What do you call an awesome school? St Heinrich's Law School (Teaching you to break the laws!)

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Why did the man cross the road? His mother had recently passed away after a 12 year battle with lung cancer and is visiting her tombstone.

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Why was little David sad? His father got hit by a truck.

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Knock Knock Who's there The military. We're under attack. The military we're under attack who? Dinos

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What the kid with no arms get for christmas? A baseball and a glove to go through with his dad

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Who lived in a pineapple under the sea?

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A man walks into a bar. He leaves when he realizes he is supposed to be at a business meeting

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Why did the jew tie his shoes? because his shoes were untied

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Knock Knock!! Who's there? Dyphis, say goodbye to your kids.

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Why did the bird fall out of the sky, It hit one of the random green pipes.

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Roses Are Red, Violets Are Blue, My Heart Skips A Beat, When I Think Of You! :D

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Your Momma is so fat when she pressed "up" on the elevator it went crashing down.

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why didnt the llama eat the string bean? Becuz he was a vegetarian

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What did the man say to his wife? We are both men. Apart from you.

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what do you do when you see a black man limping across your frontyard? you stop laughing an reload.

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Why are there so many black basketball players? Because they aren't green.

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Why did the boy fall out of the tree? This is no time to make insensative jokes you dick, Billy's on a hospital bed.

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What did the bartender say to the man? can i have a beer if you dont get it the bartender asked the customer for a beer

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What starts with "m" and rhymes with monkey? Platypus

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What happens when u mix water and soda? You get watery soda

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What do blondes do when they hurt themselves ? They say "Ow", just like anyone else.

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A white police officer pulled over a black guy on the highway. The cop asked him for license and registration. The black guy had a tail light out, and was very polite and cooperative. The two became close friends, but then one night, the black guy went to the house of the white cop. The black guy brought his wife and daughter over for a dinner party, eating grilled turkey sandwiches with mayonnaise. When the cop's attractive wife asked the black guy if he would like some fresh watermelon from the patch in their back yard, he respectfully declined, for he needed to return to his own home to patiently wait for a business call from one of his employees, who was also a very intelligent and hard working African male. Once home, the black guy turned on his stereo, to listen to some calming country music at an appropriately low level of volume, as his daughter and wife had gone to sleep, for the wife also had work in the morning, at her law firm, and her daughter had a job interview after her day of classes at Dartmouth were out for the day... then Martin Luther King Jr. woke up from his dream, and was soon thereafter assassinated.

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Why did the fish cross the road? Because fish don't have legs and can't walk anywhere

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What do you call a prostitute with no arms and legs? Unfortunate, as they've probably have many misfortunes in life.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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