Why did the orange put on the sun block? Because it was afraid of turning into a TAN-gerine!

How can you tell two twin sisters apart? Look at one twin, then look at the other, and acknowledge that they are two different people.

Whats the difference between a black man and a mexican? The skin pigmentation and most likely the size of their penis

What did one cow say to the other? Moo.

why does the guy jack off to black on black porn? because he's black

Knock Knock. Whos there? Death

Two muffins are in an oven. How does that even work? Muffin pans come with either 6 or 12 muffin holders.

Q- Why was Dan mourning the death of his wife? A- He wasn't he was mourning the death of his daughter who was killed in the same car crash as her mother.

Why did Humpty Dumpty fall off the wall? The wall was unstable and not to be sat on.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It lost it's grip on the branch and was unable to break it's fall before reaching the ground.

Knock knock Whos there An axe murderer oh sweet come on in.... dinners on the stove and i am here all alone

What happened when a black man's phone went off? He answered it.

Why did the kid fall over? He was hit by a car

What direction do 5 gay guys walk? I am unable to answer that because they are all aspiring to work in different occupational fields.

Why was it raining lobsters? Because they ran out of men. Why did the basketball player miss the net? Because he was hit by a lobster

Do not believe the sentence below. Believe the sentence above.

What's the square root of 69? 8.306623862918075

What's red bubbly and spins around? A baby in a microwave

How do you make a nerd cry? Give him a 99% on a test.

Why isn't eating an Olympic sport? Because that wouldn't make any sense.

What's worse than celery stuck between your teeth? A cruise ship stuck between your teeth.

What happened when the Asian girl got a B on her report card? She committed suicide

Well that explains a lot, thank you.

Much to my surprise, the Hoover Dam was not built by beavers.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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