What does two plus two equal? 4

thumb_up thumb_down +11

How many potatoes does it take to kill an Irishman? None.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

what does the black man say to the white man? nice weather were having huh.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Person 1- your face is a stupid joke Person 2- you're right, because it's not a joke its a face

thumb_up thumb_down +34

You're at a funeral & your phone goes off and the ringtone is dead and gone

thumb_up thumb_down +10

An asian man and his friend walk into a bar. They both order a few drinks and drink them responsibly. They then pay for their drinks, and drive home to their loving families.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

how did the thirteen year old girl get pregnant? she was raped.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

A man walks into a bar. He is genetically predisposed to alcoholism, and it's destroying his family.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Everytime God shuts a door, he opens a window... ...But I am the Goddamn locksmith!

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why did the pilot crash the plane? It was a tomato.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

what did the fish say when i threw it at the wall. Ouch. Then the world ended because it caused a ripple in the fabric of reality.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

roses are red violets are blue i thought i was ugly but then i met you

thumb_up thumb_down +11

'Hey do you know a joke?' 'No' 'Me too'

thumb_up thumb_down +41

Have you heard the one of the two headed man an the horse? Neither have I

thumb_up thumb_down +14

what happens when you have A.D.D.? you're EXTREMELY annoying

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Whats In My Trash? Bears

thumb_up thumb_down -23

i found waldo.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why did the prestigious college accept the Native American student? Trick question, Native Americans don't exist anymore.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Question: What did Mr. Reeves say. Answer: Nothing

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Why did Helen Keller's dog run away? Because her mother inadvertently left the gate open while gardening.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

A girl that had Malaria couldn't play with her friends, whys this? She died.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

A man walks into a bar and notices a twelve inch tall man playing a small piano. He asks the bartender about it. The bartender explains that the pianist has worked there for some time, mostly performing on weeknights. The bartender also tells the man that he may be suffering some vision problems, as the pianist is about 5'8" or 5'9". Some time later the man visits an optometrist and finds out he has a severe case of astigmatism.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Contrary to popular belief- And this just in. My daughter has breast cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +55

even a blind squirrel finds a nut every now and then. but has a high probability of getting hit by a car and slowly dying from crushed limbs

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops