1 + 1 = ? 2 "No" "what have you been smoking?" "Seriously, 1+1= window" "WTF???"

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A black man walks into a sporting goods store and pulls out a gun! Then he returns it and leaves.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Hello Carolina, let me lick your vagina.

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Why didn't the boy finish the race? He was handicapped

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Why'd the littler girl fall of the swing? because a drunk driver ran through the swing, the little girl was killed. he was later charged with manslaughter.

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Today is March 22.

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Why did the mum scream at the boy? Because he was being stupid

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What do you call a lot of Chinese people in a confined place? A Chinese urban center.

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1 black guy jumped off a cliff at the same time as a white guy, who fell first? The one who weighed the most.

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A man walks into a bar. He had to leave promptly because he, according to the law, was too young to be served alcohol.

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How many drunk Irishmen did it take to change the lightbulb? None, the bulb was fine.

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husband : honey , can i have stuff candy wife : no husband : can i have milk and cookies wife : what kind of milk wink wink husband 2% you pervert

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What did God say to the snake when the Snake decided to ignore God and just give Eve the apples? Snake what are you doing? Answer me, SNAKE! SNAAAAAAAAAAAAAKE! *DUN DUN DURUDUN! DU DU DUN! *gunshot* Moral: I just hate thumbs ups, and the comments where I omit this receives those horrible green thumbs instead of them sexy red ones, so there goes.

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A dog walks into a bar and is promptly escorted out as animals are not allowed.

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There are 3 guys, a fat guy, a skinny guy, and sexy guy. They all work together and have lunch together. The fat guy opens his bag and eats a ham and turkey sandwich. The skinny guy opens his bag and eats a tuna sandwich. The sexy guy opens his bag and eats an egg sandwich. The fat guy finishes his meal. The skinny guy saves half for later. The sexy guy ate more than half of his food. A genie magically appears. The End

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whats the difference between a white man and a black man? I like cake

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what happened to the atheist when he died? he went to HELL

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A drunk is pissing on the plaza and the cop stands next to him and says, very nice. The drunk says, that's what she said. : )

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What do you call a orange striped zebra? No not a tiger stupid its a orange striped zebra duh!

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Knock Knock. Who's there? A cannibal. WHAT?! You are about to die and be eaten.

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A child is in the grocery checkout with their parents. It sees the candy display and asks for a pack of Reese's. When the parents do not grant the child's request, they begin to scream and cry. When they arrive home, the child is beaten with a copper rod. The new puppy that the child got for a birthday present is hanged and fed to buzzards.

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Why did it look like the girl peed herself? Because she peed herself

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There was a bunch of kids on a bus. One boy yelled "Look a squirrel!" Nobody saw it because he's dyslexic

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What did the guy say to the girl when she was on her knees? Stop playing with it put it in your mouth

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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