why did the child go to school? Because he wants to succeed in life

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what is long black and smelly the welfare line

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she didn't have woman's rights Knock knock Who's there? NOT Sally, she's in the kitchen

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Whats the best thing about having sex with twenty eight year olds? There's twenty of them.

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A guy walked into a bar, ouch.

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Whats Big, Brown, and smells like Horse Crap? Horse Crap

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roses are red, violets are blue, some poems rhyme, some dont

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roses r red violets r blue u jumped in the air and saw a planet to

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--"Do you like impressions?" -Yeah! --"Why?" ................... --"That was Socr-ates."

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I meant to state that I threatened to kill him unless he refused to state that I broke his knees (and broke his wrists, I forgot to mention that too, such misery... ...Give a real man a chance here, its not every day I have to kill my mother... But you still wont hear me whining about it, asked my wife if she forgave me if I spent the rest of the day smirking, after all my mother "had visions" where my wife was Satan, which is fun, since I was also Satan the day I was born... Because my name is Nero... A NAME SHE GAVE ME! Still, not very dignifying getting the shit beat out that old hag because she was on some blend of angel dust, and still not so fun killing her by biting half her neck off... ...Literally not so fun, kinda fun? You bet, tasted disgusting, watching her choke to death was...Lets just say I have shared enough joy with you for one day.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? There was food on the other side

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how do you kill 1000 Ethiopians? throw a mars bar off a cliff!

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Why couldn't the blind man see his friend? He was behind him.

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Ask me if I'm a carrot Are you a carrot? No

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Why did the boy die of Cancer? Because I took some radioactive chemicals and hen I feel like it I beat him with it.

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What did the man say to the man? Awkward.

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What do Sandusky and micheal Jackson have in common? They are both white.

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An Aussie, a Mexican and an Asian walk into a bra. You read that wrong.

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Yo Mama is so fat that she has to wear large clothes.

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What's the difference between a Toyota Camry and 20 dead babies? I don't have 20 dead babies in my garage.

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Are you a human?

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What's funnier than the pope in a speedo? Humor is subjective, so answers vary from person to person.

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How many jews does it take to change a light bulb? None, you don't have to be jewish to change a light bulb

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My Friend Philip had his lip removed today. he is just Phil now.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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