What do you call two Muslims flying an airplane? Pilots

A black guy and a white guy jump out of a tree, who hits the ground first? They both hit at the same time while sustaining minor injuries.

What's black and white and red all over? A dead penguin

A seal walks into a club. Do you like my new shoes?

Why did Hitler shoot himself? Because he found out Chuck Norris was a Jew.

All work and no play makes Johnny successful in his field of interest.

This blind man read my mind the other day. I swear, it's like he has a 5th sense!

Q: why did the plain crash A: because the driver was a loaf of bread

Guess What! HI!

A boy walks into his friend's house for a party. While he waits for his friends to return from the bar he realizes there are many people waiting in different lines for various kinds of drinks. After his friends return he decides he does not want any of the carbonated drinks they had ordered, instead he chooses to wait in the fruit punch line. There is no punch line.

How did the prisoner escape from prison? He asked to leave.

If pro is the opposite of con, then what is the opposite of progress? Digress

What has tomato Sauce And came from italy? Pizza

A blonde, brunette, and a redhead walk into a bar. The redhead, growing tired of the constant ridicule directed at her from the other two, kills them. She pleads guilty to 3rd degree murder on two counts and is sentenced two life sentences in a maximum security prison in Cambodia.

Lady Gaga didn't have anything to wear to the playboy party.

why did the truck crash into a tree? cause staplers dont know how to drive

Wanna hear a joke? No? Oh

Why did the kid cry? He had a frog stapled to his face.

A rhinoceros walks into a bar. As it felt threatened by the presence of many humans, the rhino attacks and kills several people with the big horn on its nose.

you were so loud you woke helen keller up!!!!!!!

Roses are gray Vilots are gray im a dog

What do you call it when the Doctor goes back in time to meet himself? A pair o' Docs. What do you call it when Shaquille O'Neil goes back in time to meet himself? Shaquille O'Neil can't go back in time.

what did old retarded autistic ginger kid get for his birthday? i dont know thats why i asked

What's blue and can't read? The Pacific Ocean

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...