How do you blindfold an asian? step 1: Fold your blindfold into a triangle step 2: Wrap blindfold around the head of the asian step 3: Tie the blindfold on the back of the asians head step 5: You forgot 4 step 6: Your finished step 4: Tighten the blindfold Now you know how to blindfold an asian ˜´??

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Why do gay guys like push pops? Because they are a delicious lollipop treat.

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A gay man walks down a street before being stabbed to death by a homophobe.

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Im taking a shit right now.

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Why was the Jewish man in jail? He lit a local CVS on fire.

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Knock Knock Who's there I have Alzheimer's I have Alzheimer's who? Knock Knock

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Why is Jesus not real? Because Chuck Norris is still alive.

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What is the answer to the question of life? Over 9000

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why did the dog jump into the pool? because the cat was chasing him

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what is the worst thing a bout four black men driving a Cadillac off a cliff? they were my friends

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So I showed my friend my blind dog. He said, "Wow I've never seen a blind dog before!" I said, "they havnt seen you either."

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Why did the girl fall off the swing ? Because she lost her balance and the force of gravity put upon her was too great for her to bear, resulting in her fall.

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Coach: Hey, you missed the team meeting today, but I wanted to let you know we've had a number of changes to the lineup. Player: Really? Who's on first? Coach: That's right. A man with the unlikely name of Mr. Who is on first. We also have Mr. What on second, and Mr. I Don't Know is on third. The rest of the team is the same. Player: Oh. People have weird names now. But I'm sure they're great guys. Thanks for explaining that. Coach: Any time. Don't mention it.

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Which one is hardest?

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No, you think faster smarter and harder than everyone I know, you change and adapt faster for each day, sometimes I just think one has to stop asking oneself what makes one happy, and simply choose to be happy.

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what is the best way to stand out from the croud? open up your butt hole and take a video for to put on dat jumbotron

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What did the little orphan girl get for christmas? nothing her parents are dead

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. I'm terrible at poems. Potato.

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How do black people gain access to houses? Through the front door.

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What's funnier than the holocaust? Just about everything seeing how the holocaust is not a funny event, but rather enormous tragedy.... Assholes.

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Q: What's not funny and has three wheels? A: The Holocaust, I lied about the wheels and about not being funny.

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So a train conductor is going at 70 mph to to a destination 50 miles away. He goes over 3 hills, one at 20 mph, the other 42 mph, and the last at 63 mph. he crosses 2 bridges at 47 mph each. What did the train conductors mom eat for dinner that night Nothing she had cancer and died.

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human centipede

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I'm attracted to you like the earth is attracted to the sun. With a force that is inversely proportional to the distance squared.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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