What is the meaning of life? Bill Gates: Windows Donald Trum: Money Some poor kid:luck and rich parents.

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Why did the boy take the girls backpack? he has this many hands

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No I do not think that, that would be a wasted thought.

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Q: What do you call a pair of dead babies lying on the ground? A: Slippers

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What starts with P and ends with "oop" POOP

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roses are cows violets are oranges im mental are you too

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Whats worse than forgetting some thing at the supermarket? your nuts being nail gunned to the wall.

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I love you You love me Barney gave me HIVS It started with a hug and ended on the floor IVE BEEN RAPED BY A DINOSAUR!

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Knock, knock. Who's there? Doctor. Doctor Who? It's Doctor Green. I've got some bad news about your test results. Can I come in?

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A man walks into a bar and the the llama next store sprouted wings and flew Then a potato says hi to a iPod but unfortunatly the iPod can't talk. Meanwhile hello kitty and ducks wage a nuclear war and the rise of ostriches Started. The a giant cucumber started falling of mt. Everest and killed many Flying platipuses were saved. Then aliens started invading and the world ended.

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Why didn't the skeleton go to the dance ? "because he had nobody to go with" No because it was dead.

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I met a fat girl and fucked her on an elevator. . . It was wrong on so many levels.

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Bugsys back back back again with a brand new track cumming on megs back back back with a new boxing cap cap cap, stealing millions from banks having a wank coz hes a lanky cockney mong

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Why is Timmy afraid of x-rays? The last time Timmy had an x-ray, the radiation was too much for him, giving him terminal cancer, which also explains why he will die in the next 24 hours.

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Me: "Dad! Can you make me a sandwich?" Dad: "Poof! You are now a sandwich."

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Knock Knock Who's there? Jehovah's Witness

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a guy walks into a bar and finds an empty chair near the jukebox. He orders a drink and some peanuts and has a really good time listening to the music and drinking his beer.

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What happened at the 21 year old's birthday? She tried alcohol for the first time. She partied. She danced, She's dead. Open case.

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Jameson: hey peter peter parker: what Jameson: do you know what my favorite kind of beans are Peter: no Jameson: van de camps

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Yo' mamas so fat that your friend said a yo mama so fat joke to you. You were certainly not amused.

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Why did Susie fall off her swing? She had no arms Nock nock Who's there? Not Susie.

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Why did the police arrest the black man? He'd committed a crime, and was punished accordingly.

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What's the difference between a pizza and a jew? A pizza doesn't scream when you put it in the oven

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Why does it take 7 years for Harry Potter to kill Voldemort? Voldemort is a very powerful wizard and Harry Potter is just learning magic at the beginning so he is not prepared to fight him.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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