Q: how many babies does it take to paint a house red? A: It Depends on how hard you throw them

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Your mama's so fat, that at her last annual checkup her attending physician informed her that it would be in her best interest to diet and exercise before her obesity manifested itself in a variety of chronic afflictions that would detract from her ability to lead a long life.

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A guy thought it could be funny to write a joke that is not and post it on a social network. And did it

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Q: What did the Miracle Whip say when the refrigerator door was opened? A: Nothing. Miracle Whip cannot speak.

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What was Hellen Kellers biggest mistake? Knock knock jokes

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Q: What's black and blue and is all over Timmy's mother? A: The bruises his father gave her when he came home drunk.

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If a tree falls in the forest and nobody is around, does anyone really care?

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Roses are red Violets are fine I'll be the 6 You be the 9

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why should not women able to vote? because their stupid and should not vote at all

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yo momma is soo stupid when anyone says anything she say i don't understand .

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I bet I can say the the whole Greek alphabet faster than any other person in the world. The whole Greek alphabet faster than any other person in the world.

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How many dead babies does it take to paint a wall? First of all, babies do not have the physical ability or the mental capacity to ever paint a wall, no matter how many of them there are. Second of all, they are dead which probably will not increase their chances of painting said wall.

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What's purple, smells like an eggplant, and looks like an eggplant? An eggplant.

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What did the African-American get for Christmas? Nothing. I did mention he was African-American, right?

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A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks what he'd like to drink. The man pulls out his gun, shoots the surprised bartender, and proceeds to execute all the patrons of the bar and finally commit suicide. A post-mortem identification of the man identifies him as a victim of childhood sexual abuse and a diagnosed schizophrenic. There is a nice funeral for all the victims and the media respectfully minimizes exposure of the event.

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A duck walks into a bar and the bartender asks, "What'll it be?" The duck says that he should get his doctor on the phone because his hullucinations are getting worse.

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what is the difference betweeb 69 and 77? 8

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How many jewish people can you fit in a Volkswagen? depending on the class of car but a mid range SUV can seat up to seven.

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if a dog won't bark, there's no way you can teach it to talk.

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Shortest Joke in the World? Well, just look down.

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what worse the 2 dead kids in a van 3 dead kids in a van

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Why did the man not go to church? He was an atheist.

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Everytime someone says Jamie on this website, he's referring to Dylan, cause he's to insecure to write jokes about anyone else. Please direct all jokes at Dylan Hodge, 14 years of age, living in Queensland, Australia, come to his house to watch the f a g man, suck his mothers p e n i s.

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your a towel.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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