Why did Johnny fall of the Swing?? Because i hit him with a shovel

Knock, knock. Who's there? Polite cow who recognizes normal social cues and civilly waits for its turn to contribute to a conversation. Polite cow who recognizes normal social cues and civilly waits for its turn to contribute to a conversation who? Moo.

Why are you on anti joke? Because your not funny enough to make your own jokes

What's worse than a rapist? 2 rapists

Why was the black man good at basketball? Because he practiced.

canada

How did the boy cross the road? He didn't he had polio.

Roses are red. Violets are blue. So is my eye. I get abused.

Hey, I just met you, And this is crazy, But I have cancer.

roses are red, violets are blue, I suck at rimes, refridgerator.

Listen Supervisor, this is Agent Clarke of the GOV and the WHO, I suggest you respond ASAP, I suggest you put set me in touch with either Lady, or Axel Knight right away, this is a matter of your personal security.

69

How do you change your dishwasher into a snowblower? Give her a shovel.

Q. Which one do you hate more? Jews, Mexicans, or Asians. A. I hate all of them, but jews are annoying when they resist getting stuffed in the oven.

What's better than winning the special Olympics? Not being retarded.

A man walks into a doctor's office, he pees in a cup and is diagnosed with diabetes.

How do you get a bear out of a tree with cheese? Camembert.

A farmer hears a knock at the door on a rainy night. He opens the door and welcomes an attractive young man in. The farmer gets his budding teenage daughter to fetch the man a towel. He dries himself off, thanks them both, and goes to bed. He's gone before anyone else wakes up and leaves a fifty on the table.

Do you know what one golf ball said to the other? Nothing they are lifeless objects

Whats the differance between a blond and a rock? I don't know. I can't think of any.

What do snowmen eat for lunch? Snowmen don't eat, they're inanimate balls of of solid precipitation with rocks for smiles and eyes and carrots for noses.

Roses are red Violets are red Tulips are red Bushes are red Trees are red OH SH*T MY GARDEN IS ON FIRE!!!!!

GINGERVITIS! 1. redhair 2.freckles 3.no soul 4.depression/anger 5.gay JLR

What's the only thing a Black Hole can't absorb? Nothing. It absorbs everything, even light.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...