How do you kill a blonde? lightsabre to the throat should do it

why was the water bottle empty? because bob drank it. stupid bob...

Why did the blonde flunk out of school? Because she was a fucking idiot.

Why was little timmy's arm crooked His mom tried to pull his arm off.

Two tomatoes where crossing the road, when one of them barely avoided being run over. The other said, come on tomato!

What's the difference between a box of dead babies and a Lamborghini? I don't have a Lamborghini in my garage

I've got a dig bick. You that read wrong. You also read the second sentence wrong.

Why did the man look up into the sky? carrot cake

What is the difference between a urologist and a can of chili? One is hot and spicy, and the other analyzes urine.

What is the biggest lie in the world? I have read and agree to the Terms of Service.

The Labour Party.

A bus crashes and everybody dies.

Whats orange at the bottom of the swimming pool? A baby without floaties.

What do you call a dozen Muslims waiting to board a train? Passengers...you racist.

"What time is it?" "Time to buy a watch." The homeless man inquiring about the time proceeded to cry.

Why was Joe lying on the ground? Because he got shot.

Thats what she said

Roses are red, Violets are red, OH SHIT MY GARDENS ON FIRE

Why did the boy give the girl flowers? Because her parents died in a car crash and he felt bad.

Why did the rabbit cross the road? I don't know, I was asking you.

why does Tom Sawyer like apples? He likes their flavor

Emergency call: - Please help, my little son swallowed a condom! 5 minutes later - It is ok, I found another one.

Why didn't the chicken cross the road? because it got shot before it could get there.

I can't hear music. I am a sentence.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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