Why are there cookie's in the jar? 'Cause I put cookies in the jar

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how do you get a girl of a swing? puch her off! how do you get her friend of a swing? throw a refridgerator at her!

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What did the man say ti the other man? Hi

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What do an apple and a banana have in common? They are both not cookies

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

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Two guys went to a bar, and the bartender said, hey you guys want to hear a funny joke? "Sure" said the guys. The bartender started telling: Anyway, there was this time two guys at a bar, and the bartender said, hey you guys want to hear a funny joke? "Sure said the guys" At this point, the bartender started telling: Anyway, there was this time two guys at a bar, and the bartender said, hey you guys want to hear a funny joke? "Sure said the guys" At this point, the bartender started telling: Anyway, there was this time two guys at a bar, and the bartender said, hey you guys want to hear a funny joke? "Sure said the guys" At this point, the bartender started telling: Anyway, there was this time two guys at a bar, and the bartender said, hey you guys want to hear a funny joke? (when you are done start reading from the top again, and don't stop ever)

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What is brown and sticky? Syrup.

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What's that in the road.... a-head?

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What happens when you cut down a tree? It falls down.

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96

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A man walks into a clothing store, he calls his wife, buys a shirt, and leaves.

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What is the difference between a Ferrari and 1,000 dead babies? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

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I couldn't afford a hair cut... So i contracted cancer.

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Q:How do you sleep with Paris Hilton? A:You don't. she got herpes.

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A man and his son are in a store, the man says to his son, "That candy bar has your name on it." The son replies, "I wish that you didn't name me Butterfingers." The dad answers, "I wish that you were never born."

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1500 Jews were ordered to walk a straight path whilst in the midst of a blizzard. How close did they ever get to the end? What end? They marched until every last bit of their rotten Jew flesh was driven from their weak bodies. --Amon Goeth

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A duct walks into a bar. The writer meant to write duck and then proceed to make a clever joke but instead a typo was made and a very unlikely occurence was writtern about considering air passages are not capable of walking and would most likely already be in the ceiling of the bar as too bring fresh air into the bar is important.

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Q: What has 2 eyes and 2 halves of pigs' snout? A: Two pigs peeking around a corner.

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What did the man do when the woman broke up with him? He changed his facebook status to single.

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an irishman gets on facebook...he has 7 friend request

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You cant like my stuff ive known you for like 1 day. just kidding you can like whatever you want, actually ive know you for 5 years

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What do you call a white woman that had sex with a black guy? A rape victim.

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Yo momma so poor, she can't afford to live in a two story Cheerio box

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What did the Irish nun say on her deathbed? "I now realize that smoking was an unhealthy habit and I regret that I made the choice to do so." Then she died

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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