Why did the chicken cross the road? To cause global mayhem.

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Why do elephant tusks stick out? For uprooting trees and bushes, and for defending their young.

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What did the boy say to the Vietnam veteran? Where are your legs?

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What used to be red, but isn't anymore? A scalped ginger.

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What is green and would kill you if it fell out of a tree and onto your head? A pool table.

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What do you do when your girlfriend is bleeding? She is probably on her period.

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A man is wrongfully convicted of murder and sent to prison. After a lengthy appeals process the guilty verdict is overturned and he walks away a free man.

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there were two cyclists cycling at a steady pace down a main road in china, one irish and the other chinese. now they happened to be cycling at exactly the same time and exactly the same pace. why did the irish cyclist get pulled over and the chinese not? because the irish cyclist had in fact brutally raped and murdered a young child in his home town and then fled the country to china.

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your mums so fat! "last time i heard that i fell of my dinosaur!!" Oh man are you ok?

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Did you hear about the guy with no legs? He had them blown off by a tank shell in Afganistan.

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what's funny about war? nothing!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, there is no reason for a chicken to need to cross a road.

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watched pride and prejudice last night. I hate period dramas... too much blood

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Knock Knock? Who's There? Michael Jackson. Michael Jackson who? Shut up and give me ma dam candy women!

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What did the Icelandic man say to the Norwegian man? Vishtok yerder poten hash vil narsh varden.

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Holocaust. I was too lazy to make it complete, so enjoy the punchline and comment your own question. It will probably be funnier.

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What's circular and round A circle

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Your mother is so stupid she couldn't get a passing score on a standardized test.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Lettuce. THAT'S IMPOSSIBLE! AAAAHHHH!

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What looks like a horse, but smells and has feathers? A dead horse with a pidgeon in its ass.

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I donated to Kony 2012. Litterally to Kony. I approve of his actions.

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Knock Knock! Who's there? I don't remember the rest of the joke but your mom's a whore.

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Where do drunk asians live? In their house or apartment with their families, who are concerned about his drinking.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She has no arms. Knock Knock Who's there Not Sally Why can't Sally finish her ice cream She has no arms How do you fit Sally into a box? Put her in a blender. How do you get her out? A straw.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops