the person who wrote 1 under me is gay

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An Englishman, Scotsman and an Irishman walk into a pub where they are presented with a situation, the Englishman and Scotsman react appropriately but the Irishman does something foolish.

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Why did Doris want to father children? Because she wanted to have a fry-up with the leftover baby oil

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a dyslexic Satan worshiper sold his soul to Santa

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Yo' Mama's so old that her age is over the average age of most people.

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What did God say to Adam and Eve? Be fruitful

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Why couldn't the black man get home? His car broke down, and Goodyear was closed.

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A man is walking down thwe street. All of the sudden, an armoured truck comes around the corner really fast. The back doors swing open, and bags of money fly toward him. "I can believe this is real!" the Man exclaimed. "It's not. Feed the pig." said a man in pig suit with a giant coin-slot on the head.

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What do you do if you are surrounded by 2000 Hungry cannibals? You talk to them in a calm yet determined diplomatic voice, then you become a part of them. Moral: A part of them... Forever.

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How does a man with no arms and legs get to your door. After asking his name please help us out with this question

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What did the smoker get for christmas? A bike.

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How did the fat guy survive the air crash? He was he was astronomically and improbably lucky.

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What do a rabbit and a plum have in common? They're both purple expect the rabbit

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Whats worse than a dead baby? 6 million dead Jews.

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A brachiosaurus walks into a cafe "Excuse me I'm an herbivore, can I have a full English breakfast, but with veggie sausages instead of normal sausages, and mushrooms instead of bacon?" Shop keeper: "No you can't. Your too big. You've destroyed my kitchen, and my livelihood. I have nothing left. You've accidently reduced my business to rubble by walking through the door"

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whats worse than war? being tied to a chair and watch your parents die.

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How did the black guy swim across the Atlantic? He didn't. He was prepared to, but then went on Expedia and found a ticket with Continental Airlines that was in his budget. He did not like the amount of service he recieved, and decided in the future he will save up and fly with a different company, or in fact swim across.

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Whats black, white and dusty? A nuns fan-y because it never gets used

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What do you call a Mexican with a lawnmower? The guy I'm thinking of is named Pedro. He works hard and takes care of his family.

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a fish swimming in the water swims

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Why did the koala fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second koala fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first one. Why did the third koala fall out of the tree? Peer pressure!

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Why did the Asian guy's condom slip? Because the condom was put on the opposite way.

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A black man walks out of a store with a receipt.

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what did the chinese guy say to the black guy? hello

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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