roses are red. violets are violet...

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A boy was crying. He had been abused and beaten by his parents, and thrown in his room. He was devastated, and wanted to kill himself. He tossed and turned in bed, and moaned himself to sleep. When he awoke, he felt a chill up his spine, noticing that all of his blankets had been torn off of his bed, leaving only him and his mattress. He open the window, and jumped out of his three story building. Luckily, his bedroom was on the first floor. He ran away, and found a rich family that loved him so much until a week later, a murderer came and killed everyone, including him.

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A German and an American walk into a bar. George W. Bush got hurt, but Albert Einstein didn't.

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An elephant walks into a bar. It was so big that it broke a lot of things.

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A woman walking alone through a poor area of town. She is approached by a man who proceeds to mug her, rape her, and murder her.

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Knock Knock Who's there? You have AIDS.

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Why DIDN'T the skeleton cross the road? ..He didn't have any private parts

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What is better then fisting? Fisting with a metal studded glove

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The chicks at the bar last night were do hot. The girls weren't half bad either

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There's a fine line between hyphenated words

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What is the difference between Jews and boy scouts? Jews are a religious group. Boy scouts are a group of boys who enjoy camping and other outdoor activities.

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I once met with Mahatma Gandhi and he said to me "Child, why do I walk this earth?.. What is the meaning of my living?.. Why am I alive?" and I bowed in respect of his wisdom and said "I don't know. Why do you?" and he said "I don't I'm dead."

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FORTY SECONDS!!!!!!

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there was a black guy and white guy, they were walking down a street to da bus stop, the bus comes by and says where yall goin and they say 21st avenue street; so they walk away and the black guy says(in a black voice): "wait buses dont talk!"

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What can bankrupt people buy? Free stuff.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, You know what? SCREW YOU!

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How many seals does it take to unscrew a lightbulb? Depends on how high the ceiling is.

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When you have read this, you've already read it.

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Why did hellen keller's dog kill itself? You would to if your name was, AIIEEEEIUUUUHGH!

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Two nineteenth century men walk into a bar. Their wives didn't complain, because if they did they'd get hit. hard.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Roses can also be white And violets can also be purple

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An American, a French man, and Jew were all in an airplane about to skydive. Their skydiving instructor comes out and says, "I'm sorry, there seems to've been a mistake and we only have two parachutes." The company refunds them, and they, while reasonably disappointed, agree to reschedule the lesson.

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Knock Knock Who's there? The police. Your under arrest for drug trafficking and possession of illegal firearms. You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say...

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Q: What did the redneck say when he ran out of beer? A: I need more beer.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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