How much cocaine did Charlie Sheen do? Enough to kill two and a half men

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What happens when a bunch of animals break into your house... they eat you.

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Why couldn't Jimmy drive the tractor? Because he didn't have any arms or legs. Why didn't he have any arms or legs? Because Jimmy was a Potato.

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Chuck Norris walks up to a baby and punches it in the face He walks away and laughs

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One day, Jimmy didn't wake up.

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Why is josh such a retard Because when he was born a brick fell on his head.

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Why did Helen Keller cross the road? To end her misery.

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What's red, black, and green all over? A dead black bear. Just no green.

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Why couldn't the blonde bride make it to her own wedding? She had another unplanned circumstance occur and the wedding was postponed until next week.

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So a man walks into a bar, right?

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You see that dog over there with no tail? You know what that means, don't you? What? Someone cut it off.

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Roses are red, Violets are purple, not fucking blue.

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I need a good anti joke....

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what do u say when u steal something? STOLEN!!!!!!!!!

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What do you call a man who walks at your door in a Saturday morning? A jehovah witness.

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So there's a black man riding a bike down the street. A police officer pulls him over to tell him that his back tire seems to be flat. The black man says thank you, and continued riding his bike. Later, he would repair his tire.

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A Mexican walks into an all white people bar. He then proceeds to buy rounds for everyone in the bar. Everyone thanks the mexican and everyone gets back to doing their own thing.

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What did the red-haired barber say to the father who abandoned him at birth? Nothing. The father sat to the side and read a magazine as the barber cut the hair of his legitimate child, failing to recognize the irony of the situation.

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What's brown and sticky? A stick

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Did you hear about the guy who got his whole left side cut off? Now he is dead..

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Why was the black man escorted from the bar? Because the bartender was racist.

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Q: What's better than winning a gold medal at the Special Olympics? A: Not struggling with a debilitating mental or physical handicap.

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Why couldnt i think of an anti-joke? cuz i was too high and a fly distracted me

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You know how we have iPods? OJ Simpson strangled his wife.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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