There once was a man from Peru, Who dreamed he was eating his shoe. He woke with a fright in the middle of the night and realized that his house was being robbed.

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Wanna hear a "Friday" parody? No, that would be copyright infringement.

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In soviet russia, the cow milks you!

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Roses are red Violets are blue Your grandpa's dead So are you.

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why did the slytherin cross the road twice? ... because they are double-crossers.

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what did the jewish man say to the christian man on the first day of hannukah? i like basketball

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Why'd the chicken cross the road? Who cares its a chicken, it probably got hit by a car. Go to McDonalds and get a chicken sandwich there he is

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What's the difference between a catholic priest and acne? Acne waits until the boys hit puberty before coming on their face.

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Have you ever seen Stevie Wonders house? I have it's actually really nice

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Why did somebody text "lol"? Because they laughed out loud.

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What did the over-baring Chinese couple say to there son who got an A- in math? How would I know? I can't speak Chinese.

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Q: What does a baby and an old man have in common? A: They both pee in public

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Have you heard of the lawnmower joke? No neither have I

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This guy dies and his wife gets him cremated. She takes the ashes home and lays them out on the table and starts talking to them. "You know that fur coat you promised me? I bought it with the insurance money. You know the new car you promised me? I bought it with the insurance money." Then she whispers, "You know that blow job I promised you? Well, here it comes..."

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What's the difference between your mom and a toaster? A toaster won't period in your cereal bowl.

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Hey look! Where? Above you, get the rebound.

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What does an emu an a kiwi have in common? Both are flightless birds endemic to there own countries.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Smell mop. Smell mop who? (smell my poo)

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Q how do you feel? A with a series of nerve endings, that send signals to my brain

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What do you call a bear in the rain? A wet bear.

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what's the difference between 7 and 2? 5

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How do you kill one Jew. A gun. How do you kill a thousand Jews. With a millon angery germans.

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what is funnier than a apple? a talking apple

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sharks

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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