Q: what do you get when you mix a bull dog and a shiitzu? A: a dog

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MICHAEL

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What does Mitt Romney approve of flip flops? They feel good on his feet.

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What do you call a black man flying a plane? A piolet you racist!

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What's black and white and red all over? I don't know either.

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Now this is a story all about how, my life got flipped, turned upside down. Now I'd like to take a minute, just sit right there, and I'll tell you how I lost my job at the tire plant, and how, being out of work and unable to find a new job, I was unable to pay my mortgage. The bank repossessed my house, my wife left me and took custody of the kids, and I ended up having to sell all my remaining possessions and move to a new city in order to try and find employment.

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a blonde, brunette and a red head are all goin to jump off a bridge and turn into something. the brunette jumps and says fish, and she turns into a fish. the red head says eagle and bacomes an eagle. the blonde gets a running start, but then trips on the way off and she says shit and turns into shit.

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Sarah went to church one day and went into the confession booth with her pastor. He made sure nobody was in the church, and proceeded to allow her to confess. He didn't molest her. However, when Sarah got home her abusive stepfather beat her to death in an alcoholic rage and shot himself. It was on the news.

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Why didn't suzzana go to school on Monday?? Because it was Sunday...I lied about it being monday

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Why was the Jew evicted from his home? He forgot to pay the rent

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Q: How do you know a chinese guy robbed your house? A: your homework is done, your computer is updated, and 2 hours later he is still trying to back out of your driveway

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What do you call 4 black people at a kfc? A family sitting down for there evening meal

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How many black people does it take to complete the simplest task such as washing their own hair? A **** load! thats why slavery was so populer back in the day. (and gays were big then to because they had to shower together to remember to wash their hair).

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Whats worse than one jew. Ben rike

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was uneducated and was not aware of the dangers of streets in heavily populated cities.

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What does a spider Pig do? Nothing. They dont exist.

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When life gives you melons you may be dyslexic.

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What do elephants and grapes have in common? They are both purple arpart from the elephant, which is grey. I lied about it being purple

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A blonde is elected President of the United States. Half way through her inauguration speech, she forgets how to read.

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Why did the black man cross the road? Black people don't exist.

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What animal is green and eats rocks? The green rockeater

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Why do hummingbirds hum? They don't realize how annoying it is.

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Why did i write this joke? Because i'm a try hard.

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Whats the difference between Lady Gaga and a man? Nothing. I was lying about their being a difference.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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