What's green and has wheels? A cucumber with wheels.

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my uncle used to tickle me.. he's in prison for child abuse

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My life is a dream in of itself.. inception???

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Neil Lewis

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a white guy walks into a black guy bar who walks out. A. half black half white baby.

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Why did the little boy throw his clock out of the window? After hours of searching for the snooze button to no avail, the little boy became so irritated at the incessant ringing of the alarm that he threw it out of his window in a fit of rage. The clock landed on an old woman who was walking twenty stories below. She was immediately killed on impact.

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A guy walks into a bar. NOT!

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Knock! Knock! Who's there? Banana. Banana who? Knock! Knock! Who's there? Banana. Banana who? Knock! Knock! Who's there? Orange. Orange who? Orange you glad this joke is over?

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Whats the difference between a baby and a bowling ball? I dont have a bowling ball stapled to my tree

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8====D {(0)}

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My penis is big... not.

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What did the ocean say to the beach? Nothing, oceans and beaches are both not alive, thus incapable of speech and feeling emotions

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Two tomatoes were crossing a road when one of them got hit by a truck. The other said, Carrot.

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What do you call two Muslims flying an airplane? Pilots

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A black guy and a white guy jump out of a tree, who hits the ground first? They both hit at the same time while sustaining minor injuries.

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What's black and white and red all over? A dead penguin

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Why did Hitler shoot himself? Because he found out Chuck Norris was a Jew.

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All work and no play makes Johnny successful in his field of interest.

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Q: why did the plain crash A: because the driver was a loaf of bread

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Guess What! HI!

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A boy walks into his friend's house for a party. While he waits for his friends to return from the bar he realizes there are many people waiting in different lines for various kinds of drinks. After his friends return he decides he does not want any of the carbonated drinks they had ordered, instead he chooses to wait in the fruit punch line. There is no punch line.

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What has tomato Sauce And came from italy? Pizza

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A blonde, brunette, and a redhead walk into a bar. The redhead, growing tired of the constant ridicule directed at her from the other two, kills them. She pleads guilty to 3rd degree murder on two counts and is sentenced two life sentences in a maximum security prison in Cambodia.

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Lady Gaga didn't have anything to wear to the playboy party.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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