What's one plus one? 2. Two legit, two legit to quit, hey, hey... What's one plus two? 3. Easy as abc, 123, abc, baby you and me. What's one plus three? 4. hes a jolly good fellow, for he's a jolly good fellow.

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So there is a muslum, then he flew a plane into a building and died a sudden death. But he was wearing a helmet.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Your bipolar aunt so don't ask again.

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A man walks into a bar his alcoholism is tearing his family apart

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because Macy's was having a giant sale.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? because he had legs.

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What did the monkey say to the Pope and the Queen? Good evening, Your Holiness. Good evening, Your Majesty,

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A black man, a white man and a Mexican walk into a bar. They have a beer, enjoy some pleasant conversation, then go home to their families.

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why did the girl like dick? Because Dick was a nice boy.

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why aren't doughnuts square? because they are round

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roses are red, violets are blue... thats what they tell me because im blind

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What did the horse say to the farmer who tried to feed him hay soup? I don't like that.

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Whats worse than forgetting some thing at the supermarket? your nuts being nail gunned to the wall.

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What's smaller then a midget? A baby midget.

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A man walks into a bar. After several hours of drinking and loud unintellegable outbursts to those around him, the man wonders off to a nearby bus stop and relieves himself. He is now a registered sex offender.

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What has hands but isn't alive? A dead person.

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Why did the airplane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

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What's worse than being hit by a mini van? Being hit by 5 mini vans.

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anti joke What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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i like turtals and kids

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Why would Bill Clinton like Jess so much? Cause he has a vagina, smells like shit, and has cankles.

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Why do everytime I go to toilet for number 2. I look into the toilet to see if this one's nicer than the last one.

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So I was walking down the street the other day, I went to the shop.

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What do you call a blind fish? Amblyopsidae.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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