Why did Helen Keller's dog run away? You'd run away too if someone left the gate open and you happened to be a dog.

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If life gives you lemons, don't accept them because you have a citrus allergy.

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What do you get when Chuck Norris meets Chuck Norris? A bad joke.

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Hi

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A woman went for a midnight jog. She's been missing for 12 years now.

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Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? He died! Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? He was attached to the first! Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? He thought it was a game! Why did the fridge fall out of the tree? The branch broke! Why did Sally fall off her bike? She got hit by three monkeys and a fridge!

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why cant dogs write letters? They do not have the dexterity to hold a pen, or even comprehend the basic language skills and grammatical layout of how to write a letter

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Why did the cookie go to the docter? Because he was dieing of terminal cancer.

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Q: why do shower heads have 11 holes? A: Jews only have 10 fingers

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I don't know where I am, I'm blind.

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What did the gay man say to the other gay man? I like guys... cause I'm gay.

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A horse walks into a bar. He ordered some fries.

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Yeah Aodhans been typing up everything strting argument along with taggart

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Why are females bad drivers? Because it is hard to drive with pots and pans.

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What's the difference between a box of dead babies and a Lamborghini? I don't have a Lamborghini in my garage

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The man that loved birds so much that he played golf just to get a birdie.

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Roses are red Violets are blue One fish two fish Red fish blue fish

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Adam said to God, "God, I need a companion." God replied, "OK Adam, but you need to give up a rib." Adam agreed and thus humanity was born.

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what did chloe say to alexis? you took my phone

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What happened to the white girl who dropped her ice cream? She bought another one.

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What did goldilocks say to the three bears? she was savagely murdered before she could say anything.

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A man went skydiving and tragically died.

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Why is six afraid of seven? Because seven three twelve. Am i doing it right?

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Q: Why did the little girl upset? A: Because she was part of the human centipede

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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