How do you make a twelve year old girl cry twice? Rub your bloody dick on her teddy bear.

What would you like to drink? A Pepsi. Is Coca-Cola okay? No.

How many Jews does it take to screw in a light bulb? One jew to screw in the light bulb.

How do you get a nun pregnant? You have sex with her.

So these IRS agents were negotiating a deal.....

Wanna hear a joke about my penis? Oh wait I shouldn't tell you, it's too long

What did batman say to robin befor they got in the car? Robin, get in the car.

Why did the little boy rush downstairs to the living room on Christmas morning? because he heard his mother screaming rape.

God and Allah are having a metaphysical picnic, God says to his fellow deity: "Why do you think so many humans have been killed in our names?" Allah muses upon this for a moment and replies: "Because they think we exist."

Roses are red, Violets are black, Why is your chest, as flat as your back

Knock Knock. Who's there? grape. Grape who? Purple grape.

Hey, have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? No. Well, neither has he.

-The proceeding statement is true. -The preceeding statement is false.

A black guy, a white guy, and an Asian guy walk into a library. They were getting help from the Asian guy on their math homework.

What do you call a shop dedicated to selling rap music, watermelons, grape soda and fried chicken? A poor business model

Why was the Mexican man in the rich man's garden? Because he enjoys flowers.

Why did the chicken cross the road? - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - I lied, it was a goat.

"What would you do if i gave you a million dollars?" "I would scream and jump up and down? Are you really gonna give me a million dollars?" "No i just wanted to see what you would have said, that's all"

lets have sex, ok, but itll have to be anal, cuz im a guy xoxox danni

Girls Lacrosse.

Give me time to think of a joke hm..............hm.................hm....................hm....................mmm....................hm?..........................m m.....................mmmmm..............hm...................hm.....................hm......................... ah!i don't want to think of a joke

What did george washington say before he and his troops crossed the delaware river? We are going to cross the delaware river. R...

What happens when a truck full of mexicans and a truck full of aisians collide? They all die.

What's (333x4)-198+(456x100,432)-10+5? Bet ya said i don't know! I don't either.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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