What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Knock knock Who's there? Prost Prost who Prostitute

thumb_up thumb_down +9

My neighbor's kid was running around yelling magical spells. I said "Wow, you really want to be like Harry Potter, don't you?". He said "Yes!". So, I killed his parents and locked him under the stairs.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

shoe and shoelace. one is meaningless without the other

thumb_up thumb_down +38

What do you do when you have 2 eggs, but only want to use 1? I don't know. I guess you could just use 1 of them and save the other for another time?

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What did the two doctors say to each other? We are both doctors.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What is worse than falling down the stairs? Having leukemia.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Want to hear a dirty joke? A pig fell into the mud.

thumb_up thumb_down +56

A brunette, a redhead and a blonde are on the run from the police. They see a barn, and decide to hide inside it. They find three burlap sacks, and each hide in one. The police enter the barn, arrest each of the girls, and sentence them to life imprisonment for murder.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What happened to the man who posted yet another repeated joke on anti joke? Nothing. He posted an old joke that everyone has seen a form of already.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

A girl talks to her boyfriend about collage. What is his responce? Nothing. No one talks about college.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the chipmunk fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the monkey.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

One day a mexican guy came up with a great anti-joke about jewish guys. Upon sharing it with a canadian buddy of his, he collapsed and died from a cerebral hemorrhage where he was then hit by a bus and mauled to bits by a pack of saber-tooth tigers.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What did the homicidal maniac say to his 13th victim? Nothing, she was dead at the time.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What's blue and fluffy? Blue fluff.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

knock knock who is there? Jehovah's Witness... IT IS the desire of Jehovah's Witnesses that you become better acquainted with them. You may have met them as neighbors and fellow employees or in other daily affairs of life. You may have seen them on the street, offering their magazines to passersby. Or you may have spoken briefly with them at your door. Actually, Jehovah's Witnesses are interested in you and your welfare. They want to be your friends and to tell you more about themselves, their beliefs, their organization, and how they feel about people and the world in which all of us live. To accomplish this, they have prepared this brochure for you. In most ways Jehovah's Witnesses are like everyone else. They have normal problems—economic, physical, emotional. They make mistakes at times, for they are not perfect, inspired, or infallible. But they try to learn from their experiences and diligently study the Bible to make needed corrections. They have made a dedication to God to do his will, and they apply themselves to fulfill this dedication. In all their activities they seek guidance from God's Word and his holy spirit.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Why was the boy dead? The boy was hit by a bus ran over by a train and stabbed to death by a murderer then put into a grinder for a meal for the murderer.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What do you call a person falling off a cliff Dead

thumb_up thumb_down -52

what do you get a man with no arms or legs for his birthday? a quick, painless death.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Roses are red, Metal is gray, Justin Beiber, is very gay

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Waffles ate my grandma

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Why cant little billy jump? He was aborted.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

What's for dinner? Flesh from when your brother was alive and your blood.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What did the girl say to her tits? I wanna suck u.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops