A local police officer pulls up to tell you something. Listen carefully: Three zebras have been spotted crossing the Mexican border. He goes into his truck, pulls out a can of marbles, peanut butter, seven velcro straps and a rhino horn covered in glitter. Your mission is simple: Kill the zebras using your equipment. You will be rewarded if you have enough peanut butter to make a sandwich after. Go now... Get it done.

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What is purple after you stroke it a lot? An eggplant

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What is the difference between a person of Mexican heritage and a park bench? One is a bench, the other is a human being.

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what is the best invention ever created ? ............ PORN !!!!

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Whats long hard and has seaman? A submarine!

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot lost control of the plane.

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God is almighty, as such he ANSWERS TO NO ONE! Moral: What you praying for then bitch?

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Why did the black guy cross the road? To save the endangered child from getting hit by a car across the street.

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I like my 40's like I like my women, in ABUNDANCE.

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What did the black man do when he saw a bike sitting on the sidewalk? He took it into the shop paid for it and rode off feeling good about how hes helping the environment.

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What doesn't kill you leaves you in a coma.

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Don't you hate the retarded smart people who think anti-jokes are all about really explaining but adding sarcasm? Yes.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I dont really care anymore BECAUSE I'M SICK AND TIRED OF THIS CLICHE!

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Q:Why did the boy have no friends A: because Ants are not considered friends

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You know whats funny? Matty Broom.

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How do you stop a black guy from drowning? Take your foot off his head.

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What is the sound of one hand clapping? I don't know you have a hand try it yourself lazy prick.

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Q:Why couldn't the baby walk down the hall way? A: It had a javelin stuck in its head.

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You might not notice at first, but in this very sentence there is a psychological phrase that is used to hypnotise you. If you read through the first sentence of this paragraph three or four times, you may start to feel the sudden urge to have a drink. This is called the ashvakalym effect.

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A straight black man walks into a gay bar.

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What do Lincoln, JFK, and Barack Obama all have in common? They were all president of the United States of America and are relatively good people.

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A black man walks into a white man on the street. The white man viciously beats the black man.

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What do you call 47 black people dead at the bottom of the ocean? A terrible hate crime

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i have to tell you a knock knock joke. but you have have to start it..

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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