What happened when Mark's hair died? He got depressed that he was growing old and the signs of it were showing.

What happens when you cut down a tree? It falls down.

Q: Why was the man hit by the train? A: He was tied to the rail road tracks...

You know what's addicting? Heroine.

Four blonds are driving to Disneyworld. They got in a crash and died.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding two worms in your apple.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Some poems rhyme, This one doesn't.

Why did the monkey cross the road? Because he saw the chicken do it.

A blind man walks into a bar... And a table. And a chair.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 recently got out of prison for violent rape.

What's worse than the holocaust? Nothing you insensitive ass!

What can be said about a high school drop out who is 30, lives with his mom, and plays WoW all day? He is probably a very high level mage

What do you call dinosaur flatulence? Jurassic Fart!

Why couldn't the young african american read? He was born blind

Roses are red. Violets are blue. Onions stink. And so do you.

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

What's white, wet, and loved by women? A polar bear cub.

( . Y . )

How many Jews does it take to screw in a lightbulb. Two. But it would have to be a very big lightbulb to fit both of them in there.

Yeah, but why is this honesty so important for you, personal reasons because you are like that, because you consider me a friend? Or because a single lie, could have catastrophical consequences?

penis

How do you get pikachu onto a bus? You can't. Pikachu is a fictional creature and therefore does not exist.

A forty-year-old man forces a young child to strip down and take a shower. The child screams and cries, but the man persists angily. He then carries the child into his bed. The child pleads, "Help! Mom, make him stop!" The mother yells back, "Just listen to him. He's your father and it's past your bedtime." This is a common night-time routine for parents with their first child

-Knock, knock. -Who's there? -The pest control guy. -Please leave me alone I'm giving birth.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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