"Knock, Knock," a man called out. A child threw open the door and peered out at him. "Why didn't you just knock instead of saying 'knock knock'?" Flustered, the man couldn't come up with an answer, and the child promptly closed the door, locked it, and returned to her previous activities.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

i hate you.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

1100110001012....HOLY S@&$ A 2!

thumb_up thumb_down -49

What did one cannibal say to the other while they were eating a clown? Well, I couldn't understand them... It's hard to pronounce anything clearly when your mouth is full, which is why you don't eat and speak simultaneously.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What did the over confident jack-ass say to the hot girl, You'll do.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Knock knock. Who's there? Schizophrenia.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Amanda Knox walks home free.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Adam and Eve ate the apple and felt a bit ashamed and stuff. God looked upon them and said, well its just a fucking apple get outta here you kids! Adam and Eve also took things a bit too literal

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Yo mama so fat, her wand is a Slim Jim

thumb_up thumb_down -31

A dog walks into a bar and orders a pint of beer The barman replies : Woof Woof

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Everybody will die

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it wanted to.

thumb_up thumb_down -35

How do you know when Taylor Swift is dead? When you don't hear Boyfriend songs anymore

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Boner

thumb_up thumb_down -17

How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? Well, there is no way to accurately estimate this number being that 1.woodchucks in fact do not chuck wood and 2. there is no time frame given for said action to take place

thumb_up thumb_down -20

A man walks into a bar and only gets a glass of water due to the fact that he is a recovering alcoholic.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Q: Why did you get raped last week? A: Because at night you touch yourself to pictures of rapists.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Find the b dddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddd

thumb_up thumb_down -39

What's worse than an arrow to the knee? -A bullet in the head.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

You know what makes me smile? Face muscles.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What's room temperature and tastes like ice cream? Melted ice cream

thumb_up thumb_down -20

A man named Cecil walks into a bar. He then orders a drink.

thumb_up thumb_down -39

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was crudely stapled to another chicken who insisted on doing so.

thumb_up thumb_down +34

Thats what she said

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops