cut it out ..but i dont have a scissor

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"Knock Knock" "Whos there?" "Its Adolf, we're going to camp."

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Roses are red,Lemons are sour,Open your legs and give me an hour.

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What happened when rudolf bucked Santa? Santa ripped his hooves off and started hitting his nose until it stopped glowing

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A black guy, a white guy and a Pakistani are walking together when they see a lamp, They rub the lamp and out pops a Genie who, with only three wishes to grant, lets them have one wish each. The Pakistani wishes that all people of Pakistani origin are returned to their country with health and wealth. The black guy thinks this is a good idea and asks for the same for all Africans and Caribbean's. The white guy says "are there really no more Pakistani's or blacks in the country?" The Genie confirms this is accurate. The white guy is devastated, who will drive the buses, operate the power stations, produce the medicines and work in the hospitals that these people did? I wish for them to be returned.

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How do you get 100 Jews in a car? It is physically impossible to fit 100 full grown homosapians into a vehicle, therefore it will not work.

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Tip for Employers: Avoid hiring unlucky people by immediately tossing half the resumes into the bin.

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There are fewer coppers on sundays. As well as criminality.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive a train? Because she's blind.

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What do you do if a goose comes flying towards you? Duck.

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Why couldn't the blonde bride make it to her own wedding? She had another unplanned circumstance occur and the wedding was postponed until next week.

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Why do Squirrels accidentally plant millions of trees. Because they bury their nuts and forget where they are.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the idiot's house... Knock knock Who's there? The Chincken

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How do you find the population of Mexico? Send out a census

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what did the homeless person get for Cristmas? nothing.

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How do you write an anti-joke? With the keyboard Or voice recognition software

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Why are asians such bad drivers? Cause they constantly have their eyes closed.

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Roses are red Violets are blue The other color on our flag is white I'm an American and rhyming doesn't matter

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One time there was a girl in a wheelchair and she couldn't walk.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Seven was a serial killer.

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What did the duck say? Nothing. Everyone knows that ducks can't talk.

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Why did Susie fall off the swing? Because she has no arms. Why did the baby fall off the swing? Because i hit it with a bat.

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what do you call a joke that is not a joke? not a joke

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Have you heartd about the blond that confused winow putty for KY jelly? Her windows fell out.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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