Jesus once got nailed to a cross, beaten and gave his life in order to prove he was immortal. Safe to say, people remain impressed even 2000 years later. Moral: Lol, hey, its quite a feat, but what life did he give if he was immortal? Jesus is a okay dude though, he stole donkeys from stables (for transport) and when his disciples asked if stealing was bad he replied: God will provide for them. Awesome.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What did the old man say to the young man? Nothing, the old man was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

if dave has 50 candy bars and eats 45 what does he have? diabeties.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Q: What do you call a black man's dead bodie? A: A corpse.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Then help me understand Nero, people had the free and legal right to decide to be a part of our, or your society if you prefer, where has that option gone now? Where is the people that choose to believe in their own potential and in the one of their equals? Today we live in a society where its basically pop culture to dislike oneself, where it is considered narcissism to like oneself, and you know that we have both been affected, while those we considered allies before, have joined the same people that branded us evil.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why was the boy crying? His mother has terminal cancer, and his father does not have the financial stability to cover the cost of the surgery and keep up on house payments and buying clothes and food for the children. He will be living in a foster home in a matter of a week.

thumb_up thumb_down

What do you call a dog with no legs? It doesn't matter because he's not gonna come

thumb_up thumb_down

Whats red and looks like a bucket? -a red bucket Whats blue and looks like a bucket? -a red bucket disguised as a blue bucket

thumb_up thumb_down

69

thumb_up thumb_down

What do you call an armless legless man swimming? Dead

thumb_up thumb_down

Why did the computer explode into a million peices? It was thrown off the Empire State building.

thumb_up thumb_down

Why did the gambling addict go into the casino? To use the bathroom

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Your mother is such a whore that she has consensual sex with a lot of people...

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Roses are red Violets are blue Elephants cant jump Neither can amputees

thumb_up thumb_down -12

When I exited the hospital one day, I spotted a sign saying "Come back soon!" Soon afterwards I saw people protesting to ban dihydrogen monoxide. The next day on tv I saw an ad for a solar powered lightbulb. Then I saw a Gun control poster. I cried, this being the dumbest thing I had seen yet, and the world was certainly doomed due to humanity's general stupidity. I saw a chicken crossing a packed road. Why did the chicken feel the urge to cross the road?

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms and she was blind.

thumb_up thumb_down

What happened when Susie fell off the Ferris Wheel? There was an open seat.

thumb_up thumb_down

Why was a white man mowing his lawn ? The lawn was getting undesirably long which provoked the white man.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What does Mickey mouse do every day? Minnie mouse

thumb_up thumb_down +62

So a baby seal walks into a club...

thumb_up thumb_down -5

A priest, a pedophile, and a child rapist walks into a bar. He orders a beer.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

How much wood could a wood chuck chuck, if a wood chuck could chuck oak? Well, If an oatmeal man could oat chuck oat, then a wood oat chucker could chuck oats.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

why did the feminist cross the road? to suck a dick

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why didn't the business man ever wear pants? He didn't have any legs.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops