The fox said to the walrus, "Hatee-hatee-hatee-ho!" And the walrus replied, "Goo-Goo-g'joob".

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What did the cow say to the chicken? Moo. Moral: Cuckoo!

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In Soviet Russia a lot of people were killed for voicing their opinion against Stalin

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Snape dies. ^ Spoiler Alert tarelona major

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Why do black people eat fried chicken? Because eating raw chicken is just wrong.

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A Man: Why does it seem as though you always find what you need in the last place you look? Another Man: Probably because you don't continue to look.

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If woman that have big breasts work at Hooters, then do woman with one leg work at Ihop?

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Whats black and white and red all over? My wife, i constantly beat her and I should probably be arrested for it if she didnt love me so much

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Colby Michael Schluter

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Knock knock. Who's there? Apple. Apple who? Apple juice.

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What's the opposite of a joke. An anti-joke.

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What do you do if your walking into a room full of Lions and Jaguars? You stop walking.

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What did one saggy boob say to the other one? Better perk up or they'll think we're nuts.

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Why was 7 afraid of 6, because 6 raped 5

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What do you call a black guy that has a big white coat, an assortment of knives and a couple of women working for him? A doctor

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Why was Mrs. Clause mad at Santa Clause? Because he was hanging out with three hoes, Ho, Ho, and Ho

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what is meaningless and not fun at all? that joke

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What do two zebras look like next to each other? Two zebras

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Two fish are sitting in a tank. One says, "I'll man the guns. You drive."

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A woman was shopping at her local supermarket where she selected: a half-gallon of 2% milk, a carton of eggs, a quart of orange juice, a head of romaine lettuce, a 2 lb. can of coffee and a 1 lb. package of bacon. As she was unloading her items on the conveyor belt to check out, a drunk standing behind her watched as she placed the items in front of the cashier. While the cashier was ringing up her purchases, the drunk calmly stated, “You must be single.” The woman was a bit startled by this proclamation, but she was intrigued by the derelict’s intuition, since she was indeed single. She looked at her six items on the belt and saw nothing particularly unusual about her selections that could have tipped off the drunk to her marital status. Curiosity getting the better of her, she said “Well, you know what, you’re absolutely correct. But how on earth did you know that?” The drunk replied, “Cause you’re ugly.”

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Friend's sister: how many seconds are in 12 o'clock Friend: alot Friend's sister: WELL THEN 12 O'CLOCK IS A REWERJAJSBDKDJDHRJRJFHFKRJRIDBDKSBSDJ *slams door*

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This is not mean't to be a joke, but I have noticed the least popular thing on here is the Jew and the Pizza joke. I am Jewish and find this extremely offensive. I applaud all of those who gave it a negative vote and realize the Holocaust is not a laughing matter.

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Going for the Dislike record woot I farted!

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Did you know, that every 60 seconds in Africa, a minute passes?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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