nock nock " whos there" , "open the door and you will see

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Why is Kim Jong Un so fat? Because he takes all the food in the country and sends his own people to live in concentration camps!

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Whats worse than your shoe being untied? 911

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Have you seen Stevie wonders new house? No Neither has he.

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Q. What's green, has wheels and flies? A. A garbage truck.

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Bumsniffer

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Why didn't the boy go to the bathroom? His mother was taking a well deserved bath.

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What did the man without a tongue say...

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What happened to the man who poo'd too much? He started to eat less because his bowell movements started to cause him serious pain.

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How many pancakes does it take to build a doghouse? Pancakes are not a feasible material with which to build a doghouse.

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I know a lady who is SOOO fat that when she steps into the ocean, she gets her toes wet!

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What did the dead baby say to horse? Nothing, it was dead

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What's brown and green, has six legs and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you? A pool table.

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BOB:john John:what? BOB:4:59 seconds to get rid of it

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two muffins are in an oven. 30 min. later i ate a delicious treat.

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How do you know if you've been drinking too much? You find yourself in a closet screaming, "I'm in Narnia!!!"

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Whats Something everyone has except david? Money.

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If you can cut half a rope. You can cut the whole rope.

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How many of my Dad's "fishing buddies" have gone down to the basement for a "meeting", but never returned? 37 so far. I'm concerned. I seriously have never seen my dad fish. Pretty sure he doesn't own a fishing pole.

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William came home from school and was very tired. He went to the kitchen and got a chocolate bar. Then he died.

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a man walks into a desert Obama is there to greet him and they have a nice chicken dinner

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What did the cow say to the farmer who was driving by in a tractor? MOOOOOOOO!

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How does Stevie Wonder pick up girls? He doesnt, he has someone do it for him

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A guy finds a lamp in the desert and rubs it 3 times.. No genie appears because there is no such thing as Magic.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops