Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it died.

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Why was Abraham Lincolin President. He was elected by the people of the united states.

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What did the kid say to Santa? Nothing, he was a goat.

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Why did the koala fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second koala fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first koala. Why did the third koala fall out of the tree? He thought it was a game.

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why did the boy eat his lunch money? it was his lunch!

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a white man a black man and an asian man had a few drinks at a bar. they all died from alcohol poisoning

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KKK: Hey i was just comming over here to invite you to a church gathering me and my buddies are having later on tonight, and afterwards we are going to have a big bon-fire to fire up our spirits. Black guy: OK sounds great. White people sure are nice now-a-days.

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Person 1 Hey man what's up Person 2 nothing much I just impregnated your mom

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How do you scare a lawyer? Threaten to kill his family.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: I didn't get to ask. He got hit by a car.

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what has 911 got in commen with most bank robberies? all r inside jobs

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knock knock hold on im takin a poop!

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roses are blue violetrs are green im shooting heroine into my head

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What's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a ferrari? -I don't have a ferrari in my garage.

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Hello, I'm Mark and I have multiple-personality disorder. Don't listen to him, no he doesn't.

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What is yellow, has wheels and lies on its back? A school bus after a horrible traffic accident

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Why does the rabbit go in the hole? because that's where it lives.

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Who is John Galt?

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Roses are red Violets are blue Actually they are not, they are purple. Whoever the uneducated idiot was who made up that poem deserves nothing more then a slap in the face

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*via text message* Me: Hey Trevor! You at home? Trevor: This is Trevor's mom. Trevor committed suicide today.. Me: OMG! Why?!? Trevor: Because when I gave him a glass of water, it had 3 ice cubes. Trevor doesn't like odd numbers.

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What's faster than a Mexican running down the street with your TV? An airplane

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How many people does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One to drop it and die of gas poisoning.

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Why did Bob the Builder die? I threw a fridge at him

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What's funnier than 24? 25.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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