A ham sandwich walks into a bar, bartender says "We don't serve food here."

thumb_up thumb_down

(Man #1): Do you know how I know you're gay? (Man #2): How? (Man #1) When I kiss you, you kiss me back...

thumb_up thumb_down +3

A son went to ask his father about his thoughts on abortion. "Dad, what do you think about abortion?" "Ask your sister." "I don't have a.."

thumb_up thumb_down -17

On the first day of Christmas my true love gave to me, AIDS

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What did the black kid get for his birthday? A bike, just what he asked for.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

What did the human say to the human? You are a human.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Why do innocent boys have wet dreams? Cause Jesus sucks.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

1, 2, buckle my shoe. 3, 4, shut the door. 5, 6, I'm gonna to cut you in your sleep.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why did the black man run? There was a mass murderer chasing him with a chainsaw.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

What's the opposite of stupid? diputs

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why did the boy fall out of his tree house? the tree house was hit by lightning

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Why did Eve eat the fruit first? Because women are whores.

thumb_up thumb_down

Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

whos the bitch now!?! you are.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

A blonde, a redhead, and a brunette were driving on a highway. The redhead asked the brunette, who had the map, which was the next exit. The blonde was better with maps so she took it and announced where to go. They made the exit and enjoyed a nice lunch.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

An English man a Scotts man and an Irish man buy a helicopter between them,they go to pick it up after paying for it and realise that non of them can fly it. so they get a refund and go to the pub.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

why do elephants drink so much? to try to forget.

thumb_up thumb_down +40

Four blondes are driving to Disney World. When they are in Florida, there is a sign that says "Disney left" Upset, they make a u-turn and go home.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What's the difference between a dead baby and a Ferrari? I don't keep a Ferrari in my garage. (????)?

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Why did the chicken cross the road... He wanted to get away from all those jerks who kept asking him why he made the decisions that he did. he later committed suicide...

thumb_up thumb_down +9

An Indian man left a 20% tip after eating at the closest restaurant to him

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What's red and has two legs? Half a cat!

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Knock, Knock Who's there ? So So who? No, So Lee

thumb_up thumb_down

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops