Why was Tommy late for school? He got raped by spiderman.

Neutron walks into a bar and orders a drink. It never receives it because it can't talk and is far too small to see.

A man walks into a bar. Later that night he comes home to an intervention and realizes he has a drinking has hurt him and his family.

Its over 9000 penises and they're all raping little children!!!!!

Two men walk into a bar, the third one ducks.

What's black and hangs from the trees in my backyard? Black berries!

Yo momma so fat, when she steps on the scales it reads 90kg

Why was a black person on the run, being trailed by police officers? They were all late to work; their work places were coincidentally situated near each other.

Knock knock. Who's there? Banana. Knock knock Who's there? Banana. Knock knock Who's there? You're in-laws. Bet you wish I said banana

Q: Why didn't the boy go to school? A: It was the weekend.

Your mama's so stupid... She scored below average on a recent IQ test.

What's worse then finding a worm in your apple? Finding two worms in your apple.

The queen having a shit

How many dead babies can you fit in a trunk? 37.

So, there was two successful business men at a social gathering when one leans in to the other to comment, "Hey, that women over there, she looks like your wife!" to which the other one replies, "That is my wife."

Why was the black guy running away with a sack full of money? He was rushing to local charity to donate the money. It was closing in 2 minutes.

Two blondes were driving down the road. The blonde driving looks at her friend in the passenger seat and asks her to see if her blinker is working. So the blonde looks out the window and says, ''Yes. No. Yes. No.''

Q: Why did the black guy cross the road? A: Hell, I don't know. He probably stole something.

Why did the baby die? Because he got shot in the head repeatedly.

Your mom is so fat shes having trouble getting into her own pants.

Roses are red Violets are blue I was diagnosed as criminally insane Wanna be my friend?

Why did the catfish cross the road? Catfish can't walk.

A ninja walks into a bar the bartender asks "what would you like?" The ninja says "i'll have two green eyes" the bartender says "we dont have green eyes this is america" so the ninja is so mad that he goes home and brutally beats his wife with a spatula.

Mooses

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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