A man walks into a bar. He says "ow."

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What's worse then biting into a apple and finding a worm? I can't think of anything worse.

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Why are plants green? Plants are green due to the chloroplast organelles found in their cells. These membrane bound organelles are exclusive to plant cells and are used to convert sun light to usable chemical energy. This energy is stored in the form of ATP molecules, or adenosine triphosphate. When one of the three phosphate groups of an ATP molecule is removed, the molecule releases the energy put into this bond and becomes ADP, or adenosine diphosphate. Throughout this process, the organelle fulfills its sole function and at the same time gives plants their green color our eyes perceive today.

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Why can't Amy Winehouse sing? She's dead.

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how did the girl with a hook-hand do her hair? She didn't

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What did the Apple Tree say to the Oak Tree? Nothing.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "Why the long face?" The horse replies " My daughter just died of leukemia."

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How often do you remember a dream? Well what if I told you that this is a dream go ahead pinch your arm. You probably didn't feel pain. And just incase jump out a fifth story window. Come on do it. Now if you are still reading this you are either dreaming or didn't jump out the window. Shame on you!!!!!!

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What's brown and sticky? A lump of shit.

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Tip for Employers: Avoid hiring unlucky people by immediately tossing half the resumes into the bin.

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Why did the chicken contact Michael Jackson? To get to the other side.

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whats small and tickles? pubic lice

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What did the Black guy say to the Jew? Lets be equals

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Dad: Blind side was the black kid who played tight end. Me: Offensive line. Dad: Sorry, African American kid.

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Why couldn't John ride a bicycle? Because he is a fish.

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what is the difference between oral and anal? anal makes your day and anal makes your whole weak

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What do a cow girl and an orange have in common? They all are fruit, except for the cowgirl.

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Q. What is the worlds biggest lie A. I have read and agree to the terms of service ?

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What's the difference between a Jew and an apple? One of them is a fruit, and the other is not.

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Three blondes are stranded on an island. They all die from starvation.

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What do you do if you see a black man in your backyard with a bullet wound in his head? Take him to the hospital.

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Do the roar!

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What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the user is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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A chicken walks into a McDonald's and the cashier asked the chicken what he would like to order. A man waiting for his meal walked out realizing that the employees of this restaurant were not who he wanted making his food.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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