What did the man say to the other man? yummmmm

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Goats are like mushrooms. If you shoot a duck, I'm scared of toasters

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Why didn't the chicken cross the road? ... Well, do you know or not?

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What do you call an Arab man flying a plane? A pilot.

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Q. What do you call a dog thats deaf? A. A horribly abused domesticated animal that needs a kinder owner.

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Why can't you hear a pterodactyl going to the bathroom? Because the p is silent!

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Q: What's one thing that 5 out of 6 people always agree on? A: Gang Rape

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Your mother is so fat that she is considered morbidly obese. In fact, she should seriously consider a weight loss diet to reduce her risk of heart disease and diabetes.

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What did the homeless man get for his birthday? AIDS

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What do you do when a blond ask you a question? Answer politely and thank her for her wonderful question.

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What's worse than losing your phone? 9/11

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What did the depressed man get for his birthday? a rope

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If I were in a room with you, Hitler, Stalin, and Palin, and I had a gun with 3 bullets in it, I would drop that gun and run as fast as I could from that room. Sorry, I hate you!

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? 6 and 7 are non-living objects and cannot show fear or anger.

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Knock knock Who's There Sally Sally who? Sally who .got hit with a fridge and fell off a tree because I have no arms. Sorry, I do not know you.

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I'm at a payphone. Though I'm out of change so I'm unable to call my girlfriend and break up with her.

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- Ask me if I'm a firetruck. - Are you a firetruck? - No.

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Women's rights

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Roses are red, violets are blue, why am i even talking to you?

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Roses are black Violets are black I'm blind

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Faith, Family, Friends, those are three words.

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What is black, white and red all over? A nun in a blender

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Why did the women leave the kitchen? She didn't, women belong in the kitchen.

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what do u call a gay guy? Marlin Stein and Bryan Carboni

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops