What did Abraham lincoln do after getting assassinated? Certainly not riding a bike thats for sure.

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

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What did Valerie get for her birthday? Nothing. Because no one loves her

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What do you call a helicopter above Hawaii? A helicopter.

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Why did suzie fall off the swing? Because She had no arms. Why did suzie fall off again? Becauze Jimmy was trying to snipe her in the head the first time

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I have magical powers. Try your best to not to follow these instructions: Ready? Go. You are now blinking your eyes. (strike 1) You are now breathing voluntary. (strike 2) You suddenly have an itch somewhere on your body. (strike 3) You lost. Thanks for playing my little game. Hope you enjoy thinking of a flying pink elephant with wings.

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Why was little David sad? His father got hit by a truck.

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If you're American outside of the bathroom, then what are you inside the bathroom? An American inside of a bathroom.

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kieran scott peels his off his foreskin while he watches hentai porn then he eats it afterwards, he is also on roids

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What's the difference from an muslim and a christian blonde Religion

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roses are red, violets are blue. sunflowers are yellow, i bet you were expecting something romantic but no this is just gardening facts.

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Q: What is your name? A: I don't know.

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WANNA HERE A JOKE? (no, i purposely clicked in this joke website to simply here to fulfill my demonic internet pleasures.)

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Why did the hipster burn his mouth on a piece of pizza? Because the pizza was on fire.

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knock knock who's there? a murderer. a murderer who? a murderer who kills you and your family.

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An Irish man walks into his home and orders a drink.

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A man walk into a bar. Just kidding he has no legs.

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Why did Elsa go into hiding. She died

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OMG YOU BOUGHT ME FLOWERS THANK YOU

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Why did the scientist go to the hospital? because he was experimenting with dangerous chemicals, and they exploded in his unsuspecting face. He doesn't have skin now.

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whats the difference between a jew and a pizza? a pizza does not have a heart

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Knock knock Who's there? Be Be who? Be yourself

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How can a chicken be dirty? It can be covered in dirt!

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what did the blond do after she turned 18? Reelected Obama.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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