A Squirrel gets ready for hybernation. 21 You Stupid

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What did the rabbit say to the frog? If you think the rabbit said anything, you need to see a psychiatrist.

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How do you put an elephant in a refridgerator? Go to your local zoo with a shotgun, shoot to kill, load elephant in Uhaul, drive home, remove elephant from Uhaul, sharpen your ax, put on mask to pevent excessive blood on face, begin to chop elephant into small chunks, put the chunks into ziplock bags, call a friend to help you move bags into refridgerator, and move bags into refridgerator. Once all the bags are in the refridgerator, dismiss your friend, get in car, and drive to mexico because killing an elephant is not legal and the police will be there soon. Now as for the giraffe...

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What's worse than finding out your friend is gay? Being gang-raped.

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Your mother is so ugly, her genes were passed down through two generations, and now your children are of a similar caliber of ugliness. I'm so sorry.

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your mama so fat she should go see a doctor.

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What did the cow say to the other cow? Moo.

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What did a man say to the woman with two black eyes? Learn to duck.

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What's black and hangs from a tree? A tire swing.

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Why wasn't cacto at school that day. Because Silas gave him extreme butthole aids.

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Knock Knock Whose there? Get out of the bathroom Get out of the bathroom who? No, your in the bathroom

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A man walks into a bar........ gets eaten by a lion.

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What's better than r a p e? Consensual sex.

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Why is the grass always greener on the other side? because they have a landscaper.

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Did you fall from heaven? Cause your face is pretty messed up!

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Your momma went to the gym, because she is fat.

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why can't Michael Jackson bake a pie???? Because he's dead

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What did the man say when he found out he had cancer? Nothing. He was so in shock, that he later died from another type of cancer.

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What's orange, brown, and blue? An orange, brown, and blue object.

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What do you get when you cross a crocodile and a couch? A coat because vests don't have sleeves.

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What's oily and smells like smegma? Kevin Crummy

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69

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How many sheets did the Asian want on his bed? "You sheet on my bed I kill you!"

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Why did the kid poop his pants? He was a baby

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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