Why did the chicken cross the road!? He was supposed to be dead! You are by far the most incompetent chicken assassin we've ever had. You're fired.

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A man spills his his drink. Like any other man would do, he got some paper towels and some mult-purpose cleaner and proceeded to wipe up the mess. Not a further word was said about the situation.

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Why is there an owl out during the day? I don't know.

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Why is the earth round? Because God saw it was flat and thought "too flat lets turn it around" And all was good.

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Is every Voltorb a terrorist?

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Did you hear about the human cannonball who lost his job? Circus attendance is on the decline, as people are spending less money on entertainment, due to a slow economy and poor consumer confidence. Because the circus owners paid him under the table, he did not qualify for unemployment and was force to take a job at Hardies. He has a drinking problem and suffers from depression.

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Why shouldn't you go to California? Because there are sharks there, obviously.

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Joey and Haley have sex; what does he say to her the next morning? Happy 6th birthday daughter.

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What came first the chicken or the egg? Neither, chickens have been extinct since 1987.

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A boy got scratched by a dog and nearly killed him. When he grew up, a dog came running up to him and started biting and scratching him till he couldn't handle it. Then a plane crashed into him and he died.

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My Joke Is The Persons Below Me I I V

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how do you upset a barber? Murder his family

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A couple arrive at a Halloween party for nudists. Then they enjoy the themed decor and food.

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How do you fit a giraffe into a refrigerator? You cut it into pieces.

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Doctor, Doctor. I think I've broke my arm! I'm going to refer you to the fracture clinic.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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Q: What's worse than a black guy with a gun? A: the holocaust

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What is the difference between a woman and a catfish? One is a bottom-feeding scum-sucker and the other is the most common term for adult females of the human race.

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whats worse than finding a worm in your apple All of the antijokes about it

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What do babies suck on? juice boxes!

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Roses are red violets are blue I have five fingers the middle one is for you.

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A man walks into a bar and says ouch.

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Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? Because she was blind.

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A man says hello to his best friend in the morning like he always does. Why did his best friend not reply? The mans best friend is not real and is actually a figment of the mans imagination because he has been suffering from a severe case of schizophrenia his whole life and has many imaginary friends.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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