what did the tree say to the person? nothing trees cant talk

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What did one muffin say to the other? I don't know, but you need a psychiatrist.

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Why did the fall off the building? ... because I pushed her

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Q: What do you call a black guy selling drugs? A: A pharmacist

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Evil Witch: Hey Snow White, want an apple. Snow White: No thank you, I just ate, I'm good. Evil Witch: But its good! Snow White: No thanks, I'm good! Evil Witch: Ill put caramel on it!! Snow White: NO THANKS! Evil Witch: FINE!! The Evil Witch then pulled out an AK - 47 and violently murdered Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I'm a schizophrenic, and so am I.

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What do giant panda bears eat? giant bamboo

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Dude 1: Hey, ya see these coins here? Dude 2: ya, what about em'? Dude 1: would you say you see these pretty often? Dude 2: yup... :/ Dude 1: so would you call them COMMON CENTS!?!?!?!?!

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What makes Amish bread different than regular bread? It's made by Amish people

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What happens when you Shoot a guy with a red Shirt On? He Dies.

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28

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What do you call a woman with a penis? A Hermaphrodite.

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Two drums and a cymbal fall off a cliff. They all fall on a small boy below, putting him into a 20-year coma.

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Pickup line: Hey babe, do you work at a grocery store? Because I wanna spill some milk on the floor so they can call spill on aisle 9 and I'll be there waiting for you and watch you clean my mess.

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Knock knock whos there telephone telephone who telephone refiridgerator

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Q: What kind of punch do vampires drink ? A: None... It's really blood, you should know that by now.

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What do you call a black hitch-hiker? Stranded

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From SpongeBob SquarePants "Hey Patrick, wanna know what's funnier than 24??" - SpongeBob "What?" - Patrick " 25!!!!" - SpongeBob There are a lot of things that are funnier than 24 though.

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How do you make a napkin dance? You can't. Stop having such unrealistic aspirations.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a bagel.

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Why did George smoke weed? Because he was depressed after his wife died and couldn't get over the fact that he would be lonely forevermore.

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Q: Why was the man hit by the train? A: He was tied to the rail road tracks...

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press Ctrl and F4 on ur key pad

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oh hiya come in

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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