Whats the difference between males and females? fe

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An alligator crawled into a bar Animal control is promptly called and he is released in a nearby lake

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Why didnt Santa give the little Girl her Pony? Santas not real.

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Joe: Will you remember me tomorrow? Mack: Yes Joe: Will you remember me next week? Mack: Yes Joe: Will you remember me next month? Mack: Yes Joe: Will you remember me next year? Mack: Yes Joe: Knock knock Mack: Who's there? Joe: See you forgot me already! Mack: No I didn't Joe, I thought you were going to tell me a knock knock joke. :/

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A blind 1st grader is doing math. He can't figure out a problem so he asks his mom to help, his mom then ask "Why don't you just count by your fingers?" the little boy then said "MOM! I'm blind I can't see!" his mom replys "then how do you see your homework?" the boys replys "I opened my eyes, now help me"

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why did the little boy drop his ice cream cone? because he was hit by the planes that hit twin towers

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- Pete and Repeat are in a boat. Repeat falls off, who's left? - Pete? - F**k yes.

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Benny: Hi, my name is Benny, what's your name? A potato: ...

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So a guy says to his dog "hey man when you piss in the toilet can you please flush, just because I don't like to look at your pee." then the dog sits back and says "...woof !!"

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I slept through the Dark Knight movie....turns out I was pretty tired.

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Why did the short man fall down the stairs? He got shot in the face with an assault rifle.

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A black man walks into a store and grabs something off of a shelf. He walks briskly towards the door and pauses, looking sneakily left and right to make sure nobody else is around. He also looks and sees that the security camera is not facing him. Seeing as nobody is watching him, he quickly turns towards the counter beside the door and pays for the item with his own debit card, knowing that nobody can see him enter his PIN.

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What's a green tasty vegetable? None, they're vegetables.

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how do yopu punish helen keller? Ground her, just like you would with any other child.

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whats funny and has four wheels? A handicapped 11 year old boy getting raped by his father

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What's worse than finding half a worm in your Apple ? The holocust .

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A Chinese man walks into a bar. With his thick accent, he finds it difficult to order drinks.

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How many licks does it take to get to the tootsie-roll center of a tootsie-pop? zero if you bite it

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Everybody will die

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what does nike and the kkk have in common? Nothing as one is a brand of clothing ie;shoes, hoodies, etc. while the other is a racist cult formed in the 19th century which persecuted african americans.

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What would you call a two-foot Irishman named Max? Max.

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i have a black man in my family tree. i am 25% african american among several other ethnicities.

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Knock Knock Sadly the old woman was death and didn't hear the door knock.

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Why did the little boy throw his clock out of the window? After hours of searching for the snooze button to no avail, the little boy became so irritated at the incessant ringing of the alarm that he threw it out of his window in a fit of rage. The clock landed on an old woman who was walking twenty stories below. She was immediately killed on impact.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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