Last christmas, I gave you my heart, and the very next day, you're body rejected the transplant and you died.

The dog buried it's bone. The next day it unburied it, and chewed on it until it was wrecked.

why did the asian go to the bar?? i dont know you tell me.

What do you call a dead blonde in a closet? A rape victim.

What do you call a kid with no arms and an eye-patch? Names.

Alcoholic walks into a bar and then walks out because he promised his children and wife that he would straight out his life.

Excuses are like butt holes...they are round

Roses are red Violets are blue I have a short term memory Roses are red

Why was the black man in school detention? For sleeping in and showing up late accidently

Jimmy Saville

What do you call a man with a black head, a red body, white arms and yellow legs? To get to the other side.

Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

why did Sally fall off of the swing? She had no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there?

Whats blue and flies? A suffocating baby strapped to a fan.

What do you call a man with a spade on his head? Doug

What do you call a boy that was once a boy, but no longer is a boy? A Man

A blonde sits down in first class on a flight to Miami. That's because she had a ticket for the seat.

why is thus joke stupid? because it is! deal with it!

How long does it take a black woman to take a shit? Why in the world would you want to know something like that? But anyway, the answer is somewhere, on average, between 10 seconds and 15 minutes. It really varies and conditions like irritable bowel syndrome and constipation affect this range. Actually it takes about 9 months.

A man walks into a bar. The bar tender asks him "why the long face?" He replies "Because I'm a horse, you jackass".

What's 6+2? 16

What's orange and sounds like a parrot? A carrot.

What is a vampires favorite desert? Vampires aren't real.

why did the girl scream when she got her tooth pulled? Because it hurt her.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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