What do you call a group of Mexicans jumping over a fence? I heat of runners trying out for the Mexican Olympic hurdle team.

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Its april fools day and a women is in labour and has to rush to the hospital. Her husband couldn't make it so it is just the doctor and her in the delivery room. 4 hours of labour go by and complications arise. 12 hours later she gives birth toa beautiful baby boy. The doctor wipes the baby off and goes to hand it to her but then suddenly pulls it back and kicks it a cross the room. The mother screamed "my baby boy!" and the doctor smiles and says "April fools! It was already dead!"

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Slowly being tortured to death.

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your mother eats so many chocolates and sugary confectionary that i would recommend a check up the the dentist.

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Why did the chicken kill himself To get to the other side.

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knock knock. Whos there? YELLOW PEOPLE

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roses are red violets are blue wanna hear a joke? WNBA....

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What did the guy say to the mushroom? You're a fungi

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What do you do if you are surrounded by 2000 Hungry cannibals? You talk to them in a calm yet determined diplomatic voice, then you become a part of them. Moral: A part of them... Forever.

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When the boy cried wolf who heard him? Not Helen Keller

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How many Jews can you fit in a one-person car? --One in the drivers seat, 30 million in the ashtray

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What do you call an underground train full of professors? It's very unlikely that the passengers on an underground train would consist entirely of professors, unless it was a special service booked solely for the attendees of highly specialised lectures which required each audience member to have completed a professorship.

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What's living, purple, yellow, and green? Nothing.

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What did the blonde do when she missed bus 40? She waited 30 minutes for it to come back around again.

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Q: What's green, fuzzy, and if it falls out of a tree it will kill you? A: A pool table

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A Jew, a Christian, and a Muslim walk into a bar. A good time was had by all, until closing time.

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If a plane crashes on the border of America and Canada, where do you bury the survivors? Somewhere discreet where no one will find them

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Why do black people eat watermelon? Because it is a largely water-based, delicious fruit that provides refreshment in such a hot country and conveniently flourishes in the said climate.

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yo mama so old she was a waiter at the last supper.

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What's the difference between a mole and dynamite? - Moles don't explode... unless you fill them with dynamite.

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How many dead babies can you fit in a trash can? 12

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What did the Unicorn do with the Portal gun? Nothing. Neither of them are real.

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What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Stolen property that you should return immediately because the consequences of shop-lifting can prevent you from getting a good job and might land you in prison.

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When does the ice cream get thrown at the yellow horse on thursday evening? Purple Monkey Rainbow

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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