a penguin biked to a bakery he walked in and asked for buns the baker said how many 12 or 13 the penguin said it don't matter I brought my bike

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What do you call a black man on a horse? A BLACK MAN A ON A HORSE.

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Why did the chicken croos the road? He was battling severe depression at the time. His alcoholism was tearing his family apart, he was declining in job performance and his boss threatened to fire him several times. I guess at that point he just decided to end it all. It was horribly tragic, policemen knocking on the door of his wife's chicken roost and informing her of the bad news. As soon as she heard, she rushed to the scene, only to see his mangled body spread across the street, intestines falling out. They held a closed casket funeral. Formal, all black. It was raining by the time the casket was brought to the cemetery to be buried. She hasn't stopped crying since. His children ask her, where's dad, but all she can do is weep. Suicide is bad, kids

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goats are like mushrooms, if you shoot a duck, im scared of toasters

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Why didn't the scientist discover a cure for apathy? He simply lost interest in it.

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Two nuns are in a bathtub, one nun turns to the other and says "where's the soap". The other nun replies "it does, doesn't it".

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When do you call 911? When you need help with do something that you either can't do alone or can't control

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People with Alzheimers will not remember this joke

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A homeless man walks into a house He is invited to a lovely lunch and then beaten to death

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The big male boar went out the forest, saw a group of women and start to swank.

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i used to take arrows to the knee,til i took one to the balls.

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If you have ten apples, and I take away three, then you will only have seven apples left, because ten minus three is seven. On the other hand, if I have a hundred apples, and you take away ninety-six, then I will call the police on you because that is stealing and it is not allowed. I will also remove you from my friends list on Facebook because stealing isn't nice.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Ted. Come in.

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Yo mama is so stupid that her IQ is relatively lower than the average.

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Why wouldn't joey pay attention in class? Because he was being raped by a grizzly bear.

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whats worse then having sex with a blonde? having sex with a cactus

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Why did the boy not turn in his homework? Because his pet ate it.

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What would a gay, transgender, mexican man say to another? We could have butt sex.

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Why did Jimmy get off of the park bench? he wanted candy from the man in the white van

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Knock Knock Who's there? Bob Bob who? Your neighbor

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A pengiuin walked into a bar. Just kidding, it waddled at an increasingly fast rate.

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Sex education in Texas.

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One day, a mother was talking with her three daughters. "Mommy," the first one asked, "Why did you name me Daisy?" "Because when we took you home, a daisy petal fell on your head." "Mommy," the second one said, "Why did you name me Rose?" "Because when we took you home, a rose petal fell on your head." "MMMMBBBWWAAAAAAAAAGGGGGHHHHH!" the third daughter cried. She was born with severe cognitive damage and is incapable of coherent speech.

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What did the drunk man say to his wife? "I love you, Honey"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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