how much wood can a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood three wood

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What is long, hard, and full of semen? An erected penis.

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What do you call a bunch of mexicans jumping out of a truck a family with not alot of money to afford a car so they are forced to ride a truck that can barely fit them all

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A Jew walks into a bar The bar owner looks at a gang of punks in the back and shouts "YOU! GET OUT!" The Jew leaves the bar.

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why did the boy fall of the bridge? He got shot in the head.

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Knock knock Who's there? Doctor Doctor who? Good guess!

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Aye I heard somethin about yo mom WAT!!!!!!!!! She a bop

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Fill in the blank: A ______ is a man's best friend. Jake: Is it dog? Host: YES! Now for the 1 million dollars! Finish the sentence: I just saved a lot of money by Jake: Switching to Geico? Host: Sorry, that's incorrect. The correct answer is "I just saved a lot of money by not spending it on useless junk and by budgeting my account towards investing in the future." Oh well, nice try.

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josh- your a strange boy. liam- yes. due to by up bringing i have been exposed to unusual situations that most people do not encounter therefore affecting how i behave. Secondly the definition of normal is varying from person to person making being normal to every human being difficult to even the most capable of people. Essentialy Josh i care little for you comment. *josh was a black man who died of cancer 6 weeks after this incodent*

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Q: Why did the Little girl fall off the swing set? A: She was Shot in the face.

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Wanna hear a joke? The WNBA

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Adam Fantuzzi's just jealous because he'll never be the man his mother is

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What did the farmer say when he didn't like his tractor? Man, i don't like this tractor

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a man checks his brand new cellphone to see if he has a text message... He has cancer

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who wins a race a white guy or a black guy? depends who's faster

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Knock knock. Come in.

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Who has two thumbs and lost them? Me but I can't really point at myself due to the lack of thumbs.

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How did the man die? He was killed alive.

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Roses are red violets are blue, I more do like pink like the holes are in you.

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im gonna sue mcdonalds i asked for a hamburger and it was a beef burger -_-

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Good question, probably because I cannot get enough focus to "put a spell" on anyone because of my allergy, I use "autocast" for the rest. "Put a spell" I have not heard that since I was 14, that's really oldschool, and kinda geeky, back then it was code talk... Which is also geeky unless it actually serves a good purpose. AAAND... I served my mandatory time in the army as a minesweeper, we got attacked by fucking allies because of a... Yeah, I killed, people on our same team, still bad people, they offed about everybody else until I showed up, long story short, yeah I offed four of them, but that's like ten years ago.. My turn, you really got a crush on me dont you?

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2 black people and a mexican are in a car. Who's driving? The black person because they decided it would save gas if they all carpooled to their job.

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Boyfriend: Why are you so negative all the time? Girlfriend: I'm not! I'm positive! Boyfriend: No your not your arguing with me right now and you... Narrator: The girl takes the pregnancy test and shoves it in the guys mouth kicks him in the nuts and runs out the door.

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A blonde, brunette, and a redhead walk into a bar. The redhead, growing tired of the constant ridicule directed at her from the other two, kills them. She pleads guilty to 3rd degree murder on two counts and is sentenced two life sentences in a maximum security prison in Cambodia.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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