You tell your mom she's a bitch and she later commits suicide by shooting herself in the head . Now, what's the only thing ductape can't fix? Your moms skull.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Knock Knock Come in.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

roses are red, violets are blue, charcoal is black, and my neighbor is too.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Knock knock Who's there? Owl Owl who? Owl Johnson, your neighbor. Oh hi Owl, please come in.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Which came first the chicken or the egg? The egg because if a chicken came first then that means chickens magically appeared. Eggs however may change over time through evolution by a common ancestor because after millions of years of hatching, it slowly mutated by natural selection and became to what is now known as the domestic chicken. (Applause)

thumb_up thumb_down -10

boobs

thumb_up thumb_down -25

A man walks into a bar gets hurt and falls over

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What is worse but similar to Jenga? The September 11th attacks.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What do you call a blonde doctor? Doctor

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Don't you hate it when you're reading a sentence and it doesn't end how you testicles. _._._

thumb_up thumb_down +2

funniest joke ever!!!!!.....chris.

thumb_up thumb_down -49

*Knock knock* Who's there? Stab.

thumb_up thumb_down

The elephant and the mouse was gonna go swimming at the lake, but they realize the Elephant forgot his swimming trunks! Mouse: Do you really need two trunks? Elephant: Oh well I can do with this one... but its not a swimming trunk! Mouse: Huh? Moral: Huh?

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Yo mamas so fat she hates her life and the example she sets for her children.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why can't the blonde dial 911? Because she's being held hostage against her will.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks why the long face? The horse, unable to comprehend human speech, promptly craps on the floor and leaves.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Roses are red Violets are blue Faces like yours being in a zoo But don't worry I'll be there too Behind the bars, laughing at you

thumb_up thumb_down -8

How do you stop the neighbors kids jumping your fence and stealing your lemons? Molest them.

thumb_up thumb_down +68

There are fewer coppers on sundays. As well as criminality.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

How many Polacks does it take to change a lightbulb? Two, one to change the lightbulb, one to hold the ladder.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Why did 3 blacks guys start watching the first Star Wars movie on Saturday night? They finished the Back to the Future movies on Friday.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

A girl is talking with her boyfriend - God, you're selfish!!! - No, i sell meat.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why was the muslim surprised? A tyrannosaurus rex bit off his legs.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Q: Why did the monkey climb a tree? A: To avoid predators.

thumb_up thumb_down +48

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops