Q: How to fit 10 babies in a suitcase? A: By blender Q: How to get the babies out of the suitcase? A: Using a straw.

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whats red and falls from a tree an apple

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why was six afraid of seven? because seven eight nine

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Why did the black guy buy spray paint? To paint his fence, to keep it from rotting away.

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purple pickles

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You sick fiend

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Why did Jessy crawl to her bed? Because she has no legs.

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I found an iPhone on the ground at lunch during school. I said, "Wow, I can't believe I just found an iPhone on the ground at lunch during school." Later that day, my principal gassed the kindergarten classrooms with cyanide while shouting, "GO RAIDERS!"

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Why am I sad right now? Because I just Sh*t my pants.

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Q: what do you get when you mix a bull dog and a shiitzu? A: a dog

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chinga tue madre Ryan

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Roses are Verbotten Violets are Verbotten Anti-jokes is Verbotten Everything is Verbotten boats aren't Verbotten

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What's 9+10? 19.

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What did the car do? CRASH!

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How do you make an apple puff? Put the apple in a large pan with some water. Cover and cook gently for 20-25 minutes until soft. Add sugar and nutmeg to taste. Transfer to a bowl and leave to cool. Cover with pastry and bake until well-risen and golden.

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How did the Muslim blow up? He accidentally left his gas on and after a while sparked up a cigarette.

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What did the lady find when she walked through the door? Her husband stabbing himself to death because she ate his cornflakes

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A hill billy went fishing

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An Englishman an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar. The barman notices this rather humorous cliche and proceeds to point it out, laughs are shared by all.

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What do you get when you mix 5 bottles of beer, a bottle of vodka, 3 glasses of red wine, and 15 jello shots? Alcohol poisoning.

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Ask me if I'm a tree "are you a tree?" No

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Women's Rights

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how many licks does it take to get to the tootsie roll center of a tootsie pop!? thats what she said

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Fuzzy wuzzy was a bear. Fuzzy wuzzy had no hair. Fuzzy wuzzy had cancer.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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