OH MY LUMPIN GOD!

A man walked into a bar, he then fell to the ground screaming in pain.

A Mayor accidently killed one of the citizens of his town through dangerous driving. He could not be charged with murder, as it was an accident, but there was an uproar, and he was humiliated beyond question and forced out of office straight away. Even his family rejected him, owing to the fact that the unfortunate citizen he struck was his son's girlfriend.

What's worse than finding a repeated joke on Anti-Joke? Your family being massacred in front of your eyes.

Why did spock look in the toilet he was concerned with his poop

My gifts to my gf included: A diamond ring, a sports car, a house in malibu, a new credit card, a private jet, but most importantly, a Refrigerator.

Asian NASCAR.

What did the Turkey say on Thanksgiving? Gobble gobble.

Roses are red violets are blue we're stuck together like superglue roses go brown violets go darker cut the crap and the stupid laughter...I just went through a breakup

Why did the chicken cross the road? Although this is a highly improbable scenario, one would assume that, being a chicken, it did not have much of an intuitive idea as to what to do while it was stray for whatever reason in an urbanized area. Considering chickens do not harbor nearly as much of a mental capacity as it would require to even comprehend the concept of a "road" and is impervious to the idea of oncoming traffic and such, the fact that it happened to be crossing the road was in fact not even recognized by the chicken. For this reasons I deem this question unanswerable.

Did you know, every time you close your eyes, a ghost appears. Once you open your eyes it disappears. PROVE I'M WRONG!?

Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? She was a woman

why was the bunny black? because it was born this way baby

What do you say to a fat guy working out congrat him and tell him he's doing a great job and keep up the work

What do you call a black priest who's name is John? Father John

Why did the boy commit suicide? Because he was bullied at school and felt it was the right decision.

Whats better than 32 dead babies stapled to 1 tree? - 1 dead baby stapled to 32 trees

Whats the difference between a horse and glue? Nothing

Why did the chicken cross the border? Because he was an immigrant and was afraid of the police.

Why could the grandma chew? She couldn't she had no teeth

Irish sobriety

What does D.N.A. stand for? Deoxyribonucleic Acid

Arnold Schwarzenegger has a big one. Lady Gaga has a small one. Madonna doesn't have one. What is it? A last name.

Knock knock: Who's there? Guy in the doghouse. Guy in the doghouse who? WILL YOU LET ME OUT OF HERE?!?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...