Why don't flowers bite you when you pick them? Cuz they don't have a brain.

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Why did the blonde go to the post office? Because she received a phone call from them indicating that there was a package for her.

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Why did the boy eat his bagel? He was hungry.

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What's harder than nailing seven dead babies to a tree? My erection while doing it.

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A handicapped man walks into a bar...

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What is worse than being bitten by a snake? Being bitten twice! - Louis

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Do homeless people get knock-knock jokes?

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Q:Which side of a chicken has more feathers? A:The outside.

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What is wrong with black stereotypes? Nothing! Basketball is pretty fun if you try it!

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you mooma's like a bowling bowl i pick her up finger her throw her down the gutter and she still comes back for more

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S.O.P.A

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A mathematician, a physicist, and an engineer walk into a bar. They order some drinks, sit quietly and stare at their shoes until they've finished their drinks, then go back home and wallow in loneliness, wishing their social skills weren't so abysmal.

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why did the koala fall out of the tree? it was dead

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

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A stoner walks into a bar. A few minutes later he is asked to leave by the bartender because he is disruptive and uncoordinated. The stoner leaves because conflict is not in his nature.

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So I was flirting with a girl at a bar the other day when this huge black guy walks up and says "Hey honey". I realized that I still had some un-addressed prejudices in me as he shook my hand, pointed out that it was a mistake anyone could make, and introduced me to a girl he had met at the college he works at.

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Why couldn't the old man see the Moon? Because he was blind and it was daytime.

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they call me the green lantern because my little sister died in chemical fire

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Why did the kid get athsma? Genetics.

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Why do women love Panera Bread? They think it's healthy.

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A woman was at a family reunion and her husband's mother walked in. She has a chocolate allergy so the woman says the her husband,"I need more chocolate!"

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Why can't Jade Goody go swimming? Because she's dead.

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Why did the girl fall off the fridge? She tripped on a rock.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because no cars were coming.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops