Why did the tomato blush? It didn't, tomatoes are naturally red by colour.

An underaged man walks into a bar. He orders a beer, but the bartender says we don't serve minors. The boy then rushes out if the bar for fear of being caught.

Cliterus

Why did the black men chase the chicken ? Because it wondered out of a barn.

Why did the train crash? Because the conductor was a cucumber.

whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? lts of stuff like murder, rape, slavery, poverty, mindcontrol, mass genocide, the holocaust, racism, plagarism, physichal assault, war, terrorism, massacres, onsloughts, necrophillia, the dead rising, zombies, jokes on antijokes.com, awkward situations, dieing, cancer, ADHD, other mental illnesses, paint, the grim reaper, shinigami, stereotyping foreigners, prejudicism, bullying, armed robbery, hacking, viruses, incest, feral animals, getting lost in the forest, arsonry, pyromania, passing out in a bar, meeting a serial killer, and finding 2 worms in your apple.

How many blodnes does it take to screw in a light bulb? Approximately 17. with the addition of 6 brunettes.

what did the Nazi do when his Jewish rabbit died? silly Nazi rabbits don't have religion

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust.

Why did the chicken cross the road? A: It didn't, some dude ran it over.

Why is limety snicket a kike pussy? cuz will ferrell shit in his asshole

I just witnessed a horrible accident today! It was like a silent movie, but with SOUND!!!!

knock knock who's there? pizza man ok

Knock Knock. Who's there? Guitar. Guitar who? Violin.

What will happen if your heart skips 10 beats? Nothing. You're dead.

neil likes pube toast

Three Blondes were walking when they come upon some tracks. The first blonde says they're deer tracks. The second blonde says they're elk tracks. The last blonde says they're moose tracks. While they are all arguing about what type of tracks they are, they get hit by a train.

knock knock? who's there? ivan ivan who? ivan. i want you to apologize for tooking their jobs the other day i said ivan who? i dont have a middle or last name

Your MUM has aids :D LOL

why did the chair brake? because a car smashed into it. where did it go? all the way to china. whats 3+4? why did the Chinese man get this wrong? Because a chair was in his head.

What did the fork say to the spoon? To get to the other side.

What's funnier than House? Family Guy.

Two blondes and a brunnett walk into a bar. Remarkably, there was nothing else notable about any of them.

A baby gets hit by a bus.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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