Dave: My wife just gave birth! The baby is doing good. John: You mean doing well?

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j

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A woman had a dream. She followed this dream and completed all the goals she had set in life and was excessively happy. Then she woke up and her original suspicions were confirmed...it was a dream.

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No it doesnt..

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What do you get when someone tells you an anti joke? An anti joke.

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What would George Washington say if he were alive? "Help! im stuck in a coffin!"

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What did Washington say to his men before they got into the boat? Men, get in the boat!

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You know what pansies remind me of? What? A flower

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How do you knock a clown off a swing? Hit it with an axe multiple times.

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Q: Why don't chicken breasts have nipples? A: because if you freeze them, they will pop the package.

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What color was the fence before it was painted green? Not green.

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cats are pussies

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Roses are red Violets are blue I hate rhyming Penis

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What's the same about eggnog and a computer? You can search the web. Except that's only true for one of them.

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What is a refrigerator and white all over? A refrigerator

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Q )Why did the black man shoot the white man? A )The black man had been walking home from his weekly gospel service at the local church when suddenly the criminal had stopped him in his tracks. In a desperate attempt to save himself he seized the gun from the white man and shot him in the leg in order to defend himself. He survived.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because if he stayed on the farm, he would have been condemned to a miserable life, subjected to deplorable living conditions and an eventual pain-filled death by the hand of a cruel and heartless farmer. Crossing that road was his only chance of salvation.

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What's the difference between roast soup and pea beef? Nothing because neither of them are physically possible; you can't roast soup and you can't pee beef

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Jumping out of an airplane is a once in a lifetime expeirence.

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Why did the Asian Cross the road? Because the crossing signal went green!

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Why did the tornado cross the road? Cuz it's a tornado. Don't question it. Run.

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What's funnier than 24? 25.

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A man walks into a bar. What's missing? The joke.

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knock! knock! who's there? mom mom who? your mom... your girlfriend just died in a car accident while carrying you baby...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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