How did Matt stop the robbers? He called the police.

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Q: What did the serail rapist say to his best friend? A: You're a good friend

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Your mamma's so obese that she can't stand up. She's been like this for years. That's because she's dead. She died of cardiovascular-related diseases.

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What do you do with a leg less dog? Take him for a drag.

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why wont our kids have time to socialize? because theyll all be too busy trying to find a solution for global warming.

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roses are red, violets are blue i couldnt spend one night without you

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Why'd the second squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was tied to the first one.

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What player wears number 8 and plays for liverpool? Steven Gerrard

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a read head, a brunet, and a blonde sneak into a merchant ship. security hears some noises and goes on to investigate. all three girls jump into banana sacks. security guard kicks the first sack with the read head in it and she growls like a dog, so the security sees its a dog and keeps on walking. he then kicks the sack with the brunet in it, she goes on to hiss like a cat. so then the security guard kicks the last sack with the blonde in it, and she yells out "bananas!"...the end

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So, two black guys walk into a bar... And they pay their tab and couldn't have been more courteous

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Why did the baby cross the road? It doesn't matter. He was hit by a bus.

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What's worse than a bee sting? 2 bee stings. What's worse than 2 bee stings? A Holocaust. What's worse than a Holocaust? 3 bee stings.

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What did the cookie ask the glass of milk? Will you wash me down

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Why was O.J acquitted for murder? A jury of his peers deliberated for many days and found there was not sufficient evidence for his conviction.

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What do you call a guy with an ax in his chest? An ambulance.

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no.

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How did Helen Keller's parents punish her? They gave here a timeout, like any other sensible parent would.

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Here's another:

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what's shaped like a tree? a tree

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whats fat and sits on a toilet? a fat guy sitting on the toilet

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Q. Why did the chicken cross the road? A.Because that's where it wanted to go.

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A man walks into a bar and orders some grapes. The bartender says he does not have any grapes available. The man leaves.

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What's worse than losing your job? Getting brutally sodimized and murdered by a serial rapist.

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Why did timmy fall off his bike? Someone threw a fridge at hm

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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