Q: Why is Santa's sack so big? A: Because he only cums once a year

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Whats worse than bitting into a apple and finding a worm? Being the worm who just lost nearly half his whole house because some jerk decided to eat an apple on the ground, whom after eating the apple destroyed the worms self-esteem by making the comparison to the worse thing possible. Or being raped by Zeus in the form of a worm.

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Why did the black man get arrested? Because he was in possession of powder cocaine, which is a schedule I narcotic in the United States. This incident probably would not have happened if an end was put to the war on drugs, which is notorious for disproportionately targeting blacks and other minority groups, even though whites are statistically more likely to use such substances.

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What do you call a man with no arms or legs? His name.

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What do you call an attractive woman in a blender? A very rare occurrence.

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A blind man walks in a bar I mean like a metal bar But it didn't hurt He only laught

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boobs.

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Two parrots were sitting on a perch. The older one turned to the younger one and said "do you smell fish?" The younger one paused for a bit, and replied "do you smell fish?" Their owner had been talking about fish.

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why are black people always so funny because they think of funny jokes

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Q: Why do black people buy so many pairs of shoes? A: Because when they outgrow there old pair they need new shoes.

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This guy says: "Doctor doctor, it hurts when I do this!" He jiggles his arm and screames in pain. The doctor replies: "Well, don't do it then!"

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Let's make like your mother and walk out on your family during pre-adolescence.

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What's green and has wheels? Grass, I lied about the wheels.

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Why did the Indian have a hard time getting a hotel room? He didn't. He owned the hotel.

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Why did the kids put pirahnas in Mr. Hermann's fish tank? So they could eat him.

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i feel like when the radish was discovered someone was like "hey lets call it rad!" and another guy was like "lets dial it down a bit"

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what happened to your carpool? they died.

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A dog walks into a bar, animal control is called and he is put down as he is suffering from rabies.

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What happened to the boy who cried wolf? He was brutally raped and killed, Inglewood is really not a place you want your children growing up.

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What do you call a black man in a suit? A lawyer.

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A man walks into a bar. The ceiling was ringed with dozens of TV’s, much like your average sports bar. Unlike your average sports bar however, the TV’s were not featuring athletic competition. That is unless you consider vigorous and explicit gay sex between men hung like Tijuana mules to be a sport.

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Why did Hitler cross the road? To get to the other side.

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Where was sally during the bombing? Everywhere!

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Roses are red Violets are blue This line doesn't rhyme Neither does this one.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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