96

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Knock Knock. (No answer) Knocker: " I guess the resident of this home isn't home at this hour."

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Friends are like penguins because when you throw a polar bear at them they die

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Hello

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96 right now there mad at each other but pretty soon it will look like this 69

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hi will

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What did the father say to his son? I'm leaving and I'm not actually your father.

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Q: How do you make an onion cry? A: You can't, it's an onion.

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What do you call a man whos had his arms ripped off in front of you? An ambulance, because with an injury such as this, you can die anywhere between 10 and 45 minutes

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dont you love porch monkeys? no.

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So FDR walks into a bar.

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What is better than winning a gold medal at the special olympics? Not being retarded

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burn baby burn your nanas burning

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What's the difference between Mel Gibson and a pineapple? Well at a molecular level, not much because both are made up of atoms.

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What did Newton say to Einstein? Nothing, Newton was dead before Einstein's birth.

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What happened to the man who had the most loving parents and family when he was born, had an amazing childhood which he shared with so many good friends, was loved everywhere, helped the poor, started a fundraiser for starving kids in africa, got a college education, helped a complete stranger get off his drug addiction, married a beautiful woman, bought a nice house and had 3 children who he loved dearly and spent time with as much as he possibly could, tucked them in every night and enjoyed every second of his life as if it was his last? He died.

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What's worse than the unwarrented death of six milliion Jews? The death of six million and one Jews

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Did you hear about Helen Keller's dog? Neither did she.

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Roses are gray Violets are gray ROFL I'm a dog

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How do you make a little girl cry twice? You finish on her teddy bear.

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What did the president say after his wife and kids left Him? Im Obama self now

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Q: What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in the mountains? A: Bear food.

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How do you find the richest person in Mexico? Google it!

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A black man walks into a bar with a lovely parrot on his shoulder. The bartender asks "hey where did you get that Africa says the parrot...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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