Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It lost it's grip on the branch and was unable to break it's fall before reaching the ground.

Knock knock Whos there An axe murderer oh sweet come on in.... dinners on the stove and i am here all alone

What happened when a black man's phone went off? He answered it.

Why did the kid fall over? He was hit by a car

What direction do 5 gay guys walk? I am unable to answer that because they are all aspiring to work in different occupational fields.

Why was it raining lobsters? Because they ran out of men. Why did the basketball player miss the net? Because he was hit by a lobster

Do not believe the sentence below. Believe the sentence above.

What's the square root of 69? 8.306623862918075

What's red bubbly and spins around? A baby in a microwave

How do you make a nerd cry? Give him a 99% on a test.

Why isn't eating an Olympic sport? Because that wouldn't make any sense.

What's worse than celery stuck between your teeth? A cruise ship stuck between your teeth.

What happened when the Asian girl got a B on her report card? She committed suicide

Well that explains a lot, thank you.

Much to my surprise, the Hoover Dam was not built by beavers.

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Spilling Dr. Pepper on your carpet

What happened when john pelted susie with a rock? she had a temporary concusion, needed eight stitches and John was grounded

relatable: school : 2+2=4 Homework: 2+4+2=8 Exam: oscer has 4 apple his train was 7 min early now caulate the mass of the sun

Why did the black man have to stand in the bus? All of the other seats were taken.

A: Want to hear a funny joke? B: Nah, I'm okay

Why did America nuke Japan? Because Japan bombed Pearl Harbor.

A man goes to the movies with his wife, two hours later they drive home and find their house just the way they left it.

A white man walks into a bar. Then he gets a beer.

How much wood can a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood? The Holocaust

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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