My friend said that onions are the only food that could make you cry. That was before I hit him with a watermelon.

What is a man? A misserable little pile of shi... Moral: What is a man?

What do you do when your baby won't stop crying. Slit its throat

2 wales are at the bar one looks at the other and dose a wale call for 5 long minutes and the other one reply's "dude your drunk we got to go"

why did the man fall off his unicycle? because he was dead

Ask me if I'm a tree. "Are you a tree?" Of course not.

What starts with P and ends with O-R-N? Popcorn

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I'm a schizophrenic, and so am I.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Although this is a highly improbable scenario, one would assume that, being a chicken, it did not have much of an intuitive idea as to what to do while it was stray for whatever reason in an urbanized area. Considering chickens do not harbor nearly as much of a mental capacity as it would require to even comprehend the concept of a "road" and is impervious to the idea of oncoming traffic and such, the fact that it happened to be crossing the road was in fact not even recognized by the chicken. For this reasons I deem this question unanswerable.

why was the boy laying on the ground? he got shot in the head

What do you call a fly without wings? A rather unfortunate physical disability

Yo momma so stupid she threw a rock at the ground And missed.

Why did the spider cross the road? He was stuck to the bottom of my shoe!

Trees are my friends because they welcome me with open limbs.

Why did the man go to the barber? To get a haircut

Why didnt the boy finish the race? Becuase he stepped on a land mine.

Hey, I just met you and i am crazy, but? here's my room key let's make a baby.

why do black people like basketball? because it envolves running shooting and stealing

How did jimmy get hurt?? someone throw a fridge at him..

four score and seven years ago. . sharks with frickn laser beams attached to their FRICKeN HEADs.

why did the kid drop his ice cream? Because he got hit by the ice cream van

Bible Fact0idz: "Something Drink my blood and consume my flesh and live forever something" Jesus- dead age 30something alcoholism liver problems and diabeetus at time of death, crucified and not been seen since, return pending? Classified Alcoholic. Moral: "YOU CANT HANDLE THE TRUTH!"

Jesus, Mohammed, and Moses all walk into a bar. They sit down at a table and glare at each other before turning to watch the baseball game. They support opposing teams.

Why did the pineapple cry? It didn't, because it's a pineapple.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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