Billy and Jeff wanted to go on an adventure so they planned a safari in Africa. Everything was going as planned until they were in a sticky situation: whether to cross a narrow bridge above the crocodiles or not. Billy tells Jeff "Hey whats the worst thing that can happen?" Jeff was diagnosed with cancer and died the next morning.

What's black and white and red all over? A cow being processed

Yo mamma is so pretty, she is frequently complimented on her good looks.

Have you seen Stevie wonders new house? No Neither has he.

I got shot, you laughed

An American, a Mexican, and a Chinese person are in an airplane. The three of them ponder throwing someone out for a racist reason, but decide to fly to the destination.

What did the cast of sex and the city get for Christmas Nothing Sarah Jessica Parker is Jewish

Why did the Mexican cross the border? He was hoping to achieve greater economic prosperity and well-being for his family. penis.

What did the jewish boy get for Christmas? Nothing.

Why has 8 wheels and costs more than a Lamborghini? Two Lamborghinis.

How do you sleep? With a knife I just saved a lot of money by switching to Geico......with a knife I'm going to the restroom, with a knife. How do you do a back flip with no hands? With a knife. What is 2 plus 2? The answer is 4, with a knife. Would like you like to go see a movie with me...with a knife? Today, I'm going to show you how bake a strawberry chocolate cake...with knife. I'm sorry, you have the wrong number...with a knife. Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side....with a knife. A man walks to a bar and orders a shot of vodka....with a knife. Omg, I just saw Miley Cyrus at the mall today....with a knife. In Soviet Russia, blah blah blah, with a knife. How many blondes does it take to screw a lightbulb? 1, with a knife. I'll be back in time for dinner, I'm going to the gym and work on my abs....with a knife.

Two muffins are sitting in an oven.

What did muscleman say to his dad? You know who else is my dad? MY MOM!

roses are red violets are blue im in class

how do you wake lady gaga up? you hit her in the face with a frying pan

Q: Why did the little boy cry? please answer this question in the form of a 2 page essay and back up your answer from personal experiences, your readings or any other outside sources.

Why did a blind man buy a violin. To learn how to play a violin.

Cat ate a battery, did volts.

Why did Hellen Keller's dog run away? It didn't. She didn't have a dog.

What do you call a black man climbing a mountain. A mountain climber.

Do you know whats funny to say to someone unless they're black. Your ma's in jail.

What's Red and Invisible? No Tomatos

a muslim walks into a bar, he then remembers his religion forbids the drinking of alcohol and walks back out

A man had a terminal illness. He died a few months after he was diagnosed.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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