Why did the chicken cross the road? Well, most likely, the chicken escaped from a near by ranch or farm. Upon escaping, he may have simply wandered in the direction of the road, and hence crossed it. Or, with chickens having great curiosity, may have been attracted to something on the other side of the road and felt the urge to explore. Depending on the demographics of the area in which road was in, the chicken had different chances of being hit by an automobile. That's why.

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if life gives you lemons. squeeze one into your moms eye.

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Your mama's so nice, she made me cookies once. And I enjoyed them.

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What is small, cries a lot, and moves at high speeds? A baby stapled to a car.

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Why were the floors of the movie theaters so sticky? Spilled beverages.

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whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? genocide whats worse than genocide? getting raped by a giant scorpion

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So a guy walks into the doctors and say "Doctor it hurts when i poke my knee like this" the doctor says "Let me see your hand" the doctor squeezes the patients finger and the patient says "ow!" the doctor says "now poke you knee again" the patient pokes his knee and says "it still hurts" so the doctor comes to a conclusion and says " you dont have a broken kneecap you have a broken finger, stupid, now get out and leave me alone!"

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what does a baby with no lims get for christmas...cancer

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The closest I've been to an animal charity was when I walked past it to by myself a fur coat

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What did the Johhny say to the black man when he saw him buying a watermelon? Nothing, Johnny is mute.

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Why did the black guy buy a jug of grape soda Because he was thirsty

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What did the blind kid that couldn't talk get for Christmas Cancer

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Why did the tomato fall off the swing? Because tomatoes don't have arms.

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How did the ship-less pirate cross the Atlantic? In an airplane.

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Q: What was Steve Jobs' last words before he died? A: I Think i might die.

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why did the man jump off the building? to commit suicide.

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What do you get when you put Star Wars and Disney together? A Bad Sequel

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Why was the new born on the orphanage's doorstep? He was an accident.

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A hill billy went fishing

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What did the Banana say to the Peach. Nothing, they are incapable of speaking because they are fruit.

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What's good about freedom of speech? Only the idea. Try saying something about Muhammed or calling a cop a power-mad taxman.

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How did Chris die? Bush-fire

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How do you get all the apples off of an apple tree? You pick them

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Yo mama so short she often has to ask you to retrieve items from the top shelf of her cabinet.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops