Two guys walk into a bar... They sat down, had a few drinks and left without any incident.

whats worse then 9/11? -George W. Bush

Im gay What about you

A black guy, a mexican, and a jew walk in a bar. The mexican had to go to the bathroom. He asked the bartender where the bathroom was and she directed him down the hall where he pooped in quietly.

What starts with a J, and burned in the oven? My Jumbalaya, i left it in for too long...

Help iv fallen and i can get up -blarg

Q: What did hitler say to his generals? a: In a circumstance as the one we have found ourselves in. Eliminating our most threatening of enemies would be very logical. Unless they were of the superior race therefore, it may be frowned apon by our low ranked comrades. Causing another assasionation attempt on myself. So in conclusion I believe eliminating a rich and intelligent race far more superior than our own, would be the best way to go. So collect the Jews of Warsaw and we might have a chance.

Why do gay guys like push pops? Because they are a delicious lollipop treat.

What do you call a person rolling down a hill, in a burning car, with a pack of wolves running after him? DEAD!

A dyslexic man walks into a bra

What did the pear say to the orange? Orange ya gonna say hi? What did the apple say to the banana? Nothing, apples can't talk.

Why did the sloth cross the road? To slaughter your entire family.

Q: Why did they laugh at the black guy? A: He told a funny joke.

Jack just got his new yellow bicycle. His dad got it for his 12th anniversary. Jack was ecstatic to ride it down his street for the first time. He immediately called his friends Paul and Erick and went for his first ride. The neighbors were in AWE when they saw Jack taking off on his new ride. That day the three friends had one of the best day of their young lives, they went up to the lake, had some peanut ice cream and made fun of Alexia. Jack was in love with his new bike and euphoric that they were reunited and did all their favorite things with an incredible amount of passion. Erick hated his new bike.

Why was Uncle Monty's head damn tasty? Because he shoved it up a horses arse when it needed a shit.

Why can't Bin laden drive because he's dead

Me and my pet lion just took a trip to his homeland of africa. It is also worthwhile to note I'm a chronic liar.

Why was the man upset? Both sides of his pillow were warm.

What's worse than the holocaust? Jewish people!

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Being ripped apart by an angry orangatang because orangatangs have the strength of ten men.

Q: What did jerry sandusky do with little boys alone? A: Teach them how to play football

Which came first the chicken or the egg? The egg. Chickens evolved from their pre-historic ancestors who each laid an egg with a slight genetic mutation until one egg contained what is now classified as the modern chicken.

Why did you step on my watermelon?

Q: What's long and brown? A: The unemployment line.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...