How many Catholics does it take to change a light bulb? None. They use candles

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Knock Knock Who's there? The IRS. You've been convicted of tax evasion.

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Why wasn't the man hungry? Because he just ate a thousand almonds.

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What is grosser than somebody eating their own booger? Someone else eating that persons booger

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If life gives you lemonade.

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Have you ever seen that really famous blind man's house? Neither has he.

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What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Depending on whether you have permission to eat it, either stolen property, or a nice snack shared between friends.

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My friend on xbox told me about this cool clan. I went to join but I didn't like to wear the white robes

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What is white and can't climb trees? Toothpaste.

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I like colin but not as much as apple

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why did mary fall off the swing? Cause she had no arms. Why didnt she get back up? Cause she had no friends. Knock knock whos there Definately not mary !

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Guns don't kill people; high speed bullets and sharp projectiles launched at high speeds usually inflict painful and possibly fatal wounds that may kill someone. That someone loves and is loved by others.

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roses are red and violets are blue and i was going to write something that rimes but that is not funny here.

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What happens when an old lady bumps into a black man in the middle of the night? He politely offers her help getting home and she accepts.

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Awesome! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us <

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Caolan and Eamon

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A man walked into a bar. He stayed for a bit and had a good time.

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Type 2 diabetics

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What do u call a man with no arms and no legs and is laying in front of a door? Matt

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Whats worse than the holocaust? Finding your babies head in a microwave

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A man walks into a Library.... And asks for a book.

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Why did the woman leave the kitchen? She had finished her breakfast and had to get to her job as a firefighter.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I like saying the colors of flowers... how about you.

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What's the difference between a car and 10 dead babies? I don't have 10 dead babies in my garage.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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