why did the little girl fall off the swing - she had no arms.

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Why was six afraid of seven? It wasn't. A number is a mathematical object used to count and measure.It is not a living thing and therefore does not possess thoughts and feelings.

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What did Batman say to Robin before he got in the car? "Get in the car Robin."

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i Have read and agreed to the terms of service

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How do you confuse a blonde? Tell her to jump over your car, then drive by in a truck

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Have you ever had Ethiopian food? No? Neither have they.

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whats the difference between kids and jewish people? kids come home from summer camp

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Me: Why are red onions actually purple..? Dad: I don't know Sister: *sarcastic* Well, Why is it rainy in London? Me: ....Because that's the weather pattern.

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what has 4 legs but can't walk? a paralyzed dog

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What do you call a hard working black man? A hard working black man.

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A. Wanna Hear a funny joke? B. Yes! A. The WNBA.

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man ur hairline is soooo far back the archaeologists couldn't find it

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KNOCK KNOCK who's there? hello is anybody there? hello?....... .....the number your trying to reach has been removed please hang up the door knob and put the squirrel back in the lawnmower were it belongs.

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what do you call afish and a cat? a catfish

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Your mom is so ugly that you should buy her a paper bag to cover her face because she is just so very unattractive that it burns mine and everyone else's eyes.

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roses are red turtles are random. cancer

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How many Jews died in the Holocaust? Not enough.

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A girlfriend scolds her boyfriend for "sitting on anti-joke all day." He then explains how it is impossible to sit on something that exists purely in digital form and instead noted it would be more correct to say sitting at a desk all day. She complied and saw the error of her ways.

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Q: What's black and white, and red all over ? A: A penguin in a blender.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It felt like it, no particular reason. Why did the hippo cross the road? Same reason as the chicken. Why did the Fred cross the road? He was with animal control, and a chicken and hippo had just been reported to cross this dangerous stretch of highway.

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what's longer than my shlong? .... nothing

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How do you get a slave to stop screaming from the rope he is hanging on? You stop messing around and you hang him already!

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Q: What do you give a woman with everything? Nothing. You own nothing to give.

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Q:why is walmart so big? A:Years ago a man named Sam Walton had a vision for one stop shopping and affordable low prices. And it goes without saying that being a one stop shop must mean you have a lot of inventory thus the size of Walmart is a lot larger to hold and support the increased mass of inventory .

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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