A sober Amy Winehouse

thumb_up thumb_down -3

"Ask me if I'm a lamp." "Are you a lamp?" "No."

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What did the three-leaf clover say to the four-leaf clover? "FREAK!"

thumb_up thumb_down -2

The biggest joke in anti-joke are these two MOST FAVED What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust. +17662 likes MOST HATED whats the difference between a jew and a pizza? the pizza doesn't scream when it goes in the oven -1714 dislikes GUESS WHAT : they are both jew jokes

thumb_up thumb_down +30

i lost the game

thumb_up thumb_down -5

A funny joke: Bob was in trouble. He forgot his wedding anniversary. His wife was really pissed. She told him "Tomorrow morning, I expect to find a gift in the driveway that goes from 0 to 200 in 6 seconds AND IT BETTER BE THERE !!" The next morning he got up early and left for work. When his wife woke up, she looked out the window and sure enough there was a box gift-wrapped in the middle of the driveway. Confused, the wife put on her robe and ran out to the driveway, brought the box back in the house. She opened it and found a brand new bathroom scale. Bob has been missing since Friday.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

What did Helen Keller name her dog? A. Spot

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Not sure, its just a really rare combination, people tell me stuff like "oh they are really bright brown" like hell they are, I mean sorry but the hell they are. I prefer it the way you say it, they are red, really really red, and you do not say it as if I had something to be ashamed off.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Why did Sally fall off the swing set? Because she had no arms or legs. Knock knock. Whose there? Not Sally.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

what do you call a Palestinian with a large blade at the throat of an Israeli? a barber

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Where did all the time go? In a recent study, 100% of all time, all systems go.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

what is the difference between a Jew and a pizza? -one is the chosen people of Isreal and one is a food that was founded in Italy

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What's the difference between a dead baby and a watermelon? One of them you crack open with a sledgehammer and feast upon, and the other is a dead baby.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

I love telling anti jokes rather than jokes because I was born with a rare case of ebola and suffer from alcoholicationism

thumb_up thumb_down +16

what did one lady say to another lady? we are both ladies

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why was the blonde fired from the M &M's factory? Her Masters degree in electrical engineering made her overqualified for the job she had.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

On the fifth day of Christmas my true love brought to me Nothing, because we only celebrate one day of Christmas

thumb_up thumb_down +38

What did the Africans get for dinner? Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why didn't the woman cross the road? She died from breast cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What's black, blue, and red all over? A baby after I kill it

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Who is Jim Wonderbread? A whorrible person

thumb_up thumb_down -39

Knock knock. ... Knock knock. ... Knock knock. ... The FedEx man leaves, realizing that no one was home, and continues on with his job.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Knock Knock Who's there? Father Dougal Mcguire

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Q: What do you call 5,000 dead lawyers at the bottom of the ocean? A: A tragedy worse than 9/11.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops