Last night I lay in bed looking up at the stars in the sky and I thought to myself, where the heck is the ceiling.

How did little Sally break her Nintendo DS? Her abusive father repeatedly abused her and punished her until she was thrown into a stone wall. As she went into the wall she crushed by another wall and broke the DS.

. pussy . I don't get it ? .of course you don't

Why couldn't the Egyptian pharaoh solve the Rubik's Cube? He didn't know how.

What did the penis say to the other penis? What? Penis motherbucker

Whats bigger than a tuba? the universe.

What's worse than a piece of food stuck between your teeth? I don't know, what? A cruise ship stuck between your teeth.

I used play skyrim...but then I realsied I had a lot of exams so I had to stop

whats worse than the holocaust? nothing

Me and my pet lion just took a trip to his homeland of africa. It is also worthwhile to note I'm a chronic liar.

What's the difference between a trampoline and a dead baby? I take my cleats off when I jump on the trampoline

A guy walks into a restaurant.... He ordered his meal , got desert and left a nice tip based off a percentage of his final bill.

a black guy, a white guy, and an asian guy walked into a bar. It was an interracial bar, and served men and women of all nationalities.

An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a pub. They order drinks, then leave without speaking to each other. It was pure coincidence they walked into the bar at the same time. They had no connections to each other, them being from three different countries.

A Jew ran into a wall with a boner. He broke his nose first.

How many average men does it take to screw in a light bulb? One.

You're so stupid, you had to take part in special classes in school, and despite this specific attention to your educational development, you've made no major progress.

What did the goat say to the dolphin dogs don't lay eggs

SIMPLE EQUATION: John has 32 chocolate bars. He eats 28. What does he have now? Diabetes. John has diabetes.

What Happends When Sawdust Gets in your mouth You poop logs

What is your favorite joke? I like bar jokes. Okay knock knock Who's there? A bartender A bartender who? A bartender walks into a bar but before he went through the door, he decided to knock on the door because this lame joke is so random.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Being ripped apart by an angry orangatang because orangatangs have the strength of ten men.

The saying "When Pigs Fly" Can easily be canceled. Just tie a rocket and wings to it and let it go.

i want to eat a horse out jaffa cake

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...