What has four wheels and smells like an asshole? YOU.

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Why did the girl scream? Someone shot her mom

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stinky boner

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how do you confuse a blonde? tap her on both shoulders

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Why couldn't Lucy get her driver's license? Because she has Cerebral Palsy!

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What did the robber take from the store? The managers dick

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Roses are red. Violets are violet. Violet is a color already.

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Kid 1: Hey, guess what? Kid 2: Your MOM! HAHA! Kid 1:... My mother died two months ago from brain cancer after being shot in the head while fighting for our country in Iraq... Kid 2:.... um.. Your mom...?

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How do you cure AIDS? You can't.

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Whats red and hurts if it hits you in the face? a brick

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What's big, black, juicy, large, and succulent? A gourmet meatball.

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Three a man is trapped on a desert island and a genie offers to grant him one wish. The man accepts the existence of the genie and then wishes for unlimited wishes for the rest of his life. The man takes over the world.

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Q: What is wrong on many different levels? A: Rape on an elevator.

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HI MY NAME IS DOUG

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You are so ugly that when u were born, your mom was unable to breast-feed you because she would have to look at your face to do so.

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Why did the first Monkey fall out of the tree? He was dead. Why did the second Monkey fall out of the tree? He was tied to the first Monkey. Why did the third Monkey fall out of the tree? He thought it was a game.

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Why wouldn't the girl clean her room? She was paralyzed.

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man was playing with his little toddler. the man put his thumb through his fingers and said "got your nose" the baby laughed. the cops then burst down his door and arrested him for robbery of personal items. they werent laughing.

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There once were 2 cowboys who were lost on a dusty trail. Later on they found their way out and are now doing very successful

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How do you kill a zombie? You don't. Zombies aren't real.

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What's the connection between Obama and Michael Jackson? They both want to be a girl.

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How many Jews can you fit inside a car? Legally somewhere between 2 and 9 depending on seat belt availability and passenger space.

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Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she's a woman.

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Why shouldn't you drink and drive? Because you might hit a bump and spill your drink.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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