What did the black kid get for christmas? Nothing, he doesn't celebrate christmas

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What's the difference between a black person and a white person? They have different skin tones.

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Why couldn't the dog say anything to the cat? It was born deaf.

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Listen, I do not really care anymore, I admit it, I dont mind screwing with people, but if your name is Tifa, my name is lets see... Solid Snake, yeah, but call me big boss. Listen, be honest with me, if you do not trust me, just do not give me a random name, Tifa as in Tifa Lockheart? Final Fantasy? Wake up, girl/guy, you are losing your touch at this.

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Knock knock Who's there? To To who? No, Sir, it is "to whom"

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I used to be an adventurer, but then I decided to retire.

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How many gay men does it take to change a lightbulb? Usually, it takes one gay male to complete this action.

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When life gives you melons you may be dyslexic.

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what has two legs and is red all over a fireman doing his job

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why did the hedge hog cross the road? To get to his 'flat' mate!!

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A businessman walks out of a store with his new haircut he was bald.

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How do you make an electrician cry? You cut off his friend's penis.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have Alzheimers, Cheese on toast.

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Two guys walk into a bar, one is treated for a concussion.

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Why did the patient die of aids disorder? Butt sex. Lots and lots of butt sex.

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A duck walks up to a lemonade stand, as asks the man running the stand, "Hey, got any grapes?" The man suffers a heart attack from the shock of a talking duck

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in soviet russia, cow milks you

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There are too many people in this bar, a man says. He then walks out of the bar and proceeds to visit his grandmother. Orange.

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What's worse than a guy staring at you? Two guys staring at you.

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A black man walks into a bar. The bartender, upon seeing him, asks him to leave. The black man is enraged by the blatant racism shown by this man, and proceeds to punch the bartender repeatedly. After 5 minutes of non-stop punching the man stops, looks at his victim, and is filled with remorse. He is dead. Upon looking around, the black man notices scaffolding and building equipment scattered around the room. He falls to the ground as he realizes the bar is still under construction, and unable to serve customers this early in development. The bartender was simply asking the man to leave for his own safety.

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What do Whitney Houston and MTV have in common? They both REALLY died in the 90's.

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IF circles are squares and squares are purple and i dont know what im talking about does that make all potatoes orange?

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Holy mother moley! Britain just brexited! Now there's no more Britain. Britain is all gone.

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If Chuck Norris has $5, and you have $5, Chuck Norris still has more money than you.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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