How many dead babies can fit in the trunk of my car? Seven.

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How often does the lesbian vampire group meet up? Never. Lesbians don't exist.

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What's worse than your console not switching on? A mutilated body.

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Why is 6 afraid of 7? 7 is a terrorist.

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How many dead babies does it take to paint a wall? First of all, babies do not have the physical ability or the mental capacity to ever paint a wall, no matter how many of them there are. Second of all, they are dead which probably will not increase their chances of painting said wall.

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What's worse then getting a broken bone? A large marsupial charging at you with vicious speed

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What did the librarian say to the rude man who was talking very loudly? The librarian said "shhh keep it down."

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What did the fish say when he swam into a wall? ouch.

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What do you call a man with a limp? A limping man.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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Whats red and you can't see it? No Tomatoes

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Why did the pedophile get arrested? He was driving way over the speed limit.

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Which is the smallest? A. Jupiter B. Whale C. Cow D. Bracelet Answer: D

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How do you save Africa. Put a rash of bacon in and envelope.

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What is Justin Bieber + One less lonely girl. A BABY

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Knock knock Whos there You spelt who's incorrectly You spelt whos incorrectly who ...................

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What stinks of shit and has money. Smelly Mc Dee I lied about the money.

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A cat walks into a bar and says.......Meow

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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My dad said that if I post anymore jokes on this website, the will hit my head against the keyboaaskdnaji;nsd;asdnasd;

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What do you get when you combine High Fructose corn syrup. sunflower oil, carbohydrates, and water. How the heck should I know!

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Why did the chicken run across the road? It was 9/11

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Roses are black Violets are black Everything is black. I am blind.

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Roses are red Cranberries are tart It sure stinks when you fart

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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