What did the little boy do when he dropped his ice cream? Acted very mature and requested another one from his mother

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What is funnier than an uncontrolled explosions? Most things, because explosions damage property, and cause deaths.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

why does breanna love pie? BECAUSE ITS JIMMYS LAST NAME

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What did the dad do immediately do after his child died? Cleaned off the knife.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What is Bigfoots favorite food? Biscuits and Gravy.

thumb_up thumb_down +34

Why did the chicken cross the road? He was suicidal.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

"Knock knock." "Who's there?" "Dracula." "Dracula who?" He pulls his cape up to his face and says, "May the force be with you,"

thumb_up thumb_down -1

So my girlfriend says I'm a pedophile. What does she know she's nine.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What in the world is that thing in her butt!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +13

A priest, a rabbi and a shaman walk into a bar. Except there is no rabbi and there is no shaman and the bar is actually my 8th birthday party priest is molesting me. And the priest is my dad. My dad molested me. A lot...

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What did the man say to his brother? Nothing, because he just died in a tragic car crash.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

One time I masturbated by myself

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Mindfuck: They call you a patient where medics are because they do not want you to become impatient. The Coronel is the Kernel of the army (coronel sounds a lot like coronel no?) Sergeant = Sir gent. as in Sir gentle(man) Ok, so if you experience insanity one day, does that make you insane forever? In that case I was born and will die hungry and thirsty. Sigmund Freud= Sickman fraud. General: The guy you should generally listen to if you are in the army. 3.14 ratebay = PIRATE BAY! Why is Satan the antichrist, humans killed him :P Satan only "tempted his thirsty brother with water at the desert" Jesus showed real power by saying "NO WATER WHEN I AM THIRSTY IS BAD FROM MY BROTHER!"

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Roses are white, tulips are white, wait whos been masturbating in my garden!

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Two cowboys are in a kitchen. The first one says, "I feel at Home on the range!" To which the second replies, "Is that because of your extensive culinary background?" The first cowboy breaks down in tears because he has never pursued his real dream.

thumb_up thumb_down +55

A homeless guy walked up to me and said "Any change?", to which I replied, "Nope, your still homeless". We laughed and laughed. The he stabbed me.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Q: What do you give a woman with everything? Nothing. You own nothing to give.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Why did the tree catch on fire? A phinix hit it!

thumb_up thumb_down +21

YOLO.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What's funny about 9/11? Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What's green and has wheels? The Holocaust. I lied about the green and the wheels.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

Why was the school field trip cancelled? The Holocaust.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Whats the differense between a pile of dead babies and a Farrari I actually have a Farrari in my garage.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

so the guy @ the asian restaurant ask the waiter why his beverage tastes funny and the asian waiter says "It's likely that you are used to classic coke and they changed the formula"

thumb_up thumb_down +39

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops