Why did the Muslim suicide bomber commit suicide? He was nervous and didn't think he could hijack a plane.

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Two chinese friends are chatting, and one says ????????? His friend says ??????? After that, the first one says ???????????, and you keep reading this like if you understood chinese.

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What do you get when you cross an owl and a bungie cord? My ass.

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Why couldn't the man read? Because he was illiterate

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A police man, doctor and stage actor walk into a bar. They're identifying the corpse of the stage actor's brother.

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why did Max cry??? chicken

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would you rather harry styles my dick have harry styles suck my dick or both of you style on my harry dick?

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a. why? b. because

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What did the blonde get for Christmas? A Brain

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So a man walking down a nature trail came across an injured fox laying on the ground in pain, it looked like it was attacked recently. There wasn't much the man could do at the time, so he gently picked up the fox and rushed the fox to his house. The man arrives moments later at his house with the fox. There were a lot of options the man could choose, but he went with a simple recipe. The man grabbed a knife and gutted the fox, removing all unnecessary organs. He then skinned the fox of it's fur. He sliced the head off, cut the legs to a stub, and stuffed it. He gave it a nice seasoning and placed it in the oven at about 350F for 6 hours. When the fox was perfectly cooked, it was taken out of the oven and left to sit for about 5 minutes to cool. He cut a chunk of meat from the dish and sat down to eat. "What a fine meal" the man said.

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What did the ghost say when it stubbed its toe? Ow

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Roses are red Violets are blue I am disabled, so please help me poo.

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Sooo, when exactly did you become a man? Is this subject boring you?

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Why was King Triton mad at Ariel? Her grades were under the C.

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why did the little girl throw a clock out of the window? because she wanted to see time fly

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Q: How many 3 go into the number 102,351? A: Yes.

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Why did they bury the fireman on the east side of the green grassy hill, to the left of the old well, underneath the huge apple tree? Because he was dead.

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Q: Why did the singer stop singing? A: Someone threw a car at her face.

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Why wasn't the black woman allowed on the bus? It was rush hour and the bus was full.

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How do you stop the mailman from performing his daily routes? You fill his house with blood thirsty bobcats

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Why did the koala fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second koala fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first koala. Why did the third koala fall out of the tree? He thought it was a game.

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Knock Knock whose there your parents your parents who your parents just got malled by a hobo with an axe.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. You honstly thought i would cry over you? Well guess what player, You just got played too!

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Two giant paint bubbles!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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