What do you call a man with a spade in his head? An ambulance.

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My life has been getting worse and worse since I developed cancer.

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What's big, red and eats rocks? A big, red Rock-Eater

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How do you get a bunch of Jews in a car? You tell this family who happens to be of Jewish faith that they are going to be late for the birth of another family member's child. How do you get them out? Tell the mother had a miscarriage. This will make them promptly want to leave the care and grieve with the other family members for the lost child.

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why did the kangaroo jump? because its a kangaroo

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Flawed genetics? I am just sad, but then again I am a crybaby, mind sharing a bit more with me? I mean you wont call me wont you? You are not keeping me a secret from anyone right?

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? -Hey! Where's my tractor?

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knock knock knocking on heavens douoor

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Whats numbing and smells like burning toast? A stroke.

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Q: Whats big, strong, black, and sexy? A: Your imaginary dick

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What did the Hobo get for Christmas? Nothing,He celebrated Hanukkah.

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What is the difference between a Mexican and a bench? One is a person and one is an inanimate object

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what do you call a black man on the moon? an astronaut.

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Alt F4

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Your mom is soo fat that when God said "let there be light" he had to ask her to move

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Why was the horse sad? Because it seen a Tesco van in the distance.

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;( ;( ANTIJOKE Write Your Own --------------------------------------------------------- It's easy to take part, just type your text below! Enter the following: I AM NOT A HUMAN Your Answer SOLVE media I AM NOT A HUMAN I have read and agree to the Terms of Service - View Terms of Service Submit

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Whats worse than seeing your family killed in front of your eyes? Not much to be honest

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What did the African get for dinner? Ebola Rice

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Why did the man die when he hugged the pillow? He was hallucinating at the grand canyon.

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-Bumper Sticker- Honk if you love Jesus. (Text while driving if you want to meet him)

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So a horse walks into a bar... I forget the rest of the joke but you're mom is a whore..

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Q. What's a pirate's favorite type of movie? A. It depends on the individual pirate, although most modern-day pirates are from third world countries like Somalia and so are too poor to be able to watch many movies. Classical pirates like those depicted in Treasure Island or Pirates of the Carribean are, of course, from a period of history before movies had been invented, so couldn't possibly have had a favorite.

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Dont joke about the holocaust. My grandfather died there, he fell off the guard tower.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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