roses are red. violets are violet...

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A jew, a catholic, and a muslim walk into a bar. Within minutes, they begin to argue about religion. After a few hours of intense debate, all three left dissatisfied and upset.

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why did the teacher quit her job and become a musician? Because her class was very mean to her and growing up she had always wanted to play music

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I love you.

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Ipod to earbuds: "hey buds" earbuds response: "sup player"

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How do you make a baby float? Take your foot of its head.

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What's black and white and red all over? A post-racial communist country.

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knock knock whos there knock knock whos there knock knock whos there poor billy didnt know that the knocking was just a tree branch and he stayed asking the same question for 21 years

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Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems rhyme But this one doesn't

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What's worst that cancer? Murder porn

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How do you get a one-armed Polak out of a tree? Get him a ladder and help him down.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? "Where's my tractor"

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Why did the color blind man cut the red wire and accidentally blew himself up and all the other people involved in the situation? Because he didn't know how to defuse a bomb.

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What's worse than a baby in a car accident? The baby survives and has a mental problem, grows up, and then drives the same car and gets in another accident.

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A guy wanted to write a joke. He didn't.

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What did Winnie the Pooh say to Eeyore? Nothing, he just suffocated him in a pot of honey.

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What do you calla baby nailed to a wall? Art.

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There once was a man from Peru, Who fell into an extremely deep sleep and woke up just before he choked to death on his shoe rubber.

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Q:What did the slut have in her mouth? A: teeth.

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because she didn't have any arms.

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Q. How many blonds do you know? A. I don't know any blonds, but are you perhaps talking about blondes? Because if so, I still don't know any.

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why did jonathan not get any presents for the holiday?because it was the 4th of July

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why was 6 afraid of 7? Becuase 7 watched his friend die. He slowly went into a depression so deep he went on a murderous rampage.

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what has 4 legs three eyes and a horn? a:yo mama

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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