Q: What's the difference between a trampoline and a baby? A: I take off my shoes when I jump on a trampoline.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why did the blonde ask her doctor if she could get a new butt? She is insecure about its appearance and believes reconstructive anus surgery is the only solution.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Whats the best part about having sex with 25 year olds? There 20 of them.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Roses are red, violets are violet. I'm not stupid.

thumb_up thumb_down +54

why was the tricycle lonely? the mom back over the kid in the driveway.

thumb_up thumb_down

Find the I in the iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiIiIiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii

thumb_up thumb_down -11

How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Poke her face.

thumb_up thumb_down +63

telll someone to ask u if u are a tree then say nooooooo

thumb_up thumb_down +3

A bear just broke into my house and im scared…...... Oh wait thats just my 350 pound teacher… now i'm even scareder

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Justin Port#$ falls out of a tree. What happens? he breaks his neck and unfortually dies a long painful death.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

What's black & sits at the top of the staircase? A quadriplegic after a house fire.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

roses are red, violets are blue, I have schizophrenia, which is a serious mental disorder in which I have difficulty properly experiencing reality. It should not be confused with multiple personality disorder, which is a completely different disease with different symptoms.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What's purple and glows? An electric grape

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Whats worse then 15 missed calls from your mom?, The Holocaust

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Three peasants were brought in front of the King to be rewarded for their assistance during a drought. The King told them that they could each request one thing from him that he could provide. The first man asked to be rich, so the King ordered his guards to fetch a large sack that was filled to the brim with gems and gold pieces. The man thanked the King and left his palace joyfully. The second man asked for a larger house so the King gave him access to one of his many castles. He hurriedly left, eager to try out his new home for size. The third man asked for a cat so the King gave him a cat.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Marilyn Manson was walking to church.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

2 Black men walk into the bar.. Guess what? There still black.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

how long does it take for a black woman to shit? a couple of minutes.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What do a plum and an elephant have in common? They're both gray, except for the plum

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What do you call a German who roasts Jews for a living? A comedian.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

what happened to the man who got stuck in a car after a crash? the ambulance failed to arrive and he died a slow, trajic death.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why was the boy adopted........ because hes grandad

thumb_up thumb_down -40

A man that says YOU SUCK MY DICK YEAH!finds a woman that says YOU SUCK MY BOOB YEAH!They get married,The woman is actually a gay man!

thumb_up thumb_down -8

WNBA

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops