Why is it easy to steal candy from a baby? Because the baby is smaller, weaker and would not pose any threat.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Charles. Charles who? It's your brother Charles. I came straight here from the doctor. I was just diagnosed with stage 4 testicular cancer.

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Two arabs fly into a bar in the twin towers

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Why does Gandalf have special powers? Because Dumbledore died.

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"what did the priest say to the rabbi?" "what" "my religions better

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why did the cookie go to the doctor? he had to get a physical to be eligible for his school's football tryouts. his mom drove him there but was very careful not to get his hopes up too high since his chances of actually making the team were slim to none based on the fact that he had no arms or legs but only succulent chocolate chips in every bite.

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what starts with b and ends with b? The bomb i just planted in your house.

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what do u call a black persons face? a black persons face...

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The WNBA

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whats helen kellers favorite activity fingering herself

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A duck walks into a 7-11 and says "Give me some chapstick, put it on my bill!" But the cash register attendee doesn't speak English and cannot understand him. He does, however, question whether his God is punishing him because as all people know, Ducks cannot speak, however, this hallucination must be punishment for a horrid misdeed. The employee breaks down into tears and begins reciting prayer. The duck, slightly miffed, walks out, pondering why he'd need chapstick anyway, since he has no lips.

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What do you get when you cross a rooster with a cocker spaniel? Nothing, because roosters and Dog's don't mix.

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When life gives you lemons, Life isn't actually a person so saying that would be irrelevant

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Why did the little boy didn't finish his dinner? He died.

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Knock knock *open*

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A: Knock knock. B: Who's there? A: I am.

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a chicken crosses the street to ask a man: what is an anti-joke? the man replies: a joke the chicken responds: so why do they call it an ANTI-joke? the man answers: why did the horse walk into a bar? the chicken retorts: you can't answer a question with a question! the man replies: you're a figment of my imagination, nah nah nah nah i can't hear you.

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How do you convince a therapist that he is crazy? Hide in a fortress made of sporks wearing nothing but a belt, and start hissing and throwing paint at him repeatedly.

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whats black, then white, then dead all over? Michael jackson

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What is the difference between a bike and a baby? There are a lot of differences

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dry handjob

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A rabbi walks into a bar mitzvah

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How do you get a clown off a swing? Hold his family at gun point

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Did the single mother survive the plane crash? No.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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