What happens when you finish a bottle of Sprite? You finish it

What's grey and can't swim? A Castle

What's worst than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust.

why did the man crash a plane into the twin towers? he was a clumsy terrorist going for the sears tower

Knock knock. Hello dear. Come in.

Yo mamma so mexican she brought tacos to the dinner table

If you want to paint a wall red, what is the fastest way to paint it with a crying baby? The baby will get very annoying and delay your wall from being painted so you put it in its crib in another room until you are done.

Girls

Ethan's girlfriend is a salg hahahahahahahahahahahaha fucking meff she needs to die

Why did Billy get a 102% on his Algebra test? He got all of the questions correct including the bonus question. Oh, and he slept with the teacher.

Why Jimmy doesn't listen to his mother? Because he's deaf

What's the difference between a box of dead babies and a Lamborghini? I don't have a Lamborghini in my garage

3 guys get stuck in a island and find indians and the indians say the three guys have to stick 10 of the same fruits up there or they die. The first guy came back with oranges but stops at 3 then gets killed. the second had grapes and stop at 2 and gets killed. But in heaven the first guy ask why did you stop at 2 there grapes. the second guy said he saw the third with a pineapple.

Whys it so cold? Nuclear winter.

Q: What did Helen Keller say to the bartender? A: "I would like a bud lite please" it was a different Helen Kellar

Q: What did Robin Williams say to the young boy? A: Nothing, He is dead

What did the guy say when he came out of the closet? Where's my green shirt?

A woman goes into a butchers with her baby. She says "I live a few doors down and my scales are broken, do you mind weighing my son?" The butcher takes the boy away and a short while later returns holding a dripping bag. "He's 17lbs two ounces" he informs her, as his colleague brings the boy to the counter safe and well.

A van drives into a car. An hour earlier, the man who was driving the van walked into a bar.

How do you fit 1000 Jews into a car? You can't. You'd need a much larger vehicle.

Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know, It's none of my business.

What's so similar about a zombie and a black man? They are both almost human.

what do you call a man that has a terminal illness and is named James - James

So a clown walks up to you and asks, "What'll always STICK with you? The violent disposition of humanity."

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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