A woman walks into a bar and orders a pint of ale. "Are you a Lesbian?", joked the barman. "Yes", replied the woman.

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What is striped black and white? A prisoner in jail arrested for the murder of a 7 year old child.

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Knock knock Who's there? Banana Banana who? Orange Orange who? Banana Banana who? I have AIDS

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Q: What did the gun say to the person. A: Bang.

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How do you make the perfect anti-joke? Don't tell it.

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2 biggest lies I have read and agree to the Terms of Service - View Terms of Service and That baby dont look like me

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What's the difference between you and a bucket full of shit? The bucket...

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Pitbull is Mr. Worldwide because his music sucks everywhere in the world

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How do you scare a blonde? Paint yourself yellow and call yourself big bird.

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What happened to the boy when he did nothing? The game.

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was a woman.

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How do you tell a bunch of Chinese people apart? Go up to each one and ask them their first and last names. The chances of any of them being the same is quite slim, giving each person their own identity.

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car? This isn't a car

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Roses are grey, Violets are grey. I'm colour blind, It's a very depressing situation.

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a man walked into a bar, sat down and had a drink with his friends.

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Here's a riddle... A cowboy rides into town on saturday, stays for three days, and leaves on saturday... How does he do it? Well, you see he is a time bending magician who usually lives on a farm on Mars with his family of magicians. He is not really a cowboy but dresses like one to be like everyone else. He is heavily affected by peer pressure and has done a lot of dumb things just to impress his partners. His partners are big bullies and they have trouble being nice to Jimmy (The time-bending, space-living, cowboy-impersonating martian). His partners names are Bob and George. Oh right... I'm trailing off... Well, you see he is a time bending magician who usually lives on a farm on Mars with his family of magicians. He is not really a cowboy but dresses like one to be like everyone else. He is heavily affected by peer pressure and has done a lot of dumb things just to impress his partners. His partners are big bullies and they have trouble being nice to Jimmy (The time-bending, space-living, cowboy-impersonating martian). His partners names are Bob and George. Oh right... I'm trailing off... Well, you see he is a time bending magician who usually lives on a farm on Mars with his family of magicians. He is not really a cowboy but dresses like one to be like everyone else. He is heavily affected by peer pressure and has done a lot of dumb things just to impress his partners. His partners are big bullies and they have trouble being nice to Jimmy (The time-bending, space-living, cowboy-impersonating martian). His partners names are Bob and George. Oh right... I'm trailing off... OH... I'M DONE NOW...

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Why was the man running? He needed to get somewhere fast.

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Doctor Doctor, I feel like a pair of curtains! Really? Well that's the least of your problems. Your test came up HIV positive.

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I Love You Jordan! P.S. from someone you know

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What did billy get after sex? Herpes

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I am in love with pizza. It was a friday night and i was hanging around with my so called friends 'banana-rama' 'pearman' and 'peaches' (keep in mind these are all fruit). I ordered a pizza from Poker Pizza and it came an hour later i brung it to my kitchen and i opened the box. It was lovely. I eat it, i soon realized that I had eat my one true love and decided to order another pizza.

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Where did Susie go during the bombing? Everyone. - Blake Woodman

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knock! knock! who's there? mom mom who? your mom... your girlfriend just died in a car accident while carrying you baby...

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How do you know what time it is in the dark? Turn on the light and look at the clock.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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