Why was the girl crying at the dance? Someone shot her.

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What did the man with the knife say to the ostrich? Run or I'll stab you!

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If a tree falls in the forest and it does it make a sound? No, Trees can't talk

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Why did the man commit suicide? Because on top of his depression, his wife had been cheating on him and his kids all died in a horrible hand-gliding mishap.

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Did you hear about the big Polish tragedy? There was a power outage in Poland's busiest shopping mall, People were stuck on the escalators for 4 hours. A woman gave birth in the elevator and died.

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What is black and blue and red all over? Rihanna

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Why didn't the bear go snowboarding? It was hibernating

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y momma so fat that she's heavy

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what did God say when He saw a black man? Oops I urnt one.

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TIMMAH!

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A horse walks into a bar and the bartenders says, "why the long face?" The horse doesn't respond because horses do not comprehend English. He then becomes startled by his surroundings and bolts out of the bar, knocking over a few tables.

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Where do you find a dog with no legs? Right where you left it.

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What's orange and hurts when you get it in your eye? An orange knife.

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A man is having dinner with his family at a restaurant. While eating his food, the father tells the waiter,"This food is delicious! My complements to the Chef." When the waiter comes back to the kitchen he says "You are a very handsome man."

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What do Jerry Sandusky and Michael Jackson have in common? They both had sex with little boys.

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A ham sandwich walks into a bar, bartender says "We don't serve food here."

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(Man #1): Do you know how I know you're gay? (Man #2): How? (Man #1) When I kiss you, you kiss me back...

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A son went to ask his father about his thoughts on abortion. "Dad, what do you think about abortion?" "Ask your sister." "I don't have a.."

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Knock Knock Whos there? Jason Oh, ok come in.

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On the first day of Christmas my true love gave to me, AIDS

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What did the black kid get for his birthday? A bike, just what he asked for.

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What did the human say to the human? You are a human.

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Why do innocent boys have wet dreams? Cause Jesus sucks.

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1, 2, buckle my shoe. 3, 4, shut the door. 5, 6, I'm gonna to cut you in your sleep.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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