What is the best invention ever? Taking a crap reverse. So you can enjoy a nice bowl of aids.

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A duck walks into a bar and buys a drink. When the bartender comes up he says put it on my bill

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Asexuals aren't known for f***ing around.

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yo mummas so FAT to get to the other side

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all hail based mark

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Person 1: So now that were friends on facebook, you wanna hang out? Person 2: No I'd rather not.

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I grew up, if we cannot live for ourselves, we cannot live for others, remember how people admired us when in their presence, while mocking us behind our backs, most humans do nor respect those that do not rule with lies, false promises, all backed up by an army no amount of civilians can defeat. We lost because people got what they wanted, preferring false promises from all ranging from their Gods, to their politicians speaking about their Gods, promises of betterment as a result of war in the name of Gods, but we are not that people. The problem is, that I used to believe that all of humanity possessed the potential people you and I have, and realize now that when I began looking down at people, I began looking down at myself, considering us all equal to them. Red, we might be few, but we are worth far more than those we consider our equals, maybe it is time even we, sought to rule those that desire to be ruled, rather than to help them find their desired path, because their desired path, might always have been to be ruled.

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How was Charles Manson able to get women to kill for him? Because he was charismatic and intelligent.

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PLEASE DONT READ THIS OR YOU'LL BE DIED IF YOU DON'T POST MESSAGE ON LIKE DIFFERENT VIDEO

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what happens when you punt a baby in between 2 poles? you get 3 points

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Why could the woman cook for her family? She didn't have one she was anti-social

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Two men are walking in a forest And they find this deep whole, so they spit in it to see how deep it but they here nothing So they throw a rock in and still hear nothing Them they find this old tramission and throw that in. A couple second later the goat comes running by and jumps in the whole A couple minutes pass and an old farmer walks up and asks if they had seen his goat and they replied" yea it just ran and jumped into that whole. The farmer says "that's weird considering I had him tied up to an old tramission

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Why couldn't Roger become an astronaut? Because Roger's a toaster.

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I drive a 'rarri

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Q: What's the difference between sheetrock and drywall? A: nothing. It's just two names for the same thing.

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Q: What did the guy say to his girlfriend? A: "I like turtles!" Then he smacks her ass.

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Did you hear about the guy with five penises? Me neither, because that sounds like a very improbable aberration.

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Why did Sarah fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock -Who's there Not Sarah

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I had 99 problems Solved them all

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Where did Susie go in the bombing? Nowhere. Susie is the bomber.

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why did the chicken cross the road? to get to your house. knock knock..... who's there? the chicken

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Why does Matt Daly do in his free time? it involves his finger and his own buttwhole

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If Jimmy has $5, and he finds $20 on the street, how much money does Jim have? None. He was mugged by a black man.

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Knock Knock? Who's there? How did you know it was me?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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