Why did Nigel decide to lie and remain on the ground? He didn't. Somebody beat him ruthlessly and stole his wheelchair. Nigel has no legs by the way.

Santa Claus, "Ho ho ho!" Asain Santa Claus, "Hohohohohohohoho!" Pedophile Santa Claus, "Ho ho ho! Come and sit on my lap children!" Dyslexic Santa Claus, "Oh oh oh! Merry Shitcrams!" Narcopleptic Santa Claus, "Ho ho..." *snores*. Black Santa Claus, well, I wouldn't like the idea of a black fat guy breaking into my house, eating my cookies, drinking my milk, and leaving presents under my tree. Would you?

Roses are red Violets are blue and oranges are orange nothing rhymes with orange

Man walks in the bar then buys a drink

Why did the Muslim guy look nervous and sweaty when the plane took off? Because he is claustrophobic. Racist fucks

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Reading another damn "worm in your apple" joke.

Roses are black Violets are Black I'm Hellen Keller

I used to tell people: step on my foot on purpose and ill FUCKlNG BREAK YOURS! Then I Evolved.. friendly r*pist neighbourhood Moral Man: Thumb me down or step on my foot if only on mistake, and I will break off both your legs and ram them up your ASS!

How many ADHD kids does it take to change a light bulb? Let's go ride our bikes!

Why can't Anne Frank write a sequel? Because she's dead.

Why did the boy's house get destroyed? It was bombed.

Roses are red Violets are blue I have amnesia Roses are red

what is the difference between a jew and a pizza? Jews are people and regularly attend a synagogue and pizza is and italian food that many people find to be enjoyable to eat

What did the passive-aggressive woman do to her husband? She killed him. As it turns out, the slight passive-aggressive behavior she was showing was actually an early warning sign of a dangerous sociopathic mental disorder. The authorities are looking for her as we speak.

What is the best time to go to the dentist? When you have a toothache

What do Helen Keller and Beethoven have in common? They both died wondering what the hell their last words were.

What did the goat say to the other goat? They are poorly evolved animals and incable of speaking.

How many mice does it take to screw in a light bulb? Two.

An obese man walked into McDonalds and ordered 6 Big Macs. He proceeded to walk to a booth in the back corner and eat them all. Turns out he was white.

"Have you got any Saturday jobs available?" "Yes"

What do you call a guy who answers your door Whatever his name his

Why did the old man fall down the stairs? Because he wanted to impress his wife.

Why did the buetiful woman marry the homeless man? True love

I saw GESUS and SHE's BLACK

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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