what's worse than stubbing your toe? a hospital fire.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it had Alzheimers and forgot that he lived on the other side of the street.

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ask me what my temperpedic bed is like. ''whats it like?'' i dont know ive never had one actully.

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What did the blanket say when it fell off the bed Nothing it is a sentient object and doesn't have the capability to talk

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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What do a van and a pencil have in common? You can write with both, except with the van.

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What killed the dinosaurs? THE ROCKET POWERED FIST!!!

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there was this kid who was perfectly well-adjusted, had most normal things a person needs and a generally good life. what did he get for Christmas. non-hodgkins lymphoma.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the gay's house. Knock knock. Who's there? The chicken.

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A depressed horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Why the long face?" The horse says, "Millions of years of natural selection." The horse then tries to drink away his sorrows, but the alcohol is only a temporary release from the pain he's feeling. He kills himself the next day.

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I know Mandarin, He's a good friend of mine

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Yo mama is so fat she could be a plus size model because she's big and hot.

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Two men are sitting in a bar. They finish their drinks and pay the bill before leaving.

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America. A land where if a girl sexual harrasses a guy would be a good thing.

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What did the businessman do to get a promotion? He traded oral sex for his male bosses kind heart...

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Why did the black man kill himself? Because he was black

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting your car repossessed.

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I'll take a Reuben, light sauce, and could you do Provolone instead of Swiss?

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What did the KKK member say to the african american man. Nothing, he just killed him.

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What do you get when you cross a computer with a whore? A:porn

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What did the vegetarian order for lunch? A dead baby.

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What do you call a man with a spade on his head? Doug

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ok so what is big yellow and can not swim well dont look for the answer deuce bag

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What did the doctor say to his patient? You have stage IV Ovarian Cancer.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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