If you have a dinosaur, how many bicycles do you need to do your homework? Yes, because chewing gums would ask if Greg can go to the handball match.

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A muslim man takes a flight to New York. He lands safely at JFK airport.

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New groundbreaking research has just revealed today that a complex sentence can be used to manipulate the human mind, so in this sentence somewhere is a psychological amemphism that subconsciously hypnotises the mind into doing something within the next five seconds, and if you read this sentence over and over again, you might just spot it!

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What did Han Solo say to Chewy before they got in the Millennium Falcon? Chewy, get in the ship.

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What's the difference between George W Bush and a doorknob? George W Bush is the president of the United States. A doorknob is a mechanical device that securely closes a hinged door, thereby keeping your family safe from danger.

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why was the little girl crying? Because her family was dead

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What did all of the blind children sing on the bus ride? Nothing because they drove off a cliff

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Q: What do you call a room full of black people? A: A Social Gathering.

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roses are blue violets are red... i have to use the bathroom

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What is red and smells like brown feces? Bloody feces

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what's worse than the holocaust living jews

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Who are doctors and literally are porn stars

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roses are red violets are blue holy sh*t slendermans behind you

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Where did Lucy go after being hit by a train? Well, the results of this question are somewhat difficult to pinpoint, but here is a generalized ratio model. 47% of Lucy went underneath the trains wheels and was left behind, crushed into the railway sleepers. 33% was thrown aside and discarded around the SIDES of the track. 19% was carried on the front of the train, into the next station where it fell off as soon as the train stopped. 1% was found in Mount Everest.

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I was playing Black Ops online, my wife turned it off in the middle of the game....I killed her

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You're mama's SO stupid that when she applied to college, they were happy to help.

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what's the worst part of your kid dying the clean up

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What did the stuffed animal say to the human after the human said hi? Nothing, after all stuffed animals can't talk

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Roses are red Violets are blue I look down My pants are brown.

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How many children does it take to kill a homocidal killer? None. Children should not attempt such a dangerous task.

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what is the difference between a black man and a bucket of shit? The bucket.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm bipolar NO I'M NOT!!

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What did the black cat say to the tabby cat?? Meow

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roses are red violets are blue i'm a schizophrenic and so am i

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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