What happened after Jimmy fell off the cliff? He died.

What did my Grandmother get for Christmas? Alzheimer's.

What looks like a 50p and has a narrow back?

Person 1: Did you hear the one about the guy who drank vinegar? Person 2: No Person 1: Oh

What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

how many Mexicans does it take to fix a light bulb? One, a Mexican can fix any thing.

How much booze did the homeless man drink? All of it. He is severely depressed.

What's slower than mollasses? Your fattass mother!

What bug has eight legs? Not a spider.

Why was the school field trip cancelled? The Holocaust.

Q: Why did the dead baby cross the road??? A: It was stapled to the chicken.

Refridgerator.

What happened when the roof fell on a young boy? Nothing. He was an orphan.

How many licks does it take for a pedophile to get to the center of a Tootsie Pop? Given a simple random sample of pedophiles, they will most likely have the same statistical standard normal distribution of tongue sizes and saliva efficacy as any other part of the population. Therefore, that question in regards to the tongues of pedophiles is irrelevant and remains unanswered.

What did hitler say when he spilt coffee all over himself Ow I am burnt

WHO LET THE GHOST OUT! BOO BOO BOO BOO BOO! Mortals: That was a bit funny...

There's a skunk and a lawyer standing on the side of the road, what's the difference? There are tire marks infront of the skunk.

The boy asks his dad if he can make him a sandwitch The dad reply's " no thats your moms job"

What's the difference between a pheromone and a hormone? Hormones are secreted internally and trigger various biochemical pathways that cause certain effects. We all are familiar with the effects of testosterone and estrogen, both on the anatomy, and behaviour of humans. Pheromones are secreted externally, and have an effect on another creature in similar ways. Usually they have to do with attracting sexual partners or changing a sex partners behaviour or body in some way.

roses are red violets are blue I have five fingers and the middle one is for u

Why did the toddler fall in the pool? He was irresponsibly left unattended outside and tripped on the edge of the pool. He died within two minutes and his parents were blamed for his death.

What did Helen Keller say after the Iron Maiden show? Nothing, she is a mute.

Teacher:What is the outer layer of a tree? Dog:Bark. Teacher: What is the square root of 69? Dog:8.30662386

How long does it take for a Jew to die being gased. Same as anyone else.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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