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A priest, rabbi, and mormon are arguing about which religion is best. A zookeeper hears and says, "I have a bear who is sleeping right now. How about whoever converts the bear belongs to the best religion?" The priest goes in first, and then walks out a few minutes later, unharmed. The mormon does the same, and he too exits unscathed. The rabbi goes in, and walks out covered in claw marks. "How'd it go?" Said the zookeeper. "Easy." Said the priest. "I just sprinkled some Holy water on him." "I did the same." Said the mormon. The rabbi looked at the zookeeper and said, "have you ever tried to circumcise a bear?"

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What did the faggot say? Nothing, he shot himself due to high school bullying and rejecting parents.

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Why did the kid throw a clock out the window? The kid was probably having a temper tantrum and it was an expression of frustration.

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Knock Knock Who's there? You You Who? Yes? Can I help you madam?

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What's the worst part about censorship? **** *** **** **** *** **** *** ********.

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WHART++EWEEEEEEEP FLARPEN CARPEN FLARP

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What time is it when an elephant sits on your fence? Time to call animal control.

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Why did Little Jimmy cross the road? Little Jimmy doesnt have arms and legs, silly, he cant cross the road.

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In Soviet Russia, there was a movement to be renamed into the Russian Federation, which passed on December 25, 1991.

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Want a fight? You Spelt F**K wrong O.o

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What did the boy and girl do at the wedding? 69:)

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A gay guy asks a boy out and a girl The girl said no but the guy said yes And the two gay guys went to dinner And made out

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man walks into a bar and the bartender says, "you sir are gay!" The gay man says, "I take offense to that!" The bartender then replies "how may I help you."

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Have you ever had Ethiopian food? No.. Neither have they.

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wheres a place a cancer patient cant go? the hairdressers

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wanna know the biggest joke on antijoke.com? People's spelling.

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What did the cow say to the other cow? "Baaa", he had an identity crisis.

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Roses are red Violets are blue You don't want to be my valintine I'm going to shoot myself.

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Why did the little girl fall off of the swing? Because she has no arms. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not her.

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two cannables walk in to McDonalds

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Why is Santa's sack so big? He has a malignant tumour on his testicle. We're all very worried about him.

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I used to be able to walk, but then I took an arrow to the knee. It tore my acl and shattered my kneecap.

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What do you call an asian plumber? A plumber.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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