Q. What is worse than a worm in your apple? A. Hitler

So I saw a man trying to push a plane. I asked why. He told me to mind my own business and go get ebola. And that's why I left for Africa.

Why do black people like bananas? Because bananas have potassium which therefore gives them bigger muscles, which is why they excel at every sport we white people suck at.

Did you hear about that man who ate 17 cheeseburgers?! I didn't.

Jessica walks into a bar jokes jessica cant walk

"I can sell this watch for $500 dollars on the black market!" Well, you could sell your liver for $500 dollars on the black market too.

What's black and blue and red all over Sex

I don't get it

Tim tebow is the anti christ

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: I didn't get to ask. He got hit by a car.

What do you call a blackjack man driving a car? An average citizen.

Hey, have you heard the one about the elf and the watermelon? Neither have I.

Why did the boy fall off the purple cliff? Because someone cut of his legs and arms and threw him off.

how do you get a nun pregnant? have unprotected SEX with her, resulting in expulsion from her convent

How do you know when a blonde has been using your computer? If you're lucky some of his or hair will have fallen out and be left on the keyboard as evidence.

What happened to the boy who stalked the pretty girl? His father raped him and he died in a house fire induced by his overwhelmingly sick love for the taliban

roses are red, violets are blue, dandelions are yellow, tulips are pink, sunflowers are black and yellow, my dick is 13 inches long.

What do the Holocaust and baseball have in common? They are sports, except the Holocaust.

A blindman walks into a bar... then a chair, then a pole

What do call something that looks exactly like a turtle but is not a turtle? A picture of a turtle

Knock knock Who's there? 7. And if that's you in there, 6, you better start praying.

What did the boy say to his father? I don't know. With the seemingly infinite number of topics that two people could discuss and the fact that both the father and son are fictional, it would be unreasonable and border edge mentally unstable for me to assume that you would know what they may or may not be talking about.

Whats worse than a paper cut? AIDS.

What did Death say to Life? "Look, I respect that you waited till after I broke up with Sandy to ask her out, but it's still a little akward for me, so although there are no hard feelings, it's probably better if we keep our distance from each other for awhile."

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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