Why are Asians yellow? Because that is their natural skin color

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Your mom is so stupid, she stole free samples.

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"This is the best of all possible anti-jokes," said Pangloss.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? For a joke.

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Why did the car drink Slurpies? I don't know. Why? Doorknob. Carl was unsure on what his friend, Frank meant when he told his joke, but then again who IS sure? Frank is the only one who truly knows what happened that day on August 13th 2010 when his mother came over for a surprise visit to her son's house just as Frank was heading out the door about to get in his truck and buy groceries, unaware that his mother was standing outside and bending over to ring the door bell not to expect Frank opening the door with his quick and violent actions thus hitting his mother in the face as the door swung open. Frank hadn't known his mother was at his house nor even remembered him but there she was, past out bleeding to death on his front lawn. It was Frank's fault that day, when his mother past away and reason why Frank hides his anger through his jokes. If only he hadn't opened that door he tells himself every night. Now he's cursed himself with his odd humour of using doorknobs as punchlines to hide his grief of his loss. And with that, Carl replies; Ummm.... I don't get it.

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What do you call an old man in his underwear with a bag of pepper on his back while licking pebbles off the sidewalk? Senile.

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There is a cat with a collar animal control takes of the coller and and says who cares it's not Our fault there cat is an outdoor cat the girl who lost her cat was crying all year long spending all her money wishing for her cat back and wishing that there was no such thing as animal control That girl was me and I'm against animal control

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Hey, is that your corvette? No, I thought it was yours.

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How did the boys sunglasses fall off his face? He was drop kicked.

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Why do Mexicans stink? Because they're Mexican.

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What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Nothing, he's Jewish.

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What did the deaf girl get for Christmas? Nothing, she was Jewish

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Why do black guys have ashy elbows? Because of 9/11

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I'm ginger no more needs to be said...

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A blonde, brunette and redhead are walking in the forest when they come across a set of tracks. The brunette says, "Those are dear tracks." The redhead says, "Those are elk tracks." The blonde says, "Those are moose tracks." They are then hit by bus.

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What do you do when a burglar breaks into your house and tries to kill and rape you and you family? Nothing, he as an AK-47 and shoots you all dead and then has sex with your corpses.

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A man walks into a vagina. The man, expecting a holiday inn, is very confused, and later gets mauled by five bears, who mistook his scent for a fish.

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Why was the phone wearing glasses? It lost its contacts!

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Why? Because racecar.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He was dead. Why did the sloth fall out of the tree? He was stapled to the monkey.

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Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken.

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What starts with P and ends with O-R-N Porn.

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Knock knock ? Who's there ? Ipe Ipe who ? You sick !

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In Pokemon, why are bug types super effective against dark types? Because Ebola affected a lot in Africa.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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