishman, the englishman and the african man die? because i went on a violent killing spree, murdering everyone i saw

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What's worse than the holocaust? An open-minded black man.

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How do Chinese parents name their children? With deep thought and consideration about a thoughtful, respectful and honorable name.

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Why is an orange, orange. Because you can't clean a window with a spade.

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Yo mama's fat.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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