whats worse than gill? nothing

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My trip to Italia: Italian most: WELCOME TO ITAAAAAAALIA! YOU WANT THE PIZZA YES? Me asking my then Italian girlfriend: Are all Italians so loud? Then girlfriend: Yeah kinda... Her brother overhearing us: WHO! GAVE! YOU THE BALLS! TO JUDGE US! Me: Uh I am just surprised at... Her bro: I SAID WHO GAVE YOU THE BALLS... DONT LOOK AT ME! Me: *looking down at the ground somewhat ashamed* bro: LOOK AT ME WHEN I SPEAK TO YOU! NO! DONT LOOK AT ME! I will let you go for this time yes? Next time I will take you outside and beat you up okay? LOOK AT ME WHEN I SPEAK TO YOU! AND DO NOT LOOK AT ME! Conclusion: Wow you Italians are bad ass... I mean hell this is was a real life experience of mine, I was just a teen back then but I got a headache and threw up ending up in bed later... Fact: I am nearly two meters but walk with a hunch, the guy was half my size but still broke me down, wow Italians are bad ass...

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person: Ask me if i'm a tree other person: are you a tree? person: no

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all the kids had fun

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A barman walks into a bar. He works there.

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Why doesn't Caillou have hair? Because he has cancer.

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why was the water bottle empty? because bob drank it. stupid bob...

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penus

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Why did Billy cross the road? Because Billy wasn't wearing his seatbelt.

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What did PSY say about his newest song? Probably something in Korean.

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What do you call a person with no arms, legs, and teeth singing in the middle of the street while spinning? I don't know.

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What do you call a black hitch-hiker? Stranded

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Stop looking at these jokes and go fuck yourself.

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What did the little girl say after her dad hit her? Nothing. She was a month old and died instantly.

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Q: Why did the purple cantalope eat the curtains at midnight? A: Sassafrass.

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What did the black man get for Kwanza? AIDS

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Whats black and white and red / read all over * a bloody penquin * nun falling down the slairs * news paper * a clumsey panda

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John went to the shop to purchase a can of coca cola. He left the shop with a can of coca cola.

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Q: What do you call a black man running for congress? A: Congressional Candidate

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why do you put a baby in the blender feet first to see its expression

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A new family have moved in next to me. They have three little kids and they've challenged me to a water fight in the back yard, so I'm just writing this while I'm waiting for the kettle to boil

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My girlfriend wanted to talk about her feelings ... SO I TOLD THAT BITCH THAT... i really loved her and care about her feelings

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-What did George Clooney say to Jennifer Lawrence? -"Hi!"

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What's worse than 100 dead babies stapled to a wall? 100 live babies stapled to the wall!!!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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