I have a little dog. She likes being tossed high into the air. I need a new little dog as the last one was caught by a gust carrying here over the sound-dividing highway wall and dropped into traffic.

Q : What is the similarity between me and my friend? A : We both are crazy

A man walks into a bar. He goes up to the Bar Tender and says, "Hit me with all you got!" The bar tender then ducks down under the bar out of sight. He comes back up with a sledge hammer and viciously murders the man. Blood spews everywhere and many others are brutally murdered shortly afterwards. :)

4 people: A pilot, Bill Gates, the Pope, and a little kid, are all on an airplane with only 3 parachutes, when the plane's engine explodes and starts to go down. But the pilot makes an emergency landing at a nearby airport and everybody is okay.

Debating on internet is like competing in the paralympics, even if you win you're still retarded

How do you make a tissue dance? You put a little boogie into in!

A jewish man is sitting on a bench. A german man then proceeds to sit down next to him. They say nothing to each other.

What's the difference between Sony and Kony? Sony is a company which produces electrical appliances and Kony is a Ugandan Warlord.

What did the mother do when she find out her daughter left for the party? Nothing. She realized her daughter was old enough to make mature descions.

why did the cookie go to the doctor? he had to get a physical to be eligible for his school's football tryouts. his mom drove him there but was very careful not to get his hopes up too high since his chances of actually making the team were slim to none based on the fact that he had no arms or legs but only succulent chocolate chips in every bite.

A: Knock Knock B: ...

An itsy bitsy spider went up the water spout Down came my dick, and forced the spider out

Why did the baby stop crying? I hit him with a brick.

A mushroom walks into a crowded bar, the bartender says "we don't serve your kind here." Protestingly, the mushroom replies, "why not? I am a spore reproducing eukaryote!" Everyone stares as an awkward silence ensues.

Q: How fast does an F-16 fly? A: Pretty Fast

Guess what! What? huhuhuhuhuhuhuhuhuhu

KARMA KARMA KARMA KARMA CHAMELEON

i want to meet Dora's parents and ask them why they let that bitch go everywhere

what do eagles and chetos have in common....... they both can fly except for the chetos

Why Oscar lives with elephants in a zoo ? Because he's an elephant.

what did the lawyer say to the other lawyer we're both lawyers

Three women are seen walking while having ice cream. One of them is licking the ice cream. Another is sucking the ice cream, and the other one is biting the ice cream. One of these women is married. Which one is married? The one that has a wedding ring on her finger.

If there's something strange in your neighborhood. Who ya gonna call? The Police.

What does a black kid get for Christmas? Your bike

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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