- Anti Joke

What came first... the chicken or the egg? How am I supposed to know?

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: So it could get hit by a car, to prove that chickens have free will, and have every right to cross a road without any particualar reason.

what's the difference between a chicken and a grape? They're both purple........ except for the chicken

Roses are red Violets are blue Theres a crazy ass alpaca ready to take a shit on you

There are three men in a canoe traveling upstream. One wheel falls off. How many pancakes fit in a doghouse? 9, because ice-cream has no bones.

Guy 1: Hey, did you hear about this blind guy who went bungee jumping off a bridge? Guy 2: No, what happened? Guy 1: He couldn't see Jack!

a kid named austin walks into school and gets kicked in the nuts byyy

() () () () () () () ------ __________ yo can go %$*# yourself =~~ 0

Q: Whats funny about the Holocaust A: Nothing

what does the nba stand for? Nothing But Africans

i felt like burning some calories so i lit a fat kid on fire

Selena Gomez, Victoria Justice, and Arianna Grande walk into a bar. They were making a movie.

What's disabled and red all over. The kid I hit with my car.

what do you get when you combine an astronaut, a microwave and a bathtub? A suicide investigation

Knock knock! Who's there? Alzheimer's. Alzheimer's who? Knock knock!

One day, an Irishman, a Jew and an American were walking home from a long game of golf. "God, that was a long game" said the American, to which the Irishman replied "aye, that it was." The Irishman then turned to the Jew, and asked him how he managed to get two birdies in succession. The Jew, after a moment of deliberation, began to explain. "Well, it all began when I was six. See, there was a mountain right next to Casparia, the village I lived for most of my life back in Wales. Every day, I'd come back from school, and ask my dad why nobody ever attempted to scale the mountain. 'To do so would be an unnecessary risk, son, and people are too busy working to put food and water on the tables for their families to undertake something so foolish.' One night, when insomnia was getting the better of me, I decided to get a better look at the mountain, so I strapped on my boots, my fur coat and some woolly mittens and left for the mountain. After a few hours of walking, I approached the closest hill which gave me a perfect view of the mountain's first peak, and there I spotted a polar bear, mauling a hiker to death." The Jew paused to check the Irishman and the American were following, when the American spoke up; "hold on there, there aren't any polar bears in Casparia!" The Irishman also spoke up; "there isn't even a village called Casparia, well, anywhere!" The Jew smiled slightly, and a few seconds later the smile broke out into a gigantic grin, and he finally replied: "exactly".

What did one wall say to the other? Nothing. Walls can't talk.

How do you rape someone? No, its a question. I don't know the best way to go about this.

Whats the difference between a bad skydiver and a bad golfer? The bad golfer looses the game, drives home, and falls asleep. The bad skydiver dies in a terrible accident.

The WNBA

roses are red violets are blue pornhubs down your mums facebook will do.

What did Timmothy get when he got back from his vacation in a tropical destination? Malaria.

david weres the slug gone

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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