How do you help someone stop drowning You take your foot off the back their head.

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why did the mom beat up her son with downs because he was matt daly

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Why is cheese yellow? Answer: I don't know, I was hoping that you would know.

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this kid named terry stockton lives in craig beach ohio is gay

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The holocaust.

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Gotta go Fast Gotta go Faster Faster Fasterfasterfaster! Moving at the speed of sound I'm the quickest hedgehog around Got ourselves a situation Start getting a new location Without any explanation On top of relaxation! Go- Go- Go- Don't blink Don't think Just Go go go go G-g-g-g-go go! Sonic, he's on the run Sonic, he's number one Sonic, he's coming next so watch out for Sonic X! Gotta go fast, gotta go faster faster faster fasterfasterfaster Go go go go go go go go go! Sooooniiiiic X!!

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what happens on labor day? the day she has a baby... ya your having a kid

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Q. What do you get when a banana and a person mate? A. The banana suffocates

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Roses are brown Violets are brown Everything's brown Who shit on my flowers

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What do you call a mouse that sings? Justin Bieber

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What do you say to Jews at a synagogue? Hitler is coming

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Q: What do you call a black guy with an air plane? A: A pilot you racist bastard!

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whats small and blue? a suffocated baby

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So I was walking down the road today

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why did the chicken cross the road? who knows, we cannot read an animals (or a human for that matter) mind. Perhaps, though unlikely as he's a chicken, he saw a friend across the road or a child who wants to stroke him. Perhaps he is trying to escape being used as a circus act or being cooked for a supermarket. We cannot complain if the chicken wishes for a better life. Anyway, we shall never know why the chicken decided to cross the road, and never will, as it is dead after being hit by a car.

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Guy 1: So who did you have sex with? Guy 2: I was Fucking Austria. Guy 1: What do you mean? Guy 2: Look it up.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A Jew is a person who adheres to the Jewish faith and claims a cultural or ancestral connection to the Jewish people, and a pizza is an oven-baked, flat, disc shaped bread usually topped with tomato sauce and mozzarella and then a selection of meats, depending on taste and culture.

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like for a handjob.

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CHIIIICKKIIIIIIIN!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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A white straight man, a black gay man, and an Asian bisexual woman walk into a bar. They are enjoying their drinks until one overly intoxicated man makes a remark towards the group in reference to their diversity in race, sexual orientation, and sex. The bar crowd is enthused with the drunk man's genius in not only constructing a joke to cover all three categorical descriptions of the group, but in guessing each member's sexuality based on their respective appearances.

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What's the difference between a brick and Ricky? A brick gets laid and has a higher iq

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Roses are gold Violets are blue I am color blind

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why did the midget beat the basketball player in a foot race? the basketball player got bit by a scorpion and died within minutes.

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Who you gonna call? Gobstoppers

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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