What did the chicken do before it crossed the road? Looked both ways and then crossed with caution while looking out for oncoming vehicles.

how did the girl fall off the swing. BECAUSE SHE HAD NO ARMS HAHAHAH

KEVIN CRUMMY KEVIN CRUMMY KEVIN CRUMMY KEVIN CRUMMY KEVIN CRUMMY KEVIN CRUMMY KEVIN CRUMMY KEVIN CRUMMY KEVIN CRUMMY KEVIN CRUMMY KEVIN CRUMMY KEVIN CRUMMY KEVIN CRUMMY KEVIN CRUMMY KEVIN CRUMMY KEVIN CRUMMY KEVIN CRUMMY KEVIN CRUMMY KEVIN CRUMMY KEVIN CRUMMY KEVIN CRUMMY KEVIN CRUMMY KEVIN CRUMMY KEVIN CRUMMY KEVIN CRUMMY KEVIN CRUMMY KEVIN CRUMMY KEVIN CRUMMY KEVIN CRUMMY KEVIN CRUMMY KEVIN CRUMMY KEVIN CRUMMY KEVIN CRUMMY KEVIN CRUMMY KEVIN CRUMMY

Why did the goose cross the road? He was playing duck, duck, goose

Have you ever tried Ethiopian food? Neither have they.

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

A black man and a white man were in a fight. Who won? I don't know. It was pay-per view and I didn't buy it.

A 8 year old kid and his dad are having quality time at the park,and relax at a nearby picnic bench after a thrilling game of tag."I love you." says the son. The father about to respond,promptly gets shot by 3 stray military issue assault rifle bullets that came from a heated dispute about a stolen car that got way out of hand. He dies,and the kid ran crying a long distance away. After he gets himself in a dark alley with nobody else around he laughs,and mutters "The plan went perfectly!" He pulls out a detonator and presses it. The White House,Washington Monument,and several nuclear power plants across the continental United States blow up,killing millions of people.The child,also in possession of nuclear bombs, holds the entire world hostage and becomes ruler of the entire planet Earth. Fin.

What's the same about eggnog and a computer? You can search the web. Except that's only true for one of them.

What did Anne Frank say to the Nazis who found her? Please be gentle.

Two women are sitting next to each other in a bar minding their own business.

What would happen if you insulted Chuck Norris' mother? Considering you did it on a messageboard that only unemployed people with no social lives use, nothing.

Woman's Rights.

When life gives you lemons, you throw them at your friends. If they throw them back, duck

Why are the new york knicks called the new york knicks.? no one gives a crap

Your computer runs so slow that I had to run a virus scan.

Why did the fat guy survive the plain crash He didn't he died like everyone else

Roses Are Red, Violets Are Blue, I Have Alzheimers, Cheese on Toast.

Whats red and black and has 8 legs? 4 dead african babies.

Whats the difference between a blonde and a mosquito? A mosquito is a common insect in the family Culicidae. A blonde on the other hand is a Homo sapiens, a primate species of mammal with a highly developed brain, belonging to the family of great apes, along with chimpanzees, bonobos, gorillas, and orangutans

What's the difference in a red sports car and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a red sports car in my garage.

dead babies

Q. What does the pencil and the basketball have in common? A. They both are made from wood, except for the basketball.

cats are pussies

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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