What do you call a woman who has huge breasts? Sarah, for instance.

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What do you call a black man on the moon? An astronaut

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whats the differnce between a corvette and a pile of dead babies??? i dont have a corvette in my garage.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says 'Why the long face?' The horse says 'My alcoholism is destroying my family.'

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Rabid squirrels attacked Blake's face as winged pickles perched on Phoebe's hair.

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you're mommas so fat that her doctor says she is morbitly obese and may die of a heart failure later in life

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know chickens are absent minded creatures that can aimlessly walk around.

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Q: Why did the girl fell from the swing? A: Because she had no arms.

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It's okay, I got the yogurt.

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Woman + Kitchen = sandwich

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A dog, a cat, and a a fish were having a conversation while their owners were away. Ashton Kutcher is a murderer.

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If a tree falls in the forrest and a women hears it does it make a sound? Why is there a tree in the kitchen.

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How do you acquire a bomb? Go to the bomb store.

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Q:What do you call a wizard who flies? A: A flying wizard.

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A: Knock Knock B: Come in A: Come in Who B: Your Mum...

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Why was the gay guy sad?

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What did the little girl say to her mother? Nothing, the previous day the little girl was kidnapped and rapped by two 40 year old men and was eventually decapitated...she will never speak to her mother again.

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Why did the batmobile lose a wheel? The joker was raping robin too hard

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What do you get six year old Hitler for his birthday? An Easy Bake Oven

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Did you know that there is no A is "sodimizing"?

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A bar walks into a man... The man begins screaming uncontrollably as the corner of the building is inserted into his anus. Brick by brick, the bar forces its way inside the man's ass, as blood begins dripping down his legs. The man knows damn well it is impossible for such a large building to be contained inside him, but he grits his teeth and forces his ass open wider. His ribs break, his lungs collapse, and his now lifeless body is stretched into the shape of the bar. The bar is almost entirely consumed before the man's skin gives way to the bulging pressure...with an explosion of blood & organs, the shredded remains of the man are slung-shot around the lot where the bar formerly stood. The bar, now soaked in a mixture of blood & organ fluid, reflects upon the failure of its experiment. For the next attempt, a man of far greater fortitude must be used, so that his body does not burst so easily. Only then will it achieve its dream of becoming the first bar to walk into a man.

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What's worse than anti-jokes? The holocaust.

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Person 1: Your Ugly Person 2: Your mom's ugly

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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