A Palestinian woman asks a man for directions. She is promptly stoned to death.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What did little ben get for christmas? A dead grandma

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What is little,red and its in the corner??? -strawberry in the corner

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Roses are red Violets are blue Tulips are white Dandelions are yellow

thumb_up thumb_down +7

How many Jews can you fit into a car? About 5 or 6. It depends on the size of the car.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

3 out of 4 questions. The lion king was holding a meeting and every animal was there except for one. What animal wasn't there? The elephant. It was still in the fridge.

thumb_up thumb_down -117

Q - What do you call a hamburger without pickles? A - You call it a hamburger just without the pickles.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

How do you get four gay guys on a bar stool? With teamwork and coordination, each could place one foot on the seat, and they can all stand up using each other for balance and support. The fact that they are gay in unimportant.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

A dog walks into a bar. It was a bar in Taiwan, so they killed it and ate it.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Roses are red, violets are blue. Cassidy's a whore so open the door.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Roses are red violets are blue I have a pie would you like some?

thumb_up thumb_down +9

whats red, brown and blown up? a hampster in a microwave

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Have you ever tried ethiopian food? No. Neither have they

thumb_up thumb_down +46

What has three legs, one eye, and is green and fuzzy. I don't know. Me either.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

How do you spot a paedophile in a playground? You don't, there are usually a lot of adults around.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Susie is 14 & she never listens to her mom, why is that? She's deaf.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

A Jewish, Italian, and Russian man are stranded on an island. Eventually the Russian man dies from heatstroke, leaving the other two to decide whether or not to feast on his remains. The Italian eventually goes mad and tries to murder the Jewish man who is forced to defend himself and kill his remaining friend. Shortly after, the Jewish man is eventually rescued by a passing German vessel after suffering severe dehydration and malnourishment and hanging on only by his faith in God. As they are leading him to safety, the Jewish man eventually summons the strength to tell his saviors about the horrible things he has done and all he has gone through, not knowing if he'll ever be able to forgive himself. His German rescuers take one awkward look at him, and don't know what to say to help him, leading afterwards to several years of PTSD therapy and rehabilitation.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

yes i can connor, this is brett.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

if life gives you lemons...chuck them back and say i wanted muffins instead!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +20

what good about eatting every night knowing that a african want

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Keep talking shit bitch, and I'll come for you!

thumb_up thumb_down

Doctor, my husband tells me he doesn't like my figure .... That's irrelevant now, you've contracted a rare blood disease and will be dead within a month.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

While out looking for sex last week I met a hooker who looked like a rhino. I said to her, "Do you charge?" She said, "Sir, I am arresting you under the Street Offences Act 1959. You do not have to say anything. But it may harm your defence if you do not mention when questioned something which you later rely on in court."

thumb_up thumb_down -14

I just had major Deja Vu... Cool, Brett. No one cares.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops