Today, we will be identifying power tools. This is not a drill.

Ok, I'll go ask someone else.

DONT READ THIS. YOU WILL BE KISSED ON THE NEAREST POSSIBLE FRIDAY BYrnTHE LOVE OF YOUR LIFE.TOMMOROW WILL BE THE BEST DAY OF YOUR LIFE. NOWrnYOU'VE STARTED READING THIS. DON'T STOP. THIS IS SO FREAKY.rn1. say your name ten times.rn2.say your mom's name five times.rn3. say your crushes three timesrn4. paste this to four other groups.rnIf you do this, your crush will kiss you on the nearest Friday.rnBut if you read this and do not paste this, then yournwill have very bad luck.rnSEND THIS TO 5 GROUPS IN 143 MINUTES. WHENrnYOU'RE DONE PRESS F6 AND YOUR CRUSH'S NAME WILL APPEAR IN BIG LETTERSrnON THE SCREEN. THIS IS SO FREAKY BECAUSE IT ACTUALLY WORKSrnrnrn

Ask me if im an Airplane. Are your Airplane? Hell yes

Have a nice day! Dont tell me what to do.

Why did the baby die? Because he got shot in the head repeatedly.

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor?

What did the boy say during his math test? Nothing, talking during a test is prohibited.

Whats louder than a dinosaur? 2 Dinosaurs

Where does the Queen of England live? England.

Hey I had a wet and dirty dream about you last night. Really? What happened? You got hit by a bus and I pissed myself laughing. .......

I once shot an elephant in my pajamas. I suffer from a debilitating sleep disorder.

As if it helps your self esteem: Nothing yet, Be the first to comment.

Knock Knock Who's there? Max. Max who? Max who starts his greeting with,  "In accordance with Megan's law"  

What did the man with leprosy say to the prostitute? Keep the tip

What would Steve Jobs be doing today if he were alive? Dying.

Your Mama's so fat that the Doctor recommended a healthy eating diet, and to exercise daily.

What's funnier than a midget bungie jumping? Nothing

why did the chicken cross the road. to get to the other side. but it didnt. ROADKILL

What do you you call a mexican that jumped the border? successful

How do you get a black man out of a tree? Politely say "Hey you, get out of the tree."

A pilot walks into a bar just before his last flight of the day. "Give me a stiff one to get through this last flight, I've had a long day," the pilot tells the bartender. The bartender promptly refuses the pilot service and kicks him out of the bar, since operating an aircraft under the influences of alcohol would at least constitute gross negligence and at worst, murder.

There is an elephant, a zebra, a lion, and a black man. The black man is enjoying his visit to the zoo.

What did Batman say to Robin before they got into the car? Robin, get in the car.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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