Why am I telling you this joke? Because the person who did it before me mentioned that he enterted this, agreed to the Terms of Service and clicked submit - but missed out that he also typed in the capcha. Mine said: never quit.

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Roses are red Violets are penis

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What did the passive-aggressive woman do to her husband? She killed him. As it turns out, the slight passive-aggressive behavior she was showing was actually an early warning sign of a dangerous sociopathic mental disorder. The authorities are looking for her as we speak.

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A panda walks into a bar, orders some bamboo shoots, and bamboo leaves, and eats them

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Why did the gay man's ass hurt? He has rectal cancer.

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Why did the cookie go to the doctor? Because he found out the oreo he slept with last night had aids and he wanted to make sure he didnt get the deadly disease so he went to the doctor to get tested.

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why is your grandfather climbing up a pole? hes not

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roses are blue violets are red... i have to use the bathroom

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? NOT SALLY

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What is the difference between a pizza and the Jews? The pizza doesn't scream when you put it in the oven.

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identical jokes get different votes.

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Three guys went barhopping. One slipped and broke his dick.

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There was a man who entered a local paper's pun contest. He sent in ten different puns hoping at least one of the puns would win but, unfortunately, the highest he placed was 4th.

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Knock knock. Who's there? The police, your family is dead.

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream? Because he saw a Vladimir Putin.

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Three jews walk into a bar. The bar is hosting a bar mitzvah.

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Harry to Voldemort: Your mother is so fat, her patronus is a cake!

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Your mother is so fat that I'm starting to worry about her health.

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What do you call someone who kills their own children? Casey Anthony

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What's funnier A Ginger or a fat kid A fat ass ginger

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why did the mexican cross the road? To get into America. Why did the chicken cross the road? It was on its way to warn everyone that the sky was falling Why did the horse go to the other side of the field? He liked green grass. Why did Chuck Norris cross the road? cause he's Chuck Norris. Why did the man get a check in the mail every month? Cause he's black Why did Obama Cross the road? Cause he lost control of congress why is there all this blank space?

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What did the Penis say to the Condom? Nothing. The human organ is not able to talk to another inanimate object, therefore it's impossible.

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Why were the kids screaming? They were being chased by a giant ferocious spiny lobster.

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How many dollies does little Suzie have? Enough to kill 15 men

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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