Q:What do you call a cow with no legs? A:A hamburger.

What did the man say to the other man? yummmmm

A dwarf walks under a bar.

A man walks into a bar. It resulted in a concussion and 17 stitches.

Are you Jamaican? Because your dreadlocked hair is an iconic symbol of one who would be from the country of Jamaica.

Women's rights

This is not a good joke.

A horse walks into a bar, it is then frightened and bucks a man in the chest. Animal control and an ambulance are promptly called. The horse is then taken to a stable, while the man is taken to the hospital where he later made a full recovery.

Q: what did the poor, blind, deaf, orphan girl get for Christmas? A: cancer.

Q: What did the boy with no arms or lags get for christmas? A: He dosent now he cant open them.

Why did they chicken cross the road? It didn't. A van ran it over when it was halfway across.

Bob goes swimming in the ocean. Due to the fact that his father sexually abused him as a child, and never taught him how to swim, he drowns.

Why did the boy have sex with his grandpa? His grandpa is a nice guy and it was his birthday.

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what has 4 legs three eyes and a horn? a:yo mama

What do you get if you mix a baby with a blender? A prison sentence.

Simba was moving slow,so I told him to MUFASA!!!

What's the difference between a black guy and a picnic table? Many things, really. Beginning with simple structural features such as the number of legs, of which there happen to be four on a generic picnic table, and two on a human being. One might observe that a typical african american male is between 5'8" and 6'2" in total length, whereas a picnic table, being made to support 6-8 people will generally be slightly longer. A black guy will generally be pictured standing upright. A picnic table is usually horizontally laid out upon a flat surface. The former is living or dead, the latter is usually nonliving, processed wood or metal. The former may move about from day to day of its own accord, the latter is completely stationary, and indeed very difficult to relocate, etc.

A red-head, a brunette, and a blonde are playing hide-and-seek. Hide-and-seek is a fun game, so they probably had a great time.

what did the catholic priest say to the little boy? -probably something about god or jesus because they are in church

A priest and a police officer are sitting at a bar. They both have considerable drinking problems because problems unrelated to their respective occupations. The bartender's name is Mike.

How you know that you are flying with a "no frills" airline? There are no meals or films provided, no orange juice to drink during ascent and descent and no mid-flight shop service.

I have a little dog. She likes being tossed high into the air. I need a new little dog as the last one was caught by a gust carrying here over the sound-dividing highway wall and dropped into traffic.

Q : What is the similarity between me and my friend? A : We both are crazy

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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