A dog walks into a bar, the dog is assisting his blind owner

Why is mario red? His mother beat him as a child.

How do you know when a guy wants to have sex with you? When he rapes you

Q:how do you make a rockstar cry? A: hit him with a breifcase

Why did the baby cross the road? It was nailed to the chicken

How can you tell you're in a childrens' ambulance from the inside? From the clown patterned body bags.

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, I chucked a shit and flushed the toilet.

Why did the Mexican sneak across the US border? There aren't many good jobs for him in Mexico, and with the cost of living in his small village, he will be able to provide for his entire family of seven on just minimum wage in California. He will miss his family terribly while he is away from them, but he believes it is worth it in the end. Once he saves enough, he will pay the coyotes to smuggle the rest of his family over so they can be together again. Hopefully none of them will die on the journey.

Why did Jimmy burn the American flag? He was Canadian.

Why did the man jump off the cliff? Because he suffered from chronic depression as a result of frequent drug abuse.

How did the fat man avoid getting dehydrated? Fat men don't excersise and therefore cannot become dehydrated.

My mother's star sign was Cancer. Ironic how she died really. She was attacked by a giant crab.

What do a pizza man and a gynecologist have in common? They are both hardworking members of the community!

what does the homeless man do when he gets home? nothing, he's homeless

whats the diffrence 2 gay people and 1 gay person? A 1 person diffrence

Whats worse than a bunch of teen-agers throwing kitrens at my house I didn't save them because I thought they were jehovahs witness's

Why was the baby crying? He saw a nigga

What's the difference between a convertible and a dead baby? One's in my garage, and one's a car.

How many ears does Captain Kirk have? Two.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he wanted to

did you see stevie wonder's new guitar no neither did he

Mr Mac reminds me that no matter how hard you try you will always lose your hair

Knock Knock. Who's there? Dementia.

Why did th chicken cross the road? To get to your house. Knock knock! Who's there? The chicken

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...