Why was the boy late for class? He was late because he got stabbed and left in the bathroom.

Why is there so much hate in the world? Because you touch yourself at night.

What did the unintelligent sports jock say to the band geek. Hey.

Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

What did one wall say to the other? Nothing. Walls can't talk.

A man is walking down the street and sees a women sat on the pavement crying, he walks over to her and asks "what's wrong?" to which the women replies "it doesn't matter" the women then walks away as she did not want to share private information with a stranger.

Why was the jewish boy sad? He had no friends.

Have you seen Helen Keller's new car? Neither has Stevie Wonder.

What's Pink And Fluffy? Pink Fluff.

sarah taylor

a man walks off of a damn. a damn is not a noun, thus nobody can walk off it

Q. Whats black and red all over? A. A black wall thats been painted red.

Did you hear about the guy who fell off the mountain? Oh, well he died

Why did I have sex with your mom? Because she was a beautiful individual with a fine taste in the classical arts. She also offered me a ride to her place for a delicious 3 course meal. Afterwards our romance blossomed and we decided to have sexual intercourse to show our mutual appreciation for each other.

A man goes to the doctor's office. The doctor says, "I have some bad news, and some worse news. The bad news is you have alzheimer's. The worse news is you have cancer." The man breaks down in tears.

Bloody kids ...

What do gay guys eat? Normal food like every other human being.

What did the egg say to the cup? I love your hairdo! Girl, who is your stylist?

What is worse than 10 dead babies in a trash can? 1 dead baby in 10 trash cans

Do you know what is worse than getting kicked downstairs? Getting kicked upstairs because then you could fall downstairs and break your skull.

a jew, a gay, and an irishman walk int a bar at different times during the span of 5 hours.

What happened to the prisoner who dropped the soap while in the shower with other men? Another prisoner picked up and gave it to him and finished showering and felt squeaky clean.

How many Mexicans does it take to change a light bulb? Probably just one.

What did the collage professor say to the plumber? Hi.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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