Whats worse then failing ur English test? Getting hit by a train

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What did the starving kid say to the starving parent? Pineapple

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aa

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what does a baby sound like in a microwave. i don't know i was masturbating

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A blonde goes to school, and completes a difficult math problem.

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why did sally fall off the swings she had no arms knock knock whos there not sally

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A man walks into a doctor's office and says "Doctor, it hurts when I poke my leg like this!" The doctor replies "That because there's a knife in your hand."

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What do you call two spaniards talking in French. Bilingual.

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for christmas? Cancer.

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A man asks his doctor if you can die from drinking to much water. The doctor replies 'Yes you can'

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A black guy walks into a bar. When he saw the white bartender's bar he got offended. There were heads of hunted animals on the walls. He works for PETA.

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Your mom is so stupid she went back to collage and got her masters n buissnes.

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A man meets the girl of his dreams. Too bad the man will die in 3 days due to terminal cancer

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Why didn't the Asian student ask for a calculator? Because he was busy washing the dishes and thought a calculator would be completely inappropriate for the situation at hand.

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yo momma's so fat that when she walked into church she had a nice conversation with some people who encouraged her to start eating better.

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Why did the pineapple cry? It didn't, because it's a pineapple.

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What Sound does a baby make in a blender? I don't know I'm to busy masturbating to it

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GIRL: Honey, for a holiday we should go someplace nice BOY: How will that work, none of us speak Mexican...

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Q: Why did the Mexican mother leave her baby in the hot car during summer? A: Because she was irresponsible and forgetful.

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What's the difference between a dead baby and a tire iron? I've never forcibly expelled three tire irons from my vagina.

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*via text message* Me: Hey Trevor! You at home? Trevor: This is Trevor's mom. Trevor committed suicide today.. Me: OMG! Why?!? Trevor: Because when I gave him a glass of water, it had 3 ice cubes. Trevor doesn't like odd numbers.

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Have you ever seen Stevie Wonders house? I have it's actually really nice

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What do you get when you mix a crap with a fart and a slug? Urmom

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Knock knock. Who's there? The police. Dave then complied, opened the door and let the police search his house. He was then found innocent of drug related charges.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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