How do you torture Helen Keller? Give her a cheese-grater and tell her it's a book.

why was the boy crying? ... because he had a frog stapled yo his face.

What do you get if your mailman drops your letter in black paint? Blackmail

A ninja walks into a bar the bartender asks "what would you like?" The ninja says "i'll have two green eyes" the bartender says "we dont have green eyes this is america" so the ninja is so mad that he goes home and brutally beats his wife with a spatula.

A horse walked into a bar. The bartender asked: "Why the long face?" The horse said: "My wife just died."

Your mother is so stupid because as a child, she was unable to keep up with what was being taught as she unfortunately had a learning disability.

What does AIDS smell like? AIDS has no smell. AIDS is a diease contracted though sexual contact with another being with the diease. It greatly increases the risk of infections and malignancy. Although AIDS has no smell, in the final stages large sores develope on the surface of the skin. This means you are going to die. Thus, HIV/AIDS has no smell.

A black man orders a pizza to be delivered to his house. He is delightfully pleased at the speed in which the pizza was delivered and decided he would order from that pizza shop again in the near future.

Q: What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in the water? A: Shark bait.

What do you say to an over weight Jewish mother? "Work on those crunches" He was her coach.

Why did the black man win the race Because he was faster than all the other contestants

epic win?

What is funnier than an uncontrolled explosions? Most things, because explosions damage property, and cause deaths.

Get a life besides thumbing down statements telling you advice.........

What do you get when you cross a hamster with a zebra? A genetic abomination that you should put out of it's misery.

Q. How do you make an oil lamp turn off? A. Break it.

What did the man with cancer say to the Holocaust survivor? "I have cancer."

What's the difference between a murcielago and a dead baby ? I don't have a dead baby in my garage. 8-)

What do a blueberry and a raspberry have in common? They are both commonly used in parfaits.

If frogs weren't alive, there wouldn't be any frogs left on earth.

What do you call a room full of jewish women with yeast infections? The waiting room of a gynecologists office, potentially in some sort of Jewish district

What do you call a fat man in a tiny pipe? Stuck.

What's green and has wheels? Grass, I lied about the wheels.

What do you call a man with no legs? Disabled.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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