whats blue and doesnt like cheese? the sky, i was only messing about the cheese

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What came first the chicken or the egg? Neither, chickens have been extinct since 1987.

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what did the homeless man say to the stranger? nothing, he let he let his gun do the talking

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Kid: "Tell me about when you were young, Grandpa." Grandpa: "Oh, sonny, those were crazy times. My friends and I were out of control. We used to give each other wet-willies and funny arm. We'd play dandy-balls and legs-a-spread and penis-butt." Kid: "Sounds kind of gay, Grandpa. " Grandpa: "It was gay. Everyone was. But, back then, we were called pole-fancies. It was real, good old-fashioned "grab the nearest tree and hold on for dear life" gay, not today's fancy, featherbed, thread-count gay. People got hurt back then! Kid "That's gay." Grandpa: "Yeah, it was pretty gay "

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Whats worse than falling down the stairs? Falling UP the stairs.

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Me: f*** off Asshole: YOUR MOM! Me: -is dead.

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Somebody stole my goat, now I can't enter it in the fair

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chickens are not very intelligent and was scared by a shadow. The chicken's survival instincts caused it to cross the road, away from the shadow. The chicken crossed the road safely, and is now happily pecking at worms.

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You know you're dyslexic when life gives you melons.

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What's big, white, and kills niiggers? Hurricane sandy

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A young blind boy is being tucked into bed by his mother. The mom says "Now Billy, pray really hard tonight and tomorrow, your wish will come true!". Billy says, "Ok mommy." and goes to sleep. The next morning, Billy wakes up and screams "MOMMY! I'm still blind, my wish didn't come true!", the mom answered, "I know - April Fools!"

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- Why Justin Bieber can't login to Facebook? - Because he forgot the password.

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what's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding several worms in your apple.

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Why did little Billy fall off his bike? Anwser: because a refridgator hit him.

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What did Goldilocks say to the three bears? She asked them how bears make porridge without opposable thumbs.

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I like my coffee the same way I like my women: without a penis!

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what's the difference between a blonde and a mosquito? when you slap a mosquito it stops sucking:)

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What do you call a cow in the grass... A cow in the grass... Dumbas*

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The day after Christmas a chain-smoker, a sex addict, and an alcoholic go to the doctor. The doctor tells the three friends that they need to quit their addiction or they will die. R.I.P. Tommy, Jacob, and Winston 1/1/2011

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What do you get when you cross a Poodle with a cupcake? Stop looking at these anti-jokes and get back to work.

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One day, Little Timmy asked his mother this question, "Mommy, why are boys and girls different?" She responded, "You're adopted and Santa Claus is dead."

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A baby seal walks into a club.

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How did the hot blonde get a promotion from her boss? She worked really hard and achieved more thaan her coworkers.

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a man walks into a gay bar. he was gay.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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