Knock knock "Steve I have a door bell."

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding out it's an orange

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Why did the man walk instead of taking the bus? Because he felt like getting a heathy workout.

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penis

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Why can't blondes change a lightbulb? Because they're women

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What does a Jewish woman do to keep her hands soft and her nails long Nothing at all

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Want to hear a funny joke? Not really.

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a guy gets knocked out and wakes up in a alley all bloody and a knife next to him!!!

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What did the man say after he was shot? Nothing, because the bullet hit the man with so much impact that he instantly died and was unable to talk at the current time. Others in the surrounding area walked by as if nothing was there.

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What's the difference between a pizza and a black man A pizza can feed a family of four

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what did Tim do when he got married? He kissed the bride Mecheoo LOVES ASS

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I walked into the cactus store. The clerk there was being mean so I called him a "prick". ...........

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What do you call cheese that's not yours? Not your cheese.

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BRANDON LUI ROCKSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS

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Hey dude, wanna come with me!!!! Sure, where? ON YOUR FACE!!!!!! -_- ........ok sure why not

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Why did ned fall out of the tree? Because he was hit by a koala.

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There are three men in a canoe traveling upstream. One wheel falls off. How many pancakes fit in a doghouse? 9, because ice-cream has no bones.

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Boy: whats for dinner Kidnapper: beans and weiners

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Why did the guy throw a clock out of his window? Because he had mental issues.

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Roses are red violets are blue tulips are purple/pink

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why did the mexican cross the road? To get into America. Why did the chicken cross the road? It was on its way to warn everyone that the sky was falling Why did the horse go to the other side of the field? He liked green grass. Why did Chuck Norris cross the road? cause he's Chuck Norris. Why did the man get a check in the mail every month? Cause he's black Why did Obama Cross the road? Cause he lost control of congress why is there all this blank space?

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Lightening never strikes the same place twice. But it killed both my parents.

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Q: How do you get a giraffe into a refrigerator? A: You open the door put the giraffe in and the close the door. Q: How do you get an elephant into a refrigerator? A: You open the door to the refrigerator take the giraffe out then put the elephant in and close the door. Q: The Lion King is hosting an animal conference, all the animals attend but one, which one is it? A: The elephant it's in the fridge Q: You have to cross a river that is inhabited by crocodiles how do you cross it? A: You swim across, the crocodiles are at the animal conference.

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Q: What do you call a Jew in space? A: An astronaut you racist bastard!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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