A man walks into a bar. Ow

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Ken: Your dog is sick, he needs to see a vet. Megan: Omg, what is it? Ken: It's a medical person who treats animals.

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A man is walking in the desert, alone and lost, when suddenly he finds a lamp. The man picks up the lamp and to his surprise, a genie bursts out of the lamp ! The genie says to the man: "Thank you, kind man! You have freed me from this prison I have been in for a million years. I am in your dept and will grant you three wishes." The man replies: "Wow, you've been in there for a million years and all you have to give me are three wishes?" The genie was really sad to hear of the man's lack of appreciation and flew away, leaving the man. The man eventually died of starvation and dehydration.

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Why do people laugh at the number 69? Honestly I don't know, its just a number isn't it?

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what do you think when you see someone throw a man with no arms and legs into the ocean? chances of survival are minimal

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What's the difference between a hundred dead babies and a porsche? A porsche is a car.

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A jew goes into a church. Yolo.

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Wha'ts the difference between Justin Beiber and a piece of hot muff garbage? Fart triscuits.

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Q. What is Black, White, and Red all over?? A. A girl just having sex and her Cherry broke all over your dick..

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(Mortal Kombat Annihilation) Princess Kitana: "Mother, you're alive" Sindel: "Too bad you, will die" (Troll 2) "They're eating her. And then they're gonna me. Oh my gawwwwwwwwd." (The Room) Johnny: I did not hit her, it's not true! It's bullshitt! I did not hit her! [throws water bottle] Johnny: I did *not*. Oh hi, Mark. Mark: Oh, hey Johnny, what's up?

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Cum on guys....gay jokes are mean

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Two blonds walk into a building....they couldnt see it.

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What does pooh bear call his grandma? Pooh nanny.

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Knock, knock. Whose there? Tits. Tits, who? SUCK EM'!

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Ross Tumilty is gay 8===D

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What do you call two Mexicans playing basketball? Two young men ignoring societies expectations of them and instead choosing to play the sport they enjoy the most.

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Your mom is so fat that she has high cholesterol. Moral: I AM NOT CRAZY! Said the man to the dog.

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Roses are red violets are blue you better run I see you

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a couple argue and spend the night 96ing each other

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How to you get a clown off a swing? You shoot it in the face.

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Q: what smells like cheese and tastes like cheese? A: cheese

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What do you call red eyes in the dark? A high black man

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Two penguins, sitting in a bath tub. One says, "Pass the soap!" The other says, "What do you think I am?! A clock?"

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How do you you know when you haven't slept in a while? You're tired.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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