Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, There are so many different endings to this, it makes me just wanna Shoot Myself!

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David shut the fuck up your cat has asthma and i dropped a weight on its little fucking head that pikey should of drowned it furthermore your sister looks like a greasy alien

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Why couldn't the old man see? Because he was stabbed in the eye.

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How do you make an egg laugh? You can't. Eggs are inanimate objects which are incapable of emotion, thus laughter.

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Whatever tomorrow brings, I'll be there. Just kidding because today brought terminal cancer.

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There are two kinds of people: Those who have a life, and those who read anti-jokes

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Knock Knock : F*ck im watching porn...

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Every time a bell rings, a noise is made.

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Why was the Catholic priest incarcerated? 2 counts of child pornography and 3 counts of sexual abuse with a minor. Since he is now released, he's working as a janitor of an elementary school.

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Why was the black man unemployed and in debt? Because current socio-economic realities and systematic racial discrimination place him at a disadvantage in terms of education and employment. Indeed, it is statistically probable that he was raised below the poverty-line, greatly limiting his opportunities from a young age.

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eh dylan quieres que te trolle de nuevo

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Why did the kitten die? Because your mom is gay.

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What do you call a polar bear in the desert? Bobby Marksson.

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I remember my first beer. It did not taste good to me at the time.

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What's 21 and pregnant? Ariana Grande

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Hi im a joke i eat turtles

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whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? getting your Fallopian tubes ripped out by wolverine

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whats worse than biting into an apple with a worm in it? being raped by justin beiber

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What's the difference between a melon and a baby? You have to cut open the melon before you can eat it

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Whats funny about a blonde, brunette and red-head stranded on an island? Nothing. They are in a very dangerous survival situation, which could prove to be fatal

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a black guy walks into a black bar

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A duck walks up to a lemonade stand, and says nothing. Ducks are incapable of speech and therefore it would be physically impossible for a duck to say anything. Where the duck walks up to does not partake in the matter.

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Every time I walk across the street I do the Hitler march and raise my arm straight out to salute him, if I feel like holding up traffic, I take smaller steps

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Knock Knock Who's there? Your a slut

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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