How did the kid drop his ice cream cone? Ans. He got hit by a bus

why was the chinese man so good at math it was his favorite subject

What did the cat say to the other cat? Woof.

Your Mother is so kind that when I see her I say hello and ask her how she has been

What's blue, wriggles around, and sits in a corner? A dying baby in a plastic bag. What's green, doesn't wriggle around, and sits in a corner? A Christmas tree. The current homeowners were never made aware of the atrocity committed by the previous occupants.

A guy walks into a bar and orders 4 shots. The bartender promptly pulls out a gun and shoots him 4 times.

We are not even in the same country, and my eye becomes infected two times a minute or something so I wont be going anywhere. I mean, if you are some guy trying to be a girl in order to screw with me, let me first of all thank you for our exchange of ideas and concepts, and then say that if you are a guy, that likes other guys, then... Well, lets just say that if you are a man, that I don`t speak with men in general, takes away time I can spend with the ladies.

What's under the first mate? The second mate.

Roses are red Violets are blue You're a whore

Why was the black person assassinated behind a drug dealers house? He was purposely shot in the leg and bled out before he could make it to help.

"hey you know that graveyard down the street." "yeah." "people are dying to get in there."

A man walks into a bar, the other man ducks.

what did the crippled boy get for christmas? cancer.

Steven hawking walks into a bar. a.w j.p

Women's rights

25

Women

What's worse than five babies in one trash can? One baby in five trash cans.

Boys have swag, real men have class

A deaf, mute clown wearing nothing but a dead cat, a rainbow wig, and his own feces breaks into a couples home on April fools day. Then he murders them both because he is an escaped patient from an asylum for the criminally insane.

What's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a Ferrari? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

What did the blind man say to his best friend? All i see is darkness and i want to end my life

Is Yered a dumbass? YA

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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