Why isn't Billy Mays on TV anymore? Beacause Billy Mays was in a tradgic accident where a bowling ball fell on his head, and a couple days later he died of head trama. His family can't bear to hear his voice anymore.

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How did Helen Keller burn the side of her face? She didn't use enough sunscreen.

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Where did susie go after the explosion? everywhere. What was susie after the explosion? a puzzle.

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What did the Polack do in the rainstorm? He got wet.

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I am tying up hostages. - Ethan R. 2015

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Knock Knock Who's there

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Whats fat yellow and diabetic Brett lai lan

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I put the word **** in a post. Anti Joke starred it and the joke didn't make sense anymore.

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Whats funny about a kid with down syndrome q: a lot of things, like his face

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What's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a mountainous mound of slain human offspring? There is none, the second is conferred to the subject of a conversation using a highly advanced vernacular.

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What do you call 10 black people swimming down a current? A happy family

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What do you call a black guy flying a plane? A pilot.

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Patient: Doctor, doctor! I feel like a pair of curtains! Doctor: That's because you are. Patient: Wow, I need to lay off the mushrooms.

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What did the bird say when he was riding the turtle? Weeee...

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Why does a squirrel have the tail at the back? Because at the front it's the squirrel.

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What did the one midget say to the other midget? We r both small

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Roses are red violents are blue I have 5 figures and the middle one is for you

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Why couldn't the blonde count to 70? because 69 was a mouth full:)

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What grows best during the cold Winter season? The number of deaths among homeless people.

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Knock knock Who's there? Jehovah's Witness

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You have 37 candy bars and you give your friend 12. What is the square route of the sun? Yes

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream? Because he saw a Vladimir Putin.

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yo mama is fat shes fat

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What do you call a Puerto Rican, a Blonde, and an African woman in a taxi cab? Three people who happen to be traveling to the same location at the same point in time.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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