Q:A man has 100 chocolate bars he eats 93 of them. What has he got now? A:Diabetes

thumb_up thumb_down +25

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The holocaust. What's worse than the holocaust? Nothing, you heartless asshole.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What's worse than 10 dead babies in a dumpster? One dead baby in 10 dumpsters.

thumb_up thumb_down +76

What does the black guy look for when he goes shopping? Some soap for his dead cat in the living room.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What did the snake say to the mouse? Nothing. The snake ate the mouse.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Knock, knock. Who's there? Not the World Trade Center.

thumb_up thumb_down

Two flatfishes swam in a bathtub.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Whats green and tasty? Snot

thumb_up thumb_down -66

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it lacks the cognitive reasoning ability necessary to determine that walking into oncoming traffic will surely result in death

thumb_up thumb_down +19

A priest and a bunch of boys are in a room. They are having choir practice.

thumb_up thumb_down +68

No just stuff on the internet when I get bored, like on facebook and stuff, why a nurse? Whats wrong? Is he ill?

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Q: How do you fit 100 mexicans in a van? A: Its theoretically impossible.

thumb_up thumb_down +50

Where's my tractor?

thumb_up thumb_down +13

whats 2+2? 1

thumb_up thumb_down -451

this going to be my new text thingy! i dont have a phone! WATS UP!

thumb_up thumb_down -18

what did the duck say to the chicken .nothing

thumb_up thumb_down +42

What did the robot say to the centipede? Stop being a centipede.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

my great great grandpa ryan the rattlesnake had a cat named dog-

thumb_up thumb_down +2

what do you call obama a dumbass

thumb_up thumb_down +2

wanna hear a sad joke? you! by mad james

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What would Michael Jackson do if he were on the Moon? Nothing he's dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +1,027

A boy spelled the word "banana" wrong on a spelling test... Points were deducted.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Do you know the difference between a dinosaur and a slice of bread? No. You're pretty stupid then.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Okay on a scale Casey Anthony to Jerry Pandusky how much do you love your kids?

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops