What's the difference between a duck? A toothbrush, because a car only has four doors!

A dog walks into a bar. The bartender was just about to leave, so he takes the dog home with him. He makes found dog signs and posts them around the neighborhood. The owner sees one of the signs and retrieves his pet from the bartender, thanking him for finding his dog.

Why did the bird fall out of the sky? Someone shot it.

Q: what did the man say to the wall A: Nothing it's a wall therefore incapable of talking

what was so bad about hitler? he inadvertently subjected his political officials to death by rope

Jack, John, Justin, Joseph and Jimmy walk into a bar. They order a pint of beer and start wondering what their names have in common.

What do you get if you cross a sheep and a kangeroo??? ... A sheep cannot be crossed with a kangaroo because the genes from sheep cannot work with genes from a kangaroo to produce hybrid sheegaroos or kangareeps.

womens rights.

What did one hand say to the other? Nothing, you fool, hands don't talk.

How do you make a plumer sad? You kill his children.

Why did the airplane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread

Why was the man wearing all white? He was a part of the Ku Klux Kan.

How do you prevent a drowning..? A: You don't throw the black man in the portwater

wat is the name of a girl u can play connect the dots on her face laurie pisciotta

Why is 6 afraid of 7. Because 7 is a registered sex offender.

How do you circumcise a cat? Shoot an orphan in the leg with a rail gun.

What do you call Michael? A homosexual person who is nice, however he is still gay.

When an anvil and a feather are dropped off a building the anvil will hit the ground first because it's heavy

when god gives you lemons, you find a new god!

An attractive naked woman walks into a bar. Everyone is surprised, and all the straight men, gay women and bi-sexual men and women in the bar are sexually aroused.

A man walks into a restaurant and ordered a soup. Then, he called the waiter and said the soup tasted funny. The waiter said, "so laugh". the man then killed the guy and sips the soup while laughing.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He realized he was in the ghetto

Yo mama so fat, when the waiter handed her the menu, she said "yes"

Knock, knock -Who's there? Help -Help who? Im dying of lukemia

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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