I told a priest that I would never believe in anything greater than myself. He said I had the God complex, that I was grandios. I stared him in the eye and asked, "how highly do you think of me? Thank you" and left.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What did Han Solo say to Chewy before they got in the Millennium Falcon? Chewy, get in the ship.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

why dont black people go on cruises? there not falling for that one again

thumb_up thumb_down +11

what do mr. potato head and micheal jackson have in common? their noses come off pretty easily

thumb_up thumb_down -16

I wonder if barrack Obama will rename the whitehouse...to the blue house because it is his favorite color

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What worse that punching a baby? Stabing one.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

What did the little girl do with her puppy? She killed it.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Whats worse than a pile of dead babies? A live on at the bottom.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Why did the black man have no toes? Because during his climb of Everest, he got frostbite and they had to be amputated.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Why did the chicken cross the road? To pick up the carcass of its road-killed younger brother and weep.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

One man walks on a bridge, another man sees him but doesn't really care about him.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

FOLLOW ME @airvvv

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Whats black, white, and read all over? Micheal Jackson reading a book while painting himself red.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

How do you kill a blue elephant? With a blue elephant gun. How do you kill a red elephant? Spray paint it blue then shoot it with a blue elephant gun

thumb_up thumb_down -41

A man walks in to a bar, what does he say? Ouch.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Roses are red,violets are blue, im epileptic sdblkselhvefbed

thumb_up thumb_down +18

A horse walks into a bar. the bartender asks, "Why the long face?" The horse does not reply because it is a horse. The horse walks out of the bar kicking over some chairs and scaring some people because he is a horse and horses do not belong in public atmospheres.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Q. Why did the girl fall of the bridge A. Her dad pushed her

thumb_up thumb_down +19

What did the victim say to the rapist? If you're gonna rape me, at least let me go get you a condom

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Why did the chicken cross the road? To escape the overwhelming feeling of self doubt created by an abusive drug addicted father which has left him seeking life threatening situations that should never befall a simple chicken.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Roses are red, Violets are blue. Guess what, I have cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down

Sarah Palin is President

thumb_up thumb_down -38

what does lady gaga and a vacuum have in common? nothing. lady gaga is a human and the other is a house hold item.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What's funnier than ten dead babies nailed to one tree? Nothing, infant mortality is not a laughing matter.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops