Your Mom

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Two friends are arguing over who is the best pie maker. '' I've made pumpkin, apple, peach, cherry, blueberry, and sweet potato!" " Yeah well I've made all of those AND pecan!'' ''Yeah well have you ever made boysenberry pie?!" "No! What the hell!" *in a calm tone* " Yeah, me neither."

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What's black and red, and covers most of your body? Fourth degree burns. You should say your goodbyes.

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How did the black man survive the Train crash? He didnt, he died liked everyone else

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why do prostitutes do what they do? Because they have abusive fathers who always used them as sex slaves as children

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all these jokes are horrible now

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How do you make a plumber cry? Shit a brick.

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A farmer and his son were walking to the well to fetch some water. The farmer stops, turns to his son and is mauled to death by a lion because they were in Africa.

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What would Michael Jackson do if he were in a room full of kids? Nothing, he's dead.

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Do you like fishsticks No

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What is the best way to burn Jews Light them on fire

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Roses are bright, Violets are sad, I like sprite I'm really struggling for ideas at this point

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What's big and purple? Barney

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Whats worse than a bunch of teen-agers throwing kitrens at my house I didn't save them because I thought they were jehovahs witness's

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What what In the butt

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so 3 guys are a plane George W. Bush, a mexican, and a chinese man. the plane is going down because of too much weight they haave to throw things out. The mexcan throws out a suitcase full of tacos and says "we have enough of this in out country" Then the chinese throws out a suitcase full of rice and says "we have enough of this in out country" Then George W. Bush pushes the mexican out and says "we have to enough of these in out country."

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Why did the airplane crash into the ocean? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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what's worse than than finding a worm up your ass? Death

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1: What is a gum wrapper with no gum? 2: A wrapper? 1: No.

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what do you call a sock that is no longer white a dirty sock

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My son lost his first tooth today...so proud. Took my punch like a champ

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure. why did the refridgerator fall out of the tree? Because it wanted to be a monkey? Why did the John fall out of the tree? Because he has no arms and legs because he suffers from a severe case of lepracy. Why did Timmy fall off his bike? Because he got hit by three monkeys, a fridge and a boy with no limbs.

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YOU AINT GOT NO PANCAKE MIX the preacher then bitchslaps the black man

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Q: What do you call a half-black, half-hispanic man crashing a plane full of innocent people into a building? A: A half-black, half-hispanic man crashing a plane full of innocent people into a building.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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