When life gives you Pure Filtered Water, Sweeteners (High Fructose Corn Syrup, Sugar), Lemon Juice from Concentrate, Less Than 0.5% of Each: Natural Flavors, Citric Acid (Provides Tartness), Modified Cornstarch, Glycerol Ester of Wood Rosin, Sodium Hexametaphosphate and Sodium Benzoate and Potassium Sorbate and Edta (to Protect Taste), Red 40 Make Lemonade.

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Listen Nero, I understand now that this is your real name, actually I know where you live thanks to the good old phonebook... ...My order is fully based on respecting and treating all living beings equally and focusing on actually putting old notions such as Gods and superstition away in order to strengthen humankind`s belief in itself and others. As for Nerometal, well, that was one of my... Lesser followers, I assure you they have been taken care off, they will not be bothering you ever again. What would it take for you to forgive our transgressions? Money? Power? Ask and you shall receive, as far as your identity goes, you shall have it back and I shall use another site in the future.

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the best time to wear a striped sweater is all the time

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How did the guy with aids die? He died of aids

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okay, there was a donkey and a parrot walking at the park. When it was raining the donkey says to parrot hey why is it so hot. Then a person riding bikes come to the parrot and she told her to sit down. Nobody saying hello but she can dance reallly nicely.

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Why did the little girl fail her test? Because she had mental retardation.

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How do you get 100 Africans in a phone box? Throw a can of beans in there.

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What do you call a black man with a knife and red liquid on his hands? A chef who accidently spilled strawberry jam on himself.

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Whats better than a panda? A panda with an ice cream cone.

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Are you kidding? If you can slow down time when stressed, then that means that your perception of time is, well... Oh relative, but still wow! What about now though? Can you do it? And for curiosity`s sake, what if you jumped off a roof? Would the stress make it all really slow?

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because numbers, like people, are afraid of all things bigger than themselves

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What do you call it when a woman doesn't want the child she is currently impregnated with? Abortion: a very sensitive and controversial topic.

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Micheal Jackson walks into a bar?

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Chuck Norris was dropped twice when he was a baby, once on concrete and once on hardwood

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What is the biggest lie in the world? I have read and agree to the Terms of Service.

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So this blonde walks into a library.

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At first I was at the party and I was like YOLO!! But then I got pregnant and was like yolo....

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What did the vibrator say to the condom? Watch, I'll get laid before you do!!!

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Your mom is so poor; she doesn't have a job.

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Q: How many babies does it take to paint a wall? A: Depends on how hard you throw them.

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Whats louder than a dinosaur? 2 Dinosaurs

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guess what What? Apsolutly nothing

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A fat guy runs a marathon. He dies of obesity and dehydration.

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MWAAHHHHHAHAHHAH

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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