If you are riding a horse, how many watermelons does it take to kill a giraffe? Platypus.

A man crawled up to a water fountain but fell because he had no legs

What did the black kid get for his birthday? A bike, just what he asked for.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't

Jim and Larry work together. Jim works hard, and Larry is a bit of a prankster. One day, Jim is having a rather rough day, and Larry looks to cheer him up with a good-natured joke. Knowing that Jim's wife prepares dinner for him every night of the week, he calls her and tells her that their boss has decided to pay for a dinner out, that she should take the day off and just get ready for Jim to come home and pick her up. Larry will later follow up by calling a pizza delivery place and having them send a special no hard feeling message with two large delicious pizzas. He forgets to call the pizza delivery man until later that night, after which it's too late and he thinks "I'll just explain the joke to Jim tomorrow." And goes peacefully to sleep. Arriving home and finding that dinner is not prepared, Jim savagely beats his wife.

Chantelle, I loved you, but you cheated with Johnathan from Church...

"bluar blah blah blarRR/ the stupid pointless part" dead people/ animals/ objects can't talk/ drive/ operate compueter, lol I'm so focken funni

Whats gay and smells like paint? A gay man covered in paint.

I am the sun. You are the moon.

Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven was black.

What is the result of a couples' feud? 96.

An Irish man walks into a bar, and then realizes that he's walked into the wrong establishment (He was looking for an upscale restaurant.)

What do you do when there is a truck on the interstate? Nothing.

chuck norris's tears cure cancer, to bad chuck norris never cries

Three kids are standing on a corner. They have red hair, blue hair, and green hair respectively. A man asks the kid with red hair "How did you get your hair red?" The kid replies, "I dyed it." The man then asks the kid with blue hair, "How did you get your hair blue?" The kid replies, "I dyed it." The man finally asks the kid with green hair, "How did you get your hair green?" The kid wipes his hand across his nose, gathering green slime and replies, "I dyed it."

What do you call a dead black guy? A TERRIBLE CRIME

A man and a chicken walk into a bar... I forgot the rest of the joke .... YOUR MUMS A WHORE

Women's Rights

Why am I writing this? Cuz I am eating babies alive right now!

black people - basketball rednecks- nascar mexicans- soccer asians- uuuuuh I don't know can i get a hint

An English man a Scotts man and an Irish man buy a helicopter between them,they go to pick it up after paying for it and realise that non of them can fly it. so they get a refund and go to the pub.

Q. What did the dog say to the cat? A. Ruff.

What did the cat say to another ? meow

What's long, brown, and runs across a family's backward? A fence.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...