Q: What happens when you hit a man with a car? A: You speed away hoping no one saw, you spend the next month and a half agonizing over your crime as it consumes you because you think of the poor man's family, then you either go to prison or hang yourself from a fan all because you wanted road dome....

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What did the robot say to the centipede? Stop being a centipede. -It's funny because the robot doesn't have any arms.

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Aaaaakkkkkiiiiiinnnnfffffeeeeennnnnwwwwaaaa

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What's the difference between The Holocaust and baking pizza? Pizza doesn't scream in the oven.

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Haikus are easy. But sometimes they don't make sense. Refrigerator.

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What did the blonde do when she missed bus 40? She waited 30 minutes for it to come back around again.

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What do you call an blank test? an F

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whats black and white and black and white and black and white and black and white and black and white and black and white and black and white? a penguin rolling down the hill. what black and white and laughing? the penguin that pushed him.

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Q:Why did the man fall down the stair I don't know? A:Because he wasn't careful

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what is red, white, and spins around real fast? a baby in a washing machine

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what does matt daly like to do in his free time anal

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Two cannibals are eating a clown, one says to the other: "Maybe we should rethink our ways of life and realize why animals are on this planet"

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Why not?

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William and Kate do get off their ass and do something useful for once instead of hogging the cover of intouch magazine.

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What's a slang term for a really, really fat person? Overweight.

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ok, a family walks into a talant agency, the talent agent says "What can you do". The family breaks out into a sing and dance routine, and do nothing sexual in their routine.

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Your mom is so nce that when you got into college she taught you to be more independent so you could succeed later in life.

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Why'd the blonde jump out the window? To kill herself

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What do you call red eyes in the dark? A high black man

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*Phone rings* Hello? Hi, is your refrigerator running? No, it actually broke down yesterday. Are you the repair man? Yes, the repairs will cost $400

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Why did the kid have no arms? A clown came and chopped them off.

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PENIS

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What's worse than Bogans? Boat people.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Segregation

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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