What's the difference between a Jew and a canoe? One is a person of Jewish descent and the other is a device for traversing waterways akin to the raft.

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Suzie!

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Why did the Mexican fall off of a cliff? He lost is ballence.

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Psychic wanted. You know where to apply.

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How do you make a plumber sad? You kill his family.

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What do you call a Muslim flying a plane? A pilot.

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why did the grinch steal christmas? The grinch had a rough childhood. he had an abusive father and a crack cocaine addicted mother, and as a result, the grinch never got a christmas of his own. The grinch steals the happiness of christmas from the who's becuase his horrible childhood has caused him to take his anger out on everyone around him, because the grinch believes that this will make up for his depressing childhoofd

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Roses are niggas Violets are niggas I'm lil Wayne niggas rhymes with niggas

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Knock knock who is there ? i'm an orphaned, sir can you tell me why did you write who "is" instead of who's ?? because than i will have to use the (') key and its very far not to mention that i have to use the shift key do u want a pizza ? how much ? 50 cents ? get the hell out ? im not even in yet !

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What's white and flies around ? A seagull. What's black and flies around ? A seagull in the darkness.

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Why do you have to write a conclusion at the end of your paper? So people dont have to read the whole thing.

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But there's a sound Dumbledore knows... What does the Fawkes say?

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what makes white men feel embarrassed and and ashamed? when they find out their girllfriend has been sleeping with a black man.

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How do you kill a baby? You take a gun and shoot it.

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There once was a man from Peru. Who dreamed he was eating his shoe. I shot him in the head. With a bullet made of lead. And now he's dead. No more shoe ingestion

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what do you get when you have unprotected sex with a hooker? an orgasm

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There are four worms moving in a straight line, one in front of the other. The first worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me!" The second worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" The third worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" The third worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" How can this be? ...the fourth worm lied.

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There once was a beautiful princess named Snow White who lived with seven dwarves in the forest. One day, and old hag approached her and offered her an apple. She bit into the apple, chewed, and said,"Wow, that's tasty. Is this a Golden Delicious?" The hag said, "Why yes, it is. I have a private orchard. Perhaps I'll let you see it some time." The two promptly resumed their lives.

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Why couldn't people tell the difference between the two twins? Because they were indentical.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Somebody pushed it

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Why did the boy fail the math test? He has a learning disability.

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Why did little Timmy fall off his bike? His pace maker failed.

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Justin Bieber walked into a strip club. Selena Gomez wasn't there.

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why didn't the chicken cross the road? It was very unhealthy, and had a heart attack attempting too

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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