A: Don't hit those black people!!!!! B: Those are trash cans.

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Why did the boy die of Cancer? Because I took some radioactive chemicals and hen I feel like it I beat him with it.

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How do you drown a blonde. Put a Scratch N Sniff at the bottom of a pool and tell her to sniff it.

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whats worse then finding a worm in your apple? finding two worms in your apple

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What do you call a cat that plays football? Weird.

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Why didn't the teacher ask where Billy's assignment was? Because Billy died last week. -B

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What do you call a dog with no legs? Doesn't matter what you call it because it isn't coming.

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Stephen Hawking walks into a bar. Apparently he can walk now.

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A mouse sniffed a peice of cheese. It was on a mouse trap and then it died in the trap.

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What did the penis say to the vagina? Nothing, genitalia can't speak.

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where do you get virgin wool from? ugly sheep.

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what is the difference between having sex and having sex on my period ..... i have something to drink when i have sex on my period

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Your momma's so ugly that she was worried that she would never marry anyone.

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What's worse than a black guy? Two black guys....and a dead white man.

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Who did the dinosuar, that's pretty fricken awesome!

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There is a young boy called Clive, and his dad asks him what he wants for his birthday: "I would like one yellow golf ball please dad" he said. Of course, his father was quite surprised by his son's request, but nevertheless, he got him a yellow golf ball for his birthday. A few years later, clive does amazingly well at school and gets all As in his final exams. Filled with pride and love for his son, his father says to him: "I can't begin to tell you how proud i am of you, Clive. In fact, you can have a preasant! What do you want?" Clive thinks for a moment. "i would like one hundred yellow golf balls please!" His father was a bit annoyed at his strange request, but neverrtheless, gave Clive his yellow golf balls. A few years later, Clive wins the gold medal at the olymics for the 100m sprint. His father is very proud: "Son, i am so happy about the way you've turned out. You make me so proud. Is there anything you want me to do for you?" "can i have 1000 yellow golf balls please" Now his father got annoyed, he thought Clive was taking the piss. Eventually though, he calmed down and got clove the golf balls. Unfortunatley, Clive gets diagnosed with a deadly disease. His father is heartbroken. And as clive is lying on the hospital bed, his father moves close and speaks to him. "Son" he said, tears welling up in his eyes, "I just want to ask you one thing." "Ok," Clive said, as he too started to get emotional. "Why on earth did you want all those golf balls?" Clive looked deep into his father's eyes, as he took his last breath said: "I wanted them because- ack -splutter- ack" And he died.

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what does a slim jim taste like? there is no answer because everyone has a different amount of taste buds

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? No? Neither has Stevie Wonder

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If all ziggles are zaggles and all zaggles are zumbles, then why is your mother a whore?

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Q; Why did the gas station attendant scream when 3 black men walked into his store? A: It was his surprise birthday party.

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so your paddling up stream in a cement canoe, one wheel falls off. how many pancakes does it take to shingle a dog house? 46 cause bears dont like eggs.

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What type of movies do pirates watch? None they are on a boat!

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How do rocket scientists exchange greetings? They say "hi"

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jack be nimble jack be quick jack is a parapeligic.....there's no need for more

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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