What's a slang term for a really, really fat person? Overweight.

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a fat old hobo named da'shovant'e ate a bucket of fried chicken then killed a little girl named poopface McFergusen

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How do you stop a clown from smiling? Hit it with an axe!

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A boy walks into his friend's house for a party. While he waits for his friends to return from the bar he realizes there are many people waiting in different lines for various kinds of drinks. After his friends return he decides he does not want any of the carbonated drinks they had ordered, instead he chooses to wait in the fruit punch line. There is no punch line.

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What's worse than a male chauvinist pig? A woman that won't do what she's told.

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What did the black man say when he met a white man in the street? "Hello, how are you?"

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What do u call something that's sticky and in a stick form? A glue stick :)

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How many light bulbs does it take to screw in a dyslexic child.? DAMN

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Why did the chicken cross the road ? To achieve his goal on the other side of the road. Being a chicken he is not aware of the arm a fast traveling motor vehicle can bring to him.

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I used to be an adventurer like you, but then I was raped by a giant scorpion...

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What did the Jewish boy get for Christmas? Nothing, Jews celebrate Hanukkah.

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Q. whats worse then eating a slice of cheese? A. Finding out your mom has a penis

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You wanna know what's out of this world? The moon.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Well, most likely, the chicken escaped from a near by ranch or farm. Upon escaping, he may have simply wandered in the direction of the road, and hence crossed it. Or, with chickens having great curiosity, may have been attracted to something on the other side of the road and felt the urge to explore. Depending on the demographics of the area in which road was in, the chicken had different chances of being hit by an automobile. That's why.

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knock. knock. whos there? BOWLING SHOE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Why did the man fall off the swing? he got hit in the back of the head with a shovel.

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Knock Knock Whos there? Knock knock? Whos there? Knock knock. WHOS IS THERE?!?!? Knock Knock is, my name is Knock Knock.

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What's the difference between Paris Hilton and a cow? Cows are ruminants, meaning that they have a digestive system that allows use of otherwise indigestible foods by regurgitating and rechewing them as "cud". Paris Hilton, on the other hand, is a human being. Therefore, her stomach digests the bolus (masticated food) only after it has exited the oesophagus into the body of the organ, where it is digested into chyme and then passed through the pyloric sphincter into the duodenum.

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What does a baby sound like when put in the microwave? I don't know, I was masturbating.

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If life throws you cars, you are probably on LSD.

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your mommas so fat she jumped for joy and got stuck

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Roses are red Violets are blue Last but not least, Bananas are yellow.

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Roses are red Violets are blue There's nothing else I want to say

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A blind man walked into a bar. Quite literally.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops